Joke Collection Website - Public benefit messages - My daughter is a sophomore, but she doesn't like studying more and more. What should I do? Is there any good encouragement method?
My daughter is a sophomore, but she doesn't like studying more and more. What should I do? Is there any good encouragement method?
Having learning motivation is the source for students to learn knowledge well. Learning motivation has always been one of the important fields of educational psychology and teaching theory and practice, and it is also an urgent problem for parents and teachers to solve. What is the relationship between learning interest and learning motivation?
First, the four major reasons for children's lack of motivation to learn.
Many parents of primary and middle school students will worry about urging their children to study hard, and always think that their children are not active. Sometimes, it is even more doubtful whether children are born to dislike learning. In fact, children's learning motivation is innate. I believe parents will still remember that when their children were two or three years old, they always asked everything and were curious about the outside world. But why are older children less motivated to learn? School culture, assessment system, course content and teaching methods are all important factors, and parents' attitudes, behavior patterns and discipline methods can not be ignored. The following will analyze how parents unconsciously lose their children's intrinsic learning motivation through several examples.
1, when the child asks you questions. Will you tell him what you know at once?
If we do this, it will make them unable to realize their pleasure in finding answers, thus killing their inner learning motivation. At the same time, it will make them form the habit of dependence and easy to give up, and make them lose the ability of self-study.
2. When a child asks you to help with some exercises, such as collecting or sorting out information, will you help?
I believe many parents will help and even try their best to finish it as "parents' homework". However, children have lost a rare learning opportunity, learning communication and data processing skills through practice, and exerting multiple intelligences.
When the child tells you that he was bullied by his classmates. What would you do?
Most parents will teach their children to tell their teachers, and some parents will go to school to give that classmate a lesson in person. But will the above practices make children more dependent? Children may think that only relying on others, even authority, can solve problems. In fact, from another angle, we will find that the experience of children being bullied is a good learning opportunity. It can cultivate children's ability to solve problems, protect themselves and get along with others. Parents may wish to discuss with their children how to face this situation according to their mental maturity. We should listen to their feelings and ideas patiently and encourage them to think about solutions from different angles. If they put forward some inappropriate practices, such as revenge or aggressive actions, parents should spend more time asking questions to inspire them to think, try to guide their children to think and imagine the consequences of various schemes, and encourage them to reflect on whether they can bear the consequences. Finally, let the children practice the best plan they think and conduct an after-the-fact review.
4, whether when the child concentrate on doing an activity (such as reading novels, etc.). ) urge him to do his homework?
This seemingly natural thing has brought many negative effects. First of all, children will lose a chance to concentrate, which will make them lack of devotion and concentration in their studies, games or work. At the same time, because they think they can't continue their activities because of homework, they will feel disgusted with homework. On the other hand, they will also have some negative emotions, such as fidgeting, resisting or suppressing dissatisfaction. They will misunderstand their parents and think that they don't love themselves and don't understand themselves.
To avoid this dilemma, parents can often exercise their children's self-discipline ability. Through different forms, let children fully understand their rights and responsibilities and reflect on whether they can bear all kinds of consequences. Before the activity, encourage them to finish their homework, set their own time to finish the activity, and bear the consequences if they fail to reach the set goals. On the other hand, we should pay more attention to the significance of "learning from games" and children's sense of accomplishment. Don't forget to let children experience care and success.
From the above example, does it reflect that because we love and protect children too much, they have lost many learning opportunities? It also makes them suffer from "learning dependence", which makes the children's internal learning motivation and potential not fully exerted.
Second, how to find the poor performance of children's lack of learning motivation?
1. Avoid learning. Unwilling to attend classes, no sense of accomplishment, no ambition and expectation, no desire to learn and make progress.
2. Excessive anxiety. Lack of self-esteem, self-confidence, poor study and no shame.
3. Pay attention to dispersion. Lack of learning motivation will distract attention, divert interest and be easily disturbed by various internal and external factors. Therefore, they are interested in things other than study, spend time, and often usurp the role of master and reverse their priorities.
