Communicative etiquette in interpersonal communication

Communication Etiquette of Interpersonal Communication 1 Overview of Interpersonal Communication of Senior High School Students 1, Concept of Interpersonal Communication

Interpersonal communication is also called interpersonal communication. It refers to the process that an individual transmits certain information to other individuals through certain means of expression such as language, words, body movements and expressions. It is a process in which people contact each other in a certain way, thus influencing each other psychologically and behaviorally. The psychological relationship formed between people on the basis of communication is called interpersonal relationship. Usually, interpersonal communication depends on the following conditions: the sender and the receiver have the same understanding of communication information, have timely information feedback in the process of communication, have appropriate communication channels or networks, have certain communication skills and desires, and always respect each other.

2. Types and functions of high school students' interpersonal communication.

The interpersonal communication of senior high school students mainly includes the communication of friends, friends of the opposite sex, classmates, teachers and parents. The middle school stage is an important period of individual socialization, and the successful completion of socialization is inseparable from interpersonal communication.

The functions of interpersonal communication mainly include: interpersonal communication promotes the deepening of self-knowledge, interpersonal communication promotes the process of socialization, and interpersonal communication is a bridge to realize the value of life.

3. The interpersonal characteristics of senior high school students.

First of all, in making friends, the so-called "intimate friends" have emerged from the general friends to individual friends. Many people have known each other all their lives, and often have a lasting friendship at this time.

Secondly, the criteria for choosing friends have changed from being influenced by utilitarian favors and emotions to consciously emphasizing the consistency of ideological understanding and goal pursuit, emphasizing the same interests, requiring honesty with each other, and taking personality, temper and hobbies as the conditions for mutual proximity. At this point, it has shown quite obvious adult tendency.

Third, in the aspect of paying attention to interpersonal relationships, junior high school students pay more attention to their position in small groups, but often ignore the self-image of the whole class, while senior high school students gradually mature their self-esteem and begin to pay attention to their position and image in the group.

Fourth, in the relationship between boys and girls, junior high school students are more sensitive to the relationship between boys and girls, and the distance between the sexes is still strict; High school students, boys and girls become friendly, understand each other and have a harmonious atmosphere.

Fifth, in junior high school, interpersonal relationships are mostly manifested in small groups, especially girls. Students in small groups often obey the will of the "leaders" in the group and have dependence; Among senior high school students, there are fewer small groups. On the contrary, individual activities are enhanced, and they begin to fully demonstrate their independent ability.

The influence of interpersonal relationship on senior high school students. Interpersonal relationship directly affects individual mental health and the cultivation of students' good psychology and personality. A person is not an isolated individual. People often communicate with each other in cognition, emotion, behavior and personality. If an individual is in an environment full of bad interpersonal relationships, conflicts and indifference for a long time, he may become cautious, depressed, introverted or other, and have bad personalities such as short temper and easy suspicion. If students have harmonious interpersonal relationships in class groups, they will feel comfortable, emotionally stable and have strong self-confidence. Therefore, the change of interpersonal relationship will also bring about corresponding changes in individual psychological state and behavior. "Believing in the Tao by loving one's teacher", "sense of collective honor", "team spirit" and "a scholar dies for his bosom friend" are all motivation gained by interpersonal relationship.

It is precisely because of the characteristics of interpersonal relationship that we, as teachers, should be good at finding the breakthrough of interpersonal communication and helping them coordinate interpersonal relationships in the collective.

Communicative etiquette in interpersonal communication 2 1, the concealment of interpersonal communication on the internet.

The most striking feature of the network is concealment. In the network, a person can easily hide his identity and body, and there is no longer the restriction of identity, appearance, temperament, language expression ability and wealth in real communication. Everyone can choose his favorite role and the way to communicate with others without worrying about the impact on real life.

2. Openness of network interpersonal communication.

Traditional college students' interpersonal communication is often limited and organized. For example, different regions have different characteristics, and different groups have different ways of communication. Everyone unconsciously formed different small circles in their communication, and it is difficult for people who do not belong to the same circle to enter the social circle in another field. This means that you must have a certain identity in order to enter a social circle. However, the network need not be like this. For all college students who have access to the Internet, the network is completely open and there are no restrictions on the network. You can blend in with another group if you want.

