Funny jokes with pictures in friends circle (3)

Funny jokes with pictures in the circle of friends. 1. May you have wine, meat and girls in the future, and girls are ugly.

2. I warn you, when I'm unhappy, don't smirk at me, because I want to laugh when you smile, and I'm embarrassed, you know.

3. Someone told me that people in Fujian can't distinguish HF, so I slapped him when I went up. Why not get married?

4. Five principles of summer vacation: 1. Don't ask me about my grades. 2, don't ask about my grades. 3. Don't show off your achievements to me. 4. Don't pretend to be modest in front of me. 5, don't take the results that others can't touch and cry and say that you didn't do well in the exam. Thank you for your cooperation.

5. My buddy! He studied as a nurse in college and went to school to report that he entered their class that day. The scene was simply terrible. All 8 students, 79 women, so he became the flower of his class. Sometimes drinking together often laughs at his huge harem! Until he came back to the classroom with a black face after being beaten outside, the whole class was boiling! So after class, I was surrounded by 79 girls and went out to find a venue! Can you imagine a man with a black face and a group of women fighting? Seventy-nine girls beat eight boys, and that scene made the gods cry! From then on, we will never laugh at him again. This TM is a man's dream!

6. quarreling with my girlfriend, she turned to leave in anger, and I immediately yelled: Face, stop! ? She's all confused:? Long legs, you have the guts to say it again. I'll say it again. What's wrong? Water snake waist! ? You're not human, ABS man! ?

7. Your cheeks are reddish, like a pig's head swaying in the wind.

8. Save water, please take a bath together.

9. Friends, there are three advantages to taking her swimming before confirming that she becomes your girlfriend. 1, look at the figure, there are not too many clothes, and you can't hide it! 2, look at Su Yan, in the water, any concealer and foundation cream will no longer exist. 3. When she learns to swim, she won't ask, who did you save first when your mother fell into the water with me?

1. Every night, I go home by subway, but every time I take the subway, I feel extremely heartbroken, lamenting the quality of Chinese people. Every time someone makes a loud phone call, they don't hide it, and some people play pop songs and revel in it. The most hateful thing is that there are couples who are affectionate like nobody's watching, completely ignoring our feelings in single dog. Seeing this, how can I eat my stinky tofu! A funny joke that makes people laugh.

11. Many people ask, how do you choose to give you 1 million yuan to betray your best friend? For 1 million yuan, I still choose my friends, all of whom grew up naked. After so many years, Pony, Brother Jian Lin and Uncle Gates have forgotten to make friends, so we can't let the copper smell tarnish our friendship!

12. Several people were in the golf locker room. A cell phone rang for a long time, and a man pressed the hands-free button. Woman: Honey, are you in the club? M: Yes. Woman: I saw a BMW for less than 2 million. Man: Buy. Woman: And that property has been put on the market again, 6, yuan. M: Yes. Woman: I love you so much. Man: I love you, too. The man next to him was dumbfounded with admiration. The man hung up the phone and asked, Whose mobile phone is this?

13. The kidnapper called:? I have your wife, and I will collect 1 million in 24 hours, or I will kill the ticket. ? Husband:? No problem with the money, but can I give it to you a few days later? Robber:? Why? Husband:? I want to be quiet for a few days. ?

14. My colleague coughed and mistakenly took the medicine as a cough medicine. At noon, I saw this cargo loudly say: This medicine is so fucking effective. Cough and pull my pants. I dare not cough now. ?

15. During military training, the whole grade was in a playground, and the place was tight. In order to find a suitable place, our instructor called us to turn left for a while, turn left later and turn right for a while. Busy for a long time, my classmate couldn't bear to say: Are you playing snake?

16. I heard that girls wearing bras to sleep will affect their chest development, so I personally took off my deskmate's bra in math class today. I'm doing this for her own good. I wonder why she hit me. Hehe, you deserve to be flat-chested all your life!

