About blind date

Through the communication between matchmakers, both men and women agreed on the date of meeting, commonly known as "Ren Xiang", "Xiangzifu" and "Xiangnvfu". Generally, men go to women's homes, and some women go to men's homes. Both men and women on blind dates pay special attention to their personal image and try to leave a good impression on each other. When a man goes to a woman's house for a blind date, he must freshen up. Parents or parents should also teach him how to toast, how to address himself and how to serve others. When he went to the woman's house, he went to the woman's house under the guidance of the matchmaker and parents or parents. Most of his manners are more than dull detention, but not handsome and generous.

On the day of blind date, the woman's family also attaches great importance to it. Clean up thoroughly, make a window bright and clean, clean inside and outside, and the girl should dress up. At the same time, she will invite her brother-in-law and seven aunts to accompany her, and let them give their opinions as a reference for whether they can get engaged. At the same time, prepare a hospitable meal and entertain warmly. Even on blind dates, men and women have no chance to talk directly, but they are careful and peek at each other. Before leaving after dinner, parents or parents send money or gifts to both men and women, which are generally accepted on the spot. Whether the two sides agree to get married, then the matchmaker will send a message and exchange blessings.

After the blind date, the woman's parents or parents, accompanied by the matchmaker, take their daughter (or not) to the man's house to "look after" or "look after the property", and get in touch with the family members of the man in an all-round way to find out how many acres of land, how many rooms, how many holes there are in the kiln, how many animals there are, the layout of the yard and the indoor decoration, and consider whether the daughter has a good life after going through the door. In the past, some families were poor, their homes were surrounded by walls, and their rooms were empty. In order to muddle through and please each other, they had to borrow furniture, furnishings and bedding from relatives and neighbors on the day when the woman "saw the job". "Live" attracts you, and you can get married smoothly.

Local folk blind dates between men and women are not only held in women's or men's homes, but also quite a few so-called "meetings" between men and women at fairs and temple fairs. That is, both men and women are brought to meet by the matchmaker or parents, and the matchmaker is far away from the crowd. The two sides can only look at each other, but they can't see clearly. This method is called "looking back". Especially for men and women, one of them has physical defects or other problems, and some parents collude with the matchmaker to invite other men and women to take the place, referring to deer as horses and flowers as trees, commonly known as "being the number one." Only after marriage can the truth come out. It's too late for the cheated party to regret, and it's inevitable to feel sad secretly, submit to humiliation, hold tears and hold a grudge for life. In the old society of "being loyal to one's own life", since raw rice has been cooked, one has to admit that one's life is hard and one's life is sinful. After a long time, you will be happy with it for a long time.

Many people think that blind date is a backward way of love, and it is inhuman and snobbish to constantly measure each other's family background and living conditions before they have feelings. Therefore, many young people always find fault with each other and are unwilling to make friends when they meet with their parents and relatives.

But psychologists at the University of Pennsylvania in the United States published a paper in the latest issue of Evolution and Human Behavior, pointing out that blind date is actually very important.

The researchers conducted the research through a professional matchmaker company. They found that before arranging a blind date, the matchmaker company usually compares the ideal situation of their "other half" with the reality in detail, and thinks that they are a good match before making a decision to arrange a blind date. However, no matter how well the written materials match, most people decide to stop dating after meeting for a few seconds, and women have less time to make a decision.

Kurban, an assistant professor at the University of Pennsylvania who led the research, believes that blind date is not a "game world". In "speed dating", people are not judged by written materials, but are driven by intuition. From the first sight of each other to the formation of judgment, the whole journey is only about 3 seconds, which is too late to be measured by "snobbish" factors such as money and power. So, don't give up the opportunity to let your intuition judge.

The researchers also gave some advice to those who are going on blind dates, because they found that although people always think that men pay more attention to women's appearance when choosing a partner, the experimental results are just the opposite. When asked to rate the attractiveness of a date, women have higher requirements for appearance than men. This means that if a man wants to win a woman's heart in three seconds, it is very important to have a steady and bright appearance besides preparing a wonderful opening speech.

