Short jokes in English and Chinese

>32. Where, where to lie down on the fall

33. Tiger does not shout at you when I was a HELLO KITTY!

34. The donkey is the idea came back ~

◆ woman fat or plump thin is thin high slender dwarf is petite; men fat or thin is ribs pig dwarf bamboo is high is Professor of melon ◆： 90 of adult women in China was not a virgin do send a letter to the President of the other 10 Have you heard of this woman do? Public girls shaking his head. "So you have not received the letter!" ◆ "I have a sort of love you?" "As much as a dime." "Only so little?" "Not a dime is 'very' me?" ◆ You long creative, living your courage, ugly is not your intention, God made a temper, live, without you, who set off the beauty of the world!

01. The early bird catches the worm, Early Riser, eaten by birds!

02. And a whale MM argument is not a fish, finally, I said , "say the word, I also take personal," she agreed to a whale That was not the fish.

03. Tiechu to grind needles, but can only be ground into a toothpick Mu Chu, material does not, more effort is useless.

04. If Replies is a virtue, then I would become a saint.

05. Life can not be like cooking, all the materials are ready before the pot.

06. I heard a woman such as clothing, brother of brotherhood. Looking back, I actually busy divvying up the streaker for 20 years!

07. Wear someone el

se's shoes, go its own way, let them go play in the search.

08. There is a very ancient legend, said to be in the XX beautiful campus to see who will live forever... . ..

09. Are the eggs all over the world together can break stones? ! So life is still to be realistic ... ...

10. Not afraid of the tiger as the enemy, afraid of pigs as teammates!

11. Summer is not good, poor northwest wind when I could not even get to drink... no...

12. I've had a pair of wings, but I did not use it in the sky, but on the stew pot...

13. The water is clear there are no fish were to base the invincible!

14. I am not a casual person, and I can not man up.

15. Today, I say to my school group visits - to tell the truth, this is the first time I said, I see the clothes!

16. Thinking of how far, how far you roll! ! !

17. I am poor, my family's servants are also very poor, my family's gardener is also very poor, very poor drivers of my home... ...

18. Bank charges, said: "This is in line with international practice!" Service, said: "To consider the situation of China!"

19. On the horse, not necessarily a prince, he may be the Tang Monk; with angel wings are not necessarily, he may be a bird person.

20. Huai just like pregnancy, long time before people see it.

21. Points higher, farther urine.

22

. A minimum goal of Students: peasant woman, spring, a bit field

23. I phone a friend in his girlfriend's name is "he", then they broke up, they become "it" ... ...

24. Nothing matters not to me, and something not to me!

25. Do you think I will watch you die you go to? I will close my eyes to!

26. Buddha said: "Looking back only 500 of past lives this life in exchange for a pass." I would prefer to pass to a world in exchange for life's 500 Review.

27. What shall I love you to death ... ...

28. Network is like a prison, stole a purse originally came in, so when anything out of the learned.

29. Angels fly the reason is because they themselves see very light ... ...

30. I want to puppy love, but it is too late ... ...

31. Shitai! You from the old monk it!

32. I love you! None of your business?

33. Xuehaiwuya, repent and be saved!

34. Life tmd fun, because life is to play my old tmd!

35. This world, I believe two people, one is me and the other is not you .

36. I do not know who bed-law, daughter-I do not know who's bed!

37. I wish I could personally control your grandfather cry: Daddy!

38. NTUT lied to me four years in college, so I'm going to teach me the knowledge of fraud Greeley social life!

39. I have friends around, ah, you have known it quickly so that I ca

n sell the memoirs of a ~ ~ ~

40. When you put on love, wedding, and I put on a monk's robe ... ...

41. Never seen such a disgusting school - the midterm exam is set at May 8! ! ! (Cover up)

42. Prices higher and higher, so fewer and fewer good men... ...

43. If I do the emperor, on the seal when you Prince!

44. I have a friend phone in his girlfriend's name is "he", then they broke up, they become "it " ... ...

45. Has never become a good student, is strong and reliable quality!

46. Damn, I been complaints against the! Customers say the mp3 files I gave him no images!

47. Life sometimes is like eunuchs **** it - resistance is painful, do not resist or pain!

48. Will each reduce the number of girls to boys behind the 6!

49. East say the west side of the rain, I am enthusiastic teacher mercilessly. So when I test the door to the common struggle and students!

50. What a strange thing to embrace, clearly depend on so close, but not see each other face

1. Money is not the problem, the problem is lack of money!

2. When I’m drunk, I won’t accept anyone, so I’ll hold on to the wall!

3. I’m like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future, but looking for No way out.

4. Senior brother, do you know? The second brother's meat is now more expensive than the master's.

5. If eating more fish can replenish the brain and make people smarter, then you must eat at least a pair of whales...

6. If the water is clear, there will be no fish; if the people are humble, they will be invincible.

7. Youth is like toilet paper. There is a lot of it, but once you use it, it is not enough~

8. Pregnancy is like pregnancy. It takes a long time for people to notice it. .

9. Friends around me, please become famous quickly, so that my memoirs can sell well~~~

10. Colleagues may be nervous when they go to meet clients. , and as soon as he opened his mouth, he said: "Hello, Mr. Liu, what is your surname?" Oh~~~~~~

11. A female classmate is a little darker, and her boyfriend is a little too fair. In Tian's dormitory, the venomous diva suddenly said to her: "You can't do this, you will give birth to zebras."

12. I have always regarded handsome men and money as dirt, and they have always regarded them like this. Mine

13. Don’t compare yourself to me, I am too lazy to compare with you

14. I am not a casual person, I am not a human being when I am casual

15 .God said, let there be light, but I said I opposed it, and from then on there was darkness in the world

16. I am in a bad mood today. I only have four things to say, including this sentence and the previous two sentences. I’ve finished my words...

