Find someone who loves you, or someone you love?

Find someone who loves you, or someone you love?

With regard to love, today's popular culture encourages us to adopt such an attitude: we should be full of expectations for love, but we should also be cautious, and you should master various psychological defense measures.

In this way, the sacredness of love was dissolved.

What are the problems with many popular dating skills on the Internet?

-Excerpted from readers, 2023,438+0.

Many dating skills that are popular on the Internet now,

For example, one of the skills is to teach you how to stay active in love, which is actually to teach you how to play hard to get. Send a text message to the right person. If you don't get a reply within a day, you must contact the other person after three to five days.

You can't take the initiative, let the other party take the initiative, so that you can advance and retreat freely and calmly.

If you reach this level, you will succeed.

Another point that people often emphasize is that you should find someone who loves you, not someone you love.

Looking for the person I love, I am very passive. I may have to pursue him. I'm tired. I don't want to be so tired.

So I'd better find someone who loves me. At least I am comfortable and safe.

Also, whether to take the initiative to confess, or constantly hint at each other and let them confess.

Because confession is a risky move, it means that you may have opened your own defense to some extent. Because there is no defense, it is easy to enter a fragile situation and thus be in a dangerous situation in feelings.

So in love, many people put the sense of security and certainty in the first place.

But think about it, did we come to this world for absolute security?

I think the crux of these problems is that we want to tame love.