Classical Chinese of self-proclaimed narcissistic classic sentences

1. Classical Chinese funny sentences 1. Haha, Mulan flies a plane. What plane does she fly? Boeing 747.

I resigned from Beijing last year and lived in Tokyo, where I was ill. There was no music in Tokyo, and Sima Guang was not heard at the end of the year.

3. Money is what I want; Beauty is what I want. You can't have your cake and eat it, and those who give up money for beauty are also.

I don't leave my grandfather here, I have my own place to leave my grandfather, and I don't leave my grandfather anywhere. I will go to the railway.

I was sick when I was a child, not when I was nine. Alone, as for the establishment of a new China. There are no handsome guys, and finally there are beautiful women. The door is weak and thin, and there is a rest at night.

Liu Suying's illness is often in the sky. Chen Shi urine soup, never expired.

7. Be soft when you catch the sacred dynasty; Li Kui JY, the former satrap, loved Fang La more. From the Secretariat in Leslie Cheung, a courtier and a slave.

8. The imperial edict is strict, and I am in charge of Altman. The whole universe forced me to hang myself. I must obey.

9. I can live for a hundred years without my grandmother; Grandma can live for a thousand years without a minister. Mother and son can't compare with turtles.

10. Chen Mi has two out of twenty this year, and Grandma has nine out of ninety this year. Please forgive my affair.

2. Say others think they are arrogant and narcissistic (`‐Ω ‐? Hello, typical funny sentence.

There are many sentences in this sentence.

For example, if I give you some sunshine, you will be brilliant, and if I give you some color, you will open a dyehouse, right? Both.

Satire at those narcissistic sentences.

The mirror can't hold your face.

Unsure people love narcissism.

Narcissists have never died a natural death since ancient times.

Give me a sarcastic remark about someone who pretends to understand.

The great Marx didn't know as much as you did.

In your knowledge, ask a blue cat a naughty question of three thousand.

Cameron resigned. It's a pity that you don't run for office.

You are Zhuge Liang in the past and two pigs in the future.

How to satirize those narcissists?

I don't know my height, I'm arrogant, I'm arrogant, I'm self-righteous, I'm arrogant, I'm a frog in the well.

The same great god taught me to express euphemistically and satirize my behavior. Sentences obtained by narcissists still need to hit the nail on the head, preferably 40 points long.

Draw drums and noisy streets, blue lights all over the city, and the first month shines in Yancheng. The night view of Jiangque in the capital of Qing Dynasty, with silver arrows and golden stems. Streets crisscross.

Go through Pingkangfeng and listen to the music slowly. Phoenix candle shines. There is no incense screen in that house.

For Luo Qi, I can vaguely recognize the old days, and the elegance has faded. Jiao Bo Ye Yan and Qiao Xiao still greeted each other on purpose.

It is difficult to write deeply and sincerely when the wall falls and everyone stands. I don't know, those famous officials have been arrested, and they have all been reduced in customs over the years.

How to satirize narcissists

She says the factory is beautiful, so you ask her: Where?

What beautiful eyes? Where are the eyebrows? What about your mouth? Face?

Although they are all beautiful, we always feel that we have almost everything together.

How to satirize narcissists skillfully?

For example, if he looks in the mirror, you say, don't look, the mirror will crack. Or Bajie is looking in the mirror again. A concrete analysis of the overall situation

Ask for a satire on narcissists.

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('ω') つ Why don't you talk (m9 \

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Seek language to satirize rich narcissists.

For example, if he looks in the mirror, you say, don't look, the mirror will crack. Or Bajie is looking in the mirror again. A concrete analysis of the overall situation

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3. Ask for a super classic and super narcissistic funny joke. Maybe this line is boastful in the first paragraph, but there is nothing to say in the second paragraph. I am a mature man, but I look young and burly, giving people the feeling of being a big brother. With a successful career, the boss takes a notebook with him everywhere. The car I took was more spacious than Lincoln, which made my cultural taste. I study the ancient history of China in my spare time. Especially in the Qing dynasty, I can keep up with the trend of the times. I often watch American movies, especially the kind of society that discusses life. I like to ponder the psychological activities of movie characters, and I often deal with upper-class people. I am bored, so I often observe the situation. I am very concerned about the details of ordinary people's lives and the wealth level of ordinary people. I pay attention to adjusting the inequality between the rich and the poor, which has aroused strong social repercussions. I heard that someone wanted to interview me. I have done too many interviews before, so I went to other places to hide and be quiet, just to cultivate my self-cultivation. You know, people of my level will definitely not go by train, but because of my great fame, the whole country knows that I was invited for an interview, and I was also responsible for eating and fitness for free. After I come back, I often surf the Internet. I don't have high requirements for my ideal partner. After you come, I will give you a lot of ice cream and build a family with you. I will never be hard on you. I will watch the stars with you at night. Come on, honey, when you first see me, you will be very satisfied! This description happens to be your dream life partner, so you meet on the same day and find that what he said is different from reality.

But when I asked him why he lied, he took out his self-introduction and explained it to me sentence by sentence, only to find out.

Note: I am a mature man-57 years old, but I look very young-with acne and a big figure. Being a boss-made my cultural taste-I used to sell cold drinks by an unnamed lake and study the ancient history of China in my spare time. Especially in the Qing Dynasty-I love to watch Princess Pearl, and I can keep up with the trend of the times-I know which cold drinks are selling well this year, and I often watch American movies. Pornography likes to ponder the psychological activities of movie characters-I often fantasize that I am the hero of porn, and I often deal with the upper class. I'm tired of it-the president of Peking University told me many times: "No stalls by the lake!" So I often observe the situation-so I will set up a stall in the residential area. I am very concerned about the details of ordinary people's lives-seeing whose doors and windows are not closed well and caring about their wealth level. Seeing what is valuable, I pay attention to adjusting the inequality between the rich and the poor-I have done too much-the whole country knows that I have been on the "National Pursuit" network of the Ministry of Public Security or invited to do interviews-I often surf the Internet-and keep looking for 4 19. I don't have high requirements for my ideal partner. As long as I am taller than me, I will. If I am about to melt, I will build a family with you-you will help me build a hut, and I will never be bad to you. -I don't want to watch it anymore.