17. To be a human being, you must be a person hovering between Cow A and Cow C

18. My big name is God, and my little name is God. His name is Jesus, his English name is God, his dharma name is Tathagata...

19. You can’t hang yourself on a tree, you have to try to die on several nearby trees several times

20. A tree without bark will surely die; a man without shame will be invincible in the world.

21. The farmer’s three punches hurt a little

22. In fact, I have always been very popular: when I was a child, everyone loved me, but now I am loved by bitches

23. Don’t be afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but be afraid of teammates who are like pigs

24. Go your own way and let others take a taxi

25. Rats carry knives. Looking for cats all over the street

26. As long as you work hard and poop seriously

27. Who is the fastest in China? It's Cao Cao (not Liu Xiang). Because Cao Cao and Cao Cao are here

28. Get away as far as your thoughts go

29. Only when there is a long queue at the train station can you truly realize that you are "Descendants of the Dragon".

32. Lie down wherever you fall

33. If the tiger doesn’t show its power, you think I am HELLO KITTY!

34. A donkey is a wrong idea~

◆A woman is fat, plump, slim, tall, slender, short, petite; a fat man is fat, a pig is thin, a rib is tall, a bamboo pole Short is a winter melon◆Professor: 90% of adult women in our country are not virgins. The president sent a letter to other 10% of women. Have you heard about this? The girls shook their heads. "Then you haven't received the letter!" ◆ "How much do you love me?" "As much as a dime." "Is that all?" "Isn't a dime equal to 'ten'?" ◆You You are very creative. Living is your courage. Being ugly is not your original intention. It is God who lost his temper. If you continue to live, without you, who will bring out the beauty of the world!

01. The early bird catches the worm, the early bird catches the worm!

02. I was arguing with a girl about whether whales are fish. Finally, I said, "Japanese people also have personal characters", and she finally agreed that whales are not fish.

03. An iron pestle can be ground into a needle, but a wooden pestle can only be ground into a toothpick. If the material is wrong, no matter how hard you try, it will be useless.

04. If replying was a virtue, then I would have become a saint long ago.

05. Life cannot be like cooking, where you have to prepare all the ingredients before cooking.

06. It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually ran around naked for 20 years!

07. Wear other people’s shoes, go your own way, and let them find it.

08. There is an old legend that says that people who can see beautiful women on XX campus will live forever...

09. Could it be that if all the eggs in the world unite, they will live forever? Can it break a stone? ! So you should be more realistic as a human being...

10. Don’t be afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but be afraid of teammates who are like pigs!

11. Summer is just not good. When I was poor, I couldn’t even drink the northwest wind...

12. I once had a pair of wings, but I didn’t use them. Soar in the sky, but put it in a pot to stew soup...

13. If the water is extremely clear, there will be no fish, and if the people are extremely humble, they will be invincible!

14. I am not a casual person, I am not a casual person.

15. Today a group of Japanese people came to visit our school - to be honest, this is the first time I have seen Japanese people wearing clothes!

16. Go as far as your thoughts go! ! !

17. I am very poor, my servant is also very poor, my gardener is also very poor, my driver is also very poor...

18. The bank said when charging: "This is in line with international practice!" The service said: "China's national conditions must be considered!"

19. The one riding the white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be Tang Monk; the one with wings is not necessarily an angel, he Probably Birdman.

20. Pregnancy is like pregnancy, it takes a long time for people to see it.

21. The higher you stand, the farther you pee.

22. A college student’s minimum goal: a farmer’s wife, a mountain spring, and some farmland

23. My friend’s name on his girlfriend’s cell phone is “him”. Later they broke up. Became "it"...

24. Don't come to me if you have nothing to do, and don't come to me if you have something to do!

25. Do you think I will watch you die? I'll close my eyes!

26. Buddha said: "It takes 500 looks back in the past life to get one pass in this life." I would rather have a pass in the next life in exchange for 500 looks back in this life.

27. What can I do to kill your lover...

28. The Internet is like a prison. You enter with a stolen wallet, but when you get out, you have everything. Learned.

29. The reason why angels can fly is because they take themselves very lightly...

30. I want to fall in love early, but it is too late...

31.Master! Just obey me!

32. I love you! What does it have to do with you?

33. There is no limit to learning, only to return to the shore!

34. Life is fun, because life always plays with me!

35. I only believe in two people in this world, one is me and the other is not you.

36. I don’t know whose wife is on my bed, I don’t know whose bed my wife is on!

37. I really want to call your grandfather: Dad!

38. Beijing University of Science and Technology deceived me for four years of college, so I plan to use the knowledge that Beijing University of Science and Technology taught me to deceive society for the rest of my life!

39. Friends around me, hurry up and become famous, so that my memoirs can sell well~~~

40. When you put on the wedding dress of love , I also put on the monk's cassock...

41. I have never seen such a disgusting school - the midterm exam is scheduled for May 8th! ! ! (Taboo)

42. House prices are getting higher and higher, so there are fewer and fewer good men...

43. If I become the emperor, I will make you the prince!

44. My friend’s name on his girlfriend’s mobile phone was “him”. Later they broke up and it became “it”...

45. Never reduced to An excellent college student relies on strong character!

46. Damn it, I got complained! The customer said that the mp3 file I gave him had no images!

47. Sometimes life is like being raped by a eunuch - resisting is painful, not resisting is still painful!

48. Reduce the number of boys behind each girl to 6!

49. The sun rises in the east and rains in the west. The teacher is ruthless and I am affectionate. So I have to fight with my classmates during the exam!

50. Hugging is really a strange thing. They are so close but can’t see each other’s faces