Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - How to open the garage?

How to open the garage?

This car is good, and that car is great. How we talk about it is an armchair strategist. Finally, you have to spend money to buy a good car! where is the money to come from? I pondered for more than three hours and finally found a way to make money: driving a garage!

Most car lovers pay attention to the study of buying a car and driving, but ignore the link of repairing cars. I think repairing cars is more important! Although there are many 4S shops and auto repair shops and the competition is fierce, the factory I want to open is ready to integrate the proprietary technology of all auto repair shops. Do you think I can get rich?

The first is positioning. Insufficient funds, it is temporarily impossible to open a 4S shop. Although there are more and more private cars, I don't want to focus on them, including taxis. Their master's money is too tight to be robbed. Public funds still have great potential. Even if the bus is reformed, it will not disappear for a while. But now some public enterprises and institutions have begun to control costs, and automobile maintenance has also started bidding. So the garage I want to open is to decorate the workshop luxuriously and completely, and even have beer and coffee, just like a villa, and guarantee to win the bid!

Dealing with the public is absolutely inseparable from public relations. I not only reserve funds for entertaining guests and kickbacks, but also plan to invest in opening a boutique in the factory, not to mention mobile phones, alcohol and tobacco, even Longines watches, Cartier pens, Dzheniya clothes and CD lipsticks! As for the flexibility of accounts, it is definitely a necessary condition for selecting accountants. If you change the three filters, you can issue invoices for power and gearbox overhaul, and 50% of the extra money will be divided, making a lot of money!

To open a garage, you must pull a few powerful people into the stock. I have thought of this way for a long time. Powerful people are the god of wealth, even if they are given shares. One million dollars, no worries about repairing cars, no worries about making money! In addition to those large state-owned enterprises and institutions, there are also public security, taxation, industry and commerce, quality and technical supervision bureaus, insurance companies and so on. Are our common goals!

After talking about positioning, let's talk about the business direction. I have set a principle: change is the main thing, and cultivation is the auxiliary thing. To put it bluntly, as long as a sick car comes to see a doctor, we will change parts. Repair? It's troublesome and you can't make money. I am too lazy to do it! It's still a mystery about changing parts. If you do not change them, you can change the assembly. Of course, changing parts should also talk about art. For those repeat customers and old drivers, be careful when proposing to change parts, at least hint at it and don't cause disputes. For those novices and passers-by, you are welcome. Reach out and get a knife!

A few days ago, I wrote an article about "accessory black hole" on TOM Auto Network. The secret of buying accessories is great! Of course, you have to talk about three, six, nine and so on. If you look pleasing to the eye, change it for him; If it looks awkward, change it for him. Anyway, if I buy auto parts, I must have my "points". There are several price points for the same part, but when I really switch to the car, the variety and price are up to me ... but if this secret leaks out, people who come to repair the car will go to the parts market to feel the market, so they will be hard to be fooled!

You can't open a garage without employees. Don't call them "repairmen". How apt it is to call it "changing parts"! It's easy to find a coolie. Those children are apprentices, and it is ok to give them three heads and two hundred a month. As for the big job, I just want to hire a more skilled one, and one is enough! It doesn't matter whether "two workers" and "three workers" understand the mechanical principle or the circuit, as long as they listen to me wisely. In case of complex fault, let the craftsman take the lead so as not to smash my brand. The remaining small work is basically to remove the old parts and replace them with new ones, so that the pliers wrench can do it! Another task of the master is to scare smart car owners with professional terms, lure them into the "black hole" and give me money! The coolies also have a special task, that is, carefully select the old parts that have been replaced, and sell the waste if it is really not good; You can use it. Change to another car after washing. In this way, you can save a lot of money!

How to deal with the breakdown of high-end cars with complex technology? Well, it's very simple. Take the car away, then transfer it directly to the special repair shop, and then give it to the owner through my hand, which not only ensures the quality, but also makes me pay a fee by the way. It's simple!

Some people may say, in my words, don't say you can't drive the garage, you can send me to prison now! Haha, do you think those auto repair shops on the roadside are as kind and generous as you? They did better than I said. Where's Toka? Do not believe you find a reporter to do an interview and expose the inside story!

Now consumers are staring at the price of cars all day and paying little attention to maintenance. In fact, the huge profits of this black hole are no less than the sales of the whole vehicle. The little money you cut when you bought a car is not enough for the knife I killed here! I can kill you on the accessories, or I can kill you at work. In the case of lax management and system loopholes everywhere, it is a fool not to make money quickly! As long as you bring the car, it's basically up to me to decide what's wrong, how to repair it and how much it costs. The wire is broken. I can say it's a circuit board fault. I'll change it for you. I can say that the screw is loose and the connecting rod is deformed. I'll change it for you. I can say that the crack in the water pipe is blocked in the water tank. Let me check it for you ... You simple-minded car owner are simply my printing machine!

Finally, I must assure you: my relatives and friends, if there is something wrong with your car, please come. I don't look like an individual boss who specializes in "killing" dirty things Besides, I also believe that even if I kill you, can you have the cheek to bargain with me?

My garage is still in preparation, and I don't know what the prospect of doing such a business is. ...

To open a garage, you must go through the formalities at the industrial and commercial department.