To the diary of our lost years

Well, nonsense, boring, idiot, naive, boring.

This is the first evaluation I gave you on the day I left you. Although I had already guessed that you would leave, I don’t know why I still dropped a drop of my eye.

I have imagined our separation countless times, whether it was a text message, a random noise, or even you holding someone else's hand and saying, so be it! And I was wrong. No matter how unreasonable it was, the ending was not as interesting as yours.

You are such an idiot. Do you think I don’t know? In fact, you are tired of it, too tired, enough is enough. Everything, from beginning to end, I was tired too! In fact, there is always a secret that I haven't told you. The first time, when you said ‘I have a crush on you’, I also thought about whether I had been attracted to you, but then, NO! I was wrong, I made a wrong choice, and just like that, a choice separated us.

Maybe this is the first time I’ve met you! How can strangers talk about feelings? SO...I forgot about you on the way here.

However, God is really tricking people. I don’t know whether it is fate or your intention. You have also forgotten me and I have forgotten you. After getting along with each other, you remain the same. I think, you said The phrase "getting to know you" may be true, but even so, you still remember it and I forget it.

The long road, once acquaintances are like running water, flowing away in a hurry and never returning. Who would have expected that things will go as they should, and the past will repeat itself like smoke.

The same problem leads to the same ending. Things are people, but memories are not. It was such a rush, there was such a separation, I couldn't help but laugh. Why do you have such a familiar temperament? It's a pity that no matter what question, everything lost may be the unsolvable mystery.

I like to write your name on every book and page. I don’t know why? Can't get rid of the shadow, that's what that fool said. Word by word, until your friends talk about you, I can't help but sigh. Whether what he said is true or not, who knows whether it is true or not.

It’s a bet, all the emotions are on the line, the emotions are ridiculous, I don’t know if we can really get along with each other if we use a topic to talk about our past, but what I know is, but When I embarked on the road of getting to know you again, I seemed to feel that I had also lied against my will.

However, I am also afraid. A bet once made me afraid of your words, true or false. I don’t know how to choose, but the only thing I dare to do is to throw away... With such emotion, I would place this bet, even if I lose completely.

It was a total defeat. I lost, I lost everything. I had already thought of the ending, separation! These two words were placed in front of me. For the first time, I feel so helpless. What you said is really good. Maybe you seem to have already made a draft.

Do you believe it? To be honest, if I said to you ‘I have a crush on you’ when we finally separated, I would actually say it with a smile.

Do you know why?

Because I already knew the ending at that time. Your weird behavior and your boredom made everything unsustainable.

Your nonsense is even more lengthy. I sighed. If the whole world changes, then no matter how it changes, the ending will not change, right?

Word by word, you asked me, I knew what I should say to make you happy, but I did not do it truthfully, I chose another answer. But the final answer to that answer is something you never expected!

Maybe that's it, you said you can't take a joke, because time has tired you; because time has forgotten you; because time has forgotten you from the beginning.

So everything is calm. Today you may be holding someone else's hand and saying what you said. And another girl is also placing a bet of her life on you.

What about me? I laughed. The moment I stood on the high rooftop and the wind blew past my ears, what I wanted to say was that the phrase 'I have a crush on you' was a lie. In fact, what I really wanted to say was 'You ever had a crush, but later, let me chilling, so that's it, goodbye! '

Want to write down my thoughts

Staying quietly alone, or lying quietly on a small bed, Or you can lean alone in front of the window and describe your empty soul in detail, without being disturbed by the wind or startled by the rain; far away from the hustle and bustle of the world, not being turned by the wind or trapped by the rain; your thoughts are like flying snowflakes, falling silently. Breathless, not stirring up a speck of dust, it is neither like the wind - swaying invisibly and boasting arrogantly, nor like the rain - making a fuss and making a fuss.

Stay alone quietly, or sip a cup of fragrant tea, enjoying the loneliness and solitude; or hold a book, intoxicated by the perceptual words, and let the joys and sorrows that have nothing to do with others slide through the heart. .

