100 points reward five people's sketch scripts.

I wrote it in my old school on New Year's Day.

[Short Play] Song Wu hits the tiger

As the sun sets, there is a story on Jingyanggang that is sung by later generations:

Picking mulberry seeds, Song Wuhu.

The trees beside the sycamore and bluestone harvest Sang Yu every day.

Eighteen bowls of wine,

How to make a strong man drunk?

It's a long way to Xiu Yuan, and the time is several degrees.

The bones on the spine,

Make Song Wu famous.

A: Let's not talk about gossip. Let's talk about this tiger hero, Takejiro-

B: Wait a minute. Do you want to tell the story of Song Wu killing a tiger right away? What does that actor do? Please look-

Song Wu stepped forward, holding a whistle stick in his hand, but saw a flag flying, which read "three bowls but not the post" in five Chinese characters. It's a pity that Song Wu can't read, but he just smelled the wine and felt very happy before he went into the shop and sat down.

Wu: Boss, come and have a drink.

Xiao er: how many bowls does the guest officer want?

Wu: Three, seven, one, eighteen (whispering) Just eighteen bowls!

Xiao Er (with a sad face): This guest official, our store clearly says that "three bowls are not enough", but you want 18 bowls, obviously to kick the pavilion. Hum!

Wu: Are you afraid that I have no money to pay?

Xiao er: A bowl of wine in our shop is as big as a jar. A bowl of 400 yuan, 18 bowls of 7200 yuan. Although it's watered, I'm afraid you can't drink it.

Wu: Well, I'm here to have a rest because it's very hot today. I must have been talking nonsense just now. Bye.

The shopkeeper came out and said, wait a minute. Do you know that there is a big bug with a white forehead hanging in front of Jingyanggang? It came out late, harming others and destroying many people's lives.

Wu: White-fronted bug, what bug is so powerful?

Shopkeeper (wearing glasses and pretending to be a scholar): White-fronted bugs, namely tigers, canines and wolves, are about 70 cm long and have a long face. ...

Xiao er: boss, you are talking about the fox!

Shopkeeper (very angry): I lost my salary this month. Let's start over. Tigers are aquatic vertebrates. It breathes with its gills and moves forward with its fins.

Xiao er: manned, you are wrong again. This is fish.

Shopkeeper (more angry): Your salary will not be paid next month, so we will start again. Tigers are herbivorous livestock, belonging to the genus Amphibia, suitable for grinding.

Xiao Er (excited): Please, deduct my salary from next month! You said donkey this time.

Wu: These two are crazy and don't know what to say. I'd better go first

It is said that Song Wu visited a tree for a long time, and a placard was posted on the tree, which read two words: "Visit the Tiger Nature Reserve ahead for free (if you can come back alive)."

Wu (after watching and thinking for a while): Alas, alas, I can't read (and roared off).

A big tiger jumped out of the Woods. Song Wu got a fright and loudly He Wen:

Wu: Oh! What kind of bug are you?

Tiger: What, that what? King Gehudi!

Wu: Baota Town River Demon!

Tiger: Run in.

Wu: Nobody has a home when talking at noon.

Tiger: Why are you blushing?

Wu (full of passion): full of energy!

Tiger (suspect): Why is it yellow again?

Wu (sudden pain): I have a bad stomach recently, and I have pulled too much.

Tiger: The code is wrong! You are not one of us!

Wu: Nonsense! Who's with you, you big bug?

Tiger: I planted tall trees and opened quiet paths. Think about this road (sticking out three fingers)

Wu: (takes out thirty cents) I told you I wouldn't bother you if it was so cheap.

Tiger: Send a beggar? Take your life. (settle down)

Shen: One man, one tiger, a big battle is just around the corner (action)

Yuan: I saw that big bug jump up and pounce on it.

Shen: Take your time. He leaned slightly and pointed to the head hole of the tiger's waist, which was a blow.

Wu: Oh? Shit, it seems that tigers don't have acupuncture points?

Tiger: (holding the trunk and vomiting violently): What are you doing with my stomach? (settle down)

Shen: The tiger vomited all his food the other day!

Yuan: I shot when I saw the opportunity.

Wu: Turtles send gas (as gas storage).

Yuan: The tiger swooped forward and tried desperately, but stepped on the banana skin that had just been spit out.

Tiger: (falls down) Ouch! (HP-)

Wu: Where is Gong-(drawing turtle qigong on the blackboard) (after the fight)? No, where is that bug? (Bowing his head) So there you are!

Good skill! I cann't believe you're hiding

Shen: This turtle hit the tree!

Tiger: Good Qigong! It broke my new coat! (Sobbing) I want you to kill your clothes for your life! (fixed) (HP-)

Shen: I heard that the quality of this tiger coat is very good.

Yuan: Yes, it is said that he also gave his precious fur for this. (action)

Shen: The tiger took a low kick and hit the calf.

Yuan: Pull out the whistle stick, jump up and hit the tiger on the head.

Shen: Tigers can't dodge! This stick hit the tree!

Yuan: The tiger quickly stood up, and "bells and drums chimed" and hit the temple!

Shen: Get down and get out of the way. The tiger slapped the tree!

Yuan: Swing a stick to kill a tiger. The tiger hides behind the tree and hits it with a stick!

Shen: The sentry is broken!

Tiger: I'm going to perform my magic! Ah-(starts moving waves)

Shen: It's hit! (HP-)

Wu: Ah! (backward)

Tiger: Yes! (Hold out two fingers) (Hold still)

Shen: By this time, the tree had been knocked unconscious by these two men.

The tree turns three times and falls to the tiger. )

Tiger: Huh? (Blowing at the tree) (The tree leans to the other side)

Tiger: Yes! (stretching out two fingers)

The tree fell backwards.

Tiger: Huh? (Blow, blow, blow)

The tree continues to press down, and the momentum is overwhelming. )

Tiger: Ah! (If you hit a fly, the tree will fly together) (Stop halfway) (HP-)

Yuan: The tiger didn't expect him to actually.

Shen: (after wiping HP) I was killed by a tree!

Tiger: (Continue to make up your mind) The most painful thing in the world is this! (action) (hitting the wall)

Wu: (getting up) It hurts! Tiger, I want to fight you! Hmm? Where is the tiger? (Looking around) Tiger? Big bug? Old—

Hey (looking at the ground) dead? Hahaha! I knew you were no match for someone as powerful as me! I'm not afraid of another hundred tigers! ! !

(Five tigers roar together) Here we come!

Wu: (raising the whistle stick, high-spirited, posing) Good! Alas, you big bugs have the courage to stay here! I'll be right back! Don't run here. Oops, diarrhea, oops (running out the door)

Shen: After the tiger fight, WuErlang became famous!

Yuan: He also got the nickname of Tiger Hero, which is very famous.

Wu: (posing)

Qi: Fight.

Tiger: (sadly) tiger.

short

One day, my five-year-old son asked me:

"Mommy, where did I come from? 」

I replied, "You came out of my stomach! 」

My son looked at my stomach and asked:

"That I was very young, and no eyes and mouth? 」

I replied, "Yes! 」

"Oh ..."

After a while, my son came running again:

"Mommy, mommy, when did you eat me? 」

Five people

Some crosstalk scripts, can you understand them?

/Qing Xiang/nostalgia text /list.html

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Sketch script, see if there is anything you want:

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/xiaopin/List/List _ 14 . html

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