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How to deal with interpersonal relationships?
Look at others' strengths
No one is perfect, everyone has shortcomings. If you always stare at other people's shortcomings, your relationship will definitely not be good. On the contrary, learn to put yourself in others' shoes and look at others' advantages, and you will find that the more you look at others, the more likable you will be, the better you will get along with others and know how to make use of your own advantages. It's not that spring stands out, but that spring is full of flowers. Only those who know how to get along with others can succeed. Know how to use your talents, and you will have the qualities of a leader.
It is difficult to help others.
Is to lend a helping hand when others are in trouble. It may take a little effort, or it may take some effort. As long as you can, icing on the cake is better than giving charcoal in the snow.
If you help someone in the spring breeze, he may not remember you. You helped others when they were in trouble, and they will remember you for life. When you are in trouble, others will help you, and your road will get wider and wider. For example, some things that are often encountered in life, such as illness and hospitalization, weddings and funerals, natural disasters and man-made disasters, etc. Your help, your greeting and even a short message will be like spring breeze, which will completely narrow the psychological distance between them.
Remember the interests of the people.
Always be grateful. You know, everyone, from birth to death, every progress, every harvest, can not be separated from the help of parents, family and friends. Always remember the goodness of others, so that you can have sunshine every day, friends every day and be happy all your life; On the contrary, always remembering other people's mistakes will only make you suffer.
When I was studying, I chased the program "Career Come, Career Go". At that time, I was in college, and I really learned a lot about the workplace and being a man from this program. Nowadays, variety shows feel like entertainment and cater to the public. Now that I have graduated for more than three years, I have a deeper understanding of some sentiments!
How to deal with interpersonal relationships?
Be yourself first and others will make friends with you!
I realized that only by making myself beautiful will others be more willing to make friends with you. If you are a liar, a slob, or full of negative energy all day, don't say that friends will get farther and farther away from you, and you may not even make any friends!
I especially agree with one sentence: what life needs is to struggle by yourself.
Make yourself better, everyone is willing to make friends with you, and then you will know how to make friends and establish your own interpersonal relationship.
How to learn to be a better self;
First of all, image is an internal commitment.
In the process of building your own image, you should match your words with your deeds. If you don't do what you say, others won't believe you. For example, if the fake market sells luxury bags, you won't believe that the bags on the shelves are genuine. So personal image is very important in the circle.
Second, keep your promise and build your personalized credit card.
Sometimes we make promises to others inadvertently. A casual sentence may not be noticed for a while and then forgotten, but you may be greatly impressed by others. And when you pay attention to what you say on a very small matter, others will be deeply moved and think that they can communicate. Of course, keeping promises is sometimes not for getting anything, but the most basic criterion for us to be human.
Third, bid farewell to negative energy.
Keep smiling. Smiling is contagious. It is said that people who love to laugh will not be too unlucky. Everyone likes to make friends with people who love to laugh, but they don't like people who always keep a straight face and are bitter all day, so as not to be treated badly by emotional contagion. How to solve your negative energy? Grow flowers, keep pets, do sports and so on!
We * * * live on the same earth, and people, things and things will inevitably have intersection and friction. How to deal with the relationship between them and how to solve the contradiction between things, mentality and methods has become the key.
-inscription
Everyone wants to live happily in this world. Happiness comes from relaxation, and mentality comes from openness. Only by correcting yourself can we live without being tired.
Many times, we are always good at discovering other people's mistakes and ignoring others' kindness to ourselves. No one is a saint. Within a certain range, it is true to accept what is acceptable and never accept it, and to look at people with your heart.
Meanwhile, learn to be indifferent. There is a saying that "hatred can only make you black and blue, but the other person is unscathed." Don't let some emotion control you. Look to the future. There are so many beautiful things worth pursuing. Let it go once in a while
Dealing with interpersonal relationships will make your pursuit smoother. This also includes dealing with the relationship with things and people.
Dealing with the relationship with things, we should pay attention not to pursue some material enjoyment excessively, and being content with things is the normal state of life. If you get a little, you need to exchange your personality. Even if you get it, you won't be happy.
