Please allow me to tidy up my article.

I know, I have never been a thinker. I don't like to think about complicated things, and I don't like to guess other people's thoughts. I like to live a simple life and keep it simple, just like the maple trees in Sanqiu, which are almost too rare. I like this kind of life, even if I look back at it in the end, it is blank, as seamless as water, so I am still happy and satisfied.

This kind of thinking directly condenses my introverted and lonely bone marrow. Many friends like water, but I almost stubbornly like mountains, silent mountains. I like to throw myself into the endless mountains, like an exiled child. Close my eyes, as the mountain wind devours every hill bit by bit, submerges every wild flower swaying with the wind intentionally or unintentionally, and overflows my barren mind. In an instant, the spring breeze turned green.

Did I ever tell you that I really like mountains and a quiet and uncontested life? Although, many times, you see me, very noisy, in the crowd. In fact, they didn't see my smiling face with my back to the sun.

I know, at this moment, I can't say that I can see through it, because, as you said, we still have many unfinished responsibilities in this world, which are debts owed in previous lives. If we don't pay them off one by one, how can we walk away? I'm afraid that no matter where our soul goes, it will be uneasy!

Therefore, I must stay in this world, watching the bustling crowd around me, and watching the fate doomed in the wheel of my life. Just like you, just like him, just like them, and ... although tired, but don't talk, sing sad songs and watch happy dramas, what can you do? In the final analysis, individuals just live their own lives, how much does it matter to others?

I know you may not like me like this. You have always liked me so vividly, and you have been noisy in your ear like a child. You also like me to blow my beard and stare, watching me choke to death by your unreasonable troubles. I know you like me like this. I'm glad that I 100% put myself into my work. I try my best in everything, and my requirements are as high as yours. You should be angry every time I make a mistake, right? I know that if it is someone else, you will pull your face down and criticize rudely, but because it is me, you are reluctant and you can't handle it well. You always tell me in a consulting tone that it would be better if we handled it here, or it might be simpler to delete it there. More often, you are making false excuses for my mistakes. You defended my own low-level mistakes and made them look so insignificant. I don't know any of this.

I am a carefree person, afraid of being disturbed and entangled. Just because I participated in the fate of the world, I struggled to live like an ostrich. Fortunately, in everyone's opinion, I am living well, at least I am living with my heart and working hard to face everything. I am complacent about my excellent performance, because I can make so many people happy, and I cry with joy. Isn't the value of a person's existence reflected in the people around him?

I know you don't like me being so decadent. I don't like that I always hide behind the crowd and watch the ebb and flow sadly. I don't like the way I skillfully play with ash, and I don't like the way I get drunk and clamor to go to Shahe to see the night scene. You said that you had tasted all the sufferings in the world, and it was time to taste the sweetness. You wish you could take me. I also think that you must feel the sweetness of life as honey to make up for the purgatory torture imposed on you by life in the past few decades. I always thought so, so I stood behind you quietly, watching you smile, watching you splash your confidence into the crowd, and watching you bloom in the sun. How nice! However, I can't keep up with your pace. I don't like myself like this, and I don't like being so stubborn and so serious. Who said that? I can live happily if I want to. I think so, but tell me, why am I sad against the current? My friend said, I like to watch me write some small fresh and happy words, and I like to watch me plant the shadow of sunshine in every corner of my life. I know, she really wants me to be good, and I really want to live a simple and happy life. But, I'm sorry, I always feel sorry for her. Just like this short message, I think she will blame me after reading it. Destiny takes a hand, life always loses too many people!

You once said that I write too casually, and sometimes I attach some irrelevant emotions together. I know this is the biggest flaw in my writing, but it is also a problem that I have been reluctant to give up. How can a casual and unprovoked person master the law of writing? In fact, I don't know where these words will flow at the moment, will they deviate from my original purpose, will they make you frown at the end and blame me for being a dead wood?

Let me do it again, will you?

The last time I wrote it, it was July 8, and it was the article "Happiness begins with listening to your own voice". After a whole month, I didn't write a word! By this morning, I was shocked by myself when I was browsing my space. I haven't written for a long time, which is unforgivable! Think about what you have done this month. My brain is a mess, I think a lot and forget a lot. The long train, the vast lake, the deep and dense Yang Shulin, countless shops, the chaotic Ningling night market, the lotus pond in the park, and the cup of cold and delicious fried yogurt in Kaifeng snack street ... These are so close, so far away, so confused, I wonder, do they really appear in my life?

