How to reduce the contradiction caused by the deviation of expected judgment in love?

First, shift the focus. Many times, people care about one thing because they put a lot of energy into it. Imagine, if you put all your attention and energy on your feelings, are you very easily suppressed once it goes wrong?

Like a bamboo basket with raw eggs. If you put it in a basket and accidentally drop it, will it cause serious losses? And if you put raw eggs in different bamboo baskets and one of them falls to the ground, will the injury you get be more acceptable? Naturally, if you want to distract yourself from your feelings, there will be some difficult factors at first, but what you need to shape is the whole process of "thinking set":

Enrich your daily life and wait for each other's information content with your mobile phone. I hope I can give you a happy time and give half to myself. At first, I suggested that using this time to "indulge", such as chasing dramas and playing games, would have a higher pass rate than studying, training and working. In the middle and late stage, when the mental state is weak, we must devote the time that two people can't enjoy resources to learning and training a professional skill or a technical specialty to enhance their overall use value.

Second, lower your expectations. Many girls, like Siqi mentioned earlier, often feel insecure and feel that they don't love themselves enough. Many times, it is because many personal behaviors of the other party do not meet their expectations. Many girls usually have a lot of happy imagination when interacting with each other, which is normal. However, the process of a person's growth is to gradually know himself and face the reality. This reality has both good and bad sides.

Especially for feelings, it must be clear that you love this person and it also involves the advantages and disadvantages of his hands. What you need is this kind of feelings, which also includes the shortcomings in feelings. Therefore, the most immediate and reasonable way to improve this problem is to reduce your expectations-after all, expectations are not a normative definition, but a set of standards you have drawn up, and everyone has different expressions of "love", so your management system is not suitable for the other party's practice.

Third, communicate more, there is no need to make the other party think more. Many times, girls don't express their needs and ideas immediately, but choose to let the other person think. They have ideas and demands, but they insist on not talking. For example, when the girl is tired, she expects the boy to slow down and let her have a rest, but she doesn't tell the boy, and she always looks unhappy in the end. The boy asked her what was wrong, and she replied, nothing. On the other hand, the whole process is a white face. At the moment, the inner os of boys is just a variety of black expression packs.

You know, boys are not easy to telepathize. If you let them think, it will only make both sides very unhappy. What boys are not good at is guessing what girls think. At the same time, guessing puzzles not only sharpens emotional intelligence and IQ, but also easily leads to misunderstanding and indifference.

So if you want to know what a boy will do for you and don't like his personal behavior, you'd better tell him directly and simply how you expect to fall in love, and don't let him think too much. Only by pointing out the current communication can we avoid barriers and get better and better. A healthy relationship must be managed with care. Although it is necessary to have hope for feelings, please don't let your expected resolution go wrong and kill the wrong feelings.