Send a few short messages to my wife to make her happy.

mobile phone funny SMS encyclopedia! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

> Remember the military training under the tree that year? The coach said to the students, "Count off in the first row!" You looked at the coach in surprise, and the coach said loudly again, "Count off!" " So, reluctantly, you turned around and hugged the tree!

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> > The latest news: The main transmission route of SARS is currency in circulation. For the health of you and your family, please clean up all your cash and seal it in plastic bags. I will collect it at home and charge a small fee.

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> > A pair of lovers were caught by a savage in the mountain and said, you will let you go if you eat each other's shit. The lover did it. On the way home, the woman cried. The man asked her why, and the woman said sadly: You don't love me, otherwise you won't pull so much!

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> > On the journey of our friendship, sometimes you can't see me beside you. It's not that I forget you, let alone. It's that I choose to walk behind you. When you accidentally fall, I run up and step on my feet!

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> > Shall we go on a date on Saturday? Please grant my sincere request! Because I really want to walk with you to the seaside and listen to the sound of the sea. I will take you to climb the highest stone near Shanghai and kick you down!

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> > The weather is cold and hot, and it is difficult to calm down in this season. I always miss you far away. I would like to raise a homing pigeon and let it fly to your place every day, even if it is only a simple action: pull a shit on your head!

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> > Yesterday, I dreamed of you. Really, the sky was so quiet, the sun was so bright, the sea was so boundless, and you stood by the blue sea. I stabbed you with a stick. Hey, this little bastard has a hard shell.

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> > Love is empty, love is empty, and I wander in the street; People are empty and money is empty, and single bad karma is working; Things are empty and businesses are empty, and they go crazy when they think about it; The mobile phone is empty and has no money to charge, and life is not easy; In short, all four are empty.

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> > When I turned my head and left, you cried helplessly behind me, and the heartbreaking pain made me suddenly understand how much I love you. I turned around and hugged you: this pig is not for sale.

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> > I saw you that day, in the supermarket! You quietly put your hand on the barcode scanner, and the screen shows: 8 yuan the trotter. Do you think the machine is broken? Look over your face, and the screen shows 5 yuan, the pig's head!

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> > When you pick up the mirror and look at your round face, high nose, charming eyes, sexy mouth and blessed ears, you will sigh loudly-pig! ! ! !

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> > Are you lonely? If so, why do people ask you when you go downstairs to buy a rope and a stick, tie the rope to the stick, and wave the stick at the top of the building when the wind blows? Just say: I'm having a seizure. . .

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> > People are really tired when they are alive! Standing thinking about sleeping, getting on the bus has to wait in line, unrequited love is really painful, eating is tasteless, drinking is easy to get drunk, working is particularly tired, robbery is not yet possible, and you have to pay taxes to earn money, alas! Even sending a text message to the pig has to be charged!

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> > It's just a gust of wind, it's so eternal, it's just a dream, it's so real, you bow your head and say nothing, but I can't calm down. I finally can't help but say to you, let me know the next time you fart!

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> > One night, a naked man called a taxi, and the female driver stared at him intently. The naked man was furious and shouted: You have never seen a naked man before!

the female driver is also furious: I see where the fuck you pay for it!

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> > Dear users, your phone bill is no longer enough in .1 yuan. Please pay the phone bill in the near future: selling children, selling women, selling rice, selling iron and selling some blood, selling land, selling houses and selling wives. Thank you for your cooperation! China Telecom

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> > I wrote your name all over the sky and was taken away by the clouds. I wrote your name all over the mountain and was taken away by the wind. I wrote your name all over the street, kao, and I was taken away by the police

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> > In Chinese class, the teacher called a sleepy classmate to answer questions. The classmate was in a daze and couldn't say anything ... The teacher said, "Can you? You won't let me know! "this classmate:" hey. “

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> > Dear users, because most of your short messages are sent to the opposite sex, which has a very bad influence on society, we have suspended your short message function. Please bring your own bench tomorrow and go to the nearest police station to learn your style knowledge!

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> > Yesterday, I dreamt of God, and he said that he could grant me a wish. I took out my globe and said that it was too difficult to have world peace. He said that it was too difficult to change it. I took out your photo and said that I wanted this person to be beautiful. He pondered and said that I would take a look at the globe again.

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> > There are six kinds of pigs in the world, those who are kept at home are called domestic pigs, those who are born in the mountains are called wild boars, and those who read this message are called stupid pigs. If you are laughing at a stupid pig, you are angry with a big pig, and those who ignore me are dead pigs. Even pigs are not as good as

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> > You go! Find someone worthy of your love … I don't know you and your feelings well enough. I know that some things can't be forced and some distances can't be crossed. Just like yesterday, I really couldn't believe that you left with someone for a bone

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> > I can't think what you think; Wearing clothes has no styling; I can't get along with anyone; Wherever you go, you are not welcome; I can't catch up with Lenin when I think about the problem; The heart stopped stealing when it was okay; Pneumonia is not typical!

