Joke Collection Website - Public benefit messages - Live funny copy

Live funny copy

1. I hope to win a person's heart and avoid old blind dates.

The furthest distance in the world is not between life and death, but after the holiday, you can't recognize me!

My ex-boyfriend is getting married, so he called me to ask if I can go. I decisively replied to him: next time.

Be strong. Failure is also a part of success. Where you fall, you are wrong.

Today, I told my dad that I wanted to get a driver's license and buy a car. My dad is so excited! Tell me, daughter, how expensive it is to hit people now. Dad can't afford it.

6. I know from your words that you haven't learned much.

7. Do you know what to pay attention to when selling cute? Watch your appearance!

Everything in this world can be fake, but the only thing I can't stand is that the money in my hand is also fake.

9. Why is the Monkey King always so thin in Journey to the West? The Great God replied: Because he burned his calories in the blast furnace of Taishang Laojun!

10. A big face also has the advantage of a big face: Lao Wang was beaten in the bathroom yesterday, and the other party tried to push him into the toilet to drink water, but it was unsuccessful.

1 1. There is really no coat like a school uniform. You can hide your mobile phone in your sleeve, put your book in your pocket, roll a pillow, spread it out as a blanket, and dare to rub it anywhere.

Twelve. When my parents were young, they owed others a lot of money. Every time they say to people, "We will pay you back twice." Later, they gave birth to me and named me Shuang.

Thirteen. I dreamed of Yue Lao last night and asked him, "Why don't you give it to my boyfriend?" Yue Lao looked at me and said, "The red rope is short and the legs are thick. I can't tie it."

14. Men like women's beautiful faces, and women like men's sweet words, so women learn to make up and men learn to lie.

Fifteen. I have been out for several years, from the first month of 2000 to the later 1 10,000,50,000,110,000,500,000. I never thought I owed so much.

What is the pain that can be felt? I just feel so hungry, but I still feel like a lump of meat.

17. The crowd searched for her for thousands of Baidu, and suddenly looking back, the man was in the marriage registration office.

I've been working outdoors recently, and I'm all tanned. I went to the supermarket to buy some whitening skin care products, and the salesman even praised me: "You speak Chinese really well."

My husband and I have a very good relationship. Every night when we sleep, he will use his arm as my pillow and hug me tightly to sleep. Then came scapulohumeral periarthritis. I have cervical spondylosis. Seeing others working so hard, so diligent and so energetic on the road to success, ask yourself, don't you want to be a stumbling block to them?

Twenty one. The night in MUBI may not be long, but I want to eat a lot.

Twenty-two I went to practice driving yesterday. The coach told me that there was a puddle in front of me. I don't know what happened to my brain at that time, so I put my hands on the steering wheel and lifted my feet.

23. I met my father-in-law when I bought a washboard in the mall. My father-in-law sighed deeply when he looked at Erpang, and asked the clerk to pick the one with the worst quality and hand it to him. He patted him on the shoulder and said meaningfully, Son, I was young once. ...

Twenty-four My mother-in-law came to my house the other day. In the evening, my wife cooks in the kitchen. My mother-in-law secretly gave me 500 yuan and said to me, "Dear son-in-law, my daughter is very careful. I'll give you some pocket money, which is also private money. " I was moved and whispered, "Mom, I have my own money …" Then my daughter-in-law came in and said, Mom, go home first. I have something to say to your good son-in-law …