Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - The professor gave a lecture to the students.
The professor gave a lecture to the students.
A wolf came up and asked, Rabbit, what are you writing?
The rabbit replied, I am writing a paper.
The wolf asked again, what is the topic?
The rabbit replied, I'm writing about how rabbits eat wolves.
The wolf laughed and said he didn't believe it.
The rabbit said, come with me. Brought it into the cave.
Then the rabbit continued to write in front of the cave. Then came another fox.
Rabbit, what are you writing?
The rabbit replied, I am writing a paper.
The fox asked: What's the topic?
The rabbit replied: How does the rabbit eat the fox?
The fox laughed after hearing this, expressing disbelief.
The rabbit said, come with me and take it into the cave.
After a while, the rabbit went out of the cave alone and continued to write its paper.
At this time, in the cave, a lion is sitting on a pile of bones and picking his teeth, while reading the rabbit's paper: the ability of an animal depends not on its strength, but on who is its boss behind the scenes!
I used to live in a bungalow, separated from my neighbor by a fence. One day, I found my dog dragging something with its mouth under the fence. I'm afraid it can't find something clean to eat again, so I went to have a look. To my surprise, the dog is dragging a rabbit towards us. I recognized the sign hanging from the rabbit's neck at a glance, which was raised by the little girl in the neighbor's house.
The first thing she does when she comes back from school every day is to run to the rabbit's cage, let it out and play with it.
"Now we are in trouble!" I think I'm annoyed that I didn't tie the dog up this afternoon.
Fortunately, the little girl hasn't finished school yet, and I reacted quickly enough to come up with an idea at once. I managed to snatch the dirty rabbit from the dog's mouth. Obviously, it died after a struggle.
"Poor rabbit!" I want to put it in a basin, wash it with shampoo, comb its hair neatly with a comb, and then dry it with a hair dryer. Then, in the last step, I climbed over the fence, went to the neighbor's deserted yard, put the dead rabbit back in the cage, and wanted it to look like a natural death.
Soon, the little girl was picked up by her father from school. I hid in the house and watched her movement through the curtains: she looked as worried as usual and walked slowly to the cage.
"Dad-Dad-!" She shouted.
"This is the time!" I thought to myself, I ran out of the house and rushed into the yard, asking with concern what had happened. Good neighbors like me always appear at this time, so their family has always had a good impression of me.
Through the fence, I saw my father and daughter staring blankly at the cage. Then when I asked, the father looked back at me and pointed to the cage and said, "Who do you think would do such a thing? God damn it, he dug up my daughter's rabbit that died yesterday from its grave! "
One night, an old friend I haven't contacted for a long time made a long-distance call from Beijing and invited me to her "love question and answer" with a smile. Seeing that she was in such high spirits, I readily agreed.
She gave me several things: a house, a rabbit, a tiger and myself. Let me make up a story by instinct. I thought about it and said, "There is a tiger chasing me. I was so scared that I quickly threw the rabbit to the tiger, and then I ran into the house to hide ... "
The old friend smiled and said, "Wow, you are really a conservative! To tell you the truth, the tiger represents your husband, the rabbit represents your lover, and the house represents your family. It seems that you are a housewife and it is unlikely that you will have an affair in the future. "
After hearing what she said, I felt quite satisfied, so I repeatedly said, "That's it!" " "The old friend suddenly said mysteriously on the phone," Hey, ask your boyfriend this question and see what he says ... "I think, yes, this is just a test for him.
Boyfriend comes back from work. As soon as he stepped into the house, I greeted him and pulled him to the sofa and sat down. I can't wait to know his answer to this question, which is what I expect. Who knows his story turned out to be: "In the forest, I saw a tiger chasing a rabbit. I quickly opened the door, let the rabbit run in and hide, and then drove the tiger away ... "
After listening to my boyfriend's story, I was not only disappointed, but also sad. I kept calling him heartless, but he was puzzled. After hearing my angry explanation, my boyfriend smiled. He gently pointed his finger at my forehead and said, "Oh, who told you to be a tigress?" Can't you be gentle? " Looking at my boyfriend's serious expression, I said to myself, "Yes, why do you want to be a tigress!" "
The next day after work, my boyfriend smiled all the way home. I asked him what made him so happy. He laughed almost out of breath and said, "There is no happy event, but do you know how our boss made up that story?"
I shook my head.
"He said, I was walking on the road and saw a fierce tigress. I learned from the hero Song Wu, and killed him with three strikes, five divisions and two divisions. When I get home and open the door, wow! A room full of rabbits! "
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