Complete lines of Jia Ling's sketch "The Goddess and the Female Man"

Classic quotations from "The Goddess and the Female Man":

1. I have big eyes, a small mouth, a straight nose, long legs and long S-shaped arms. My name is Qu Ying.

2. I am pretty, and a group of boys are cheering me on. I have a lot of face.

3. I posted messages in my circle of friends saying that I was heartbroken. Some people comforted me, some sympathized with me, and some even got tired of me.

4. I have arms and legs, a nose and a mouth. My name is Jia Ling.

5. I am heartless, and a group of boys are shouting in front of me, trying to fight with me.

6. Post a message in the circle of friends saying that I am broken in love, no one comforts me, no one sympathizes, only a bunch of likes.

7. Get up wherever others fall, and lie down wherever you fall.

The character setting in the show continues the popular CCTV variety show "Happy Street", with Jia Ling still playing the role of an older leftover girl with no money or a partner. She still loves to participate in various programs, and they are all foodie programs, such as "Run, Foodie", "How to Eat Today", and "Thank God the Rice is Here". After being scolded by Li Jing and Sha Yi, the "righteous" Xiao Ni transformed into the director and began to add more surprises and twists to the plot. Xiao Ni's first instruction was to ask Jia Ling to say "happy" ten times. Jia Ling cleverly used jokes such as "Why don't you live an unhappy day happily?" and successfully passed the test. After that, Li Jing and Sha Yi began to be asked to use various languages ????to sensationalize and motivate Jia Ling. Later, Qu Ying came on stage to teach Jia Ling how to become a goddess.

Complete lines of "The Goddess and the Female Man":

Li Jing: Ling'er

Jia Ling: Brother

Sha Yi: What are you doing? Woolen cloth?

Jia Ling: Watching TV.

Li Jing: What program is it?

Jia Ling: Xile Street, look at Jia Ling inside, how beautiful she is

Li Jing: Oh, we are not sorry

(Nigmaiti : Jia Ling said happy ten times)

Jia Ling: Hahahahahahaha, I am so happy, brother! You say people, if you are happy, it is difficult for you to be happy or not. Being happy is a day, and being unhappy is also a day. Why are you unhappy living this unhappy day? Why don't you live this happy day happily? How unhappy are you?

Li Jing: Hey, what makes you so happy that you keep saying it several times?

Jia Ling: Do you need a reason to be happy?

Nigmaiti: There is a reason

Jia Ling: Of course there is a reason. Are you happy? Why? (Look at Sha Yi)

Sha Yi: Who am I asking?

Li Jing: You think about it yourself

Jia Ling: I lost my wallet.

Li Jing: What’s so fun about losing your wallet?

Jia Ling: Hey hahahaha, there is no money in it. Ha ha ha ha.

Sha Yi: Xiao Ling'er is so smart. She knows that if she doesn't put money in her wallet, where does she put her money?

Jia Ling: If you don’t put it anywhere, you have no money

(Sha Yi pointed at Jia Ling with his finger)

Li Jing: Tell me something really happy

Jia Ling: Didn’t I participate in the draft some time ago? I was eliminated after every selection, and I was eliminated after every selection. I didn’t even enter the audition. This time is different. I I packaged myself and changed my direction, and the result was

Nigmat: An accident

Jia Ling: I became a judge

(Everyone stood up, Jia Ling looked at Sha Yi, who pushed Jia Ling towards Li Jing, who then pushed Jia Ling towards Sha Yi)

Sha Yi: Music, stop

Jia Ling: What are you doing? Yeah

Sha Yi: That’s nonsense. Sha Yi: Participating in the draft every day is all about eating. What a foodie?

Li Jing: Where to eat, dad?

Sha Yi: How to eat today,

Li Jing: Eat during the seven days of the Chinese New Year

Sha Yi: Still There is a very long name called What to Eat

Jia Ling: Thank God the rice is here

(Sha Yi pushes Jia Ling with her finger)

Li Jing: We have such What a great show, why don’t you pick something of high quality?

