Do wechat messages need seconds to return?

In a program, in the previous emotional experience, the male guest had a contradiction with the other half on the question of returning information in seconds. So do you think it's wrong not to return to WeChat for a second?

First of all, WeChat is a communication tool. Usually, we don't always hold a mobile phone on WeChat, and when we see the information, we will return in seconds. Everyone has his own things or work to do. Therefore, when we send WeChat, we should understand that the reply can wait and then choose such a communication method. Otherwise, call to communicate.

Secondly, as an instant messaging tool, WeChat can send messages at any time. For example, lovers say something bold just after quarreling. If they come back in a second, they will be very anxious and more likely to intensify contradictions. If we can wait for the intense emotions to ease down and then communicate realistically, we can solve the problem better.

In the program, the male guest has such a passage. The most unforgettable love, the most quarrelsome question is, why didn't I reply to her message every second? She even blamed me. If she could answer back, she wouldn't talk to others. I don't understand. Is it really that important? Is it really necessary for couples to report at all times? In my opinion, the feelings maintained by WeChat are naive.

In love, the two sides will have a strong attachment. Human attachment types are generally divided into three types: security type, anxiety/contradiction type and avoidance type.

What anxious/contradictory couples want from each other is not love and trust, but "emotional hunger", because they are insecure and afraid of being abandoned. Therefore, the other party must keep in touch at all times, and you must know where he is. With who? Do what? So you will blame each other for not returning messages, and at the same time, because of your own needs, you can't confirm whether you are safe or not, and you don't know whether you are loved or not, which leads to anxiety and anxiety. This kind of anxiety and anxiety will prompt people to do some actions, such as chatting with others. Therefore, relying on WeChat to maintain feelings is the emotional demand of a certain type of people.

Thinking is inertia, and this anxious thinking lasts until you reach adulthood. But people can also grow up. In the face of anxiety/contradictory attachment, there is no antidote, only self-help, don't hope for the other half to save you, everyone has their own life to bear. We can start our journey of growth.

1, reflecting and perceiving the current situation and personal status. Consciousness is the first and most important step of change.

2, training: first understand anxiety, reconcile with the past, give yourself a hint: I was powerless before, and now I am the only one who can control my emotions, I can do it. The real sense of security can only come from one place, and that is your heart, which outsiders can't give, including the person you think is desperate to love each other. When encountering threats or suspected threats, you can respond flexibly and selectively.

3. Reflection and inspection: Invite partners to check the process of interaction with each other and see what happened between them that made them anxious or afraid.

4. Seek professional help. In the process of self-exploration, sometimes the guidance of professional psychological counselors is needed. Both partner counseling and personal counseling are important growth resources.

Finally, love is not an emotion that has nothing to do with people's maturity, but only needs investment. If you don't work hard to develop your whole personality and realize a creative tendency, then every attempt at love will fail.