To handle the relationship with people well, we should keep in mind three sentences: "Look at people's strengths, help people's difficulties, and remember people's benefits."
Looking at people's strengths, as the saying goes, "no one is perfect without gold." Everyone has his own advantages and disadvantages. When interacting with people, we should learn to put ourselves in others' shoes and look at the problem from others' perspective, so as to better understand why other people's strengths and weaknesses exist.
At the same time, we must understand that only people can use it, and they can choose their talents. Flowers can decorate spring, and no light can represent everything.
Knowing how to get along with others can lead to harmony. Only when you know how to use your talents can you achieve something.
Everyone has difficulties in helping others, and giving charcoal in the snow makes people feel warmer than icing on the cake. Maybe it's just a greeting and an encouragement, but it's worth a thousand words when needed.
Remember the benefits of people, we often say that a little kindness will be rewarded in spring. When we live in the world, we should always have a grateful heart. Remember to repay those who have helped you and treated you well. Remember the good of others, and there will be no troubles in life.
Of course, there are no fixed rules for the perfection of personality. All groping is based on one heart. It is enough to do something that is worthy of others and your own heart.
We don't need to be great, but please don't be a nuisance.
If you look at people with your eyes, you will be wrong. It is true to be a man with heart.
With the progress of society, talents from various industries are constantly emerging, and the competition people have to face is becoming more and more fierce. How to deal with interpersonal relationship has become a sensitive topic.
First, we should know that what society needs first is people with real talents and practical learning. In other words, first of all, we must have a high level of business and be able to create wealth for enterprises and society. If you just meet people and complain that you are lazy, you can't even get along with others on an equal footing, let alone expect to establish a good relationship with others.
Second, get along with people for three points. What three o'clock? It is to do things with seven components and leave three points for introspection. The key to evaluating whether a person can handle interpersonal relationships well depends on how the person handles anger. Use three points to introspect when you are angry. What should you reflect on? Only look at the benefits and strengths of others! Anger is naturally resolved by inner strength.
Don't blame, don't complain, don't show off, be normal
The rapid development of society is accompanied by frequent division of labor and cooperation between people, and interpersonal relationships become more and more important. No one can exist alone, from international relations and national positions to business activities and personal trifles. In the final analysis, it is interpersonal behavior. In order to skillfully understand and master interpersonal relationships, the author lists the following keywords as encouragement.
Empathy. Psychology refers to the process and result of combing people's inner symbolic activities. Psychology is a subjective reflection of a person's treatment of things. Dealing with interpersonal relationships is to let the other person accept you psychologically. Empathy is the transformation of roles and perspectives. We can think about our words and deeds from the perspective of the other party or the third party, and explore the real psychological thoughts and needs of others, so as to adjust our words and deeds and get the recognition and acceptance of the other party, and the interpersonal relationship can develop well. For example, if you have a daughter, you want your in-laws to give more bride price. If you have a son, you don't think her in-laws will want too many colorful gifts. You have a daughter-in-law You think her daughter-in-law is too busy to understand. You have a daughter, and you want her to be in charge of her husband's family. You hate pedestrians when driving and cars when walking; I feel that my boss is too strong and stingy at work. When you become a boss, you feel that employees are too irresponsible and have no execution. You are a customer who thinks the business is too profiteering, and you are a businessman who thinks the customer is too picky. Think about it, not different views, but different positions. Empathy is to change your position and improve interpersonal relationships.
People are grouped. If you want to have a good interpersonal relationship, you must figure out what kind of people you want to make friends with and what kind of people you want to be. The people who live near Zhu Zhechi are black. Man is the most advanced social animal in nature. No matter the big environment or the small circle, it is because some * * * knowledge is linked together, and its * * * knowledge atmosphere will inevitably affect the people in the atmosphere. When you are with honest people, you will gain trust. With selfish people, you get betrayal; What kind of person you want to be, you must deal with what kind of people, integrate into this group, and have interpersonal relationships.