3. Equality of network interpersonal communication.

All information and culture on the Internet are open and are resources that everyone can enjoy, so all people on the Internet are equal when they get information and communicate. In the real society, interpersonal communication is usually influenced by many social factors, and it is impossible to achieve real equality. Due to the inequality of real factors such as identity, origin, age, gender and economy, the equality that college students yearn for and pursue in real communication will inevitably become an unreachable dream. The network just provides such a platform for college students to achieve spiritual equality without conflicts of interest, making it possible for college students to communicate on an equal footing.

The influence of network on college students' interpersonal communication is 1, which expands the scope of college students' interpersonal communication.

Because interpersonal communication is usually limited by geographical environment and life scope, the scope is narrow. The emergence of the Internet enables people to establish and keep in touch with netizens all over the world. You can video chat with any online friends through instant messaging software, express your feelings to friends thousands of miles away through email, and discuss problems with netizens through forums. As long as you have a computer and a network, you can maintain this kind of interpersonal communication beyond time and space with very little economic cost. These make college students with tight study time, narrow life circle and weak economic strength expand the scope of interpersonal communication.

In the real society, interpersonal communication will also be influenced by social status, age structure, external image and other factors. Even in the same area, people are always fixed in one social circle and cannot enter another. Network communication can ignore the characteristics of social status, age, beauty and ugliness of appearance, and directly become spiritual communication. College students with less social experience are often unable to communicate freely with groups different from themselves, and network communication just makes up for this deficiency, giving college students the opportunity to understand the inner world of people with different social status and age levels.

2. Let college students have full and free communication.

The concealment of the network enables network communicators to communicate without meeting directly, and the network society can provide a humanized living space that breaks through and transcends various restrictions and constraints in the real society. In the online world, people can boldly pour out their feelings and confide to others the inner secrets that are difficult to say in real life. Through the indirect communication between computer and network, people have eliminated all kinds of worries in real life, put aside all kinds of interests and realized their desire to vent, talk and seek understanding. This gives college students better communication conditions. In the online world, no one knows who the real "I" is, so I can completely release my true self. Some worries, some emotions are more willing to talk to netizens who have never met and have no real life intersection. Although the network is virtual, it is also the expression of true feelings. The concealment of network communication significantly enhances the freedom and flexibility of college students' communication, and their ideological cognition and experience will come from interactive communication and influence in an equal way.

College students are in an important stage of psychological growth, and their subjectivity is fully reflected in the network, which is conducive to the cultivation of college students' subjective consciousness and the display of autonomy, enthusiasm and creativity. The virtuality and concealment of network communication provide unlimited opportunities for amplifying people's natural nature, which is conducive to alleviating the psychological burden brought by realistic pressure and helping people who are not good at interpersonal communication to rebuild their confidence. Network communication can soothe their hearts and eliminate negative psychological states such as nervousness, boredom and depression. At the same time, you can make more friends, see more things that you can't touch on campus, and increase your ability to analyze problems from different angles.

One of the three principles of communication etiquette in interpersonal communication: respect for others

Respect for people is the core of all etiquette rules. If you want others to respect you, you must first learn to respect others. This is an important principle of "dealing with others". Learn to respect people from the following three points.

Listen to others. Be a good listener, listen carefully to others, encourage others to talk about their own affairs, and make others feel that he is very important. Such a person will have many friends. It is impolite to just talk and not listen, or to interrupt others casually.

Think of others. Usually when we are in contact with people who are considerate of others, we always feel that this person is easy to get along with and kind. Such people always have good interpersonal relationships and are more likely to succeed in doing things. When dealing with people at ordinary times, we should also abide by this principle and think more about others.

Help others to do it. 1979 There is a sentence in the Charter adopted by the United Nations: "Cultivate people with warm hearts." People should help each other if they can often say, "Are you in trouble? Let me help you! " And try your best to "help others", your heart will be full of love, and you will feel that your life is full. You will have many friends. When you are in trouble, others will be willing to help you.

Principle 2: Treat people with enthusiasm.

Do you like to get in touch with people who are calm and unhappy all day, or do you like to get in touch with people who are happy and enthusiastic? I think everyone likes people with passion, so you should have passion yourself.

Enthusiasm comes from inner love for life and good attitude, which will overflow in your eyes and your speech. Your love for life, classmates, teachers and parents will be revealed through your words and deeds, which will not only cheer you up, but also infect and inspire others and make people want to be with you.

Principle 3: Sincerity.