17. Teach everyone a new skill. If you don't feel full when you go out to eat, you can eat more than half, and then turn around and go out. After a while, the waiter will take away your bowl, and then you can go back and ask about your food, and then cycle endlessly until you are full?

18. Sometimes there must be something in life, and it really annoys me all the time.

19. Did Moon always use my red thread to knit long pants?

Funny jokes with pictures in the circle of friends

1. I hope all girls can marry love, and I will marry He Yichen.

2. When I was fat, I didn't dislike people who were kind to me. I took a small notebook and wrote it down. I will definitely repay you when I lose weight.

3. You must find two types of wives, one is my type, and the other is my type.

4. When I was born, God asked me whether I should have a good memory or be beautiful. I have forgotten what I answered at that time.

5. since? Grass? The word is gradually abbreviated as? Hey? After that, I became more and more unable to look straight? Smile? This idiom is gone!

6. I received the most precious birthday present in my life, probably because my mother gave me a life on my first birthday, and I still use it.

7. My parents have been married for so many years, and they are always cheating on each other. Isn't that the day my mother said to my father? Look at what your son looks like. ? My father was dissatisfied at that time and sneered. Hehe, your son is no better there, just like a monkey. ?

8. I dated my ex for three years, and one day he suddenly broke up on the grounds that he fell in love with someone else, so I cried. I fell in love with someone else and didn't break up with him. How could he!

9. I accidentally left my mobile phone in the taxi, but fortunately, the driver's master actually unlocked it and called my friend to inform me to get it back. I asked the driver: I unlocked it by face recognition. How did you open it? The driver said:? I just opened the poster of Roy. ?

1. One day when I was not very busy, a buddy asked me to help me write the wedding invitation. I've been writing for a long time, and I feel a little wrong, but I can't see what's wrong even if I look at it. At this time, my brother's daughter-in-law came over to look at it and said:? Can you change the groom's name? It's impossible for us. . Me. . .

11. I'll suit you if I'm not acclimatized.

12. In the dark and windy night, a woman was walking alone on the road. Suddenly, a strange man stood in front of her with a dagger. The woman trembled with fear, but she listened to the man's speech politely: Sister, can you give me some money? Have pity on me, a poor man who has no job and is hungry! You see, my only property now is this dagger! ?

13. My girlfriend sent a photo of eating lunch on WeChat. I asked with concern: Do you eat steamed bread at noon? Girlfriend: Nonsense, people eat steamed buns. Me: steamed buns? How come there are no wrinkles? ! She: I took it with beauty, and the wrinkles are gone!

14. My friend went to KFC to buy hamburgers, and told the waiter that he didn't want salad, so he took two pieces of garlic and put them in it. The waiter said he didn't, but he said he did. Then he took a few out of his pocket, and all of them were petrified!

15. What can I give you? You don't lack anything. I'd better send you away. Attractive humor space. Talk about it.

16. As we all know, children usually cry and make noise when they have injections. But I have seen a wonderful flower being pressed by doctors and nurses on the hospital bed, shouting: Hey, what are you doing? Why are you still doing it? Let go of me, beast. Beast?

　17.? Mom, don't worry, you have to believe that there will always be someone waiting for me. ? Lord Yan?

18. A female netizen said to send me a photo of a real person, and I was so excited that I clicked on it. Damn it, it's Zhang Sanfeng.

　19.? What is the most local behavior you have unintentionally done? I always thought that the charging treasure was disposable. How many have I thrown away?

2. I helped my friend, and he said: Thank you, I'll treat you to dinner another day! ? I waved my hand and said, You're welcome. You've been spending a lot recently. Save it. It's better if I treat you. ? I don't want him to take out his cell phone and say, What day? I'll make a memo so that I can be prepared. ? Damn it, I don't play cards according to the routine ~ > > > More exciting next page? Pictures of funny paragraphs in friends circle?