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How did parents spend their first meeting happily?
Parents meet for the first time.
Get ready.
1, communicate with your family in advance.
Before the parents of both sides meet, we need to introduce the basic situation of our family in advance so that the parents of the other side can have a preliminary understanding. Basic information, including parents' age, work experience, personal hobbies, etc. It will help you have something to say when you meet for the first time, and it won't be too embarrassing.
2. Pre-preparation
It's best to let the other parents know that they like you before meeting, so that when they meet, the other parents will be more friendly to your parents' meeting, and whatever they talk about will be smoother. Because parents don't have much time to meet each other after all, they still rely on us to send messages most of the time, and our role is very important.
Step 3 reach a tacit understanding
Young couples should discuss with their parents in advance. If they are found to have different opinions, they should reach an agreement by themselves and then communicate with their parents. After all the arrangements are made, the parents of both sides will meet again, so that the parents of both sides will have a certain tacit understanding before meeting for the first time.
Pay attention when meeting.
1, step by step
It is suggested to start with the preferences and simplicity of both parents, and then get familiar with them before entering the topic. Don't go straight to the point at the beginning. In addition, some specific figures are not convenient to mention, and some implicit words can be quoted appropriately to express them. Answer the key questions clearly, don't be embarrassed, and seek truth from facts.
2. Sincere and modest
Parents of both sides meet in order not to get married, so it is best for both sides to treat each other sincerely when meeting. Young couples can remind their parents not to pose in advance. In the process of discussion, everyone should pay attention to the wording as much as possible. No matter whether the other party's opinions agree with you or not, they should keep a friendly and kind attitude and don't stink at everyone.
3. Avoid conflicts
If the parents are lovers or even conflict when they meet, both husband and wife should mediate in time, ease the atmosphere and try to solve it calmly. After all, parents' meeting shows that marriage has been valued by both parents, and young couples can greet their parents in advance to avoid conflicts.
Step 4 avoid details
The more detailed the discussion, the more likely it is to cause disputes. Many details can't be decided at a meeting, so when parents meet, just talk about the general direction, and the details of the wedding can be discussed later. When we meet for the first time, we can also talk about our hobbies and enhance mutual understanding. After all, marriage is not just about two people, but the integration of two families. If both parents are in tune, it will also be helpful to the future marriage life of the couple.
5. Marriage negotiation
If it is a parent-teacher conference to get married, marriage must be the focus of discussion. So we can mainly talk about the problem of buying a house and a car, the decoration of the house, who is responsible for buying a new house, the dowry and the dowry, the determination of the wedding date, the local customs and habits of men (women), and the relatives attending the banquet. Many general directions of wedding preparation can be discussed.
Of course, it should be noted that most of the content needs young couples to communicate with their parents. Don't talk immediately without communication at all, otherwise it may be terrible.
6, these points should be avoided.
(1) Changing your mind temporarily will make the other party feel insincere.
(2) The attitude is tough and non-negotiable. This is the rhythm of collapse.
(3) sending a horse, threatening and intimidating, will definitely annoy each other.
Attention after the meeting
1, communicate in time
Young couples should talk to their parents after meeting to see their views and ideas. This is really important, because both parents are experienced people and will never let you suffer. If they are not satisfied with something, you can try to explain and adjust it first, then communicate with each other and discuss how to solve it.
Step 2 increase interaction
Although parents can't move around often, young couples can visit each other's parents more often. When you visit, you can bring more gifts and say that they are prepared by your parents, so that the other parents can feel that your family is sincere, which will help to dilute some unsatisfactory details.
Image management
When parents meet, they must not be too casual or too grand. For example, flip-flops are too frivolous, but suits and evening dresses are a bit too much. In short, boys can keep fresh and tidy, and girls can dress dignified and elegant, and don't wear revealing clothes.
Mom can consider curly hair, and dad's hairstyle should be arranged in advance. Their clothes are simple and generous, and they seem to be very communicative parents, which can leave a good impression on each other, which is not only conducive to the communication when they meet for the first time, but also conducive to getting along with each other in the future.
Meeting arrangement
1, meeting place
Parents usually talk about marriage when they meet, and the place should not be too casual or too noisy. The meeting place should choose a restaurant with elegant and quiet environment, and you can consider local old-fashioned restaurants that pay more attention to the environment.
2. Meeting time
Parents should meet at a time when both husband and wife and parents are free, such as a rest day. In addition, in order to take care of parents' physical strength, the total meeting time should be controlled at 1-2 hours.
3. Waiter
When meeting, the attendees suggested that only young couples and their parents should bring their grandparents at most. It is forbidden for seven aunts and eight aunts to go into battle together. It is inevitable that outsiders will have many inconveniences when attending their own affairs. Parents of both sides may ignore some important issues because of face.
4. Address
Younger students can call each other's parents: uncles and aunts. Parents can call each other's parents: XX father, XX mother. If the relationship is already very familiar, you can also call your in-laws.
5. Red envelopes
If it's the first time to meet each other's parents, or if you haven't given a red envelope before, you can prepare a red envelope for this meeting. If you have given it before, you don't have to give it this time.
6, bride price
Most parents don't give the bride price when they meet for the first time, because this time it is mainly to discuss the wedding, but if it is arranged before, even if they are engaged, they can give the bride price directly.
Step 7 test
If it is the same city, it is usually the man who checks out. If the man's parents go to the woman's side, it is usually the woman who pays. Of course, in order to avoid conflicts, it is best for young couples to settle accounts by themselves rather than let their parents come.
Step 8 give gifts
Look at the customs in different places. In some places, children prepare gifts for each other's parents, and in other places, children formally come to see their parents first, and then parents meet. They have already given gifts at home, so there is no need to give gifts this time.
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