Classical Chinese humorous stories

1. China Classical Humor Story Wolf Pu Songling Original text: A butcher comes home late, and the meat in the burden is exhausted, leaving only bones.

On the way, the two wolves traveled a long way. Eliminate fear and throw it at the bone.

The wolf has a bone to stop, and the wolf still comes from. After the re-voting, the post-wolf stopped and the former wolf came again.

The muscles and bones are exhausted, and the two waves drive together. Tu was embarrassed. He was afraid of being attacked by the enemy.

There is a wheat field in Gu Ye, where the landowner earns a lot of money. Tu Naiben leaned against it with a knife on his shoulder.

Wolves are afraid to go forward, eyeing each other. When I was a child, a wolf left and a dog sat in front of him.

After a long time, my eyes seem to be useless and very idle. Tu suddenly and violently, wielding a knife to cut the wolf's head, killed several times.

Fang wanted to go, but after turning to pay, a wolf hole was among them, which meant to tunnel in and attack the back. The body is half in, and only the tail is exposed.

After the slaughter, he died of a broken stock. It was the wolf who fell asleep before enlightenment, and covered it to lure the enemy.

The wolf was shocked, but was killed twice in an instant. What is the geometry of the beast? Stop laughing. At dusk, a butcher came back with meat, and a wolf came to see the meat. It seemed to be drooling and followed for miles.

Sudden fear shows that it is a blade, but not as good as it is; Walk, walk, walk out of it. If you don't plan to slaughter, instead of hanging a tree and taking it early, think about the wolf's meat.

Then hook up the meat and hang it between the trees, showing that it is empty. The wolf is the only one.

Tugui was so embarrassed that I went to get the meat and looked at the giant hanging from the tree in the distance, like a hanged man.

Big scary, wandering myopia, then the dead wolf is also. Looking up carefully, I saw that the wolf had meat in his mouth, which stung the wolf's upper jaw like a fish swallowing bait.

At that time, the price of wolf skin was high, more than ten gold. It is ridiculous to ask for fish from the wood, and the wolf will suffer.

A massacre at dusk, forced by wolves. Next to the road, there was a room left by night ploughing and rushed into the shadow.

The wolf extended his paw to it. Tu is in a hurry and can't go.

But you can die without thinking. It's just that the space of the knife is not enough, so I cut the skin under the wolf's paw and blow it by blowing.

When I tried to blow it away, I felt that the wolf was not very active, so I tied it with a belt. Out of sight, the wolf swelled like an ox, its legs were crooked and its mouth could not be closed.

Then take it back.

2. Humorous The art of people laughing in short stories in classical Chinese is mainly expressed through humor.

The essence of humor is funny, ridiculous and meaningful. Humor is the crystallization of human wisdom and an advanced emotional activity and aesthetic activity. Any plain and mediocre value orientation and stereotyped way of thinking have nothing to do with humor.

In real life, we can often see that the arguments between the two sides are fierce, tense and deadlocked, often because one or two humorous words from a third party can make both sides laugh, put down their words and make up. In lifeless and monotonous situations, people will laugh and laugh because of someone's humor, break this silence, activate people's tired and numb nerves, and thus create a vivid, healthy and interesting atmosphere.

Therefore, in a sense, humor is a mediator to solve human contradictions, a stimulant to enliven and enrich human life, an elegant spiritual activity and a beautiful behavior. The 68 humorous stories selected here reflect the social life and human feelings in ancient China, especially since the Middle Ages.

These jokes are illusory, real, revealing, critical, beautiful, ironic, ironic, explanatory and colorful, which bring people into an ancient and realistic fascinating world and thus obtain the greatest spiritual and emotional satisfaction. A meat thief went to Beijing to sell meat, stopped to urinate in front of a toilet on the side of the road and hung the meat outside.

Seeing this, the second man stole the meat. Before he went far, A came out of the toilet, grabbed B and asked B if he had seen anyone take his meat from the toilet.

