Vague and funny jokes

With the development of communication, jokes have become popular. On buses and subways, you will find many ordinary people watching jokes with mobile phones in their hands. This environment has also promoted the rapid development of Duan Zi. The following is my ambiguous humor, I hope I can like you!

A series of ambiguous and funny jokes

When a husband is on a business trip, a good wife gives him a pack of condoms: if you can't help it outside, remember to wear a condom. My husband said excitedly, I still use theirs because my family is not well off!

I went to the hospital to see my friends yesterday. It is said that he was beaten. He told me that he got it while playing SM with GF. I'm curious. Didn't you tie her up? Besides, why did SM have a concussion? The question almost made me laugh. "Grass, I just tied her up, took off my clothes and was about to get down to business when her dad pushed the door and came in! What is worse? Her mouth is blocked? Her father is a soldier, so he won't say anything about picking up stools! "

A girl came to class to introduce herself: "I may not be the smartest, I may not be the most beautiful, I may not be the best-I may not be the most humorous." Just as all her classmates praised her modesty, she suddenly said, "Hello, my name is Wei. .

Funny paragraph recommendation

Boy: "Teacher, let me ask you a question. Three ladies each bought a banana, and three people ate bananas in three ways, licking, biting and eating. Which one do you think is married? " The female teacher thought for a while, blushed and replied, "It should be the one with food." "No, the one with the ring, but I like your idea."

Sun Jia is happy to have a baby, and the husband and wife discuss: Sun Jia is very big in Zhongshan, so let's call it Zhongshan! The police station disagreed. The husband and wife were furious: they must take a name twice as big as Sun Yat-sen's cow! The policeman sneered. The couple went home dripping with water and repeatedly compared their choices. Three days later, I went to the house again. The policeman took the name and looked at it. I froze for a long time, unable to speak. It says: Sun Chuanchu!

Primary school: "If you don't study hard, you won't be admitted to junior high school in the future." Junior high school: "If you don't study hard, you won't be admitted to senior high school in the future." High school: "If you don't study hard, you won't be admitted to the university in the future." University: "If you don't study hard, you won't find a job in the future." Work: "Are you too busy studying at school?

The latest ambiguity and funny.

Today, I went to a beautiful classmate page and found one of her diaries. She is lovelorn. Time, month, I was ecstatic, and the opportunity finally came. Then I saw the photos she uploaded, that month, with her new boyfriend. . .

A couple, because of female anemia, gave a large number of blood transfusions to women. After breaking up, the man asked the woman blood out. In a rage, the female ninja took out a sanitary towel from below and threw it to the man, saying, "Here you are, this is the down payment, and I will repay it monthly!" "

Yesterday, the unit unified the donation to the disaster area and deducted it directly from the salary. I felt depressed and posted a post on the internet after I got home, "I was forced to donate money today." The more I read it, the more wrong it becomes. A closer look reveals that it is "I was forced to donate money today". MD can't get married!

In class, the teacher inspired a student when teaching the word "quilt": What's on your bed? "There are sheets," the student replied. "What's on the sheets?" The teacher also inspired students with my mother to answer, "What's on your mother?" The teacher asked "There is my father". "Then what's on your father?" "My mother" and "Where's the quilt?" The teacher said angrily, "The quilt fell to the ground." The students complained.