The most important criterion for choosing friends is sincerity. Sincere friendship is priceless. Sincere people, true, not hypocritical, do what they say, do not talk empty words. A sincere person, sincerely appreciates and appreciates others, and does not complain about life and others. A sincere person has something to say to his face, not to gossip about others behind his back.

When you get along with your classmates, I hope you can also do "seven don't".

Don't break the contract, even a small agreement. Keep an appointment or not meet.

Don't talk about the shortcomings of other students behind their backs. Remember: "Good things are said behind people, and bad things are said in front of people."

Three jokes should be measured. Don't make fun of others, especially their appearance and clothes.

When interacting with classmates, don't just say your own things or things you are interested in, and don't say the same things over and over again. Don't be angry because others give you advice, but face your critics with gratitude, whether it is well-meaning or not, because others' criticism will make you progress continuously.

Don't mess with your classmates' things, even your best friends, and you can't "strike first." You should say hello before using it.

7. Borrow something from your classmates and return it immediately after use.

Finally, I hope you can choose sincere people as friends and be sincere yourself.

Handling skills you need to know in interpersonal communication 1. When others are angry, they need to escape. When the other person is furious, you must keep calm. Anything you say at this time may add fuel to the fire. It is better to pretend as if nothing has happened and go out and hide, and let him vent his bad mood alone. When his energy runs out, we will help him find a way. Besides, we should pay attention to paying high tribute to him in the conversation.

When others are afraid, they need to ask questions. Sometimes, what a person is afraid of may not be what it seems, but is related to his subconscious mind. Ask several questions: "What do you think you have lost?" "Is this loss real or speculative?" "What are you going to do next?". Only by helping each other find out the root of fear can we solve the problem.

3. When others are embarrassed, they need to be motivated. Some people will be embarrassed when they do something wrong or encounter embarrassing things. As an outsider, we should not try to help him get rid of embarrassment, but let him try to take a deep breath. Wait until his embarrassment is relieved, and then ask him what he has found or learned. What you learn through self-expression can make a person stronger.

When others cry, they need company. At this time, you might as well tell the other person that if you feel uncomfortable, you will cry and you will accompany him. Then sit beside him silently and pass the paper towel. It is best to give the crying person some time to recover and then give comfort. Most people want to be listened to and understood, and listening carefully can help them build up their courage.

Communicative etiquette in interpersonal communication. First, take the initiative to communicate.

First of all, take the initiative to communicate with others, and never think that "I won't tell others"; Secondly, take the initiative to say it, some words are really unclear. Speak frankly about your inner feelings, feelings, pains, thoughts and expectations, so that others can understand your feelings.

Second, we must adhere to the five noes principle.

The so-called five noes principle means not criticizing, blaming, complaining, attacking or preaching.

Criticism, blame, complaining, attacking and preaching are all obstacles to communication with others, which will not help, but will worsen things and relationships.

Third, we should respect each other.

First of all, we should respect ourselves, and at the same time give each other the respect they deserve. This is the basis of communication. If the other person doesn't respect you, you should also remind the other person to respect you appropriately. Without mutual respect, there will be no normal communication.

Fourth, pay attention to discretion.

In the process of communication, never speak ill words and never hurt others with bad words. As the saying goes, bad words come from the mouth, and bad words are also taboos in communication.

Fifth, try to be rational and don't be emotional.

Communicating with emotions is often unfriendly, chaotic and unclear, especially when emotional, it is easy to be impulsive and irrational. Don't make impulsive decisions when you are emotional, it is easy to make things irreversible and regret it.

6. Have the courage to admit mistakes and apologize.

Admitting that I was wrong is the disinfectant of communication. The courage to apologize can thaw, improve and transform the problems in communication. One sentence: "I was wrong" gives the other person and myself a step, and the next question is easy to continue communication.

14 skills to improve interpersonal relationships

1, call out the other person's name.

It's really old-fashioned, but it really works. Subconsciously, we really like others to know our names. Whether it's Carnegie's classic works or psychology, you must try to inadvertently call each other's names in private conversations.

The only charge is to pronounce each other's names correctly.

Step 2 laugh more

Although we are now living in an information age, technology and computers have replaced many exchanges between people. However, human beings still live in social networks with socialization as a feedback tool, and we are still an animal that makes a living and profits by socializing. When someone offers a huge real smile (even if it is hypocritical), it will bring you a good mood.

There is also a very secret psychological game here. When your good attitude is passed on to others, others will like you.