It may be hard to travel long distances, but has anyone ever told you that the man on the right hand side, this long journey, is full of rich poetry

A contemptible town with a large population is its most authentic feature, an incomprehensible dialect, and electric motorcycles running all over the street. Compared with the small but profound cultural city where we live, it's really far from it, isn't it? We wandered around those messy streets and lanes, commenting on everything we saw. The street is full of stalls, disheveled, dark-faced men or women, and naked boys urinating everywhere on street corners. All this is filled with a strong smell of fireworks, followed by a strong atmosphere. I despise all this, but your eyes can always cross the section of time and see things that others can't see. You reminded me that every household here has a three-wheeled motorcycle, which fully shows that people here have strong ideas. When traveling, it must be the whole family, old and young. Never go out alone. After your reminding, I took a closer look and it happened. Every three motorcycles are full of people, old and young, laughing and cursing. You said you must write an article about the tricycle culture in this place. You know, after listening to this, I suddenly realized the fundamental difference between you and me-you always live so truly and rationally, while I am a wild crane in the clouds. Have you noticed the affection between fireworks?

You will talk to many people at will, and whether you know them or not, you can quickly find a topic to chat with them. Many times, you always talk nonsense with others willfully, like a child who doesn't grow up. I just follow you, laughing and watching you ramble with people who can't talk, and I won't stop you without saying a word. He laughed that you just walked into a grocery store, grabbed the peanuts cooked on the counter and stuffed them directly into your mouth. He also laughed that you could gossip with strangers, but I was used to it. As long as you are happy, everything is possible for me. Remember that swing? We stepped on the heights together. Actually, I didn't tell you I was afraid of heights. Every time I swing to the highest point, my head is dizzy, but I am very happy to see you smile like an inexperienced child.

I read an article about Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng this morning. Zhang's life is peerless, but he is sad for a romantic man who dances among thousands of flowers all his life. Actually, don't say it's worth it. Don't ask if love is worth it. After reading the text and thinking for a long time, I feel that many things in the world are the same, just like tofu in brine, so willingly. Where can I ask why, and where can I care if you are right or wrong?

In Hou Fangyu's former residence, you stood quietly in front of the wax figure of this gifted scholar and beautiful woman a hundred years ago. I want to know which nerve cell in your heart was touched by that invisible love between life and death. Are you angry about that embarrassing love? Does the sad scene of blood spattering on the peach blossom fan still make you unable to let go? In the deep courtyard of the back house, pomegranate blooms like fire, dotted with the empty courtyard in the afternoon, conveying a sad atmosphere that has passed through a hundred years of time and space. Guess, these pomegranate trees are planted with plum? Did it ever occur to them that the famous actress who attached great importance to emotion and righteousness was fired before the trial? Is deviant love a beautiful mistake from the beginning? Since it is doomed to be fruitless, why start and add another period of sorrow?

You have always been a person who looks at mountains instead of mountains and water instead of water. After seeing this drooping pomegranate, are you dreaming again? There is also the thatched cottage in the Riverside Garden on Qingming Festival. Does it arouse your desire to retire from the mountains? You stood on the stone steps paved with bluestone for a long time, climbed the wooden fence, looked erratic and stared at the gourd on the vine instantly. You said, this cabin belongs to my family! There is no doubt about that tone. I know how much you want to have such an independent cabin! How can a reinforced concrete house put down your unruly heart? In fact, if you can really guard such a hut, draw a river to cook fragrant teas, and listen to the rain at night to beat bananas, it will not be a waste of this life.

Standing on the tower of Kaifeng House, looking at the winding pavilions below, listening to the carved wooden windows that have been worn for a hundred years but still stand in the wind, telling the changes of the Great Song Dynasty, expounding the turbulent years of the Ming and Qing Dynasties, and showing the vicissitudes, ups and downs, honors and disgraces of the dynasties, I think it is a different wave that surges in our hearts!

You suddenly turned around and wanted to jump from here. The seriousness in your eyes is beyond doubt. I know, you're not kidding. I'm afraid this idea is not a day or two for you. At that time, you looked tired and tried to hold the guardrail to prevent yourself from falling. I know, your back must be hurting again. But, you don't say, you never say. You haven't said anything since we started playing. You just follow in our footsteps and don't want to fall behind everyone's pace because of you. How can you last for a few days? At that time, you should really be unable to support your tired body! You look so haggard and tired that you can't hide it. I'm holding a tablet, and I have no intention of taking pictures of you again, although I have always regarded taking pictures of you as the happiest thing. I can't just watch you get hurt. I won't say, I hope I can put your suffering on me, it's too fake and unrealistic. I'm just thinking about how to help you relieve your pain to the greatest extent, so I've been gossiping with you, constantly making you look around and asking you many seemingly idiotic questions. I don't know if this has played the expected role, but I really can only do this. You know, many times, watching your pain and getting into your heart, I can't do anything, and I feel so useless. Along the way, you helped me a lot, and you took care of me carefully, lest I go the wrong way and ruin myself. However, I can only watch you get hurt and watch you suffer all this, but there is nothing I can do.

