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How to exercise your iron will?
1. Be proactive
Proactive willpower allows you to overcome inertia and focus on the future. When you encounter resistance, imagine how happy you will be after overcoming it; actively engage in specific practices to achieve your goals, and you will persevere. An East Coast businessman knew he drank too much. However, he had a boring job, and drinking a few glasses of wine before a meal seemed to relax his nerves. But the combination of alcohol and tiring work made him often fall asleep as soon as he finished drinking. One day, the manager realized he was wasting his time drinking away his sorrows. So he was greedy again and brought more children to him. It was not easy at the beginning, and he often thought of the fragrant wine, but he warned himself that what he was doing now would result in gains rather than losses. Later facts proved that the more he cared about his family and children, the more motivated he was at work.
2. Make up your mind
James Prowse, a professor at the University of Rhode Island in the United States, divides the realization of a certain change into four steps:
1. Resist - —Unwilling to change;
2. Consideration—weighing the pros and cons of change;
3. Action—cultivating willpower to achieve change;
4. Persistence – Use willpower to keep the transformation going.
In order to make up your mind, you can set a deadline for achieving your goals. Maggie Collins is a teacher in California who is very concerned about how to lose weight. Later, she was elected as the chairman of a marketing organization and decided to lose 6 kilograms. For this reason, she bought clothes that were two sizes smaller than her own body and wanted to wear them at the annual meeting in three months. Thanks to persistence, Collins finally got what he wanted.
3. Clear goals
Professor Pross once studied a group of experimental subjects who planned to change their behavior starting from New Year's Day. It was found that the most successful were those with the most specific and clear goals. people. One of the men was determined to be kind and equal to his wife every day. Later, he really did it. The other person just expressed in general terms that he wanted to be better to his family members, but within a few days it was the same quarrel as before.
4. Weigh the pros and cons
If you are half-hearted about physical exercise because you cannot see the actual benefits, mere desire will not make you willingly put on running shoes. Professor Pross advises people who come to him for consultation that they can draw four grids on a piece of paper to fill in short-term and long-term losses and gains. If you plan to quit smoking, you can fill in the top two boxes with short-term losses: "I felt sad at first" and short-term gains: "I can save a lot of money"; fill in the bottom two boxes with long-term gains: "My The body will become healthier" and long-term losses: "I will promote a way to relieve boredom." Through such careful comparison, it will be easier to gather the willpower to quit smoking.
5. Change yourself
It is not enough to know the gains. The most fundamental motivation comes from the desire to change one's own image and control one's own life. Reasons can sometimes be convincing, but only when emotions are aroused can one truly respond.
6. Pay attention to the spirit
Touranvois, the famous French general in the 17th century, was famous for leading by example and standing at the front of the team every time he fought. When asked about this by others, he said bluntly: "My actions looked like a brave man, but I was extremely scared from beginning to end. I did not give in to timidity, but said to my body - 'Old man, Although you are trembling, you still have to charge forward!'" As a result, he charged forward resolutely. A large number of facts have proved that acting as if you have a strong will will help you become a strong person.
7. Strengthen the will
As early as 1915, psychologist Boyd Barrett proposed a method of training the will. Including getting up and sitting down from the chair 30 times, pouring out a box of matches and putting them back into the box one by one. He believes that these exercises can enhance willpower so that he can face more serious and difficult challenges in the future. Barrett's specific advice may seem dated, but his line of thinking is inspiring.
For example, you could plan in advance what you want to do on Sunday morning and decide not to eat lunch until you finish it.
8. Persist to the end
As the saying goes, "Where there is a will, there is a way." It means fighting against difficulties and overcoming them. Prowse studied people who quit smoking and then started smoking again and found that many people had not thought carefully about how to deal with the temptation of cigarettes. So even if you muster up the strength to quit smoking, you can't stick to it. When someone handed me a cigarette, I took it and started smoking. If you decide to quit drinking, don't touch your glass in any situation. If you insist on jogging, even if it rains heavily when you wake up in the morning, do it indoors.
9. Seek truth from facts
If you are required to lose 25 kilograms within 3 months, or you must engage in 3 hours of physical exercise a day, then for such an unachievable goal, The strongest will is of no avail. Moreover, the consequences of failure can negate your desire to try again. In many cases, it is a good idea to break a single large goal into many smaller goals. Bob, who plans to quit drinking, posted a sign in his room - "Every day without a drink." Since the overall goal of quitting drinking is broken down into specific actions every day, you can clarify your determination again the next day. By the end of the week, Bob looked back on his series of "victories" with confidence and finally said goodbye to wine.
10. Gradual cultivation
Strong will does not appear suddenly overnight. It is gradually accumulated and will inevitably encounter setbacks and failures. You must find out how to make yourself Only the causes of low morale can be addressed in a targeted manner. The first time Mary quit smoking, she made a lot of determination and ended up failing. As she analyzed the reasons, she realized she needed to do something instead of getting a cigarette. Later she bought needles and wool and knitted sweaters when she wanted to smoke. A few months later, Mary gave up smoking completely and knitted a wool vest for her husband, which was really "killing two birds with one stone."
11. Advance with victory
Practice has proved that every success will further strengthen your willpower. If you use your tenacious will to overcome a bad habit, then Can gain the confidence to challenge the duel again and win. Each success can increase your self-confidence by one point and provide you with a solid "foothold" on the arduous journey of climbing the cliff. Perhaps the new tasks we face are more difficult, but since we succeeded before, we will definitely succeed this time and in the future.
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