Step 3 listen more

All communication is centered on listening, but listening is actually a very negative thing. You can listen to music when you eat and listen to your mother's nagging when you play with your mobile phone. But did you really listen?

You should take listening as a great affirmation: concentrate and make oral confirmation.

4, more verbal confirmation.

Many psychological books regard "verbal confirmation" as a sign of active listening. What is active listening? In fact, it's very simple, that is, after you finish speaking, the other party can reconfirm it in their own way.

For example:

Mark: I went to the Oktoberfest this week and drank a lot of beer!

You: Then you must have drunk a lot!

Mark: Of course! Very interesting. I like a beer that praises things the most.

You: Is this your favorite beer now?

Mark: Yes, it's delicious!

If you just look at the words, it feels like a particularly strange and deliberate dialogue. But in real life, you can really keep the conversation going for a long time. You only need to skillfully repeat each other's words, so that they can feel that you really care about him. Another ridiculous thing is that people like to "listen" but only like to listen to themselves. And when others repeat it, they can feel self and confidence.

5. Multi-historical dialogue.

We have discussed how important it is to listen, which shows the importance of effective listening. Don't snore while listening, and don't stare blankly at your talking friend.

If you really want to show your attention, the best way is to follow up on the topic. The last time your colleague talked about his son, he asked casually this time. When your friend said that he went shopping for clothes last weekend, you can ask what was in the mall. In life, people seldom encounter any big problems, so those little things are people's real lives. You help the other person remember, and the other person will like you. This is a very simple matter.

6. I really like it a lot

In fact, Carnegie pointed out in his book that everyone is eager to be affirmed, but this affirmation must be full of sincerity. Most people don't like to copy flattery mechanically, and they don't like lying compliments. But one thing is the same. People like their work and efforts to be seen and affirmed.

Another element of praise is generosity. When you are generous with praise, it actually means that you are a generous person. And generosity will bring positive energy. When a person does the right thing, you are sure, which means you won't forget what he did. This feeling is the core meaning of being affirmed.

7. Tackle criticism skillfully

You don't need to be a good person. If you want others to really cherish your praise, then criticism is absolutely necessary, but the means of criticism is more important. People's self-esteem is very fragile, even the slightest words will hurt each other. There are only three things you need to know. All criticism needs to have a purpose. Don't criticize in person. Criticism should be short and powerful.

For example:

I have seen the template you sent me in your last email. Not bad. But there is something wrong with the data inside. Next time you send an email, you should read it yourself. Except for the data, the rest of the work is well done. I think you're on your way.

Or, you can make it simpler. Just say "there is something wrong with the data of the file you sent me recently" and wait for the other party to reply. If he apologizes and promises to improve next time. You just need to tell them not to worry, but let them remember what they said. Yes, advocating introspection is also a good example of bypassing criticism.

There is also a softer way to criticize, which is to start with introspection. You introspection, and then let others introspection. However, gentle criticism is only a means, and you can judge yourself according to the situation.

8. Avoid giving orders and use more questions.

Nobody likes being bossed around. You just need to use more questions to avoid being stiff.

"Potter, I need this report tonight. Give it to me as soon as possible. Porter, can you give me a report this afternoon? I really need it. 」

9. Be a human being, not a robot.

People like to observe a person's character and character. Now many business etiquette books say: Hold your head high and shake hands firmly. In short, before you master these things, you are likely to wander back and forth in rude and false manners.

In fact, things don't have to be so complicated, and you don't have to be impeccable in your manners. Just remember two things: self-confidence and respect for others. Some cooperative experts introduced some ways to bring people closer. For example, when introducing yourself to each other, bow your head slightly when shaking hands. These little moves can make people feel respected, and your cooperation with him will last longer.

10, become a speaker.

Everyone likes listening to stories. Exercise your eloquence and make yourself an orator, not a crosstalk performer.

1 1, physical contact

This is embarrassing, but many experts will naturally do so.

12, ask for help

Asking others to help you is actually a way to make others like you. If a person helps you, at least he won't hate you. Again, if you make another person feel good about himself, he will like you.

13, avoid boredom

Let's face it, most people hate boring people. We all like unique, unusual, even freaks. So, you might as well cultivate some unique ways that belong to you. Whether it's a unique way to say hello or goodbye, or a little more humor.