B was afraid that A would see through, so he put the meat in his mouth early and said impatiently, "You are such an idiot! How to hang the meat outside the door without losing it? If you put meat in your mouth like me, is there any reason to lose it? " -Han Weiyuchun's "Laughing Forest" name game Xu Zhicai, the king of Xiyang in the Northern Qi Dynasty, is very eloquent, especially good at word games. When he is not the king, he tries to play with the king, a senior minister.

Wang laughed at the name and said, "Your name is Zhicai. What's the point? In my opinion, it is similar to call it' lack of talent'. " Hearing this, he immediately laughed at Wang's surname: "The word Wang is added to the left of the word, 呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄呄2157

Wang was tongue-tied and embarrassed. On another occasion, Xu Zhicai entertained guests, and Lu Yuanming was present.

During the dinner, Lu Yuanming made fun of his surname and said, "The word' Xu' means not entering the people (Wei added' Yu' and' Jin')." Immediately mocked Yuan Ming's surname-the word "Lu": "The word" Lu "means" An "printed a public character as" Lu ",and then matched it with a horse to make a donkey. "

Lu Yuanming was flushed and speechless, and the room was full of laughter. -Old title Sui Houbai's "Qi Yan Lu" Bird's Nest and Calf Hou Bai later became an official in the Tang Dynasty and often worked with people in solve riddles on the lanterns. Hou Baixian made three chapters for everyone: "What you guess must be a visible object; Second, you can't make empty explanations to confuse everyone; Third, if the explanation is finished, but you can't see this thing, you should be punished. "

Then he first made a riddle: "The back is as big as a house, the abdomen is as big as a pillow (the crossbar behind the car), and the mouth is as big as a cup." Everyone guessed for a long time, but no one guessed right. They all said, "Where is an object with a mouth as big as a cup and a back as big as a room?" There is no such thing. You must make a bet with all of us. "

Hou Bai finished gambling with everyone and explained, "This is the swallow's nest." They burst out laughing.

On another occasion, Hou Bai attended a large banquet. During the dinner, everyone asked him to make a riddle for entertainment.

What you guess can neither be strange nor difficult to understand, nor can it be abstract and untrue. Hou Bai replied, "There is something as big as a dog and looks like an ox.

What is this? "People are competing to guess, some people say it's a roe deer, others say it's a deer, but they all deny it. Let Hou Bai tell the answer.

Hou Bai laughed and said, "This is a calf." -The old title "Qi" by Sui Houbai asks for the name of Tianbao. In his early years, the famous secret supervisor He wrote to the court and wanted to retire to his hometown of Wuzhong.

Xuanzong Li Longji respected him very much and treated everything differently. When He Zhangzhi left, he said goodbye to Tang Xuanzong, and his eyes were full of tears.

Tang Xuanzong asked him what other requirements he had. Zhang Zhi said: "I know that Zhang Zhang has a son who hasn't been named yet. If your majesty gives it a name, I will be honored to return to China. "

Xuanzong said: "Faith is the core of Tao. Blessed people have faith. The son of Qing should be named Fu. "

Know the chapter and thank humbly. It took me a long time to realize. I thought to myself, "The emperor is so happy with me.

I'm from Wu, and the word' fu' is the word' claw' followed by the word' zi'. He named my son Fu, didn't he call my son's paw? -Gao Songyi's "Living in Groups" does not know what poetry is. Ai Zi likes to write poems.

One day, Ai Zi swam between Qi and Wei and stayed in a hotel. In the evening, he heard someone talking next door: "A song."

After a while, he said, "One more song." Ai Zi was baffled and sleepy all night.

Lying until dawn, * * * heard the man in the next room say about six or seven times, that is, six or seven songs. Ai Zi thought that the man in the next room must be a poet. He was quietly absorbed in poetry at the foot of the mountain, and he felt respect in his heart. He also liked this man's quick thinking and decided to get to know him.

Early in the morning, Ai Zi got dressed and got up, adjusted her crown belt and stood at the door to meet her. Soon, a peddler-like man came out of the next room, thin and ill.

