I want to read funny short messages

Super funny message, very humorous text.

Super funny message, very humorous text.

The vast sky makes you fly high, beautiful stories are interpreted by you, kind children have to chase them, and humorous messages are sent to the little turtle! ! !

After seeing off the guests, the groom returned to the bedroom, only to find a meatball lying on the bed! The groom was frightened and asked where the bride was. Meatball said shyly, I hate it, you don't even know people when they take off their clothes!

Whose child are you? Why are you so heartless?

A lazy cat went crazy after a mouse and finally got married. After marriage, the cat took care of the mouse in every way, and the mouse soon became fat. The mouse was very moved: Dear, why are you so kind to me? Hey, hey, the cat said with a smile, you'll know when you get fat.

An old lady loved playing mahjong before her death. After her death, her children offered to send mahjong with her, but a woman was very worried: what if she called us because she was short of hands?

When you were walking on the road, a bitch jumped on you, bit off a piece of meat from your foot and swallowed it quickly. When you put out your foot to kick it, the dog said with tears: You fight, anyway, I already have your flesh and blood in my stomach!

I love bathing and my skin is good. As pure as ice, it makes you dizzy.

A little girl called the radio station and ordered a song for her mother. Moderator: Why do you want to order a song for her mother? Little girl: Mom works hard every day, so she can have a good rest on weekends. She needs to find me all kinds of homework. Take me to see all kinds of mentors. The host was very moved and said that she was very sensible and a good boy of her mother, so she asked her what song she wanted. Little girl: "Why do women bother women?" Interesting text message

Reading comprehension of foreigners learning Chinese: Xiao Wang gives red envelopes to his boss. Boss: "What do you mean?" Xiao Wang: "Nothing, meaning." Boss: "You are not interesting enough." Xiao Wang: "Nothing, nothing." Boss: "You are so interesting." Xiao Wang: "In fact, there is no other meaning. Please explain what each "meaning" in the text means.

Women are like eggs, hard outside, pure inside and yellow inside! Men are like mangoes, yellow outside and yellow inside. ..

I was idle in the office today, playing with magnets, and was seen by the leader. The leader reached out and took it. As a result, the magnet was attracted by the guide's gold ring.

I remember that after the college entrance examination that year, I knew that I didn't do well in the exam, so I told my father truthfully that my exam results were not ideal and so on. The father said helplessly, "If you don't, just repeat it." At this time, the grandfather sitting on the side said angrily: "If you don't take the exam, you won't take the exam. What poison should I take? " ! "

Xiaoming asked his father to tell him a story. Dad said do you want to listen to the long one or the short one? Xiaoming: Dragon! Dad: "A long time ago, there was a fly buzzing, buzzing, buzzing, buzzing, buzzing. . . "Xiao Ming:" Dad, you'd better make a long story short! " ! Dad: Once upon a time, there was a fly, hum, bang! "

"Why don't you always say something and keep it in your heart?" "I want to expand my chest!"

Students go to the toilet between classes, and when they are finished, they find that there is no paper, and they can't wait for people, and their mobile phones are in arrears. In desperation, he called 10086 for help. . . It is said that there was silence for a long time, and later ... his classmate received such a short message in class: Hello, China Mobile User, your classmate is in the toilet and asked you to send him toilet paper. For details, please contact 10086 Humorous SMS.

A man named Nietzsche went to an interview, and the interviewer asked, "What's your name?" The man replied, "Nietzsche." The interviewer became angry from embarrassment: "Guess your sister! Next! "

When I went home to use my computer, I saw my mother's QQ hanging, and my father was the "husband" of the note. I thought it was very creative, so I changed it to "handsome brother" In the evening, my father sent a message to my mother, "Beauty, have a chat." My mother came to me happily. "Don't tell your father that there are handsome guys chatting with me." ......

Wife is an operating system, once installed and uninstalled, it is very troublesome; Second, the internet, with unlimited scenery and money constantly spent; Xiaomi is a tablecloth. You can change it every day as long as you are interested. Miss is pirated software, don't forget to kill the virus first when using it. Wife is a periodical. If you choose her, you have to pay something. Ernai is a novel, and it is very tiring to read it from beginning to end; Xiaomi is a prose poem, which is meaningful and far-reaching. Miss is a cartoon, which is readable by everyone and cheap!

What are you doing here? The earth is very dangerous. Go back to Mars!

There is a mountain man who has never seen the world. One day, he went to the park in the city and saw a man doing push-ups. He doesn't know what to do. He walked several times and didn't understand: why is there no one down there, just trying?

I think you are a man, so I will give you face. I want to live a good life. I quickly prepared my ticket and came to see me with a sedan chair.

You can try to call the teacher at two in the morning and say, "Teacher, are you asleep?" He said, "Yes, what is it?" At this time, you shout out with all your strength: "I'm still fucking doing my homework!" " "That is before he react, decisive hang up!

The woman is ugly, can't get married, and wants to be trafficked. Finally, my dream came true, but I couldn't sell it for half a month. The kidnapper sent him back, but she insisted on not getting off. The kidnapper gritted his teeth and stamped his feet: Let's go, don't want the car.

A couple of lovers were caught by a savage in the mountains and said that you would let you go if you ate each other's shit. The lover did it. On the way home, the woman cried. The man asked her why, and the woman said sadly, you don't love me, otherwise you won't pull so much!

This heartless man, to be honest, who was the woman who answered the phone in your room last night? She told me that the number you dialed is busy, please redial later.

A shy boy finally got up the courage to ask his beloved girl: What kind of boy do you like? The girl said: hit it off. The boy asked the same question again and had to say sadly, can't you have a flat head?

I am eager to find you at night. I'm waiting for you naked. I can't live without you in bed, but you are the only one who makes me comfortable. Where are you? Pajamas.

Wukong is sucking on the ground with a magnet. Friar Sand asked, Brother, what are you looking for? Wukong: Hey! I dropped my golden hoop, and it didn't take long to grow!