Jia Ling: What’s there?

Li Jing: Singing competition.

Jia Ling: My voice is not good

Sha Yi: Dance competition.

Jia Ling: My legs are not good.

Li Jing: Knowledge competition.

Jia Ling: My brain is not good.

Sha Yi: Host competition.

Jia Ling: I can’t speak well.

Li Jing: Model Contest.

Jia Ling: No way.

Sha Yi and Li Jing said in unison: You are really good

Jia Ling: I found you two

Nigmat: Deeply affectionate

Jia Ling : So annoying, brother, I am almost thirty this year. I don’t have a job and I don’t have a partner. Sometimes when I think about it, I feel very lost

Nigmaiti and you two comfort her

(Sha Yi and Li Jing turned to the sofa, and Li Jing pulled Jia Ling away. , Sha Yi knocked on Jia Ling’s back)

Li Jing: Ling’er, you can’t be so pessimistic about this life. Just look forward, there are always many good things in life

Sha Yi: Pull Jia Ling over, yes, filter out the unsatisfactory things one by one and solve them one by one. First, you don’t have a boyfriend

Jia Ling: How to solve it

Sha Yi: Second, you have no job

Jia Ling: How to solve it

Sha Yi: Third, why do you keep thinking about these useless things, even though you You have nothing, but you have family, friends, distant cousins, and third aunts in the countryside.

Moderator: Reverse.

Sha Yi: They are all waiting for you to feed them.

Jia Ling: Why do you need me to support you?

Li Jing: Of course you have to support me. How old are you? Now you are the senior, the senior, the senior.

Jia Ling: I can’t have a baby.

Li Jing: Why are you so naive in your situation?

Sha Yi: Do you know why you are not always selected in the draft? Let me summarize my problem.

Jia Ling: What’s my problem?

Li Jing: Temperament problem, no temperament.

Jia Ling: Who said I have no temperament.

Sha Yi: Is this temperament? Isn't this an airbag?

Jia Ling: (stands up) Who is the air bag?

Sha Yi: Look what I said still pops up

Jia Ling: Then what do you mean by temperament?

Sha Yi: The question of temperament How to solve it

Nigmat: The last person with temperament

Li Jing: Take this for example

(Push Sha Yi away)

Nigmat: Qu Ying.

Li Jing: You see, this is called temperament. Temperament is from the inside out. Different people have different temperaments

(Qu Ying catwalk)

Li Jing: This is the temperament of a goddess

(Jia Ling on the catwalk)

Sha Yi: This is the airbag of a female man (Jia Ling hits Sha Yi)

(Jia Ling and Qu Ying walked the show together, Qu Ying went back, Jia Ling continued, Jia Ling went back, Qu Ying came back again, Jia Ling also came back, Qu Ying returned, Jia Ling continued and returned for 2 seconds)

Jia Ling : No, no, no, she is a model. Can I win in a stage competition with others?

Sha Yi: Then what do you want to compare?

Jia Ling: Comparing with words

Nigmaiti: Comparing in a new situation

Li Jingshayi: The Goddess and the Man

(Music starts)

The Goddess and the Man, the Goddess and the Man

Qu Ying: In my eyes Big mouth, small nose, long legs and S-shaped arms. My name is Qu Ying.

Jia Ling: I have arms and legs, a nose and a mouth. My name is Jia Ling.

Goddess and tomboy, goddess and tomboy

Qu Ying: I am beautiful, and a group of boys cheer me on, and I am particularly proud of myself.

Jia Ling: I am heartless, a group of boys are shouting in front of me, trying to fight with me.

——-I have never lost.

Goddess and tomboy, goddess and tomboy

Qu Ying: I posted a message in the circle of friends saying that I was heartbroken. Some people comforted me, some sympathized with me, and some even got tired of me.

