I broke up with you. Why am I so sad?

I was born in a medium-sized city in the east. I haven't found a suitable partner because of introversion or work.

I met him through one of my websites, which was one day in 10 last year. Ironically, the reason why we are now is because of what happened that day. I still remember that day. It was a Sunday after the National Day. That day, I received a phone call from a net friend. He asked me if I had a boyfriend now, and I said no. She said that she wanted to introduce me to a boy from the northeast. In the same year as me, I was responsible for machine maintenance in the production department of their company. Although I felt that the conditions were not very good at that time, I was emotionally in a gap and felt that it would be good to have another chance. So I made an agreement with her to give my mobile phone number to her colleagues. I got a message after I hung up on him. I also know who it is. He introduced himself. After that, we talked a lot, which was quite speculative. After that, we made a phone call and got through to him. This is my favorite Northeast dialect. I feel very comfortable. I like the Northeast dialect for a long time, so when I really talk to the Northeast people, I feel very cordial. He talked a lot, and I mainly listened. He told me about his past. Before he came here, he went to many cities for work reasons. He told me about the places he had been and the local customs. What he said attracted me, so I felt good about him. After that, we often contacted and talked a lot, but at that time I didn't regard him as an ideal object. We were just ordinary friends. After knowing each other for more than a year, my friend introduced me to a local young man. After comparison, I chose a local boy. I told this decision to the northeast guy. He didn't say much, and then we didn't contact. But my communication with the local boy was not smooth, and I had no feelings for him at all. His life circle is completely different from mine, and I don't have the same topic While hesitating, Christmas came. That day, boys in Northeast China sent me a program blessing message. I have a habit. I always reply to messages sent by others, so I sent him one, so we got in touch again. I told him all my puzzles and troubles, and he also expressed his views. During that time, I only regarded him as a friend, with no other meaning, but I have to admit that his thoughts influenced my decision. Naturally, I finally decided to break up with that local boy.

We just found out that the breakup was about one year and fifteen days. In the first half of the year, we seldom met. Although we are in the same city, I am in the north, he is in the south, and we are all in the suburbs. He has a single break, and I have a double break. There are not many opportunities to really meet, but this does not affect our feelings. Moreover, once I asked him if he decided to stay and buy a house, and he agreed. So our relationship is still good, but there are too few opportunities for us to meet, so I cherish the opportunity for us to meet. Therefore, we had the first quarrel and the cold war. It was a day in June, and he had made an appointment with me to meet on Saturday that week. But on Friday, he suddenly said he couldn't meet, saying that the company's production task was too tight to rest, but he also told me before that he couldn't take time off, but then he asked the factory director for leave and approved it, and suddenly said no, so. I sent him a short message, the general content is as follows: I hope you can seriously consider whether you really decide to stay. Life in the south is much more stressful than in the northeast, and once you decide to stay and buy a house, it will be very troublesome to regret it. Besides, you are so far away from home, are you really willing to leave your parents? I sent him this message, but he didn't reply. I was very angry. I told him that we shouldn't contact each other this week. I didn't expect him to take it seriously He really didn't contact me again. In fact, I really wanted to contact him, but I couldn't keep my head down, so I finally held back. After a week, he contacted me. Why did this week pass? I said, I, later I told him that what I said was not true, and he didn't reply. I didn't explain it again. I want to give each other some time! So we haven't contacted each other for several days, and I have carefully considered the problems between me and him. I think he and I really have different views on some things, and I don't want to be forced. Although I didn't want to be separated from this relationship, I didn't want to bow my head first, so I sent him a short message. I want to return the things he bought for me and my parents during this time, and I will exchange the money he spent on me for cash. He replied that it was unnecessary, and I told him that it was unnecessary. I'll handle it myself. I want to give him something. Actually, I want to see him one last time, hoping to make some things clear. Besides, I put the money on his mobile phone card. I recharged his mobile phone after work that day. When I got home, I didn't hear his phone at first. When I saw it later, I was still hesitant to call him back. Later, I considered calling him just to tell him if I could explain my doubts. I couldn't end it so vaguely, so I called back. At first, I really didn't know how to say it. Later, I felt that things had reached this point. What else can't I say? So I told him everything I wanted to say. I asked him that he didn't make this decision because of the last thing, and the decision to break up was not made that day. Then why didn't you tell me earlier? If you had told me earlier, you wouldn't have introduced me to my parents. We are still friends, but he didn't answer all my questions. I kept asking him. He said that after reading what I sent him to think carefully about whether he really stayed, I had the idea of breaking up, but he said it in advance. I was surprised to hear his words. I didn't expect him to understand this message in this way. Knowing what he thought, I told him that the message was really my idea, but it wasn't that I wanted to break up, but I wanted him to think it over. I don't want him to regret this decision in the future. After all, this decision will affect his life. When we all express our thoughts, we understand that we have misunderstood each other's meaning, mainly because he misunderstood mine, so we have made an appointment to communicate more in the future so as to get to know each other better.