Or use the Qianqian Tears pen to string together the past that has been dried by time, and exile the true feelings on the purple paper, charming.

Or recalling the happiness and warmth of the past, even with tears streaming down your face, you still have a smile on your lips! Listen to the murmur of drizzle in the breeze, touch the distance between hearts, and savor the taste of life.

Staying alone alone, picking up a few strands of lovesickness, or singing softly for helplessness, or chanting regret for missing, or expressing nostalgia for beauty, or stirring for longing. My heart is sometimes filled with joy, and sometimes I sigh lightly, but this has nothing to do with others.

Watch the growing thoughts. When the thoughts are mature, let the soul open up, write to express feelings, and quietly let go of your thoughts; quietly weave the peerless and unrestrained helplessness, and let your thoughts accumulate into a thick white Loneliness and peace of mind.

Stay quietly alone, enjoy the four seasons competing for favor, admire the spring glow through the window, silently comfort the sadness of the sunset, listen to the birds chirping, the gentle breeze whisper, chew the floating memories, let the piano and the piano play A popping sound in the chest.

Quietly, smile at the nobility of ice and snow, cherish the fruits of spring and autumn, cherish the blooming and falling of flowers, let the fragrant soul be with your heart, and your thoughts will be beautiful and free.

Quietly watch the clouds roll and relax, go my own way, be calm in the storm, not cold or frightened, and be calm.

Stay alone and watch the moon peeking out of the window, swaying lightly against the dullness of the day, soothing your fatigue and warming your mind; finding a fulcrum of balance for your thoughts, and finding a place for relaxation for your feelings. Within the scope, let tiredness stay away from complexity and become relaxed, let great love flow in the trickle of life, let the soul be purified in the trickle, the mind is simple and happy; the bustle and prosperity are contented, and troubles and sorrows are known to stop like mountains, appreciate the subtleties, be peaceful and calm. lifetime.

Stay alone quietly, let elegance be pure in simplicity, let your thoughts be free and smooth in tranquility, let everything return to indifference, tranquility becomes a pool of still water, feel the heartbeat of a person, without chaos, No worries, no disturbances, no wind or rain!

Staying alone quietly is a meaningless waste, and it is also a very precious cultivation of life; savoring the true meaning of life in silence is a kind of ultimate cultivation, as the saying goes: doing nothing. Something to do. Give life a different kind of splendor, and let the limited life be boundless in wisdom and thinking!

Release the spring scenery of a mountain

Bing Xin once wrote in "One Day of Spring": "After ninety days, I don't believe in spring anymore!" That was written The north is blocked by wind and sand, and the spring has been delayed. People living in the beautiful mountains and rivers of the south have never experienced the feeling of longing for but not getting it, and feeling haggard due to bitter lovesickness!

However, this year’s spring is really making people yearn for it! Waves of cold waves and snowstorms have blocked the door to spring.

The Jingzhe has passed, the vernal equinox has passed, but the stupid cotton-padded jacket is still tightly wrapped around the body, the jasmine flowers that should have bloomed long ago have not even revealed their buds, and the bravest ivy dare not stretch out its feet! The muscles and bones that longed to stretch out in the spring breeze lazily could not do so. The vigorous outing party that was looking forward to gathering together waited and waited, and finally it was time! Comparing this time in previous years, I complained about the delay in spring in the mountains, and melancholy about the lake that could not be warmed up. It was clear and clear, but too cold! ——Except for the reeds that still keep popping up all over the ground, even the ducks don’t dare to try the water in the Spring River!

Some time ago, one day, the sky suddenly cleared up. I hurriedly took off my cotton-padded jacket, put on my warm yellow light spring clothes, invited my friends, and went to the park to enjoy the spring. Unexpectedly, it turned sunny on the way. It was overcast, followed by a cold wind and a heavy drizzle. I couldn't believe it. She came so quickly and suddenly, and how could she go so quickly and naturally? Stubbornly carrying a few branches of red plums in the cold wind, supporting a young willow tree, walking by the lakeside, watching the microwaves in the rain, climbing high and looking into the distance, watching the flying giants in the sky, desperately wanting to leave traces of spring. Unexpectedly, Chun didn't appreciate it. She used her coldness to make me seriously ill when I returned home, and it took me two weeks to recover. From then on, I suddenly understood in my heart that overly enthusiastic expectations, like a fire that is too bright, will easily burn out and disappear into ashes. Can everything in nature be obtained by force?