14, ask questions actively

Taking the initiative to ask questions can make people talk about their own problems. Even if the conversation is completely said by the other person, he thinks you like him because you listen. And he will naturally like you.

Communication Etiquette in Interpersonal Communication 5 Psychoanalyst GerardMacqueron believes that interpersonal anxiety is the main reason for this deviation from the true state of self. "Whenever interacting with others, people with interpersonal anxiety will have some dramatic physical signs, such as poor breathing, blushing and trembling. They are ashamed of this, because the appearance of these characteristics betrayed them. For a while, they began to reflect on themselves. " They are not good at joining other people's conversations. With these ideological burdens, they are even more at a loss. "I'm so useless" "I have to say something" "I'm so stupid" ... "Whenever they are alone afterwards, they are always troubled by regrets and constantly judge themselves." Gilad Macron added. This strange circle is formed because they are too hard on themselves. And all this is often inseparable from childhood experience: always being asked to be the first by people around you, or often belittling themselves, which will make these people accustomed to only thinking about how to leave a good impression on each other when interacting with others.

Psychologist VicentdeGaule thinks that "social complex" is the problem. "Especially those who don't agree with their social roles and are not confident." For example, bitter monks and people from humble origins often do this. Whenever these people enter the society or face some intellectuals with superiority, they will always struggle with some complex: "The gap of objective social identity will lead to their spiritual inferiority, because they often internalize the negative image of themselves reflected by others and hold it in their hearts." Vincent de Gaulle Jacques said:

Lack of * * ability

However, you don't have to have the same social class and hobbies to communicate harmoniously with others. "The most important thing is to understand * * *." Gilad Macron said firmly. Some people feel left out because they don't know how to listen and share other people's feelings. This lack of emotional ability "may be that their needs were not taken seriously in childhood, so they didn't learn how to share others' feelings." "

The analyst explained: "If children are not the focus of parents' attention, their feelings will not be ignored. "How can I feel less stupid? This requires them to be less critical of themselves, take care of others' feelings, show their true side and accept that they are different from their expectations.

■ There are such people around you.

It's no use telling them "Oh, no, you're not stupid at all". Because only they can re-evaluate themselves, and others can't replace them. If you want to help them, you can always mention their advantages. For example, once they have achieved anything, they will find opportunities to congratulate them; Once they have any positive actions, encourage them; When you get your diploma, sign the contract and succeed in the interview, you can celebrate with them. This is the best way to help them improve their self-evaluation.

■ You are such a person yourself.

Are you angry with yourself when you say to yourself "I'm so stupid"? Depression or anxiety? Try to make your emotions clear: Why are you angry? Angry at who? Why do you feel depressed and anxious? Feeling stupid is just an appearance, and what is hidden below is deep pain, and this pain is the goal you have to work hard for.

■ Know the reason for your action.

Why do you feel stupid? Is it because I was shy when I was a child that I often used this way to prove my loneliness, or do I want to get rid of the pressure from my parents? If you follow this line of thinking, you will certainly gain something. But at the same time, you will also have some unpleasant disappointment and loneliness. However, it is this shadow that hinders your progress. Remind yourself not to complain or belittle yourself, which makes you fall into the role of a fool and make you feel at a loss. Try to be humorous and frank, and you will participate in an active conversation atmosphere.

The solution to interpersonal anxiety: listening.

Care about your friends and know their living conditions. Don't always talk about your problems. Friendship will not last long if you are only keen on your own ideas.

Determined to improve themselves.

Cultivate honesty, generosity and humility, and make you a compassionate, respected and attractive friend. Avoid endless complaints. Constant complaining is boring, which will make friendship leave you. Talk to your close friends about how to change the unpleasant parts of your life.

Moderate communication

You don't need to call or email your friends too much. Communication can be short, five minutes by phone or a short email. Know your friend's schedule and don't call your friend too early or too late. If there is an emergency, you should inform your friends immediately and don't mind disturbing their rest. Know what others think of you. Ask a loyal friend what he thinks of you getting along with others. Pay attention to anything that needs improvement and try to change.

Do not compare.

Don't let friendship become a hidden dispute, compare who has the most money, who has the best clothes and who has the coolest car. Don't quarrel with friends. This practice will only turn friendship into bad comparison. . Establish a healthy and realistic self-image. Vanity and inferiority will prevent you from making new friends.

Take a positive attitude towards life.

Looking for something humorous. Laughter is infectious and attractive.