How to write a funny New Year's notice

1. Being your friend for so long, you have always cared about me, but I often give you trouble. I really don't know how to repay you ... so ... I will be a cow and a horse in my next life ... and I will definitely pull up weeds for you to eat. ...

I miss you very much, but I am embarrassed to call you. I'm afraid you're busy, you ignore me, you think I'm harassing me, and I'd like to contact you, but ... the phone bill is really expensive. Please call me! Old guerrilla

If you are a meteor, I will chase you. If you are a satellite, I will wait for you. If you were a star, I would fall in love with you. Unfortunately ... you are an orangutan ~ I can only see you in the zoo! ! Oh, what a pity! !

4. Now I'm in a mess ... I don't know what I'm thinking ... My mind is getting bored ... I really don't know what to do ... Can you tell me ... I really don't know whether to eat Regan Noodles or Ah Q bucket noodles! Old guerrilla

Thank you for being with me when I was most frustrated and helping me when I needed help most. I just want to tell you, "nothing good has happened since I met you!" " You are a loser! "-the old guerrillas

6. I'm sorry for texting you so late ~ ~ If it bothers you ~ ~ I'm here to say ~ ~ You deserve it ~ ~ Who told you to go to bed earlier than me ~ ~ Hehe! !

7. Meeting you is the beginning of my inner desire to fall in love with you ~ Having you is my happy choice ~ Stepping on the red carpet is my most precious wealth ~ Loving you forever is my eternal motivation ~ Unfortunately, I passed it on to the wrong person.

8. Hello, this is the Bra Inspection Bureau. We have found that your breasts have violated Article 7 of Chapter 2 of the "Cup Control Law" "Regulations on Severe and Extremely sagging breasts"! So we must force you to get breast implants, or you will be wanted!

9. Because of you, I believe that maybe all this is predestined and brings us together. Now I really want to say … what I did in my last life!

10. Starting from tomorrow, the city has decided to drive away all the mentally retarded young people who are ugly and detrimental to the city! Hurry up and pack your things, go out and take shelter, and don't tell anyone that I informed you, remember! You're welcome.

1 1. God saw your desire and created water; God saw that you were hungry and created rice. God saw that you had no lovely friends and created me; However, he also saw that there is no idiot in this world and created you by the way.

12. If it is stipulated that a person can only be kind to one person in his life, I would rather that person be you. I have no regrets and will never change! But there are no rules ... then forget it!

13. It is a happy thing to miss you! Nice to meet you! Loving you is what I will always do! Keeping you in mind is what I have been doing! But I lied to you, and it just happened! Ha ha!

14. The phone is ringing, which means I am thinking of you! Two voices mean I like you! Three voices mean I love you! When the seventh sound rings … damn it, I really need to talk to you, so don't answer the phone!

15. According to statistics, more than 99.9% people who look like pig heads use thumb buttons to read short messages! Hey, hey, don't change hands, it's too late. Pig head! hahaha

16. I wrote your name in the sky, but the wind blew it away; I wrote your name on the beach, but it was washed away by the sea; I wrote your name in every corner … fuck, I was taken away by the police!

17. If it's a mistake to look good … then I'm all wet. If loveliness is a crime … I have committed a heinous crime. It's hard to be a man! ... you'll be fine ~ Yes, you're not guilty ... I envy you.

18. When the white clouds float by, it is the trace that I miss you; When the sun shines, that's my miss for you; When it rains, it is proof that I miss you; When it thundered, that's when I prayed to heaven that you were hit ... haha-

19. If I burn incense for one year, I can meet you, I can know you for three years, and I can cherish you for ten years. For the happiness of my next life, I am willing to ... convert to Christianity.

Supplement:

1 .. I was thinking about you, you know?

I'm paging you, you know?

I love you very much, you know?

I sent it wrong, you know? 2. When the white clouds pass by, it is the trace of my missing you;

When the sun shines, that's my miss for you;

When it rains, it is proof that I miss you;

When it thundered, I prayed to heaven that you were hit ... haha 3. I am willing to wait under the starry sky until a star is moved by me, breaking the silence of the night sky for me, full of my wishes and falling on your sleeping pillow to hit you! According to the research of Massachusetts Institute of Technology, soaking the mobile phone in water 1 minute before making a phone call can completely avoid the radiation of electromagnetic waves to the human brain, remember! Your mobile phone has been infected with HIV. For the sake of safety, please put on a mask, gloves and condoms, and give you a gift with the heaviest amount of feces since taking a shit. You will definitely eat a catty and pack more. If you feel that the amount of feces is not enough, please help yourself! Happy new year! Starting today, please call 1 10 for free to win a 9-day value-added tour of the detention center. Now call to send gifts such as posters of young people and dangerous people. God saw that you were thirsty, so he created water. God saw that you were hungry, so he created rice. God saw that you had no lovely friends, so he created me. At the same time, God found that there is no fool in this world and created you by the way. On mouse's birthday, he boasted that there would be guests. On the birthday, others laughed at it as a bat, but the mouse proudly said that at least it was a stewardess. There is a tacit understanding, a wonderful feeling, a happiness to accompany you, a longing to see, and an idiot who has read the news. Congratulations! Your mobile phone has passed the upgrade test. Please put it on the chopping board and hit it with a sledgehammer three times to upgrade! Your underwear is similar to bin Laden's, and the American target has been locked! Please take it off and throw it into the water, streaking ten kilometers away! Enough ~ \ (≧ ▽ ≦)/~ Five Christmas prohibitions: no pretending to be busy at work, no forgetting me when you get rich, no not helping me when you are in trouble, no eating chocolate and no calling me! Don't think about me when you are free! Hope to carry it out seriously ... 5 ... I said: will the idiot receive my message and not finish reading it? Idiot said: no! 26. I quietly blindfolded you, gently put a banana peel under your feet and looked at it gently. ...