In this way, spring, everything that heralds light, hope and vitality to me, everything that I urgently need to make life lively, but has not come yet, makes me I feel at peace. My beating heart has calmed down. I can listen to sounds and see colors. All my feelings are not just for spring. Gradually, I have returned to my former sensitivity.

Unknowingly, slowly, day by day, the sky is changing, from gloomy and low pressure to gradually opening up, the weather is also changing, from continuous cold rain to warm and shy sun, the earth is getting warmer, this time Because of the warmth, we skipped early spring and came directly to mid-spring. As if in just a blink of an eye, the winter jasmine flowers bloomed brilliantly everywhere, forming stunning walls, and the ivy spread its branches in an instant. A green blanket covering the withered yellow of winter!

As I hurriedly walked through the street, the wind, like an unruly child, pulled at the skirt of my clothes, blowing in the east and west. Looking around, it seems like just one night, the mobile stalls that change according to the solar terms are filled with colorful kites. "Children come back early from school and are busy taking advantage of the east wind to fly kites." I inadvertently recited a poem and thought to myself, it's time to buy a kite and fly it!

I am a clumsy person. I have never made a complete kite since I was a child, so naturally I have never flown it. The year before last, I saw a big kite on the street and bought one. I held it high and ran back and forth twenty or thirty times from uphill to downhill. I was so tired that I was sweating profusely. I just hoped that it would have enough wind to fly. It got up, but it still refused to take off dejectedly. It floated to its feet again, and finally had to give up. However, no matter how hard a blow is, it can't dampen the desire to fly high. Every spring, when I see the kite fluttering and ready to fly, the feeling of flying it myself will become stronger. At this moment, I can’t wait to buy one to fulfill my lifelong wish!

I took the kite and went to Zishan Reservoir with my family. Last summer when it was hot, I came here to enjoy the coolness in the evening. Seeing the lake full of water satisfied people's desire to cool off. The green mountains surrounding the water only served as a backdrop to the water, so I never thought of walking into the mountains. On this bright spring afternoon, my idle heart has nowhere to rest, and the high-flying kite needs a flat and high place to go. Therefore, in search of secluded places, we walked along the winding but wide mountain road, and then walked When we entered, we were surrounded by mountains and there was no way out, suddenly we saw a bright sight, a flat and open mountain land appeared in front of us. Next to this large flat, a stretch of clear water lay quietly in the embrace of the mountain, like a docile The woman is nestled next to her lifelong lover, the flowing water is quiet, it is those loving eyes.

In the reflection of the mountains by the water, there are three or two fishermen sitting quietly regardless of the harvest; there are a few bricks for barbecue on the ground; at the foot of the mountain, a group of young college students are sitting on the wire fence Burning the masterpiece they had just strung together; on the mountainside path surrounded by water, two pairs of lovers were walking arm in arm; there were also a few people picking wild vegetables on the mountain. The green hills in the distance are rolling, and even further away, the city's towering buildings and noisy figures all become a silent background... It's like an alternative "Peach Blossom Land" picture! In the past few days, I have been in the center of the hustle and bustle, and I have long lost the paradise in my heart. How could I know that outside the world, there are naturally people who can be so carefree and leisurely in the harshest environment, and live up to the profound meaning of creation!

Hai chose a high open space, took advantage of a strong wind, and let go of the kite, and the kite actually flew lightly! However, due to the carelessness and ease of flying it, he was so proud. When he was proud, the thread got entangled in the waving hand, so he lowered his head to get the thread, but the kite could not hold it and fell crookedly. well! I ran over to save him, but it was too late! By chance, the falling kite fell into the water, and the string was dragged along. It took a lot of effort to get it up. The string became knotted and knotted, and it had to be untied, which made me confused and lost interest. The warm afternoon sun was shining, and I was feeling tired. I said, "Let it go. I'll go to the terrace and watch."

