Funny slip of the tongue quotes

Funny slip of the tongue quotes

1. My parents were arguing, and my dad said angrily: Get out of here!

2. Call a friend whom you haven’t contacted for a long time and learn that he is in the process of being suspended with pay.

3. When I went to Li Ning to buy shoes with my sister, my sister said: Miss, how much do these shoes cost per pound?

4. The breasts of heroes, the breasts of friendship, and other breasts who helped me, thank you!

5. While cooking at noon, my mother gave me a pot of carrots: Go and cut the carrots into diced meat!

6. In the unit’s congratulatory speech, a leader said: I wish you all good health. Hold on, I’m out of words.

7. I was in the toilet once and ran out of paper. I said to my wife: Bring the butt of the wiping paper!

8. I remember when I played games all night long. Go out early in the morning. It's natural to say why there are no strange people on the street.

9. In computer class, a classmate had a problem with his machine, so he shouted: Boss, change the machine!

10. The teacher told us: Be more honest when riding in the car during spring outings, and don’t throw your heads and arms out all the time.

11. When my colleague wanted to ask about the exchange rate between RMB and Japanese yen, he immediately asked how the exchange rate between the Orangutan and the Japanese yen was.

12. There was a teacher who stayed up all night playing mahjong. When he saw that the blackboard was not wiped, he was furious: Who is playing banker today? Don’t even wipe the blackboard!

13. The fourth person in the dormitory got out of bed and looked for slippers for a long time. There were no slippers. I asked everyone: Why did my slippers disappear?

14. When I was in college, I heard a girl ordering: Master, stir-fry a plate of hot and sour potato shreds, without the potatoes!

15. One time I was driving, and the female colleague sitting next to me suddenly asked: Why are you driving without a condom?

16. Once when I went to eat, I said to the boss when I was paying: Husband! Checkout! The boss's wife was nearby at that time

17. Two people were arguing, and suddenly someone next to them said: You are really full and have nothing to do!

18. In the computer class, a classmate had a problem with his computer, so he shouted: Boss, change the computer! The whole class was stunned.

19. Once I went to my wife’s place after coming out from my mother’s place. When I saw my wife, I habitually called out: Mom!

20. One time, my uncle saw my sister-in-law applying Dabao and suddenly shouted: Your skin is so good, why do you still use Hushubao?

21. A person in our dormitory had to pee after drinking too much and then made a cold remark: If you drink too much pee, you will have too much wine.

22. The physics teacher talks about waves: This is a thick spring. I push it from both ends to see if it becomes dense (constipated)?

23. Our general manager’s surname is Zhou. One time he called me while I was driving. When I was nervous, I opened my mouth and said: Premier Zhou.

24. I was drinking with the leaders and others, and raised a few questions. He raised his glass and said loudly: Let us die together! My mind was too hot at the time

25. A girl was heartbroken, and I advised her: Two-legged toads are hard to find, but there are plenty of three-legged men!

26. I just entered college and was in military training. The company commander didn’t know his accent and shouted the command to drill to the left! Drill right!

27. I was left to do homework by the teacher. If I didn’t know how to do it, I would copy someone else’s work. Then I went to the office to hand in my homework. When I saw the teacher, I said: I’ve finished copying!

28. Once I asked a short-sighted person what the degree of his eyes was. He wanted to say 400 degrees, but as soon as he said it, it was 400 watts, which made his stomach hurt!

29. At a literary evening, the host came to the stage to announce: Please enjoy: Xinjiang singing and dancing, lift your skull! Creepy!

30. When one of our colleagues went to take the driving license test, he said a classic saying to the examiner: Report your instrument, the examiner is normal!

31. When I was in high school, the classroom discipline was chaotic. The teacher grabbed XXX in anger and said: XXX, stand on the wall! The whole class is freezing!

32. A colleague I didn’t know well was chatting with me, and the conversation was extremely boring. He only talked about what was going on between him and his girlfriend. I am speechless.

33. My surname is Zhu, and I manage the unit’s computer room.

Someone once called me on my mobile phone: Chief Chicken, are you in the pig room? At that time, I scolded the guy.

34. I remember one time when I went to buy a fruit called Elizabeth, I opened my mouth and said: Boss, how much does Shakespeare cost? The boss was stunned on the spot.

35. When my colleague was arguing with someone, he got anxious and said: Do you think I grew up eating? I've always wondered what he ate growing up.