Facing the blind date mentality

Once a person reaches the age of 30, he is still alone. Even if you don't care, there are still countless good people who are anxious about your life. It can be said that the emperor is in no hurry. What they are most keen on is to introduce you to the thin swallows in the world. Therefore, an older youth will start a very important chapter in his life-dating life, and can taste the ups and downs.

Undeniably, for an unmarried youth, the role of blind date is immeasurable. Stupid older youths, in particular, have no courage in love, have no confidence in themselves, and stay away from the opposite sex. They really need constant encouragement and supervision from the matchmaker, constant advocacy from the matchmaker, and extensive publicity-just like VCD, which was unsalable some time ago, otherwise it will be difficult to sell.

However, even if the matchmaker works miracles, you may not meet the woman of your dreams, so as to get along well with Qin Jin and grow old together. A more professional matchmaker may do a survey in advance to find out that you two are generally suitable and then make a match. Just not all matchmakers are so dedicated.

There are many blind dates, but the good things have not been done yet, and the expectations for blind dates are greatly reduced. Just like buying lottery tickets, if you buy more, you will lose a penny. When you see the lottery, you will tell yourself not to be stupid again. Besides, the matchmaker is not omnipotent, and it is not impossible without a matchmaker. So I am quite resistant to the game of blind date, which brings together unrelated men and women and tells you that you are getting married-even if you accidentally think about it, you will be afraid. However, people are contradictory, even if they don't believe in something very much, they still have the psychology of trying again. Moreover, when a person is old, he will be much more open-minded, just like a fairy. It's better to believe than not to believe-a dead horse is a living horse doctor, and maybe fate will come at some point. So every once in a while, all kinds of funny or sad blind date stories will be staged under the careful director of the matchmaker.

On the other hand, even if you don't meet the person in your life every time you go on a blind date, even if you don't get any return every time you pay, what kind of enjoyment is it to attend all kinds of blind date banquets with a normal heart, face the blind date life coldly and feel the warmth of the world? !

Views on blind date

There are many ways to bring two people together, and blind date is one of them, an opportunity to know others! One of the biggest differences between blind date and self-seeking is that both parties report the same purpose, and self-seeking must first determine the relationship between friends, then good friends, then close friends, then lovers, and finally determine whether to get married. This process is difficult and brain-consuming. Blind date, everyone knows that they are getting to know each other better on the basis of the reported object. It saves a lot of things, but it takes a long time to get into the state or find the feeling. So it's better to try once than not at all, and you don't have to listen to the saying that it's better to find it yourself. Both traditional blind date and self-seeking have their own advantages and disadvantages, which should be treated dialectically. After all, blind date is to find out the side information first and then study the positive information by yourself. Safer, higher safety factor. Looking for it yourself is based on your own experience and way of doing things. It is inevitable that there will be mistakes or mistakes, and it will be very troublesome for parents to disagree. However, one advantage is that you can get a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment of self-realization value. After all, there is a process from strangeness to intimacy that will be unforgettable, and blind date will not have that vague color, which is very realistic. But then again, after a blind date, you can go from strange to intimate romance, and it is not without a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. The most important thing is to find someone who deserves the love of your life. If this can be done, it is advisable to find it by yourself or on a blind date.