4. What are the classic funny sentences in classical Chinese? 1. In the extremely cold place in the north, a woman sat on the wall and urinated. As a result, the urine froze and even * * * was tied to a stone. Call her husband and tell him yourself. If the husband is short-sighted and careless, he will not melt, even the gas will turn into ice, and his hair will freeze, which is puzzling. But he ordered his servant to cut it open, and said, "Look at the chisel carefully, it is a connection between hair and straight seam;" Attached to the horizontal seam is a beard. "

Two brothers went to the river to take a bath. My brother's penis was bitten by a water snake and could not be pulled out. My brother tried to cut with a knife. My brother said, "Look at the knife carefully! Two eyes are snakeheads; The one-eyed one is a scorpion. "

3. A maid accidentally farted in front of her master, who was very angry and wanted to scold it. Seeing that her ass is very white and she doesn't feel hot, she is not only forgiving, but also angry. Tomorrow, the Lord was in his study when he heard a knock at the door. He opened the door and looked at it. It was yesterday's maid. Asked why he came, he replied, "I farted again just now."

4. Those who have never been near a woman in their lives don't know what Yin is. Ask people, and they say, "It's like an eye standing upright." This man keeps it in mind. One day, I suddenly had sex with a prostitute. I don't know where the prostitute's house is. I ran to the street and saw an ophthalmic signboard with several eyes painted on it, which was accidentally placed horizontally, so I went to the prostitute's house for this reason. The doctor went into the inner channel to achieve his goal and was furious, giving his son a scolding. The man said, "Since it's not a brothel, how can you put so many bi samples outside?" .

5. A person is good at divination and likes humor. When a pregnant man or woman came to ask, she congratulated her and said, "This is an egg catcher." . The man is so happy that he is undoubtedly pregnant. And production, it is a woman. Because in the past, fortune tellers said, "Only men have eggs, only women have eggs, and those who have eggs are not women."

6. Husband and wife will do something, because they are not asleep because of their two sons. So let's give it a try. Between two sons, they shouldn't know that they want to do this. And sex, its mother is very happy, almost dead. A son suddenly laughed, and his mother was ashamed and sour. Another Confucius said, "Well played, well played. When her mother died, she didn't cry, but smiled. " .

7. An unmarried woman secretly asked her sister-in-law, "Are you quite happy about this?" ? Sister-in-law said, "What is the honor? Just for the gift of the duke of Zhou. "After marrying my daughter, I will go back to Ning. She saw her sister-in-law and said, "What a liar. ".

8. On the bride's first night, the groom was not very good at it, so he put his penis in without moving. The female * * * said, "Oh, no, it hurts!" ! The husband said, "Take it out"? The woman said, "Oh, no, it hurts!" ! The husband said, "What do you want?" ? The woman said, "Take it in and take it out." .

9. A woman stays up late and plays with eggplant in a bowl alone. The woman thought she knew she was bullied when she saw eggplant, but she was cursed. The neighbor said, "This is ugly. Please keep your mouth shut, madam. " . The woman said, "That's not what I said. I won't scold eggplant this time, and melon and gourd will come together in the future. "

10. Married women are rich and men are poor, and men are worried about their dependence on marriage, which leads everyone to rob relatives and mistakenly carry their aunts out. The woman shouted, "I was robbed!" " Aunt said on her back, "Yes, yes! Come on, don't believe him. "

1 1. Wedding night, farewell dinner. The next day, the chef looked at the desktop and didn't see the sugar man. Asking questions everywhere, the couple suddenly laughed. Xi Niang was there and asked, "What are you laughing at?" The woman replied, "No wonder a person's tongue was sweet last night."

12. A man happened to meet two boats, so he reached out of the window sill and hurt a finger, complaining to his wife. His wife told him in horror: "Remember not to pee when you meet two boats in the future."

13. Yong Dong is very filial, and God arranged a fairy to marry him. When the fairies sent them away, they all said, "Go down. If you have more filial piety, please send a letter. "

14. A woman complained to Guan Yun: "Pumping water from a well defiles it from behind." The official said, "Then why don't you come forward?" Answer: "If you stand up, you may lose your ears."

15. remarried, having sex for the first time, and then not feeling it. Ask her husband, "Are you going in?" He said, "Go in." The woman went on to say, "Well, I have a little pain."

I want to be a woman and find a man like me in my next life.

Do you use the word I to describe handsome? I am: handsome, charming, well-proportioned, young and rich, brave and powerful, invincible in the world, the first in the room, alone, invulnerable, the best, a jade-faced husband, different people have different opinions, a wise man sees wisdom, King Kong is not bad, SHEN WOO is wise and chivalrous. Once upon a time, through the ages, friends from the United States went to soup. Supreme, supreme, gorgeous, heroic, moral example, not drunk for thousands of cups, restless, knowledgeable, a man of great talent, the pride of all sentient beings, the world's master, aboveboard, selfless, shocking, the first hero, chivalrous master, anxious as the wind, quiet as the forest, sweeping as the fire, motionless as a mountain, known as pear flower pressing Haitang. QQ2857340996+