Ai Zi was disappointed, thinking: With this respect, you look like a poet. Perhaps, people can't judge people by their appearances, and they can't guess blindly. He went up to him and asked, "I heard that Mr. Wang has many poems." Can I see them? "

The man said, "I'm a businessman and I never know what poetry is." Has refused to come up with poetry.

Ai Zi stubbornly said, "I heard you say' one' in the house last night, and then you said' one'. Isn't that a poem? " Hearing this, the man couldn't help laughing: "You misunderstood. Last night, my stomach was upset. Every time I have diarrhea, I can't find toilet paper at night, so I wipe it with my hands.

Diarrhea lasted all night, and my hands were dyed almost six or seven times. When I say' hand', I don't mean the first poem. "

Ai zi, listen.

3. China's classical humorous story Wolf

Pu Songling

Original text:

Ah Zai came home late, and all the meat in his burden was eaten, leaving only bones. On the way, the two wolves traveled a long way.

Eliminate fear and throw it at the bone. The wolf has a bone to stop, and the wolf still comes from. After the re-voting, the post-wolf stopped and the former wolf came again. The muscles and bones are exhausted, and the two waves drive together.

Tu was embarrassed. He was afraid of being attacked by the enemy. There is a wheat field in Gu Ye, where the landowner earns a lot of money. Tu Naiben leaned against it with a knife on his shoulder. Wolves are afraid to go forward, eyeing each other.

When I was a child, a wolf left and a dog sat in front of him. After a long time, my eyes seem to be useless and very idle. Tu suddenly and violently, wielding a knife to cut the wolf's head, killed several times. Fang wanted to go, but after turning to pay, a wolf hole was among them, which meant to tunnel in and attack the back. The body is half in, and only the tail is exposed. After the slaughter, he died of a broken stock. It was the wolf who fell asleep before enlightenment, and covered it to lure the enemy.

The wolf was shocked, but was killed twice in an instant. What is the geometry of the beast? Stop laughing. At dusk, a butcher came back with meat, and a wolf came to see the meat. It seemed to be drooling and followed for miles. Sudden fear shows that it is a blade, but not as good as it is; Walk, walk, walk out of it. If you don't plan to slaughter, instead of hanging a tree and taking it early, think about the wolf's meat. Then hook up the meat and hang it between the trees, showing that it is empty. The wolf is the only one. Tugui was so embarrassed that I went to get the meat and looked at the giant hanging from the tree in the distance, like a hanged man. Big scary, wandering myopia, then the dead wolf is also. Looking up carefully, I saw that the wolf had meat in his mouth, which stung the wolf's upper jaw like a fish swallowing bait. At that time, the price of wolf skin was high, more than ten gold. It is ridiculous to ask for fish from the wood, and the wolf will suffer. A massacre at dusk, forced by wolves. Next to the road, there was a room left by night ploughing and rushed into the shadow. The wolf extended his paw to it. Tu is in a hurry and can't go. But you can die without thinking. It's just that the space of the knife is not enough, so I cut the skin under the wolf's paw and blow it by blowing. When I tried to blow it away, I felt that the wolf was not very active, so I tied it with a belt. Out of sight, the wolf swelled like an ox, its legs were crooked and its mouth could not be closed. Then take it back.