It is worth mentioning that since it is a process of getting to know others, blind date often enters the state from face to face, which is often not as long as its own meaning, so it is difficult to succeed, because in just a few hours, it is difficult to understand a person's heart, including his or her outlook on life, conduct and lifestyle. So, if you don't hate yourself, give each other a chance, a chance to go deep into each other's hearts. Moreover, if you feel inappropriate, don't hurt each other's self-esteem. Furthermore, don't attach too much importance to material conditions. Although two people need a certain material foundation together, we are both young people. It is also a way for two people to get to know each other and deepen their feelings together. Personally, I don't think it is appropriate. With the foundation of sharing weal and woe, the future road will be better and life will be sweeter. The woman should pay more attention to the man's character and sense of responsibility. The man should not only pay attention to his figure and appearance, but also tolerate each other. In this way, the chances of successful blind date will be much greater. If misfortune can't start, don't be too picky about each other's shortcomings. After all, you are already a person who has nothing to do with yourself. It's really unnecessary. The so-called "business is not righteous", mutual respect is the magic weapon of happiness on the road of life.

Blind date, ready to go again.

Once upon a time, blind date became a very fashionable topic. There are always enthusiastic people around those school-age young people who act as "matchmakers", and they have made a beautiful marriage. Since entering the information age, people have known more and more means and media, and blind date has become synonymous with "conservatism". But it is undeniable that blind date, an ancient medium, still has its unique charm.

Generally speaking, as an introducer of blind date, people often have a good understanding of both men and women, not to mention their roots, but also their qualities and their temperament. Therefore, before blind date, the matching rate of men and women in hardware-family, education and personality-is often better than other media means, such as QQ and Internet, and the success rate is also better than the latter. Of course, this is only the first step of blind date. If you can accept blind date and expect to find your soul mate through this ancient medium, there are several things you can't ignore-

First, the "blind date" before the blind date.

You have to determine what kind of person you are looking for and what kind of requirements you have for his "hardware", such as work, income, family, education, appearance and so on. Don't be embarrassed, speak out boldly, this is the "blind date" before blind date. If you are an apple, you must choose the one that suits you best from thousands of apples. If you are a mango, you should also pick out the mango that suits you. No one will force an apple to marry a mango. Obviously, the matching rate of "hardware" is too low.

Second, warm up.

If the other party's hardware conditions meet your requirements, you can ask the contact person to give the other party a contact information first. By phone, text message, etc. Communicate in advance to "know yourself and know yourself, and fight in every battle." Please note that this is very important. Many people, blind date, will undoubtedly lose; Blind date again, lost again. The bad thing is that the blind date did not communicate in advance. Suddenly, somewhere, two people are sitting together with their eyes wide open. I don't know where to start. How high can this blind date success index be?

Third, the time and place of blind date.

Modern people are in a hurry, but this is not the reason for "no time". It is best to choose the time of blind date during the day, so that both sides have more time and can fully carry out in-depth exchanges. The location of blind date varies from person to person, but the place that is too noisy and lively is not an ideal blind date location, which will also increase the invisible pressure on the parties.

Fourth, don't attach too much importance to the "first side".

Many friends around me know each other through blind dates, but when it comes to meeting for the first time, they will use "funny" and "no feeling" to describe it. After several meetings, the two sides will have a good impression on each other. Indeed, in this world, the probability of love at first sight is too low, and we can't demand others.

Three stages of blind date

Blind date is a seemingly easy thing, but it is actually meaningful. Anyone who has experienced this activity n times knows that there are three stages in blind date life.

The first stage: wait and see the accumulation period, showing shyness and nervousness. Just like the students' first entrance examination, they feel uneasy and nervous. The chances of dating again for the second time or later are not high, and they are generally "a bright light". Since then, I have forgotten the Jianghu.

The second stage: the bold development period, when blind date becomes a living habit, when you watch too much and don't see it, it's like losing something, so you are no longer nervous and picky. Basically, I will visit you as soon as I have time, and I will never be shy again. I'm embarrassed to ask this and that, but like the film policeman, I know each other's family, hobbies, education, work and even seven aunts, nephews and nieces like the back of my hand. In this period, if you can meet someone who can talk to you, and all the conditions are ok, you must seize it, because this is "meeting the right person at the right time", and you can't imagine a better future. You should always alert yourself with the story of "The blind man broke the stick".