So, you said, I really want to jump from here. I know, you're not kidding. Jumping is a complete relief for you. But I know better that you won't really be so determined. You are not a determined person. Many times, many things, you are indecisive and hesitant. If you want to do something, you will be reluctant to do it because you care about the feelings of others; If you don't want to do something, you don't want to be entrusted by others, and compromise to do the best. I always thought you were a gyro that never stopped spinning. If others can't beat you, you will spend your whole life spinning and show your gorgeous dance to all the people around you. How can you manage your inner bumps? !

In the quiet copy room of Sokokuji, the dense guzheng sound is like a blooming breeze, soothing the heart of travel-stained people, making people suddenly want to get drunk for a thousand years and never wake up again. The yellow scroll is engraved with Prajna Paramita Heart Sutra and Bodhisattva Mahasa Sutra. The solemn ancient yellow color shows the solemnity and sacredness of Buddhism everywhere. You are silent, and your eyes are full of longing. I know you really want to sit quietly, clean your hands and burn incense, pick up that elegant brush and write down your redemption of past lives on that piece of yellow paper. I tell you, Faye Wong once made a large-scale MV of Heart Sutra in Famen Temple Cultural Square. You answered absently, but your eyes stared thoughtfully at the ink lotus on the wall. At that moment, you were the real you, right? In the deep corridor, there are worshippers everywhere, sitting in the corner muttering to themselves. There is also a little novice monk in a cassock, running in the crowd and running on Van Gogh Avenue far away from the world.

There is an encounter, not on the road, but in my heart. There is a kind of scenery called watching the flowing water with you. The noisy and messy night street in Ningling is the warmest memory in my heart. Whether it is Ge Shitian or not, being with your heart is a good scenery of life.

Adu is a sad person, and his vicissitudes always make this melody tremble like a cuckoo weeping blood. I have read a passage: in this world, no one can accompany anyone for a lifetime. Finally, after all, I will go alone. I know this sentence is true. Since childhood, so many people have come and gone in my life. When I love them, my heart is broken and unforgettable. If you don't love, you will know it without a trace, as if you have never met. In those years, I always thought that no matter how many teenagers, no matter how many people I met, some people would be remembered for life, and no one could replace them. I have struggled for more than ten years, and I can't get along with myself. I often feel paralyzed in the dark, remembering in my mind over and over again, and magnifying the pain over and over again. Every day, I want to meet again in the rolling world of mortals and look at those strange and familiar eyes. However, I don't know, there really is such a day, really standing in front of each other, only to understand that meeting is not as good as missing. How heartbreaking this understanding is, like acupuncture. My heart is empty at once, and I am scattered, and there is no connection. Just say it. I just know, it's not that I can't let go of that person, but that I'm too greedy to miss someone! I once asked you, what should we do if one day we come to a dead end? You said I wouldn't leave as long as you didn't. You are so stupid, don't you know that I am a cloud? How can clouds not pass by? However, silly you are still worried, who will accompany me in the future without you! Tell me, how can there be such a stupid woman as you in this world? You are always like this, desperate to be nice to others, desperate, and your kindness to others permeates into your bones. I was angry that you were unprepared, but you said you were too tired to guess other people's thoughts. You said, you don't want to hide, you don't want to pretend, you are you, the person you like can be close, and the person you don't like can be far away. Now that I think about it, I'm afraid your angular and uncompromising personality is what attracts me the most!