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> > Notice for finding monkeys: I lost a hairy monkey. Features: dirty, full of snot, with a mobile phone, I can read short messages. I love monkeys and write back to my master as soon as possible! Master misses you now

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> > 6 When I met 9, I said: Take two steps when you take two steps, and practice handstand. meets 8 and says: if you are fat, you will be fat, so why should you wear a belt? 7 Meet 2 and say: Come on, don't kneel down again and I won't marry you; 2 met 5 and said: I haven't seen breast augmentation for several days!

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> > One day, when Liu Hongtao met a foreign guest, he said, i am hong taoliu, and the foreign guest said, I'm still a square seven!

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> > Abcdefghijklmnpqrstvwxz, do you know what's missing? It's you Without you, no amount of happiness is not the happiness I want, my friend, it is a lifetime!

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> > Not every flower can represent love, but roses do; Not every tree can withstand thirst, but poplar can; Not every pig can read short messages, but you did. Congratulations!

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> > You are the sun in my heart, but it rains; You are the moon in my dream, but it is covered by clouds; You are the most beautiful flower in my heart, but it has bloomed; You are the Chang 'e in the sky, but unfortunately your face landed first ...

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> > What's going on? I called your mobile phone just now, and after the bell rang, the phone prompted a voice saying: The other party is streaking, please dial again later. I can't believe it! Dial again and say: Sorry, the subscriber you dialed has run out of service area, please redial later.

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> > In my eyes, you always look so carefree, eat with relish and sleep soundly. . . I really envy you. Sometimes I think it's good to be a pig.

Author: Simply reply to this speech at 21: 2 on May 6, 24

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> > It's a pleasure to miss you

It's a pleasure to meet you

Loving you is something I will always do

Keeping you in my heart is something I've been doing

But ...

Lying to you is a recent thing

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> > Tomorrow, when you wake up, there is a mosquito lying next to your pillow, and there is a suicide note: I struggled all night but failed to pierce your face. Your thick skin makes me ashamed to live in this world. Please forgive him, Lord, I committed suicide

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> > Are you secretly thinking about me? Are you really thinking about me secretly? If you really want me to tell me, I won't let you miss me. Be reasonable, I miss you, too!

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> > Marriage:

the poor are one meter ugly,

the rural registered permanent residence with primary school culture,

the broken house has three rooms and an acre of thin land,

the wife who has a cold pot and a hot stove has no wife,

the medicine never leaves her mouth all year round,

Today, short messages are widely used to recruit girlfriends, and

the revolutionary road goes hand in hand.

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> > A thunder woke Bush up in the middle of the night and shouted, "Quick, turn on the light!" " The bodyguard lit the candle knowingly. Looking at the heavy rain outside the window, Bush hissed and said, "I'm all over Afghanistan."

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> > I can't eat for one day, I can't go to work for two days, I'm not in the mood for three days, I can't sleep for four days, I can't get out of bed for five days, I'm going to the hospital for six days, and I'm going to queue up to be reborn. Are you willing to

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> > Men are not bad, a little perverted, men are not coquettish, they are a straw bag. Men are not philandering, they are definitely nervous, men are not hooligans, and their development is abnormal

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> > Types of pigs: domestic pigs are kept at home, wild boars are born in the mountains, stupid pigs are reading this message, stupid pigs are laughing, stupid pigs are angry, and dead pigs are not returning messages

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> > People are really tired when they are alive. They want to sleep when they are standing, and they have to wait in line by car, and they are very tired at work ... Alas, it doesn't matter. What I can't stand most is that I have to pay for sending messages to pigs!

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> > I have a poem, which is known to many people in the world. If a fool reads the poem once, knowing it means knowing it, and not knowing it means not knowing it. I knew you were a fool, and a fool must be reading the poem when he heard the cell phone squeak

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> > You are so happy when you eat, so you destroy the world. After falling out of love, you cry for heaven and land, and when you borrow money, you beg for heaven and land. Now you are finally married. Thank goodness.

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> > You go and find someone worthy of your love. I don't know you and your feelings well enough. I know that some things can't be forced, and some distances can't be crossed. Just like yesterday, I really can't believe that you ran away with someone else for a bone.

T.T

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> > Are you full today? Did you sleep well? Will it be cold late at night? I really want to be by your side quietly. I know you never take care of yourself. Whenever I leave, you jump out of the pigsty!

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> > I've been thinking about it for a long time, and I'm afraid it will hurt you, but in order to show my sincerity, I have to say-get up!

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> > You are kind like a cat, loyal like a dog, cute like a bird, knowledgeable like a horse, brilliant like a butterfly, hardworking like a bee, and you are alike in everything. No wonder everyone calls you …………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… >

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> > I've always wanted to ask you a question, but I dare not speak rashly. Especially in the quiet and lonely night, I have to send a message to ask you: Do you still wet the bed these days?

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> > Yesterday, I made a bet with my friend. I said: There is nothing more stupid than a pig in the world. As a result,