Give me a few jokes ~

1. (When boarding the plane, flight attendant MM greeted the guests at the gate, and a handsome guy came up ...) Flight attendant MM: "Welcome aboard. Which seat are you in? " Handsome guy: "I'm Scorpio, and you!" " "Stewardess (with a shy face):" Really, what a coincidence, I'm also a Scorpio ... "The passengers in the queue behind fainted. Flight attendant: "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to this flight. Please sit on the runway and fasten your seat belt. Our plane is about to take off ... "The passengers suddenly became cold ... 3. (The plane is taking off with a loud roar. Flight attendant A and flight attendant B are sitting in the first class chatting ...) Flight attendant A: "Look. Flight attendant A had to repeat it loudly again, but flight attendant B still shook her head to show that she could not hear. At this time, the passenger came over and leaned in the ear of stewardess B and said, "Miss, she said my nose hair was exposed!" " " -_-! ! 4. (The plane finally climbed into the sky and entered a stable flight state, and the stewardess began to deliver drinks ...) "Ding-dong ~" A male passenger rang the call bell. Stewardess: "What can I do for you, sir?" The male passenger was silent. It may be the first time to fly, and he is a little nervous. ) The flight attendant explained, "This is the call bell. If you need to press it again, we will help you in time! " The passenger man nodded. But before flight attendant MM returned to her seat, the call bell rang again. Stewardess MM turned around and saw the passenger man stand up and shouted at the call bell: "Coke with ice ~" Stewardess: ... 5. (Stewardess is delivering drinks ...) "Hello, madam! Would you like something to drink? The middle-aged female passenger said shyly, "No,no." So the stewardess whispered, "It's free." ... "Female passenger:" Ah? Free! I want a glass of orange juice, a cup of coke, a cup of coffee, and ... "After that, the female passenger thought about it and took out a bottle from her bag and said," Give me some more soy milk in it! I want to drink my plane ticket back. "The stewardess fainted ... stewardess:" Would you like orange juice or apple juice, sir? Passenger: "Do you have orange juice that tastes like apples?" "The stewardess continues to feel dizzy ... 7. (The stewardess is helping the wall to deliver drinks ...) The stewardess:" Hello, what can I do for you? Passenger: "Can I have a glass of water?" Stewardess: "Sure, mineral water?" Passenger: "Do you have any juice?" Stewardess: "OK, which do you want, orange juice or peach juice?" Passenger: "Do you have any coke?" Stewardess: "Yes, do you need ice?" Passenger: "Then give me a cup of coffee!" " "Flight attendant: @% $ @% 26amp* ...8. (Flight attendant MM takes two cups of coffee back? At this time, a passenger pointed out of the window and asked the stewardess, "Miss, what lake is this?" Flight attendant MM replied: "Coffee pot. "The passenger is dizzy ... 9. (Ding-dong, the call bell is ringing again ...) Passenger:" Miss, do you have nail clippers? Flight attendant: "Do you think I am Tinker Bell?" The cabin was silent and the plane flew smoothly. At this time, the captain's happy voice came from the radio ...) "Ladies and gentlemen, I am your captain. Welcome to this flight. What I want to tell you is ...! Oh, my God! " In the middle of the captain's speech, he suddenly let out a cry of KB. After that, the radio went silent. At this time, all the passengers were frightened, even the stewardess was at a loss, and the cabin was silent ... After a while, the captain's voice finally came on the radio: "Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry to scare everyone. There was an accident. When the stewardess brought me coffee just now, she accidentally spilled coffee on my shirt. I don't believe you, this is all wet! " At this time, an angry passenger in the cabin complained: "What is the shirt wet?" Look at my crotch! "The captain is dizzy ... 1 1. (Before you know it, it's time for dinner again, and flight attendant MM starts to deliver food ...) Flight attendant:" Sir, we have chicken rice and fish rice. Which one do you want? "passenger:" ribs! "+zP-% 26gt； @WK stewardess: "Sir, we have chicken rice and fish rice. Which one do you like? "passenger:" ribs! Stewardess (silent for a moment): "We have chicken ribs and fish ribs. Which one do you like? 12, (the stewardess continues to deliver food ...) The stewardess: "Which do you want, fish rice or pork rice? Passenger: "We want pigs, and he wants fish! ""13, (The stewardess keeps getting dizzy when delivering food ...) Stewardess: "Which do you prefer, beef or fish?" Passenger: "OK, I'll take the Niuhe." Stewardess: "It's cows and fish." Passenger: "Oh! Then I want' and fish'. " 14, (After dinner, the stewardess began to close the dishes ...) A passenger pointed to a clean plate (not even a leaf left) and complained, "Miss, your food is terrible, it's just dog food!" The stewardess was speechless ... 15. (Most passengers handed the plate to the stewardess, but a passenger by the window was indifferent, and the stewardess MM reached out, so ...) The stewardess: "Sir, would you please pass the plate?" The passenger replied proudly, "Are you a waiter or am I a waiter?" The stewardess politely replied, "Yes, sir! I am a waiter, but I am not a gibbon! " 16, (The plane flew over Beijing and was about to land ...) Before the plane landed, the stewardess had to do a good job of signing and stamping, but just after signing and stamping, a passenger asked the stewardess for coke. Stewardess: Sorry, we are all closed. The passenger replied angrily: "As for it! I just want a coke. Are you crazy? " Flight attendant: ... 17, (while the plane was still taxiing, the passengers had already stood up to get their luggage, and for the sake of safety, the flight attendant picked up the radio again ...) Originally, flight attendant MM should have said, "Ladies and gentlemen, our plane is still taxiing, please sit still and close the overhead luggage rack." As a result, when she was in a hurry, the broadcast became: "Ladies and gentlemen, our plane taxied well ..." At this time, the "Ding Dong ~" intercom rang again, and the captain's voice came from inside: "Who praised me?" The flight attendant fainted ... 18, (The plane finally stopped, and flight attendant MM always wanted to catch a bus to go to Dongzhimen KFC restaurant to date her boyfriend, so the radio sent the following warm tips ...) "Ladies and gentlemen, our plane has arrived at Beijing Dongzhimen KFC airport ... Goodbye ~" The passengers are crazy. ...

Take your time, the toothache will go away! ! ! !