You don't need to point fingers-funny QQ. Tell me about it.

The world is unfair, because God said, "I want light!" " "So there was this day. The beauty said, "I want a diamond ring!" " "So she got a diamond ring. The rich man said, "I want a woman!" " "So he has a woman. I said, "I want to take a shower!" " "The water was cut off!

In high school, we were as busy as our grandchildren, but we were as happy as SB. In college, we do nothing, but we can't find the happiness when we are grandchildren …

The beauty of learning is that people are confused; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man is that he speaks during the day.

I have no time to play with you. Big names like me are full this year. I have a lot of movies, TV plays and advertisements to watch.

When going out, my wife confessed: drink less and eat more vegetables. If you can't reach it, stand up.

Calculate the salary increase, and you will find that you are even worse than a pig!

It is said that men become bad when they have money. I have been a good person for more than 20 years!

I am poor. My servant is poor, too. My gardener is also poor. My driver is also poor.

Camel doesn't shed tears because it knows the preciousness of water, and girls don't shed tears because they haven't found anyone worth shedding tears.

My colleague had a quarrel with someone and opened his mouth in a hurry. "Do you think I grew up eating?" I've always wondered what he grew up eating.

Life depends on cherry blossoms? The difference is-under the bed.

The taxi used to be called, the girl used to be called honey, the flirt used to be called indecent assault, and the handsome guy used to be called cool.

The exam is over, I hope you will give priority to surprises, supplemented by cheating. Take the circuitous strategy of the teacher entering and hiding, and the teacher returning and copying.

I'm here to shout in a low key, I don't have time to participate in your past, and I don't want to participate in your future.

On the wedding night, the monkey groom asked the bride: What do you like about me and choose to marry me? The dog bride said shyly, it is not for the sake of children's humanity!

As a monk, my task is to give love to all beings, to fall in love, and to talk about this world full of love.

Don't talk about eating your rotten watermelons, Lao Tzu's soup in Dongda canteen is free!

I want everything, but I am shameless. Eat everything, but lose nothing.

Wait … wait … listen to me … it was just my sudden impulse, because I am hot-blooded, bohemian and ignorant …

People don't know why they ask, "What's the matter?" His family even cried: "Great, great!" !

I thought I was evil until I met him. Few people are better than me.

There are three kinds of people in the world: those whose conscience is eaten by dogs, those whose conscience is not eaten by dogs, and those whose conscience doesn't even eat dogs.

Pigs have pig thoughts, and people have people's thoughts. If a pig has a human brain, it is not a pig-it is Bajie!

When a chicken grows up, it becomes a goose. When a goose grows up, it becomes a sheep. When a sheep grows up, it becomes a cow. After the cow, I succeeded in my postgraduate entrance examination!

Stealing one person's ideas is plagiarism, while stealing many people's ideas is research.

Promising people pay bank interest, while losers charge bank interest.

Life is like a super girl, and all the men who can go to the end are pure men.

A man named Li Shuang died, and his family cried and said, "Cool! Cool. . .

In such a cold day, a cold is like a woman's menstrual period, coming every few days.

These are not rubbish! I collect antiques! Of course, you can throw it away if you don't like it.

When there is a bright moon, ask the sky for wine ... the sky says, fuck you, I'm so busy, I don't have time to talk to you, watch the weather forecast by myself!

Whenever I see someone pretending to be B, I always keep my head down. I didn't cultivate well, I looked for bricks.

His sword is cold, his heart is cold, and his blood is cold. Shit, isn't this man dead?

Huang Zhong fought with Liu Bei and Tokugawa Ieyasu at the age of 70, became prime minister with Jiang Ziya at the age of 80, followed She Taijun at the age of 100, studied Buddhism with the Monkey King at the age of 500, and fell in love with White Snake at the age of 1000. Young man, what do you mean you are in a hurry?

When Cao Cao met Jiang Gan, Jiang Gan asked politely, "Fuck, how is your mother?" Shit, I fainted. The next day, when they met again, Cao Cao greeted them first: "Fuck, how is your family?" I feel dizzy.