After reconciliation, our relationship developed quickly and well, and getting married and buying a house was naturally put on the agenda. In July, under the pressure of family, I asked him if he could buy a house first. After all, marriage needs a house, and he agreed. He said that he hoped to buy it near my home, so that his life would be convenient in the future, because he had few days off and was not familiar with the geographical environment of my home. He wanted me to go and see it first, saying that as long as I took a fancy to it, but. But I went to see it first. Not for a while. After more than a month, one day he told me that he had called home. Because he has no time, he has called his mother. First, I want to formally meet my parents to talk about marriage. Besides, I want to settle the house. I think so, too. I've known him for so long, but I haven't met his parents. I was too busy to go before. This time, since his mother came there to meet and take her to play, I haven't seen the house again, so more than a month has passed. I asked about it when I met her. He explained that his mother was going to book a train ticket, but his brother burned his hand at work, which seemed quite serious and needed surgery. His brother is married. His brother-in-law was at home with the children, but now. Nobody takes care of the children, so I have to fucking take care of myself. I felt so coincidental when I heard him say this, but I think no one should take the fact that his family is sick as an excuse! So despite my doubts, I believed him. In this way, more than two months have passed. In the meantime, I asked him if he could look at the house first, because his mother wouldn't stay long even if she came, and it would take time to choose a house. Let's take a look first. If we like it, let his mother come over. Actually, I have another idea in my heart. I think something is wrong. Since I decided to buy a house, there have been frequent situations, one after another. What a coincidence! I want to find out the truth as soon as possible. If he decides to buy a house, it means that my suspicion is wrong, but I think too much. So as soon as I have time, I will go to the agency to see if there is a suitable house.

It was mid-October, and finally one day I took a fancy to a house. I called him and told him that he would come to see him on Saturday. He saw me that day and told me a news that his mother took the real estate license of her hometown to the bank to apply for a mortgage loan for a classmate who was doing credit, saying that her mother decided to apply for a loan in her hometown, saying that this would help us pay interest and reduce the burden. I was surprised. I said I never wanted them to help us with the loan, let alone help us pay the interest. I told him that it would be nice if his family could help us with the down payment. Now that the house price is so high, I'm embarrassed to take so much money. How can we get them to help us pay interest again? Besides, he has a younger brother. What would his brother think if he knew these things? This is a great event. I don't know what it will be like. I told him not to do this. He said to call home at night. He was satisfied with the house, but when he talked about the loan, he said that he would go home at night to discuss it with his family. I am very happy after seeing the house. I thought everything would be fine, the house could be settled and the next thing could be done. I thought everything would be fine and I was looking forward to a bright future, but the next day, his short message completely sent me from heaven to hell. He told me that he called home yesterday. But his father refused to buy a house and asked him to go back to his hometown. When I saw this news, I was at a loss. My brain is blank. I didn't reply to his message. He called me after eight o'clock in the evening. He said he was in pain and he was caught in the middle. He couldn't drink white wine, but he was bored, so he went out for a drink with his colleagues. I can't tell him how sad he is, so the next day he sent me a message saying that he was in too much pain last night and he cried. He also said that no matter how his family objected, he would not leave me, and he would stay. But when I saw the news, my tears could not help falling. I was at work at that time, and I tried my best to hold back my tears, but I couldn't stop. I feel sorry for him and myself. I am very stable to see him so sad. He can say to stay, but I can't be too selfish. He should let him choose. I sent him a text message. I said I would give you one last chance to choose. It's up to you to stay or not. Of course I don't want you to leave me, but I don't want you to be so miserable. Your life should be your choice. No matter how you choose, I won't blame you. I don't want you to regret your choice in the future, and I don't want you to face the pain of losing your parents because you chose me. He texted back and said that he would never leave.