4. Witty answer in classical Chinese 1? A brief introduction to the text. The Son of Yang is selected from Shi Shuo Xin Yu in the Southern Dynasties. This is a novel that mainly records the anecdotes of gentry from the late Han Dynasty to the Jin Dynasty. This article tells the story of a nine-year-old boy in a family named Yang in Liang State. The main idea of the story is this: there is a family named Yang in Liang State, and there is a nine-year-old son who is very clever. One day, Junping Kong came to visit his father. Junping Kong called the child out. The child brought Junping Kong fruits, including bayberry. Junping Kong pointed to Yangmei and said, "This is your fruit." The child immediately replied, "I haven't heard that peacock is your bird." The story is simple, humorous and interesting. The purpose of choosing this class is to expose students to classical Chinese and have a preliminary understanding of classical Chinese. The second is to understand the meaning of ancient Chinese; Third, let students feel the humor of the characters' language in the story. The teaching focus of this lesson is to guide students to read the text fluently, understand sentences and appreciate the humor of the characters' language. Sentence analysis. Understanding of (1) sentence. Yang's son, nine years old, is very clever. This sentence points out the characters and characteristics of the article and plays a role throughout the whole text. Junping Kong is interested in his father, but when his father is away, he will shout loudly. Judging from the fact that Junping Kong came to visit the child's father, the relationship between the two families is very good, and they often go back and forth. So when you know this child, it is natural to know from the context that this child has brought fruit to Junping Kong. It seems that the child is very polite and good at entertaining guests. (4) Confucius pointed out to his son and said, "This is the fruit of your family." The son replied, "I didn't know peacocks were masters of poultry." This is the key part of the story. When Junping Kong saw Yangmei, he thought of the child's surname and deliberately teased the child and said, "This is the fruit of your family." It means your surname is Yang. This simple joke is very humorous. The child replied, "I haven't heard that peacock is your bird." Where is the clever answer? Junping Kong made a fuss about surnames, and so did the children. The peacock thought of Kong's surname: The best thing is that he didn't directly say "Peacock is a family poultry", but took a negative way, saying "I haven't heard of peacock as a family poultry", and tactfully answered, which not only showed due courtesy, but also expressed the meaning of "Since Peacock is not your bird, Yangmei is the fruit of my family", leaving Junping Kong speechless. Because he wants to admit that the peacock is his bird, what he said is tenable. The language is humorous. "Poultry" in the sentence is different from "Poultry" now, and "home" and "Poultry" here express their meanings independently. (2) Understanding of words. Last name, the word representing family. Master: Used as a courtesy title for a scholar or teacher. Setting: Placement and decoration. 1? Can write 6 new words and know 3 new words. Can read and write words such as "poultry" correctly. Read the text with emotion. Recite the text. Can understand the words and phrases according to the notes, understand the content of the text, and appreciate the children's cleverness in handling the language in the story? 55000000600606 This is the first time that primary school students come into contact with classical Chinese. Learning this article should focus on guiding students to read the article correctly, and pay special attention to the appropriate pause. Examples are as follows:/Yang/Nine years old, very smart. /Yi/His father, father/is not here, and Nai/Hoor is out. Set fruit, fruit/bayberry for/. Confucius/Pointing at Xiuzi/Yue: Although the text is concise, it is less than 100 words, but it is difficult for students to understand the meaning of ancient and modern words. It is suggested to take the following steps to help students understand the meaning of the passage: (1) Students try to read the passage, and the teacher gives a reading demonstration according to the students' reading situation to help students read the passage smoothly on the basis of correct reading. (2) After reading the text, students should understand the meaning of each sentence according to the notes, illustrations and context. Is "Poultry" the current "Poultry"? Let students understand the context. After students understand the content of the text, guide them to read and recite the text with emotion. In reading, they can appreciate the beauty of nine-year-old children's answers and exchange experiences on this issue. Teachers can guide students to compare "Peacock is the owner's poultry" and "I don't know if Peacock is the owner's poultry", and experience the tactfulness and wit of children's answers. Other short stories about speech expression in Shi Shuo Xin Yu. There are three words that are easy to make mistakes, so we should pay special attention to them. According to the actual situation of writing, students should be reminded that "Yue" can't be written as "Day", and "Hui" and "Bird" should not only be written as symmetrical structures, but also pay attention to the correctness of strokes. There are two polyphonic words to guide students to read correctly. One is to read "wèi" for "sitting fruit", and the other is to read "should" and "answer". Regarding "comprehensive learning", I sorted out the tips of comprehensive learning after class. The purpose of this comprehensive study is to remind teachers that this comprehensive study should start from the teaching of this class and run through the whole group. The purpose of this comprehensive study is to guide students to discover and collect exquisite languages after class, accumulate and learn to use artistic and attractive languages through various forms of Chinese activities, and feel the richness and beauty of the motherland's language! To organize this comprehensive study, we must first mobilize the enthusiasm of each student, guide students to define tasks and methods, and implement group division of labor and activity arrangements. We can independently determine a certain activity mode according to learning tips, such as collecting idioms and essays; Collect tips and advertising words and write advertising words; Collect wonderful dialogues from cross talk, storytelling or film and television dramas and perform them. Secondly, in the process of activities, teachers should grasp the information in time, adjust and guide in time. Students can maintain a positive activity mentality through daily communication with students, calling group leaders to report the progress of activities, organically combining with text learning, and summarizing in time. They really should give students a stage to show their learning achievements and a "display platform" must have a lot of "review and expansion".

