I am bored to death. Do you have any jokes?

1: the math teacher's trademark action

Put up two fingers and say to the students, "Students, the key to learning math well is three words!" " ! ! Do more exercises! ! A few days ago, I said that my girlfriend was as stupid as a pig. She twisted me, which was very painful and she never let go. When I'm in a hurry, I'll tell your mother that you abuse pigs! 3: One day, I went to worship Guanyin with my parents and younger brother.

I didn't wake up, just come forward to say:

Suffering Guanyin ...

Mom and Dad:->-|||

Brother:->-||||

Bodhisattva: T _ _ T _ _ _ T ||||||: When I was a sophomore in FoxPro class, a teacher began to count how many people were in our class.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, tick ... (suddenly stops) 5: One day, my dear mommy asked me to buy peppers.

Mommy: "Go and buy a catty of peppers."

Even: "A catty! Why buy so much? "

Mommy: "Nonsense ~ To cook! ! ! "

I was depressed and surprised when I went out to buy it. When I left, I specifically asked, "Are you sure you want to buy a catty?" ! "

Answer my eyes! anxious ...

When I arrived at the vegetable market, the more I thought about it, the more wrong I was. Why did you buy a catty of peppers? Too many, isn't it? ! Take out your cell phone.-Confirm again!

The answer is still the same: a catty of pepper! ! !

28 yuan, a kilo of peppers, the boss weighed and bagged me. I was about to pay when the phone rang ~ ~ ~ Mom? !

I only heard the roar on the phone: "Wrong! No! ! Not a catty, not a catty, but one or two! ! ! "

Sweat! ! ! !