After figuring it out, Hai ran back and forth with it, but the kite refused to cooperate. It fell to the lower part of the slope and hung on the treetop, which made him confused. Frustration, the last time, it seemed that even Dongfeng couldn't bear to see him so persistent and fruitless. After blowing again and again, the kite soared upwards, and finally proudly looked down at everything on the earth from high in the sky! At this time, the fisherman raised his head and praised loudly, what a beautiful release! The young people eating barbecue stood high and applauded; the lovers by the river also pointed to the sky and poured out their visions to each other. Everyone's mood became brighter because of this high-flying kite! I looked at all this from a distance, and my heart was filled with warm emotions! Looking at the surrounding mountains that are not high, they seem to be moving with the kite. The mountains are greener, the flowers are redder, and the spring colors all over the mountains are rippling in the water...

At this time, there is light and vitality. , hope, determination to resist the cold, belief in meeting challenges, and countless worries that are too numerous to mention, are all on the back of the kite, blending with the lively spring scenery in the mountains.

You know, spring is really here.

In early winter, there is a frosty word on the brocade handkerchief

The tears never fall lightly because the heart has never been broken. I wish I had you all my life, I just let you go because I can’t help myself. The word "wait" wastes life. It has swallowed up all the scenery given by the years, and also wiped out my devotion to the Buddha...

- Inscription

There is a piece of nature, which is a monologue after tossing and turning. There is an inch of fertile soil, and only the written interpretation can wander alone. There is a kind of waiting, it is the shadow accompanying me. There is a piece of helplessness, and no amount of redemption can escape it. There is a long road, a gray area with no end.

It is said that late autumn is like a trail of cool leaves, but I always feel that early winter is like a frosty word on a brocade handkerchief. No matter how you apply the color, it will still be cool. I always wanted to write this stroke by stroke as gentle, but as soon as the ink fell lightly, the coldness cut through the silk, and I still felt a chill coming to my face. When I feel sleepy late at night, tears will flow from the corners of my eyes, and I seldom write. I like the quietness of dawn. Watching the sky lighten up little by little, my heart is like the calm surface of a lake. Perhaps life is just a piece of brocade, some are bright and eye-catching, and some are elegant and indifferent. What does my picture look like?

I think it is a bunch of grass. It has been green and yellow, and no longer sprouts or blooms. It is a silent painting, a line of words, no one needs to understand, no one needs to feel pain, loneliness is addictive, and you can't extricate yourself. I don’t want anyone to disturb me. If you happen to see me while passing by, don’t say anything! If I like you, I'll appreciate it tacitly. If I don't, don't say anything, because I won't express anything to you.

The days were cloudy and windy, and every word began to lie dormant. Winter is still bright, but I feel lazy and want to sleep. I don’t know how many flowers have fallen in my dream, but I only know how lush the jade is. Dreams are covered with pothos, and I don’t want to wake up.

There was a noisy sound, which was the distant voice calling: You can't sleep all the time, there are still three inches of soil in the world, waiting for you to come back and cultivate. It turned out that it seemed like a dream but not a dream. I had been alert for a long time.

The cold of early winter is like a cold inkstone. It needs a fire to burn it until it is hot enough to polish the green color of the willows. In the silent sigh of the night, there is the carnage of the cold west wind, the eyes of the stars are dodging, and the moon hides half of its face, pretending to be indifferent. There may be a snow tomorrow, coming silently. Let the dream dance in the snow, and the silver-covered clarity brews and resurrects. When the plum blossoms bloom, I will meditate under the tree, listen to you talk about Zen, and watch you become a Buddha! I can't unlock it, I can't reach the shore of the world of mortals, I can only drift. No need to say more whether you understand or not, no one will remember it in the next life. Broken and rubbed, there will be a legend left in the wind and snow, we loved it deeply.

