Super humorous and funny classic sentences

1, I never write words, but I write interchangeable words!

2, the effect of contraception: unsuccessful, it will become a "person."

If you love me, put on my wedding dress and take it off yourself.

4, the face is a thing outside the body, you can do it or not, money is a must, you must have it.

Some people are alive, but she is dead. Some people are still alive, and he should have died!

6. Don't think that I am out of reach because I am handsome. Actually, I am a sea of rivers.

7, eat, I want, thin, I want, you can't have your cake and eat it, I went.

8. Before you touch the flowers and twist the grass, it has already been pulled up by others.

9. The lady is an unexplored Bikachu. A gentleman is a wolf in wool.

10, there are so many brain-dead people in the world, but you have become one of the best.

1 1. Who is the future girlfriend I am in love with now?

12, thank you for stealing my partner and letting me know that he is putting on airs.

13, in front of beautiful women: danger can be saved, and no danger can create danger.

14, no one is born afraid of death, and no one is born afraid of death, so don't pretend!

15, give me a woman and I can create a nation; Give me a bottle of wine and I will lead them to conquer the world!

16, borrowed a friend's car, and the friend said to refuel the car when returning it. When I returned the car, I rushed to the car and applauded.

17, even if my heart is the liver and lungs of the donkey, it is enough to feed the dog's stomach.

18, erection is not everything, but erection is absolutely impossible!

19, if you don't sleep in class, you get drunk on the wine table.

20, WeChat is awesome, it is difficult to make a mobile phone into a walkie-talkie.

2 1. Yesterday I went to the city to take part in the pigeon-letting competition, and I went alone.

22. What should I do if I meet a snake in the wild? Don't panic, hold up an umbrella with a warm smile and pretend to be Xu Xian.

23. There must be a road in front of the driveway, and I can't stop it.

24. Mom said: Even if you are jealous, pretend to play soy sauce, and don't let others look down on you.

25. I am a special person. I am an ordinary person, so I am a particularly ordinary person.

26. Life is like a news broadcast, and you can't escape by changing the channel.

27. I once liked her broad mind, but it was just an airport!

28. Because I love you wholeheartedly, I can only give you up mercilessly.

No one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.

3 1, urinating is prohibited here, and tools will be confiscated.

32, the sky is falling, you hold, I hold!

33. Listen to your words and leave me ten books!

34. Brother, can you lower the resolution of your face a little?

35. If the exam rewards QB, then the country will become rich and strong immediately.

Super humorous classic sentence 2

1. Every time someone says I'm ugly, I feel sad. I went blind at a young age.

I am black because I don't want to waste my life.

There is really no coat that can match the school uniform. You can hide your mobile phone in your sleeve, put your book in your pocket, roll it up as a pillow, spread it out as a blanket, and dare to rub it anywhere.

Many people say that I can eat by my face, but I don't, so I can only eat by my mouth.

5. I have been single for a long time, and suddenly I found that I saw a sow recently and felt very beautiful.

6. "How to euphemistically describe a person with a big face?" "Looking at your face from a distance seems close at hand."

7. You never know which of your best friends will be the next WeChat business.

8. It's windy outside and I'm scared. If everyone else is blown away, I can't. That's a real pity.

9. When you are young, try not to fall in love early. Knowing that you are ugly, ugly and short too early will affect the exam.

10. Women should be kind to themselves, or once you are exhausted, someone will sleep with your man.

1 1. Friends are like quilts. What really warms you is your own body temperature.

12. Damn mosquito, I'm not your father. Why do you always eat mine and drink mine …

13. Life is sometimes like a computer. If it collapses, it collapses. It's not negotiable.

14. The most wonderful thing in life is not the moment when you realize your dreams, but the process of sticking to your dreams!

15. Does the wholesaler have to go to the toilet together? Don't be so obvious

16. I want to sleep in class, sleep and eat, and eat and read. Alas, I'm worried about you!

17. Failure is the mother of success! Why didn't I have children once?

18. I still remember that my former close friends became more and more cold.

19. People rely on looks, routines and burning money to fall in love, while I rely on blind date.

20. Being a handsome boy is tiring, I really know that.

Funny and humorous classic sentences

1: It's easy to hide when it's clear, but hard to prevent when it's dark.

2. You come and I send text messages to each other, which is called letter climax. Sending boring text messages to others is called letter harassment. Just receiving and not sending letters is called indifference. Just calling and not writing text messages is called letter incompetence.