4. Boredom and indifference.
5. Lack of appropriate learning methods.
6. Learning without goals and plans.
Through the research of Chinese education experts, it is found that the lack of learning motivation has internal and external causes. The internal reasons are: (1) unclear learning motivation; (2) Not interested in major; (3) Wrong attribution. Specifically, external causes refer to reasons from society, schools and families. Some families are eager for quick success and instant benefit, and pay more attention to what majors they want their children to study, regardless of whether their children are interested in these majors and whether they are suitable for their children to study. These factors have a bad influence on students, and even become the hidden reasons for students to drop out of school.
Third, ways to effectively improve children's learning motivation!
The child has just passed the exam. Do you need a tutor to force the child to study? How to stimulate children to establish spontaneous learning motivation is believed to be a problem that many parents are trying to solve.
Judging from the successful experience of gifted scholars in Tsinghua, Peking University, self-confidence plays a great role in learning. Here are some ways to improve the self-confidence of talented scholars. Students can take one or more of the following measures according to their own situation, which will be effective.
1. Say "I can do it" in your heart. "I can do it."
Students with low self-esteem always think that they can't do it. Chinese can't, math can't, English can't, this can't, and that can't. The more you think you can't do it, the less confident you are. The less confident you are, the more boring you are, and even the broken cans are broken.
Some students, with poor learning foundation, always think that I didn't do well in the mid-term exam when the exam is about to expire. No, I can't do it well this time. Anyway, I didn't do well in the exam, so I was scolded by my parents and didn't want to review. Naturally, I still didn't do well in the exam.
In order to overcome inferiority and build self-confidence, we should say "I can do it, I can do it!" " ! Be decisive when meditating and repeating, especially when encountering difficulties. As long as you persist in meditation, especially nine times after getting up in the morning and nine times before going to bed at night, you will gradually build up your confidence and gain psychological strength through your positive hints.
"I was born useful", and other students can do it. Everyone has similar intelligence. As long as you work hard and use the right methods, your grades can be improved. As a matter of fact, a student with good academic performance will lose his academic performance even if he relaxes his efforts. If I work hard, my academic performance will improve.
2. Happiness is the product of self-confidence.
Every student has his own happy things. Happy things are things you have successfully accomplished, and they are the products of your confidence and strength. Every student has many happy things, and you should also think about your proudest and most successful things. For example, when you achieved excellent results in the 100 meter race, recall your psychological feelings at that time.
Occasionally, your academic performance is not ideal. Don't be depressed. You can recall your previous success, which shows that I am not stupid, but I can succeed. In this way, my heart will be steadfast and I will have strength. I believe I can still work hard.
Step 3 smile often
If you don't have self-confidence, you will often be sad, listless and glassy-eyed. Ambitious people, sparkling eyes, all smiles. People's facial expressions are consistent with people's inner experiences. Laughter is a sign of happiness. Laughter can make people have confidence and strength; Laughter can make people feel comfortable and cheer up; Laughter can make people forget troubles and get rid of them.
Learn to laugh, learn to smile, and learn to laugh when you are frustrated, which will enhance your self-confidence. Please carefully understand the psychological feeling of smiling. Please smile naturally in front of the mirror and feel your inner feelings. This method seems simple, but it really works. When you gradually get into the habit of smiling often, you will feel full of strength and confidence inside.
4. Don't be dejected and despondent
When people are frustrated and discouraged, they often feel depressed. Being depressed is a sign of lack of strength, failure and loss of confidence. Successful people, proud people, successful people hold their heads high and high spirits.
People's posture and inner experience are compatible, and the performance of posture and inner experience can promote each other. The more confident a person is, the more powerful he is, and he will hold his head high. The less strength a person has, the more self-abased, listless and depressed. Learn to hold your head up naturally, and you will gradually build up your confidence and enhance it.