That agarwood wine makes the shadow begin to tilt. Holding the verdant night, the skirt dances lightly in the moonlight. Every footprint is a drunken flower. It just doesn't smell good, maybe it's not drunk, it's just an illusion. The moment I was holding on to the wall, I heard the wind talking, but I was barefoot, and I lost my shoes at some point...

Dawn did not call, and getting up early had become a habit. It was still dark, so I hurriedly finished my work. breakfast. It's very cold, so let yourself hide in the warmth of the bed and warm your cold hands and feet. The moon showed half of its face, and it was a bit pitiful without the company of stars. There is not a single cloud in the huge sky, it is truly vast.

The sky turned white and gradually became brighter. Suddenly I thought, it would be great if there was a plum tree in the yard at this moment. No matter how cold it is, I would go out and pick incense. It must be the red plum, the first thing I see when I see you in the snowy dawn. Just like an ancient woman wearing red makeup, she is dignified and gentle, making people feel pity for her but not daring to blaspheme her in the slightest.

Don’t make the tree full of flowers, just a few flowers or two branches will be enough. I prefer the budding look, just like a shy girl. Throughout my life, I have never seen plum blossoms, but I love them from the bottom of my heart. I like the ancient breath, with a wisp of fragrant soul, and the proud snow blooming in the distance. You are the warmth of the flowers in the world, and the cold night is accompanied by the moonlight. If I could pick two of them, I would definitely put them next to my pillow, so that the fragrance would dye my dreams, and I would not feel cold at night when the snow is dancing.

Living a happy-go-lucky life, everything seems to have turned pale. I locked the dream in that old-fashioned box and never touched it again. Regarding love, even if it can be broken in the end, I still can't let it go. It is destined to be a deep-seated love that I can't let go of.

My long hair dances in the wind, and I watch the clouds roll and relax. The loneliness that cannot be dismissed has been branded as belonging to me. Who is repairing the wasted time, and who is pretending not to care? Everything is God's clerical error, and the two ends of the red line are tied to nothingness and bones. The lonely journey, running rain or shine, has gone through countless hardships. One person's persistence will eventually make ends meet. You are my only bet in this life. Knowing that I will lose, I am still a moth to the flame, so I rush to it happily and become a prisoner of love...

I have been chased by many people, just like a special flower, and I have never been around. There is no shortage of bees coming closer. But I no longer had the energy to take another look, and I knew deeply that the only love in my life had already brewed into a towering tree. Even in the cold winter, with the biting wind and snow blowing, the branches are trembling without the lush leaves, but they bloom in the soil of the soul and penetrate into the bones.

A person's life is not necessarily related to love. It would be simple if he didn't think about anything. Slowly count the passing years and pass the time. But once you think about it, the burden can never be taken off. If there is a shadow living in your heart, you will no longer be able to see the expected expressions of others.

Some people can understand you with just one look, and they just gently hold you in their arms, pat your back, and say: I am here, don’t cry! It will make the heart warm and unable to calm down for a long time. This understanding is really difficult to find, just like a boat that keeps wandering in the sea, the heart always wants to dock. In the dead of night, I will look at the moon outside the window and miss you quietly. What are you doing at the moment? Are you cold or not? Is there anything bothering you? Do you think of me too? Then he closed his eyes and let the big tears fall into the cold.

The moment the tears fall, parting has become eternal. Accept the difficulties of the years and compromise with yourself.

The oath of betrayal will never be fulfilled. Regret is like an arrow leaving the string, breaking up with me. The moment the tears fell, I had tasted all the hardships, and the blood tested the depth of love in the world.

They say let go of what you can’t have, but saying it and doing it are completely different things. What can be forgotten is not love, what can be let go is not love. All I can do is not disturb your sky, but be a pair of eyes that silently protect and bless you. Just let your heart float in the sea and never wake up in this life. My heart is like a thousand cuts, and the end of my writing is like a shackle...