Funny copywriting with lively atmosphere

1. Teacher: "Imagine 1. What should you do if the bad guys follow you? " Xiao Ming: "Stop imagining at once!"

2. When getting ready for bed, my roommate said to me in a panic: "There seems to be someone outside the door. Go and have a look. " Surprised, I climbed out of bed carefully, opened the door and found no one. Roommate said, "Turn off the lights."

3. A very thin person met a very fat person. The fat man said, "Look at you, there was a famine on the road." The thin man replied, "Yes, but judging from your appearance, you should have caused the famine."

My colleague is on a business trip. When he got on the train, he found others sitting in his seat. Then his colleague went over and deliberately showed the ticket to the person sitting in the seat. Then he said, "Brother, I can't read. Please help me to see where my ticket is. " Eldest brother took a look and said, "Brother, this is the standing ticket. You can stand there. " .

I asked a child to dance, and he said weakly, "I can't." I said, "Boys should be confident and bold". As a result, he shouted, "I won't."

6. Brush your teeth in the morning, and my son will use my toothpaste. I said, you can't use it You are still young, so use baby toothpaste. He gave me a cold look and said, Mom, you are so stingy. You use my baby cream every day, and I never mentioned you!

7. Everyone is: I don't know what I am doing, but I am deepening; Only I am different, I am: money is nowhere to be found, as poor as a church mouse.

Eight. Listening to music with headphones today, I found that there was no sound on the left. After inspection, it was found to be a false alarm. It turned out that I couldn't hear in my left ear, and I thought the earphone was broken, which scared me.

9. Do you know why the husband wants to raise a wife? It turns out that "husband" is reverse. "Husband" reads "Pay the bill" in reverse!

Every time you go shopping, people will tell you that if you really want it, I will give you a cheaper price. You see, sincerity is so worthless!

1 1. Couples buy pots in two shopping malls. The man played a few times when he chose the pot, and felt very comfortable, so he gave his wife the result. The wife picked it up and pretended to pat the man and said, that's it, it's very convenient. I was shocked!

12. When quarreling with your husband, don't blame him in a hurry, but reflect on yourself first. If you are really wrong, think about how to pass it on to him.

Thirteen. The strangest thing in the world is that my mother took my father's salary card and told me to be smart and not to give it to my future wife.

14. I went to the restaurant that day and ordered a rice noodle. As a result, the boss asked me: Pack or take away ... Boss, can't I eat here?

As a junior high school student, my family often suspects that I am in love. I just want to say seven words to them about this matter: you overestimate me.

15. People will change. For example, I used to want to get rich, but now it's different. Now I just want to get rid of poverty!

17. I envy those who can be with the people I like. Unlike me, I have long been surrounded by people who like me.

18. It snowed a little in the morning. On the way to buy food, I saw an old man fall down. I rushed to help him, but my foot slipped and I kicked him further. ...

19. I pretend to be cold after every exam, because when others are arguing about whether the answer is A or B, I can't figure out why I chose C.

20. Accompanying his wife back to her mother's house coincides with her sister-in-law's 23rd birthday. I gave a red envelope of 23 yuan, and she called me stingy. Later, her mother-in-law said to her sister-in-law in the kitchen, "Don't say that about your brother-in-law in the future. He is stingy because he has no money, and he has no money because he married your sister. "