5. Recommend several humorous stories in classical Chinese and their translations. 1. The Taoist priest, monk and beard who broke down crossed the river.

Suddenly, when the wind blew, the boat was about to capsize, and monks and Taoists panicked. They threw the scriptures into the river and asked God for help. There is nothing to throw at the beard, just tear it off one by one and throw it into the river.

The monk asked, "What's the use of pulling out a beard?" The man said, "I throw my hair (anchor) here." A Taoist priest, a monk and a bearded man were crossing the river when suddenly they met a strong wind and the boat was about to capsize.

Monks and Taoists are afraid. Hurriedly throw the scriptures into the river and ask God for help.

Beard had nothing to throw, so he tore it off and threw it into the river. The monk asked him, "Why did you pull out your beard?" The beard replied, "I threw my hair here."

2. Crossing the bridge, a villager came back from the city and said that his wife said, "I sneezed countless times in the city." The wife said, "I miss you at home."

He walked across the dangerous bridge with dung on his shoulder every day. After repeating it several times, he almost slipped. Instead, he scolded, "Sao Hua Niang, even if you miss me, you have to see what it is!" " A countryman came home from the city and said to his wife, "I sneezed several times when I was in the city." The wife said, "That's all because I miss you at home."

One day, he picked up a load of dung and walked across a rickety bridge. Suddenly he sneezed a few times and almost fell into the river. He scolded: "this slut, even if I want to, I have to see where it is!" " 3, deaf-mute, deaf-mute, each wants his own embarrassment. If you have been deaf for a day, you can sing a song and the dumb will know that you are deaf. You can tie a knot by opening and closing your lips and clapping your hands. The deaf will listen for a long time.

Seeing that his lips stopped, he praised: "Wonderful, wonderful. I haven't heard good news for a long time, and today is even better. " The deaf envy him for being deaf, and the dumb envy him for being dumb.

One day, the deaf saw the mute and begged him to sing a song, which was actually a mockery of his shortcomings. Knowing that the other person is deaf, the mute closes his lips one by one, beats his hands and pretends to sing.

The deaf also pretend to listen. Seeing the mute's lips motionless, he praised him and said, "Great, I haven't heard your wonderful singing for a long time, and I have made progress today." 4. Yawning A deaf-mute went to visit a friend.

The dog barks when it sees it. He was at a loss.

Meet the host. After the ceremony, he said, "Your family respects dogs. I don't think they slept last night. "

The host asked, "What do I think?" Answer: "When I saw my brother, only 32313353236313431303231363535858685e5aeb93133336396339 called. A deaf man went to visit his friend. His dog saw him barking, but the deaf man didn't notice.

After entering the back room to see the owner bow to each other, he said to the owner, "Does your dog think he didn't sleep last night?" The host asked, "What do I think?" The deaf man said, "The dog kept yawning when he saw his little brother." 5, asking for directions, getting lost in myopia, seeing a crow resting on the roadside stone, suspecting that it is also a person, so he repeatedly yelled at it.

After a while, the crow flew away, and the man said, "I asked you to disagree. Your hat was blown away by the wind, so I won't tell you." A nearsighted man lost his way and saw a crow standing on a stone by the roadside. He thought it was a man, so he asked for directions.

I asked several times, but no one answered. After a while, the crow flew away.

Myopia said to himself, "Hum, I asked you if you didn't agree just now. Your hat was blown away by the wind, so I won't tell you. " .