In the midst of pain and contradiction, time goes on. We met a week after the incident, and our mood was somewhat stable. I asked him what was going on. Buying a house was not decided today, but we decided in July. Why did your father say that? He didn't say why that day. Later, when I kept asking, he told me that his father had always taken a fancy to the daughter of one of his comrades when he was in his hometown. I wanted the girl to be his wife, but neither he nor his mother agreed, so he decided to stay and prepare to buy a house. His father knows nothing about it. This time, because his mother wanted to use the owner's card as collateral, the owner's name was his father's and he needed his ID card, so his father knew about it. I was confused by what he said. How did this happen? It was completely out of my expectation.

Since I know what happened, I think he really kept it from me for too long. I thought about what happened before and after. I don't think his explanation can completely convince me, and I still have doubts. So I looked at his cell phone records, and I knew I had done something wrong, but I was really in a mess. I don't know if he told me the truth, so I still said that although I did something wrong, I don't regret my behavior, because.

That night, I looked at his phone records. I found that he didn't call home or make a long distance call on the night of the house inspection. I feel very serious. If he didn't call home that night, what happened after that can only mean one thing. It's all a scam he directed and performed. I immediately called him to tell him what I found. I also know that this will tell him that I have read his phone records privately, but I think my findings are more important. When I asked him why his phone records didn't show that he called home that night, he said yes. Then I asked him why the phone records didn't show, but he still insisted on calling. I am obviously aware of his lack of confidence. I know this is obvious, so I don't need to say anything more. I know I told him the result after reading his phone records, but I still can't break up with him, because I have fallen in love with him, and I believe he must have some difficulties, so I emailed him what I wanted to say, but he didn't reply, so I couldn't help calling him and telling him the contents of the email. I believe he has difficulties, but he can tell me that I am willing to solve them with him, and he says he is willing. I said yes, I will give you time, but I hope you can solve it as soon as possible.

Although I said to give him time, I really wanted to know what caused us to do this, so I couldn't help asking him, but he refused to say. Moreover, since that incident, our relationship has reached the bottom, and making phone calls is not as natural as before. With the gap, I know that things can't be delayed any longer, otherwise it will only get worse and worse, so one day, I made an appointment with him near their company. I told him I had something to say to him. In fact, I have decided to break up with him because I don't think he trusts me very much. But when I saw him, I couldn't say goodbye. I asked him if he had anything to say. I told him clearly that there was something wrong with his feelings. I hope he can speak his mind, even if he is dissatisfied with me, but he didn't say anything. How can I know you? Your home is so far away that all I know about you is what you said. How can I know you if you don't want to say what you think? He asked me if I really wanted to know that. I told him it was me. I want to know how serious this matter affecting our relationship is, so serious that you don't want to talk about it when our relationship is about to break down. He said he would tell me in the evening, so we ended the conversation. He didn't call me at night. The next day, he told me that my mobile phone was broken and I went to buy it at night, but he still didn't call me that night. I was angry and felt. So I sent him a message that night, telling him that I always wanted to know the truth, not that I didn't trust him, but that I just wanted to increase my trust in him, because too many things happened before, but I didn't want to regret this relationship when I was old, because I didn't work hard enough and missed a beautiful marriage. Since you really don't want to talk about it, I won't ask again. I don't regret this feeling, because we all have. A day later, he sent me a short message telling me that the real reason he came here was that he had an accident while driving outside. Although it was handled at that time, now the other party has found his home because of the compensation problem, so everything that happened later will happen. Knowing the truth of the matter, I think I can understand why he refused to say it, but I can't forgive his concealment. I have known him for a year. Don't tell me when there is no definite relationship, but always tell me when we decide to get married and buy a house! Why do I have to tell me when I am happy to buy a house? I told him that I wanted to marry him wholeheartedly. If he had told me earlier, things would not have come to this. I told him that the house is very important to me, but the house is not all. What I value is his sincerity to me, and I will marry him even if I don't have a house. If he had told me earlier, I would have lived with him without a house. I told him that I still like him, but there is no fate between husband and wife, and we can only be friends in the future.

Once something is missed, there is no turning back, just like me and him. At first I wanted to marry him, but now I can't marry him even if I want to, because the feeling has changed and there is no trust between us. Even if we get married, the same thing will happen again. Feelings are like a mirror, broken, no matter how good the craftsman repairs it, there will be cracks. This is a story between me and him.