On the bus, a man ran into anonymous, and the woman was furious and said, you can't stand on three legs! The man waved his hand and said, forget it. I won't argue with you. You're full of it anyway

I am unknown in this world. You turned all beings upside down in the vegetable market.

If you don't eat for free, you can eat for free, and whoever eats for free will not eat.

In a public place, someone suddenly farted, and a man patted him on the shoulder and said, listen to the accent, you are not from here.

The only difference between a friend and an assassin is that the assassin stabbed you in the back and you turned around and said painfully, Ah, who are you? A friend stabbed you in the back, and you looked back and said in surprise, Ah, it's you!

I am young and need advice, but I don't need your advice. ...

We walk on the road, and when we see children, we go over and kick them, proving that we are not pedophiles …

I am young and need your advice, but I don't need your advice.

First, learn to treat loneliness as a lover and never be afraid of a person again.

Second, it is easy before the exam, not easy after the exam, and live and cherish it.

Third, there is no such thing as empathy in the world. People don't know how painful it is to prick themselves with a needle.

I don't always call animals without a thousand praises, but I have her.

The last thing I want to see is that you don't have to cling to the moment when your back is turned to me.

6. I can't tell you what it's like to be silent for too long, which will inevitably tear my heart out.

Seven, [time has repeatedly forced me to admit that you are the person I shouldn't love]

No matter how mean you win in your progress, as long as you are the king, no one will say you are wrong.

Nine, all troubles and pains will disappear under the reflection of the morning light.

I have visited all your girlfriends and always believe that I am the best one.

XI。 Will you die if you don't lick Oreo bubble?

You still have feelings for her, but I still want to spend the rest of my life with you.

Thirteen, I don't know how long my broken body can love you.

I am the kind of person who thinks the worst of everything. It is better to be disappointed in advance than suddenly.

15. I like you so much that you don't care about your family, but you didn't even give me a good heart.

Sixteen, dear. What the hell happened to us? Tell me. Where exactly are we wrong? At this moment, we were silent together.

Don't wake me up even if I cry in his dream, okay?

No matter how beautiful and strong the love is. Breaking up can be completely ruined.

19. We must pretend that we have never had what we can't get.

Twenty, I tried very hard, but I couldn't touch you.

Do you know why I will never quarrel with you? Because I know I can't argue with you.

Twenty-two, nobody wants me except you. I don't want anyone but you!

I feel lonely even if there are many companions around you every day.

Can you tell me the way to heaven? I want to find my lover.

25. Don't worry about vagaries and twists and turns. How can you play with fate?

Twenty-six, don't leave me and memories here, I don't want too much, as long as you are here.

Twenty-seven, youth is a heavy rain, even if you catch a cold, you still look forward to it again.

Twenty-eight, when classmates get together, I find that I can't name them, and I can't help but feel that I have skipped classes too much. After eating, I found that I was in the wrong room.

Twenty-nine, the person who slaps you every time will let you know whether you are a human or a dog.

My communication skills are poor, but I don't know what magic I have to know you great people.

Do you want to scold? Do you want to cry? Do you want to die? Is it interesting? Have you had enough?

32. I am alone. I am not alone. Honestly, maybe. I don't know.

33. The sun is so lonely and insecure that it can't be looked directly at.

I know my emotional contagion can't help you, so I won't say anything.

I am young and need your advice, but I don't need your advice.

Thirty-six, how many people are working hard in a foreign city now, enduring loneliness and loneliness, and walking through the four seasons alone, getting cold and warm.

Thirty-seven, how badly I cried. Are you okay? I swallowed all my tears back.

38. The rest are destined to stay. Those who leave are doomed to part if they don't want to see each other again.

After I die, please take my ashes with you. If you meet a bad person, let me protect you for the last time.

40. He said forever is a lifetime. You are ridiculous.

The post-90 s need the guidance of the post-80 s predecessors, not pointing.