Jia Ling: I posted a message in the circle of friends saying that I was heartbroken, no one comforted me, no one sympathized with me, just a bunch of likes. ——I will marry whoever likes it.

Goddess and tomboy, goddess and tomboy

Qu Ying: My boyfriend and I went to dinner, and he fed me and I was so shy

Jia Ling: Me and My boyfriend went to eat, but I haven't fed him yet. I've finished eating - can you still eat your share?

The goddess and the tomboy, the goddess and the tomboy

Nigmaiti: Announce the result

Sha Yi: The goddess defeated the tomboy, (first referring to Qu Ying and then the Refers to Jia Ling)

Nigmat: Reversal

Sha Yi: (Hurrying to pull Jia Ling up) The goddess wins

Jia Ling: I am the goddess

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Nigmaiti: There is a reason

Sha Yi: Well (mentioning Jia Ling’s clothes) There is a reason. Look at the few steps I took just now, and I got out of the shackles of traditional concepts. , where others fall, they get up, you just sleep a little longer, this kind of spirit of enjoying happiness breaks people's concept of goddess

Jia Ling: I feel that there is a little difference between me and other people. Big

Sha Yi: Can you listen to me?

Li Jing: What size clothes do you wear?

Qu Ying: 175

Jia Ling: 175

Li Jing: Same thing, let’s talk about the legs again. Although he beats you in length, you surpassed him in width. She is one inch long and you are one inch. What a blessing.

Qu Ying: How many inches is this?

Li Jing: What a blessing this is

Jia Ling: I don’t believe this at all

Everyone said in unison: Who believes it

Li Jing: I’m all sorry

Nigmaiti: You all believe it

Everyone (turning around in a hurry): Well, we all believe it

Jia Ling: Ah, haha, I am a goddess, I want to be famous, I need a team to help me,

Everyone: Let us help you

Li Jing: What do you lack

Jia Ling: I need an agent

Li Jing: This agent is not easy to find

Nigmaiti: Come on

Li Jing: Come on, I studied accounting and I happen to be an agent

Jia Ling: But you still have your own job

Li Jing: (Takes out her phone) Wait a minute Yes, hello to the leader, I am Li Jing. I asked you to resign during the Chinese New Year. He agreed

Jia Ling: He has died.

Li Jing: That is also the acquiescence.

(Music starts)

Jia Ling: Brother

Li Jing: Linger

(Embracing each other affectionately)

Jia Ling: Keep it in mind (put hand on chest)

Li Jing: OK (put hand on chest)

Li Jing: What is missing?

Jia Ling: Still have Lack of a stylist

Qu Ying: Oh Ling'er, your shape is too difficult

Nigmat: Come on

Qu Ying: (Suddenly stood up (Get up) But I can create it. I am a fashion magazine editor. I will create your shape for you.

Jia Ling: (holding Qu Ying’s hand) Sister, why don’t you find time to fall in love?

Qu Ying: (patting Jia Ling’s hand) Wait (pick up Mobile phone on the table) Hey, Yanzu, it’s Chinese New Year, let’s break up. (Pause for 2 seconds) The points are over

(Music plays, Qu Ying opens her arms)

Jia Ling: Sister, don’t give it to me (walks towards Qu Ying) You are a prodigal, okay, remember I remember it in my heart (pulling Qu Ying towards the sofa)

Li Jing: What else do you lack?

Jia Ling: Lack of money

(Music plays, everyone watches Xiang Sha Yi, Sha Yi looked at Nigmat, then turned to look at everyone and nodded, stood up) Waiting (taking out his mobile phone while walking) Hu Ke, it’s Chinese New Year, let’s sell a house

(Festival music plays)

Sha Yi: How come my music is not sad anymore

(Everyone walks towards Sha Yi)

Jia Ling:

Selling a house is a good thing, great, I am famous, I have a team, I am a goddess