You have no principles for being kind to me, and everything will be considered for me. Even if I made a mistake, you wouldn't blame me. You want me to be better. You gave me all the good suggestions you have summarized for decades, just in the hope that I can become a popular teacher like you. You can talk all night, talk in Kan Kan, criticize the current shortcomings, and denounce the so-called scholars and experts who pretend not to understand. Many times, you are very low-key, but in teaching art, you have shown extraordinary conceit. I know you are confident enough to be afraid of high-profile behavior. However, I often let you down. I don't regard work as a career like you. I just think of it as a career where I can make a living. I don't think of students as children like you. Do you think they like it or not? When we are together, we often talk about our students, which children are smart, which children are naughty and which children have changed at home. When it comes to students, there are always endless words, like an old woman in her seventies and eighties. Although I'm tired of listening, I can't spoil your fun, so I have to answer one by one. I know that for students, you are the love from the heart; For the job, you are also eager to do your best. You tell me this in the hope that I can try to be a pure and noble educator. I know all your kindness, but it may not be what you want. Just like writing words, you will never teach me how to write, but you will hit the nail on the head and let me understand it myself. I know all this, but please forgive me for not going the way you imagined. I am destined to be a vagrant all my life, both physically and mentally. I have never drawn a blueprint for my life, and I don't even think about the meaning of living. Before I met you, I was willful. I did a lot of wrong things but I didn't know how to repent. I indulged myself and only wanted to be happy one day. I didn't know how shallow I was until I met you, read your words and participated in your life. I also try to keep up with you and live a proud and independent life like you. However, after all, we are different individuals with irreconcilable thoughts and personalities, so I may really not be able to do what you expect. I'm sorry! You said, maybe I owed you a lot of money in my last life, so I will pay you back twice in this life, but don't you think you actually owed me a lot in your last life? If we owe each other, I'm afraid we are doomed to be entangled in this life. However, if one day, what should be paid back, and the two are not in debt, what should we do?

If one day, we really lose each other, please be sure to bloom as hard as you are today, like a lotus flower, like a pool of fragrance, like the clear water in the river beside Longting Park. In that way, even if the ends of the earth smell the fragrance and know the old friend, I will certainly run to the road agreed with you, and then, gently say-

Long time no see!

You see, I'm writing, and I'm off topic again.

I know, you will watch and scold, and then you can't help laughing. You know me best, and naturally you know my writing best. I trust horses, but I don't care about clouds and the moon!

I am destined to be an ambitious person, and this is all my achievements in my life. Therefore, my spring can only be a wild lily in full bloom in the mountain stream, which is too big to save the whole dry Kun tide. However, don't worry, whether the breeze comes or not, I will bloom in my world with great care.

Although life is only a short journey compared with you, I still want to say that I have seen through the mountains and rivers along the way. At this moment, I just want to calm down and slow down. An old man told you that the greatest happiness in life is not that you can do whatever you want, but that you can't do anything if you don't want to. What a wise old man! He must have experienced the ups and downs of life to have such a thorough understanding. When I was young, I always felt that the world owed me and wanted to conquer everything. Climbing a mountain, even if you are tired of vomiting blood, you must climb to the top; You must strive for the first place in doing things before you feel worthy of your own efforts. Soft-blooded, not tolerant and considerate, often emotionally hurt many people and made many mistakes. Now, you can finally calm down and savor the mellow taste of the slow-fire stew time. Just like this moment, I can sit quietly beside my mother and listen to her reading her eternal classics with great interest. When I meet a word I don't know, I will patiently help her to note pinyin beside it. Before that, I always felt that chanting was like a hooping spell, which made people full of troubles; I can also patiently watch a circle of sons, nephews and nieces get together to tease ants. They had a good time. I actually saw them dancing, which was definitely not as dignified as being a teacher and an elder in the past. I will also sit quietly on the stone pier in front of the old house, greet the villagers coming and going, and ask kindly, have you eaten?

Suddenly, I like this day very much. Boiled cabbage with clear water is tasteless, but it is enduring in Micari.

I went swimming yesterday and accidentally drowned. Crawling around in the water, choking several mouthfuls. At that moment, I really panicked. I suddenly became afraid and died like this. I tried my best to catch something and get out of the water, but the more I struggled, the more helpless I became. Finally, I clumsily got out and gasped greedily. I finally know that I've been talking about life and death for a long time. I'm too naive. Because of an argument with him, I cut my left wrist with a knife. But when I really faced death, I was so scared and resisted. I know, in fact, I really care about living.

Monks who lie in the Buddhist temple say that I have Buddhist karma, and I always feel afraid that I will die one day and let go of this worldly disturbance. I once told him that one day I would go to the temple to be an aunt. He looked at me with tears in his eyes and gnashed his teeth. If one day, I must tear down all the temples in the world! I wonder if he remembers what he said.

There is no whole law in the world, so it is better to be negative than negative.

On the pillar of a rain shelter on the mountain, tears fell when I saw this sentence. Forget it, forget it.

I don't want to be the climbing Campbell. I can't stand the life that is too ostentatious. Just let me make a grass quietly and open it at the head of that rural village or in any gap in the vast grassland, okay? I will sing songs against the mountain wind every day, bathe in the rain and wash my humble but not humble soul. I will try my best to bloom where you can or can't see it. As long as you look back, I will give you the warmest smile in the world of fireworks and mortals. ...

So, please allow me, allow me to fall into the dust like a grass, waiting for the heavens and the earth to be clear.