Communication frequency. Distant relatives are not as good as close neighbors because there is a gap in the frequency of interpersonal communication. The effective way to improve interpersonal relationship is to improve the appearance rate, and it would be better if you can be deeply remembered. Such as holidays, anniversaries, birthdays and other time nodes, we can make a phone call and send a message (as far as possible). If conditions permit, we can have dinner and chat together, which will inevitably increase our feelings and narrow our interpersonal distance. For distant friends, for friends who can't meet for years or even longer, we should also realize information exchange and express our concern for each other through various channels. This is a long-term investment in interpersonal communication, and there may be unexpected interpersonal gains. As the saying goes, it is not surprising to be polite to many people. One trick to increase communication frequency is to give gifts. The gift is not expensive, but it is suitable. Don't be rude when giving gifts. For rural villagers, if you give them antique calligraphy and painting, they may feel ridiculed and satirized. Sending Taobao A goods to people with status and status will definitely hurt self-esteem, which is tantamount to digging your own grave. Generally speaking, gifts should be clear, not inexplicable gifts, not confused gifts; The attitude of giving gifts should be sincere, not hypocritical or arrogant; The gift-giving place should be suitable, no embarrassing gifts, no abrupt gifts. Convenient for people. Everyone will encounter setbacks and difficulties, so we should do something timely as well as icing on the cake. When others are in trouble, people will feel a hundred times better if you lend a helping hand to friends you think are worthy of making friends. If you are the host, we can do whatever we want, try our best to meet the needs of the guests, ask them about their dining preferences and take them to the airport by our own car. If you are a guest, we will follow the principle of taking care of the guests, although the requirements are not high. When the work is done, the guests will be safe, and the problems they can solve will not cause too much trouble to others. These are small things, which can improve or destroy interpersonal relationships. Be careful.
Work is very important to people. When you do things, you must remember others first. In the process of interacting with strangers, we should first remember other people's names, positions, appearance characteristics, etc. Zhang Guan Dai Li shows that you don't pay enough attention to others, and it's hard to get their respect. The important task of doing things is to know people and make good use of them. The carrier of interpersonal communication is specific events. In our work and life, events such as task execution and scheme formulation are ultimately aimed at meeting people's needs. Therefore, in the process of considering events, we should first think from the perspective of participants and beneficiaries. For example, not every position in a football match uses the most capable person. If a midfielder's personal ability is outstanding, he can't connect well with defenders, forwards and other participants, and he can't form an overall joint force. Also, the purpose of the competition is to meet the victory expectations of the country, clubs and fans, and extravagant performances are not wise.
When people get along with each other, it is best that both sides are comfortable. How can we make each other and ourselves very comfortable?
The first thing is to understand each other's thoughts and purposes of interacting with themselves. This is crucial. If you can't do it, talk less and act less. Otherwise, it will lead to misunderstanding. There is also mutual respect, which is the premise. Everyone has a psychological need to be respected. If this demand is not met, it will lead to psychological defense and will not be open. Here we need to grasp a basic etiquette problem. Besides, thirdly, we should make things as simple as possible. Everyone likes to be frank and efficient, so if you know it, you should not beat around the bush. Fourth, focus on connecting feelings instead of rushing to achieve the immediate goal, which will naturally follow. Fifth, don't make communication vulgar. You don't have to drink while eating, you don't have to sing while drinking, and you can't arrange one program after another after singing. If it is really necessary, arrange something beneficial to health or edify your body and mind. In short, the simpler it is, the easier it is to be accepted.
It's obviously your fault, how can you blame me! ! ""joke, this is your mistake, and everyone knows it. If you don't believe me, we'll find someone to judge. "
Two colleagues had a quarrel over a work matter and went to a third party to judge.
They found Xiao Fang as the referee, and Xiao Fang pushed his eyes on the bridge of his nose and began to exercise the duties of the referee.
"I think you are both responsible for this matter, but then again, no one did it on purpose, so ..."