5. Take the initiative to interact with people
Say hello when you meet someone. Usually, if you ask others how you are, they will ask you how you are. If you smile at others, they will smile back at you. We seldom see you greet others with a smile, and others will say "you are not good" with a straight eyebrow, which is not in line with human nature. Greet with a smile, and both sides will feel the warmth and true feelings of the world, which will make people full of strength and increase their confidence.
Enjoy inspiring music.
Everyone will have such an emotional experience. When they hear magnificent and passionate songs, they are often enthusiastic and excited because they are inspired. When you hear deep and tragic sorrows, you often feel sad and nostalgic.
Healthy music can mediate people's emotions, cultivate people's sentiments and cultivate people's will. When students are frustrated, depressed and lack confidence, choosing appropriate music to enjoy can help them cheer up.
Fourth, why don't children have a good interest in learning?
Stimulating children's interest in learning is first related to the cultivation of "curiosity". Curiosity means liking to touch new things. The more a person is exposed to new things, the more he wants to know. Want to know more is the source of learning motivation. But many times parents don't encourage or even suppress their children's curiosity. When parents take their children to the streets, he may point to the east and ask them to look, but usually he will add, "But don't look too long." Sometimes, when children observe things, parents will block them. The reason why children stop asking the second question after asking their parents the first question is because they know that their parents don't like them to ask questions, but asking questions is actually the source of learning motivation.
Therefore, parents should not only suppress children's curiosity, prohibit children from asking questions, but also encourage children; Because he has grown up, he doesn't necessarily want to know so much. Parents should also take their children to the streets to expose them to new things. Of course, if parents are very curious and love to ask questions, it will have a greater impact on their children.
1, set an example
If parents themselves are people who don't ask questions and don't like to seek answers, their children certainly don't have rich experience in asking people and won't ask more than two questions. So "setting an example" is really important, and "setting an example" should apply to parents' reaction to "mistakes". Whether parents "know what is right", "It doesn't matter if they are wrong, ask others about me" or "Let's start from the beginning" ... These concepts are the most important, not saving face, never admitting mistakes, but only bluffing.
Are you the kind of parent who goes to court whenever a child does something wrong? 90% of parents are extremely nervous about 65 and 56 points on their children's report cards. Whenever their children get back their test papers and report cards, they will suddenly ask, "How many points?" In this way, children either comfort their parents in turn or cover up their low scores, both of which will only lead to a decline in learning motivation.
In addition, the method of "using characters to illustrate why children want to learn" is also good. Parents can also tell their children about the occupations of all their relatives and what kind of education these occupations require. This makes children realize the importance of learning knowledge after they feel the real success.
2. The relationship between environment and learning emotion.
Studies have shown that children from well-off families, especially boys, have higher academic performance in their early years than children from low-level families. This shows that the environment will affect the mood of learning. Boys and girls are different in this respect: girls must sit in a fixed position and concentrate on their studies, and they often find it difficult to adapt to the new environment; Boys can go there and study there.
Even in the environment of playing strong songs, you can still read. As a parent, you should pay attention to these details.
V. 18 Ways to stimulate children's interest in learning!
It is very important to improve children's learning motivation: how to stimulate and improve children's learning interest. So how can we help children? How to improve your interest in learning? Every parent wants his children to study easily and get good grades. But it is often not satisfactory. Some children have a headache when it comes to study. They are afraid of reading, doing homework and writing. Under these circumstances, many parents are very helpless and helpless. What causes children to be tired of learning? In fact, the main reason is that children are not interested in learning. Interest in learning is the most practical motivation to promote children's learning, which can urge children to study consciously. Generally speaking, children's interest in learning, academic performance and learning confidence complement each other. If children are interested in a certain subject, their academic performance will be good and their learning confidence will be sufficient. Therefore, it is very important to cultivate children's interest in learning. How to cultivate children's interest in learning?