1. Don't run amok when you are young. What can I say when I am old?

When I was a child, I thought bleeding was a very serious thing. Whether it hurts or not, I cried first. I didn't know until I grew up that tears actually hurt more than blood.

I admit that I still like you, but I don't have the impulse to be with you.

Don't think that the whole world has forgotten you. In fact, the world has never paid attention to you.

The teacher always told us not to lie, and taught us to lie as soon as we came to check. ...

6. If one day you find that I am no longer pestering you, don't think that I don't love you and don't care about you. Actually, I was just waiting for you to come to me.

7. One day you will find out how good I am, and then I will proudly refuse you.

8. In the workplace, you should be like Conan. There is a domineering spirit that I let others die wherever I go!

If one day the whole world hates me, will you tell me that I still like you so much?

10, what I miss is not you, but the fatal past you gave me.

1 1, close your eyes, I see my future is bright!

12. Life is like poop, and we are intoxicated with it like dung beetles.

13, leave the last sip of water to comrades in need! Give me that bottle of orange juice.

14, people who think that "forget me" and "break up" are the cruelest words in the world really don't understand the world. You haven't heard the words "get up quickly"

15, China high school assignments are arranged with more than 300 million words a year, and the papers can circle the earth twice in succession, ranking first in sales for 9 consecutive years!

After 16, you need the guidance of the post-80 s seniors, not pointing fingers.

17, if you walk alone, you will be in heat. When two people walk together, they will be passionate. In a threesome, there must be adultery

18, the real girl is not perfect, and the perfect girl is not real.

19, the long road of life has been lost.

I will be an antique in 50 years, so you should collect me now.

2 1, a man's words can lie to a woman for one night, and a woman's words can lie to a man for a lifetime!

22. When you are alive, you will be laughed at by others first, then smile at others, and then die with a smile.

23. The house price is so high that I can't even make up the down payment for your heart.

24. blame yourself Have the ability to like others, but have the ability to make others like you.

25. If she (he) says to you, "Forget me!" You tell each other, "I never remember."

Since you live in this world, you should love yourself. You cann't wronged yourself for a man,

Look at the mood of rainy days: no matter how well you do it, there are still people pointing fingers.

First, there will always be people saying hello, and there will always be people saying that you are not good, but as long as you have a clear conscience, you don't have to cling to other people's judgments. You don't need to look at other people's eyes, and you don't need to please others blindly, so you will live more tired.

Second, don't preach your heart everywhere. You are not the only one with stories in this world. Don't vent your pain everywhere. No one will feel the same way.

Third, in the journey of life, there is always a time when you need to walk and carry yourself. Don't feel afraid, don't feel lonely, it's just the price of growth.

Fourth, there are too many people around who have not torn their faces. Obviously, they can't turn against each other easily. Smiling at annoying people and things is disgusting that we must learn.

Five, some things, think too much headache, figured it out. So, don't think if you don't think hard. If you don't get it, don't. Why do you want to wronged yourself? Let go of the burden, forget all the troubles and spend every day happily.

Sixth, if you are valuable, you will be like a magnet. Friends and even former strangers are willing to turn around and stay with you. Don't complain about the reality of this world, making yourself strong is the best sense of security for yourself.

Seven, keep yourself busy, so busy that you have no time to think about unimportant things, so many things are quietly forgotten. Time may not prove many things, but it can certainly see through many things.

Eight, there are some people in life who pass by us, but they have no time to meet; Met, but it was too late to get to know each other; Get to know each other, but get to know each other too late; I'm familiar with it, but I still have to say goodbye. Be good to yourself, because life is not long; Be kind to the people around you, because you may not meet them in the next life.

Nine, no matter how well you do, there are still people pointing fingers; Even if you are in a mess, there are still people singing hymns. So you don't have to fall into the eyes of others. All you need to please is yourself.

Ten, no one will really feel your pain, and no one will really care about the obstacles and injuries you encounter along the way, so don't go around telling people about your pain to seek comfort, because others only look at the results and only care about the results. Growth is an isolated process, and you must learn to be independent.