Before Xiao Fang's words were finished, two people left a sentence at the same time: "What's not easy to learn? Learn from others and mud. Who do you think you are? Or find someone else to judge. "
Xiao Fang's face was veiled: Did I say something wrong?
This kind of thing often happens in the workplace. Two colleagues had an argument. It doesn't matter if you resist. When you fought back, both sides pointed the finger at you, which made you very wronged.
If you don't know how to adjust contradictions, even if someone asks you to be a referee, you'd better say, "I really don't know this." In case both angry parties take it out on you.
Adjust contradictions, never learn from the aunt of the neighborhood Committee.
Some people, such as the aunt of the neighborhood Committee, think that there are three ways to adjust contradictions:
First: uphold a fair and just attitude and be impartial.
Number two: Clap your hands and be happy. You are both at fault. Even if you are not at all wrong, it is also wrong to have a conflict with others.
Third: since everyone is at fault, let's take a step back and reflect on ourselves.
Many people see that this routine is good and easy to learn, so they learn it now and buy it now.
But both sides of the argument often quit. "Who are you? What makes you say that about us! " Kindness is regarded as the liver and lungs of a donkey.
What should I do if I really want to mediate the contradictions between the two sides?
First of all, understand that identity is very important.
Every time I watch a boxing match, I sweat for the referee. Two giants, professional boxers, either of them can hit the referee caught between them.
Whenever two boxers get entangled, the referee has to squeeze in between them. What if the boxer loses his temper and hits the referee?
But I've never seen a boxer attack a referee.
This is because the rules of the game must listen to the referee. Whoever doesn't listen to the referee can't take part in the competition.
But if two people quarrel on the road, you go up and say, stop arguing, harmonious society, what are you arguing about?
See if both sides will spray you.
"Hey, no onions!" Hearing this, you may wish that there is a crack in the ground, and you can go in at once.
At this time, if it is a police uncle, wearing a uniform, give gifts to both sides of the quarrel. Do you think these two passers-by dare to spray the police?
Find the greatest common divisor
A taxi and a car are stuck at the intersection, and no one wants to make way for anyone.
The two sides fought, and both sides claimed that unless the other side made way first, they would rather block here and see who could resist who. You're stuck in the back. You can't get through.
At this time, you are in a hurry to go home. How do you mediate this contradiction and be a peacemaker? It's no use fighting with either side at this time.
You can run to the taxi driver and say: Of the two, you are a professional driver, so you should let me go first.
At this time, you put a professional hat on the other side, making him feel that he gave in first, not only not timid, but also more professional than the other side. The congestion has been lifted and you can go home smoothly.
If the taxi and the car were not stuck together, but two cars were stuck together, wouldn't the problem be solved? It can still be solved. There will always be a difference. You must find out the difference.
For example, if there are female drivers, male drivers should show gentlemanly manners. For example, are there any old people or children in the car? If there are old people and children, you should respect the old and love the young.
For another example, is there a difference between vehicles? Some cars have good reversing performance, so you should let them go first.
Any quarrel, unless both sides are determined to tear it to the end, must have a greatest common denominator.
What is the greatest common divisor? This is the result that both sides hope.
For example, in the traffic jam above, no one wants to be stuck here and can't go home.
For example, couples have a cold war, and no one wants to be cold all the time. For example, negotiations, negotiations broke down and no one was there.
With this greatest common denominator, since everyone wants a good result, we should find out the differences between the two sides and let the superior side give in, and many contradictions will naturally be solved.
The purpose of mediation is to help people solve problems.
Some people are honest and eager to help others solve contradictions, but in the end they are thankless. The key is to solve the problem.
When I was in college, my classmates were all brushing the TV series legend of mir. There is a plot in it: a soldier goes home to visit relatives and meets a scum man beating his wife on the way.
The soldier was very angry. How can a man hit a woman or even his wife? So he came forward and gave this love rat a good beating. But he didn't expect love rat's wife to be ungrateful.
Instead of being ungrateful, she pestered him and said, you hit my man, you can't leave so easily. Finally, the soldier was ordered to leave the army because of this incident.