3. When the birds are big, there are all kinds of Woods.

4. Rogues are not terrible, but they are afraid of being educated.

5: The longer you are in contact with people, the more you like dogs. Dogs are always dogs, and people are sometimes not people!

6. A good marriage gives you good experiences, a bad marriage gives you bad experiences, and a bad marriage gives you a pair of children and bills.

7: Marriage is like a maze, and the people who built it have lost their way first.

8. Driving is not difficult. I'm afraid there are quotations from the newcomer Mao Zedong.

9: It's all water. Why do you put alcohol? They are all perverts, so why herd sheep!

10: If the Spring Garden can't be closed, it will lead an apricot out of the wall.

1 1: Not afraid of opponents like gods, but afraid of teammates like pigs.

12: If you don't fall asleep in class, you get drunk on the wine table.

13: Doing all ordinary things well is extraordinary, and doing all simple things right is not simple.

14: Comrades haven't worked hard yet, and the revolution will still succeed.

15: If you can't put on a wedding dress for the woman you love, please stop unbuttoning your hand.

16: Don't say that others are mentally ill. The premise of mental illness is to have a brain to speak mood phrases.

17: after meeting me, you will suddenly find that handsome can be so single-minded!

18: as you say, hang the southeast branch.

19: The only way to get happiness is to cherish what you have and forget what you don't have.

20: According to the pig's aesthetics, I am basically a handsome guy.

2 1: Don't tell me you love me. I feel sick after hearing this sentence.

22: Life is like a journey, and you may capsize somewhere.

23: If people don't commit crimes against me, I won't commit crimes; If people offend me, comity three points; If people force me again, I'll give you an injection; People still attack me and kill the grass.

24: The direction against the wind is more suitable for soaring. Not afraid of being blocked by ten thousand people, I am afraid of surrendering myself.

A person's life is like taking a shit, sometimes you try hard and only come out with a fart.

26: Why should I wait so hard? Why can't you love me even a little?

I would rather be proud and moldy than humble in love.

You can see the words I typed on the screen, but you can't see the tears I dropped on the keyboard. Han Han

Please respect yourself. My daughter only sells herself, not an entertainer.

30: Life has no ifs, only consequences and results.

3 1: everyone else is pretending to be serious, so I have to pretend to be serious.

32: Don't wait for everyone to say you are ugly before you realize that you are really ugly!

Brushing your teeth is a bittersweet thing, because you have a cup in one hand and a washing utensil in the other.

34: playing with feelings? I will make you cry rhythmically. Interesting sentences

35: Hearing a name reminds me of one thing, which makes the city quiet and makes people tremble.

Tongue is longer than teeth, and software is longer than hardware.

Super humorous and funny classic quotations

The controversy over Plato focuses on whether humor is based on pain or pleasure, or both; Whether it is pure sensibility or rationality, or a combination of the two; Physically or psychologically, or both.

190 1 British philosopher sadly talked about humor: there is hardly a word in the language, which is more difficult to define than this familiar word.

There is an article in Psychology Today, 1979, entitled "Every joke has its merits", which analyzes the results of a survey on humor aimed at readers. It shows that humor is a subtle and elusive phenomenon, and we can't clearly list the "types of humor".

Many scholars say that humor can't be defined, so can the Irish writer Bernard Shaw. People who are interested in studying humor may learn something by reading some interesting and humorous books.

For a long time, scholars have been divided on the discussion of laughter and humor, probably because it is not just a joke, but also involves people's psychology, personality, thoughts and attitudes towards life. Therefore, we must study it from the aspects of philosophy and psychology in order to explain it clearly.

Since the 1920s, Lin Yutang, together with Lu Xun, the flag bearer of zg New Literature Movement, has used humor to carry out anti-imperialist and anti-feudal political, ideological and cultural struggles, and explored the theory of humor in them, creating a diaosi-style prose with high tone, humorous language and sharp allegory. Lin Yutang himself is also called a "master of humor".

Linguist Chen Wangdao intends to translate it into "oily", but he thinks it is not accurate enough and frivolous. Later, the linguist Tang translated it as "harmony and harmony", and thought that harmony and harmony constituted the whole "humor". Finally, Lin Yutang's translation method was recognized by the world and has been used ever since.