36. I have a colleague. One day I was driving on the road and my tire was flat. I asked where I could get inflated tires. My colleague said: There are tire abortists everywhere on the street!

37. Just over 10 minutes into class, my deskmate raised his hand and said: Teacher, I want to use the toilet. The English teacher said very unhappily: How old are you to still go to the toilet?

38. When a colleague was arguing with someone, he opened his mouth in a hurry and said: Do you think I grew up eating? I've always wondered what he ate growing up.

39. There was a teacher named Jiang in high school who looked exactly like Luo Jiaying (who played Tang Monk in Journey to the West). I went to ask him a question and blurted out: Teacher Tang, this is the question

40. At lunch, I forgot to charge my meal card, so I went to the recharge aunt to charge it: Aunt Zhuan who charged me 100 yuan looked at me inexplicably for a long time.

41. I have a classmate who has been reviewing for the computer level 3 test. One day while playing football, another classmate dribbled the ball to the bottom line. I heard him shout: Enter! Enter!

42. While queuing up in the cafeteria, I heard a boy next to me say: Master, give me a bowl of cauliflower soup! (Seaweed and egg drop soup) Haha, I laughed so much that I sprayed soup.

43. When we were in college, we asked a buddy how Manchester United was doing, and he said excitedly: Manchester United lost, and Beckham received two yellow plates and ended the game!

44. I met a girl I had admired for a long time coming out of the bathhouse. I wanted to get close to her, so I held it in for a long time and said: "You are taking a bath, are there many men in there?"

45. Our teacher is very good. One day he said this: Take out the homework, let’s check the answers, mark the correct ones, and then write the correct answers on them

46 , I wanted to drink soda that day, so I hurried a few steps towards the cold drink stand and wanted to get a bottle of soda. Unexpectedly, I saw the beer in front of me and said in a hurry: Boss, a bottle of soda!

47. I was reading posts while eating, and reading classics to my wife, which made her laugh so hard, so she said to me: Just read it after eating, otherwise you will suffer from indigestion!

48. One day I went to a classmate’s house for dinner and drank some wine. Her father suddenly came in. He originally wanted to call her uncle, but he made the mistake of saying: Dad, come and sit down!

49. A friend went to a dumpling restaurant and asked how much a bowl of dumplings (sleep) cost (night)? Just listen to the waitress! He yelled and said: Shameless!

50. I played games too late last night and was late for work this morning. The manager asked why I was late. My answer was: There were a lot of cars today and the road was too jammed! The manager collapsed on the spot.

51. After the union chairman gave an impassioned speech, the last sentence reached a climax: Comrades, let us do better work this year than next year! Everyone fell down.

52. In my junior year, my classmate went to work in a fish mall. The guest took the fish he had chosen. My classmate pointed to the fish killing platform and said to him gently: Go over there, someone will kill you.

53. When I was in college, a teacher gave a lecture and talked about a new type of material. He said: The sexual function of this material is incomparable to old materials. No, performance and function

< p> 54. One day, he did it again as usual. He kicked someone and shouted: "Kick the dog!" Everyone laughed wildly, and he felt embarrassed, so he kicked him again and shouted: "Dog kicks!"

55. My classmate explained to me how to make a certain inquiry phone number. I wanted to ask if the person answering the phone was a real person or a voice, but I was told: Is the person answering the phone alive or dead?

56. During military training in college, the instructor yelled: Use your peripheral vision (peripheral vision) to align! One classmate whispered to me: Only his bladder grows on his face.

57. Once, the leaders of the Jiaoyu Bureau inspected recess exercises. After the end, the physical education teacher was supposed to announce the disbandment, but in a moment of urgency, he forgot the words, held it in for a long time, and shouted: Retreat! .

58. When a student from the Department of Physical Education was taking an internship class, there were many teachers listening to the class. He was so nervous that when he finally wanted to disband the team, his mind went blank for a moment and he muttered: Everyone, pay attention, stand at attention! flash!

59. The exam teacher handed out papers, and the girl behind took an extra one and shouted: Teacher, I have it, I have it! As a result, the boy sitting next to him said: It's mine, it's mine!

60. Someone came to my aunt’s house as a guest before, and she just walked in. It happened that my aunt had to go to the toilet. She quickly greeted the guests and said, "Sit down, sit down, I'll go to the toilet and pour you some tea!"