When several students in our dormitory saw this, they all thought that this woman was too cheap to tell who was helping you and who was beating you. But in retrospect, the soldier was really impulsive.
When a husband beats his wife, you'd better go up and stop the violence. If you think that after hitting him, he won't dare to do this to his wife, it is undoubtedly naive.
You are a passerby. You hit her husband. If his wife applauds, after you leave, we will know with our fingers that her husband will take it out on her.
This woman is very clear, where is the crux of the problem? Beat up, Japanese is Japanese, but it won't solve the problem. If we really want to solve the problem, we must help this woman get divorced and leave this love rat.
Generally speaking, when we have a contradiction, we will go to the leader to solve the problem. In life, we will find people with prestige and ability to solve problems.
When you go to mediate between the two parties to the conflict, you should first think about whether I can help them solve this problem.
Finally, be more sincere and less routine.
The final solution of many contradictions is often that everyone puts aside contradictions and returns to the feelings between people. Many contradictions are nothing to everyone's feelings.
Mr. Zhang and Mr. Li run a medium-sized company with a clear division of labor.
Mr. Zhang is responsible for the company's overall strategy and foreign cooperation, Mr. Li is responsible for the company's daily operations, and Mr. Zhang is responsible for the company's human resources.
One day, general manager Zhang recruited a new employee for the company. This new employee has a special relationship with Mr. Zhang: she is an excellent graduate recommended by Mr. Zhang's university teacher.
Because Zhang had something to go out that day, he asked Zhao to arrange the entry of new employees. In the company's WeChat group, everyone is welcoming the arrival of new employees, and General Li specially sent her a big red envelope.
At that time, the atmosphere in the group was particularly good. At this time, I unconsciously said: This is General Zhang's sister, please take care of her in the future. This can make manager Li angry.
He spoke directly in the company's senior management group: if everyone who comes in later claims to have something to do with the leader, is anyone still working?
Zhao Zong is not to be outdone: the new employee is the leader's sister, and I think this is a kind of pressure on her to work hard in the future. Besides, it's a small matter. As for going online like this?
The war between the two sides is imminent. At this time, General Zhang saw it and said leisurely in the group: Stop arguing, everyone. I know you are all doing it for the good of the company.
Both Li He and Li He are smart people. After reading this sentence, I am not happy. Same routine again. It is a thousand-year-old fox. What serial are you playing?
Manager Zhang apologized immediately when he saw that the routine didn't work. To be honest, it's my fault. I'm the root of the problem.
I recruited the person. I have something to do when I go out today. Please ask Manager Li to introduce me to her work. Mr. Li, please rest assured that I have confidence in the new employees and I will bear whatever happens.
Since someone on both sides came out to apologize sincerely, it would hurt the harmony to pursue it again. So everyone gave each other red envelopes, and this page has just been opened.
Bian Xiao, let's talk about myself in recent years. When I was in college, I didn't need to mention it because I was a fellow villager in a dormitory. Up to now, our relationship is iron and iron, and it is impossible to say that there is no friction, but boys quarrel today, and even if they quarrel again the next day, they will be reconciled. After all, no one is worried about anyone. We have the same money to eat together and go to the supermarket. This is why it is difficult for us to lend a helping hand when we are in trouble.
Graduation is just around the corner, and we all go our separate ways. I still remember dragging my suitcase in the morning without greeting too many people, because I didn't want to be too sad and fragile when I was about to enter the society, so I had to work hard and be strong, because no one could help me in the future, so I had to work hard.
On the first day, as a rookie, I really didn't even dare to breathe in the company. I seldom say two words a day. The most important thing is to say all the technical terms. I don't understand them at all. I gradually realized that as a novice in the workplace, don't be afraid, don't ask boldly, and don't be shy, because as long as you overcome your current fears, you can make faster progress and learn more.