The third stage: waiting for the rabbit. Once we miss the best opportunity, when the blind date turns from habit to pain again, all we can do is rely on the virtue of past lives. Since regret has no effect, then devote yourself to work or honor your parents and wait for the "super pie" that falls from the sky. Amen, send blessings, only blessings.

To sum up, both men and women must marry themselves or win their own hearts in their golden age. Only in this way can we comfort the hearts of countless people, parents, relatives, friends and, most importantly, their own hearts! The so-called "flowers can be folded straight, so don't wait for no flowers to fold" is also true!

Nine embarrassments of blind date

Blind date is an embarrassing topic, and it is easier to dramatize this embarrassment by thinking about life. Let's talk about the nine embarrassments in blind date life:

Five embarrassing situations for women to go to a man's house for blind date are:

The first big embarrassment: four generations of boyfriends live under one roof. As soon as they entered his house, there were four old people on the scene. Although smart boyfriends will introduce them one by one, they can be called boyfriends. Nodding is ridiculous, but it doesn't show enough respect for each other. I'm in an awkward position where I want to scream but I can't scream.

The second biggest embarrassment: the first time I ate at my boyfriend's house, my boyfriend's mother was afraid that you were shy and cooked a lot of dishes for you. You didn't eat one of them, and you were afraid to eat it. But my boyfriend's mother thought it was a good dish and put chopsticks in the bowl for you, so that you couldn't eat it or throw it away. It was embarrassing.

The third biggest embarrassment: I suddenly have something to do and want to leave my boyfriend's house, but all the members of her boyfriend's house are busy entertaining. It is not good to leave by yourself at this time, and it is not good to stay. Embarrassment overflows.

The fourth biggest embarrassment: I just came to my boyfriend's house with curiosity, but my boyfriend's house took it seriously and invited many relatives and friends to dinner. Actually, they're here to help with the blind date. If you break up, you will be ashamed to see people in the future, and people will experience the embarrassment of life everywhere and all the time.

The fifth biggest embarrassment: A group of people broke up and wanted to go home. The boyfriend's family insisted on living in his house by themselves. His house is very crowded, and it's a little uncomfortable to share a bed with a strange boyfriend's wife. Really: "Life is awkward."

The four major embarrassments of a man going to a woman's house for blind date are:

The first big embarrassment: I just arrived at my girlfriend's house and found that her family had gathered a large group of people who came to blind date. There were many women, and then I sat down. A woman, with her mouth wide open, carefully assumed the role of the old lady of the neighborhood Committee, concurrently serving as the household registration officer of the police station and the judge of the criminal court, and made a realistic historical review of all aspects within three generations. In front of so many strangers, some people should avoid it, but they can't avoid it, so they have to give clear answers, which makes people have to be in an embarrassing state.

The second biggest embarrassment: the girlfriend and the whole family are busy with their arrival, but they are doing nothing and wandering around. The big deal is to watch TV in the living room and want to be a helper, but my girlfriend's mother doesn't want to help. Help, my future mother-in-law won't let me, I won't help, and I'm afraid my future mother-in-law will look down on me, which makes people embarrassed.

The third biggest embarrassment: it's time to eat. The future father-in-law likes to drink a little wine. He doesn't usually drink, and it's hard to say. When he drinks, he makes himself a great Guan Gong. The most terrible thing is that the future father-in-law will drink too much when he is happy. In the future, my mother-in-law wanted to attack and was not good at it, so she had to play it by ear and was embarrassed.

The fourth biggest embarrassment: there is something wrong with the electrical appliances in my girlfriend's house. I don't know whether to test my future son-in-law, or whether it's really broken and I don't have time to fix it. Anyway, will we have to pretend to repair it for a while before we find that an existing small part is broken, and we have to go out and buy it with great effort, and finally fix that guy, but in the future, my mother-in-law will have to pay for the parts, which makes people feel embarrassed. ...