Lin Yutang explained: "Anyone who is good at humor will be more reclusive;" And those who are good at appreciating humor, especially the inner silence, have a kind of inhuman taste. Unlike rude jokes, the quieter the humor, the more silent it is. "

Lin Yutang translated "humor" into "humor", and many cultural celebrities disagreed at that time. Lu Xun once thought it was easy to be misunderstood as "silence" or "seclusion", but he felt that this translation was inappropriate. Translator Li Qingya advocates translating it into "punch lines", but "punch lines all over the world" is an idiom with the meaning of "all talk and no action".

The interpretation of humor in Ci Hai is to expose the fallacies and irrationality in life through innuendo, allegory, pun and other rhetorical devices in a well-meaning smile.

Humor is not a word that has existed since the birth of Chinese characters. Most people think that this word was first introduced to zg by Mr. Lin Yutang, a master of Chinese studies, in 1924. However, Zhang Jiping, a member of zg Regional Culture Research Association, thinks it is not accurate: the first English word "humor" should have been translated into Chinese by Wang Guowei, a master of Chinese studies, before Lin Yutang first used the translation method of "humor".

Humor first appeared in Qu Yuan's Nine Chapters? Huai Sha: "It is both warm and awkward, and Kong Jing is humorous." "Humor" here means "Humor is silent". However, the word "humor", as a transliteration loan word, has nothing to do with the word "humor" in ancient China. Only with the refinement of the new meaning of the word "humor", as the original meaning of ancient Chinese vocabulary, "humor" was gradually replaced by the new meaning.

When it comes to the debate about humor, it can be traced back to Plato and his dialogues in the 2nd and 3rd centuries BC: We should avoid humor, because it is only based on the happiness we get by laughing at the pain of others. For decades, many experts and scholars have different views on Plato.

From the mechanism of laughter, there are physiological laughter, social laughter, psychological laughter and so on. Only "knowing smile" and "psychological smile" are related to the essence of humor. The so-called "knowing smile" is to make people understand something in laughter and get some enlightenment.

Tell me about super classic humor.

1. Animals only believe what they see, but people can see what they believe-happiness and trouble come from this.

Second, why can diaosi see the masculine personality of the beloved goddess? That's because the goddess doesn't hang you at all and doesn't give you porridge.

3. God saw that you were thirsty and created water; God saw that you were hungry and created rice; God saw that you had no lovely friends and created me; However, he also saw that there is no idiot in this world and created you by the way.

Fourth, "March 8 Girls' Day" is a good idea. One day later, "March 8 Women's Day" will be ushered in.

I drown my sorrows in wine, but I learned to swim in this damn pain.

Six, meet again after many years, I become thinner, you become uncomfortable.

Seven, don't and the earth people general knowledge ~ ~ ~

Eight, happiness is scratching when it itches, but unfortunately it can't be scratched when it itches. More unfortunately, for a long time, neither the soul nor the body felt itchy.

Nine, you are happy because I am happy, I am happy because you are happy, I am sad because you are thin, I am thin because you are sick, I smile because you are strong, I am rich because I sold you … pig!

Ten, youth is like mahjong, either shooting or touching yourself. How many otaku and rotten women have been counted, and how many institutions have been counted, just to enjoy the moment of being knocked down.

I have been by your side, worrying about you again and again. Are you full today? Did you sleep well? Will it be cold late at night? I always knew you couldn't take care of yourself. Every time I walk away, you jump out of the pigsty.

12. Optimists invented yachts, pessimists invented lifebuoys. Optimists build tall buildings, pessimists build fire hydrants; Optimists become hard-working racers, pessimists become doctors in white coats. Finally, the optimist launched a spaceship, and the pessimist opened an insurance company.

Thirteen, diaosi will eventually counterattack, and the fungus will not return to powder.

Fourteen, old advice: Daughter, you have to eat a little properly to lose weight.

Fifteen, beautiful women are everywhere-light is small, heavy is big.

Sixteen, if I lose this life, then I don't want the afterlife.

Seventeen, teenagers don't run amok, bold, old question material come from.

Eighteen, the sky has not fallen on me, so it hurts my heart and hurts my bones and muscles.

Nineteen, I really don't know if the game is for people or for people.

Twenty, to mix rivers and lakes, it is best to be single! !

A successful man earns more money than his wife spends. A successful woman is looking for such a man.

They will never realize how important stupidity, laziness and worthlessness are to the happiness of our lives. ...

Twenty-three, don't be the next, just be the first.

Women are sometimes like walnuts. As long as you can break her hard shell, you will find how soft and fragile she is inside.