1. Respect children's interests.
Nowadays, many parents try their best to let their children learn well and know more from the moment they enter school, so parents arrange their children's weekends and holidays to be full. In fact, it is good for children to learn more, and parents have good starting points. But does your child like studying? Parents, regardless of their children's feelings, make their children study very hard and don't want to learn. Children are like all kinds of saplings, some like pine and cypress seedlings, some like willow seedlings, some like banyan seedlings and so on. No matter what sapling, it can grow into various materials. Therefore, the responsibility of parents is not to force their children to learn this and not that, but to give them more free and relaxed space to choose what they are interested in. For example, some children like to do some hands-on operations and make some small productions. And parents think it has nothing to do with learning, so they stop, restrict and prohibit it. In fact, children also need to use their brains in the production process. When they don't understand, they will consult relevant materials and books. This is the process of learning. This kind of study will make children learn consciously and happily. Moreover, in such activities, they will not only develop their thinking ability, but also improve their hands-on operation ability. Parents should not only stop them from doing this, but also provide them with relevant books according to their children's interests and create opportunities for their children to participate in some beneficial activities and competitions.
Many facts have proved that the interest cultivated as a child often lays the foundation for a lifetime career. Some parents place great hopes on their children, but often "prescribe" their interests according to their own subjective wishes, instead of respecting the development law of their own learning interests, which often delays their development.
2. Pay attention to linking children's original interests with knowledge learning, and cultivate and stimulate new interests.
Some children have a headache when they hear writing a composition, so they are assigned to write this. He said that he had never done it. When he wrote that, he said that he had never been there or seen it, and he didn't know how to describe it. In fact, there are many things that children really haven't experienced and haven't experienced personally, but they have to write, so they have to copy this composition book and that composition book. When they really can't find a copy, they just scribble a few words to deal with it, and it becomes a real composition. But like the child mentioned just now, he likes to operate by hand. If his parents support him to do it and provide him with relevant books, he has read a lot and done a lot. If you really want him to write, he will be handy when he writes, and the articles he writes will be more concrete, true and flesh-and-blood. He will write about his own production process, the joy of his success, how to overcome difficulties and so on. Therefore, parents should let their children participate in beneficial and favorite activities and link their children with learning. In short, parents should pay attention to linking their children's original interests with knowledge learning, and guide their children's interests to study, so as to cultivate and stimulate new interests.
3. Accurately judge the reasons why children don't like learning and help solve them.
The reasons why children don't like learning are complicated. If we discuss it, we will find that it is not that children don't like reading, but some factors, such as being criticized by teachers at school, being laughed at by classmates for reading wrong words, being forced to do homework if they want to watch TV and so on. After these reasons gradually accumulated in my heart, I gradually lost interest in learning.
Our parents should first communicate freely with their children and discuss with them why they don't like reading with a gentle attitude. Here, children can say anything, no matter how ridiculous his reasons are, parents should not scold or make fun of them. When a child tells all the reasons why he doesn't like reading, he will find that the reason why he doesn't like learning is not learning itself, but the environment related to reading and learning, such as being criticized by the teacher, being laughed at and wanting to watch TV. Parents know what his problem is, so they should help him solve it. For example, you can talk to the teacher about the children. When your child likes watching TV programs, letting him watch TV before studying can help him solve the obstacles in his study and restore his interest in learning.
4. Listen and talk to the children about their study life.
The new children are all new and interesting to the school. When they get home, they will tell their parents about their school life with great interest. At this time, parents should listen patiently and discuss school life with them, which is very important to cultivate their interest in learning.
5. Make the desk an interesting place for children.
Children need a good environment to study and do their homework, and a desk of their own is essential. Turning the desk into a place where children are interested will make children interested in the learning activities that are often carried out on the desk. The desk should be neat and tidy, and the tools needed to do all kinds of homework should be put in the drawer, so that he can find it immediately when he needs it, and he will not be upset because of the lack of a tool. The desk is beautiful and comfortable, and children will sit here and start learning activities as soon as they have time. Some parents often report to the teacher that their children are slow to do homework at home and often have to do homework until eleven or twelve. What should I do? The teacher asked the children how to do their homework at home. Some said that the children watched TV while doing their homework, some said that the children were doing their homework while playing, and some said that the children were listening to adults while doing their homework. These reasons are all factors that lead to children's slow homework. It is difficult for children to concentrate because of external interference. With adults talking around him, you can't concentrate on your homework well and your speed will be slow. No matter what the reason, parents must eliminate the interference that may affect their children's homework and give them a quiet learning environment.