When you have 2-3 years of workplace experience, you may have made some achievements, or you may be the management of a company, so you need to do more things, not only to do your own job well, but also to do some extra work that has little to do with yourself, such as the entry, training and experience talk of new people. Especially as a management, you need to communicate with employees and understand the psychology of new employees. Heart-to-heart conversation is mutual.
Extensive interpersonal relationships are not only work, but also life. When I first graduated, I experienced many twists and turns when talking about marriage, but we must remember that there are no parents who don't love their children, and there are no children who don't love their parents. No other partner in the world dares to be with you for no reason. Sincerity is very important. Families in Bian Xiao generally don't. Three brothers, this is something that many families care about. But at last, I finally got my wife. This is not to say that Bian Xiao is so powerful and awesome. It's all nonsense. The key is to see if I can hold up the scene at a critical moment. This is my first marriage, facing many situations, but Bian Xiao knows one thing. Everything in the world is reasonable. You can't be nice to others. It's just a matter of time. I talked with my present father-in-law in the car for two hours, and finally he agreed. I didn't do it on my own. I just think that sometimes it is easier to talk between two people than between a group of people. Too many people will be chaotic and troublesome. It takes courage and sincerity. Being sincere with others is the key to each other. Get along with others for a long time, and people will see if you are trustworthy. I talked with my wife for eight years. It is a blessing for a woman to be with you for so long. Don't blame the cruelty of reality.
No matter what you do, whether it is work or life, you should look at the problem from the other side's point of view. Be more sincere and less intrigue, and you will find your life very easy. So I don't have much trouble now. I will also stay away from those who make a mess of your life every day. I don't want to affect my mood and life because others are unhappy. My life is already beautiful, so there is no need to reinvent the wheel.
Try to improve your own value, do your own thing well, treat others sincerely, and do things with your heart, and you will have a very relaxed life. Yan Xiaoxian made a bird's nest by heart. Zhong Wei Hao sou Xiao Yan xian cubilose
When it comes to interpersonal relationships, maybe all of us will feel that interpersonal relationships are quite simple to some extent. Indeed, most people think that interpersonal relationship is just who has a good relationship with themselves! But how to deal with interpersonal relationship is a headache. First of all, treat others as you want them to treat you. Because human nature is interlinked, if you hate someone especially, I think that person will feel something. Under normal circumstances, people tend to do the same thing with each other. China always pays off. Without much interest, what you do will often get the same effect, just as you reach out and shake hands with others, others are often happy to do so. Today's society is more realistic. If there is no intersection, people often don't communicate with each other. How heavy everyone's mood is, the average person's circle is relatively small, influenced by the surrounding environment. After a long time, everyone has become a special reality, and people's psychology is inclined to take and unwilling to pay. But everyone wants to be with people who are willing to pay. In fact, people who pay often get more and happier. Not necessarily how to pay. Learn to make constant efforts with friends in daily life, such as listening and thinking from the perspective of others. Your interpersonal relationship will be greatly improved and your life will be easier. I have a favorite saying that the only way to gain the respect of others is to learn to respect others first. Respect for others is a virtue advocated by Chinese culture for five thousand years. Self-esteem is an internal emotion that everyone has and is very important to everyone. The previous feelings between people were mutual, and only by learning to respect others can we gain their respect. A person who knows how to respect others will often be praised and recognized by people. Therefore, in order to better survive in society or the workplace, respect for others will inevitably become the first principle of life and the basis for a foothold in the workplace. But don't make friends on purpose. Many things, in fact, let nature take its course, just like making friends, that's all. Whether we can continue our relationship is actually natural. If you try to please each other, you will actually get disapproval and contempt from each other. It is better to make friends naturally. But also know how to communicate. Good communication and expression skills are essential qualities for a happy life and a successful career. According to relevant statistics, more than 80% of the problems we encounter are caused by poor communication. I think each of us will deeply feel that our inaccurate expression and poor communication have brought us too many problems that plague us. So it is necessary for us to spend some time practicing our communication skills every day. For example, we should not only listen to what others say on the surface, but also understand what others want to express, so as to improve our self-worth! So as to better handle interpersonal relationships!
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