How to satirize in-laws' eccentricity in one sentence?

To satirize the in-laws' eccentricity in one sentence, you can write like this:

1, are you afraid that the compass is useless?

2, eccentric to the Pacific Ocean, Bao Xiao is a grandson, Dabao is not your grandson.

3, quirks are common, but you are the real murderer who always moves my things.

4. It is said that your partiality killed our love.

5, a bowl of water is flat, but it seems that even if it is a creature, the water is still tilted, which is a bit scary.