6, each study time should not be too long.
At present, parents generally expect too much from their children. They want their children to study, study and study again. As long as the child sits at the desk, no matter how efficient it is, parents will feel gratified, so they always urge the child to "sit down and learn from scratch." As everyone knows, this practice is very dangerous. Ignoring children's psychological characteristics and extending the study time at will make children oppose learning and games, hate learning, have no interest in learning, and develop bad habits of procrastination and inattention. So parents should not be short-sighted, and don't forget that cultivating children's interest in learning is the top priority.
7. Encourage children to succeed. Improve children's sense of success.
Success is the motivation to make children feel satisfied and willing to continue learning. Once the child succeeds, he will feel satisfied and willing to continue his studies. Therefore, parents should encourage and guide their children to experience the joy of success. Every child's intelligence and acceptance are different. Parents should fully understand their children, set some easy-to-achieve small goals for their children according to their specific conditions, and let them feel that they can do it, so that they will have the confidence and motivation to do it and will succeed. When he shows the joy of success, he will have the interest and confidence to achieve his next goal. With the realization of small goals, children will continue to improve. Children should set goals. They should determine the direction step by step, and should not rush into it. Parents should patiently guide and give specific help, so that children can experience the joy of overcoming difficulties and achieving success. For example, after learning Pinyin and commonly used Chinese characters, children in lower grades can write a short message to their relatives far away, so that they can take time to reply to their children, so that they can taste the actual effect of learning and cultivate their interest in learning.
8. Try to let children create problems and enhance curiosity.
Children are the parties to learning, forced to study, forced to take exams, and learning is in a passive state. It is understandable that children are tired of learning for a long time. Parents can change their methods when guiding their children to learn. Instead of asking them to answer questions often, they can adopt the learning method of letting them create problems. This can not only change children's learning attitude, but also stimulate their interest in learning.
Try to let children create problems. Children will consider what is the main point, and parents can also take this as the center when guiding their children to learn. In addition, children usually ask questions that they fully understand or are proud of, which makes it easy for parents to know what their children are good at and what they lack. By adhering to this learning method, children will accurately grasp the learning requirements and problems in their usual study. In addition, it helps to improve children's expressive ability, satisfy children's self-esteem, and naturally get good grades in learning.
9. Let children be teachers. Provide opportunities to use knowledge.
Parents can study with their children, let them be teachers to teach parents, and try to exchange the status of teaching and being taught. Children standing in the position of the teaching side will increase their desire to learn. At the same time, in order to make both sides understand that they must study deeply and master the main points of learning content, which is of great help to their own learning.
10, start the game
"Competition" is an important driving force leading human actions. Instead of working hard, it is better to compete with your opponents and give full play to your potential. Conditional parents can let their children study and do homework with their classmates to see who writes fast and well. Children can also secretly find a classmate whose grades are slightly higher than their own, make up their minds and try to catch up with and surpass him step by step.
1 1. Open learning plan.
One way to quit smoking by using psychology is to publicly announce to family or friends: "I'm going to quit smoking!" " "Doing so will have a mandatory effect. When you can't help but want to smoke, you will immediately think: "Will others laugh at you for being weak-willed or too worthless? "So you can stick to it:" Anyway, you must stick to your plan. "The same is true for making a reading plan. Don't just make up your mind secretly, but publicly announce to your family or friends, "How can I study hard? "In this way, it will have a positive effect.
12, using the "reward effect" to stimulate learning interest
When you want to sleep, watch TV, eat snacks, etc. You can use this method in reverse. I set myself to satisfy my desire in the form of reward after reaching a certain goal or stage, that is to say, I can only do what I expect after reaching the prescribed level. In this way, you may concentrate on your studies in order to get rewards early, and shorten your study time as much as possible to get satisfaction. Happy memories like this are safer and more lasting than memorizing.
13. Discuss his future with your child. Can stimulate his willingness to read.
Every child will have a vision for his future. Parents might as well let their children fully express their hopes for the future, no matter how unrealistic. Parents and children discuss what knowledge they need to have in order to realize their ideals, so that children can understand that it is necessary to study hard for their future, thus stimulating their enthusiasm for learning.
14, understand children's learning ability.
Remember never to impose it on your children according to your ideal model. Every child has his own characteristics and the goal setting will vary from person to person. Even after the training goal is set, it should be constantly adjusted to keep it in the ideal mode.
15. Cultivate children's habit of making good use of their spare time.
In spare time, children feel that there is no pressure and their emotions can be alleviated. It is easier for parents to evaluate their children's real learning ability through observation. Parents can let their children arrange their own time, do something useful, and unconsciously form an interest in learning.
16. Parents must strengthen their curiosity.
Children are good at imitating close people, usually parents. Therefore, parents should not only pay attention to words and deeds, but also cooperate with words and deeds. The influence of eager parents on their children is immeasurable.
17, the relationship between parents' education style and children's interest in learning.
Parents should pay attention to their behavior and attitude. I often get beaten and scolded at home, compare them with outstanding classmates in my class, and often show my dissatisfaction with him in front of my children. This will only hurt children's self-esteem, make them give up on themselves, lose confidence and interest in learning, and cause a vicious circle. Therefore, parents should pay attention to their words and deeds, and must treat their children with a positive attitude, believing that children can be changed. When children make even a little progress than before, parents should give them appropriate encouragement and praise to make them realize that they are slowly changing. Parents should learn to compare their children's present with the past, not with other students, because every child is different. Parents should also strengthen their children's excellent behavior in time and punish their children's bad behavior appropriately. Never give a predetermined reward when a child fails to finish his homework. When children have changed at home, parents can contact or communicate with teachers, encourage and praise children in schools or classes, and strengthen their good behavior in time.
18 Let children have a sense of crisis and pressure.
For every child and parent, if they want to shape a conscious life, it is inevitable and must be thought clearly. The formation of learning motivation, it is best not to instill, but to form awareness, guide children, and let children analyze themselves. Let children have a correct and clear understanding of the small environment and the big environment where they grow up and live, and have a sense of crisis. With regard to the general environment, everyone's mantra now is "It's a competitive society now". Let children understand that this fierce competitive environment requires enthusiastic response and active participation-let children really yearn for competition.
Need to be reminded that children should have a sense of crisis and pressure. To make their yearning for a better life not stay in daydreaming, we should let them know how bad the bad future is, and let them know that they are on the edge of this kind of good and bad; But this sense of crisis should be moderate, and children must have a certain sense of security and protection. Of course, this kind of protection is not power and money, nor is it a substitute for parents, but the confidence brought by parents and his efforts, running forward together, and communication and encouragement.
After solving the problem of learning motivation, the next step is to help children establish good and fruitful study habits, that is, to cultivate a positive and conscious learning state every day.
It is worth reminding that a healthy way of family entertainment should be established. Have fun with the children. Have a good time. Good entertainment can truly constitute the bright spot of life, become the driving force of work and study, and also be an indicator of a happy life.
Outdoor activities, mountain climbing, swimming, playing table tennis ... have a family game with the whole family. It is very active entertainment to let children have more opportunities to get in touch with nature and enhance their physique; In contrast, taking children to restaurants and shopping malls when they have nothing to do is not a particularly effective way to relax.
For children's study. You may have had a headache, and your children have worked hard, but the state of standing still in grades almost makes you lose confidence, but please remember that "discoverer education" will never let you and your children down. As long as we work together, it will pay off. We are confident to help your children improve their grades quickly and reduce the burden and pressure on you and your children. Let your children prove to you with excellent results that your children are smart and the best.
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