61. Once I went to McDonald’s to buy a sweet bucket. It was finally my turn. I couldn’t wait to say: Give me two rollers! Unexpectedly, the waiter said loudly to me; two rollers, four yuan!

62. Wearing school uniforms is required in high schools. We boys sometimes only wear school uniform tops. During a gathering, our classmates were not wearing neatly dressed school uniforms. The class teacher was furious: "Everyone who is not wearing pants, stand up!"

63. A colleague asked me yesterday. How to write the festival section? I answered: Add a festive stanza under the prefix "草" and remove the prefix "草"! Everyone burst into laughter! I didn't react for a while!

64. The guys in the dormitory were watching "Prison Break", and there was a scene where a man took out a razor blade from his mouth to kill people. The boss suddenly said: I K, I can still speak even if I hide my mouth in the razor blade. Accepted.

65. When my unit is off work, I wait for the elevator to go downstairs. After the elevator door opened, I saw that it was full of people, so I didn't get in. Then I subconsciously told another colleague who was playing the game next to me that the team was full.

66. I was chatting with a friend. Today was Christmas. I was suffering from not having a girlfriend, so I complained to my friend, and finally said: I have to find someone to have dinner with me tonight. My friend hit me with more than a dozen question marks in a row. Me, embarrassed.

67. Thinking back to the time when KFC launched Liuxiang to spread its wings, I always thought that Liu Xiang was the spokesperson for KFC because I didn’t read the advertisement and only listened to other people’s words. When I arrived at Ken, I told the waiter directly that I wanted Liu Xiang to spread his wings.

68. The president of our university used to teach us calligraphy. When talking about his experience, he said that in the year of one's life, one should wear red. He said: That year, I had nothing (red clothes). wear. As a result, the whole class laughed wildly.

69. I just bought a house. I called a buddy in excitement: I bought a house, but it’s only a dime room (I forgot to say the word “blank”) and it still needs to be renovated. My buddy said: Is there only one toilet? So where do you live?

70. The high school geography teacher was an old man who asked us to take notes and said: Zg has a vast land and abundant resources. The whole class was speechless. Then the old god said: The natural zone is called the natural zone for short.

71. Once the mother of a classmate in the dormitory called me. I used to say that he was not here, but this time what I wanted to say was that he had gone out. The result is: he is no longer here

72. I met a colleague in the bathroom at noon. Suddenly I didn’t know what words to use to say hello, so I asked by accident: Have you eaten? After asking the question, I was very annoyed and embarrassed. My colleague replied: "I have eaten. What about you?" I'm dizzy!

73. One day in the biology class, the teacher showed an animal skeleton. Suddenly someone shouted, "It's a bone demon king. It's a joke. Just knock it twice and it'll lie down." At that time, there was a silence in the class, and a cold wind blew by.

74. I went home on the weekend and got addicted to cigarettes after dinner, so I planned to take an excuse to go for a walk. When I was changing my shoes at the door, my dad asked me why I was going there. I said: Go and smoke! As a result, my father found a bag of white sand from my body and beat me severely.

75. I remember the monitor in elementary school as being extremely serious. During a self-study class, the classroom was abuzz with people. After maintaining order several times, the monitor finally couldn't bear it any more. He stood up, slapped the table and shouted angrily: Who is making any more noise? Break his mouth! The whole class was silent.

76. I work in the logistics department. During the Chinese New Year, customers called me to check when the pre-holiday goods would arrive. Because the past few days during the holiday were so confusing, I couldn’t figure out the contents of the order. I asked casually: What are you?

77. MM told me that KFC had a new joint, and asked me to take her to eat it. It was extremely hot in Beijing in those days, and I was groggy. When I got to the restaurant, I looked at the smiling KFC lady. Sentence: Please give me two bloody ones, thank you!

78. When I went to work in the morning, I found that my bicycle was out of gas, so I wanted to ask my mother to push it outside the door to pump it up. As a result, I said: push my tires out. Mom was confused, I smiled and quickly corrected it, and the result was: Give my car some gas!

79. A college senior, studying psychology at jiaoyu. be late. Enter the classroom. He glanced sideways at the blackboard. The old professor was angry and asked his senior sister to answer the questions on the blackboard. The senior sister hesitated for a long time and said: "This is too difficult to explain." The whole class fell on their backs.

80. Once, I went to buy breakfast. When I was queuing up, I found that my usually stern boss was also queuing up. So I was very nervous. After saying hello, I said to the chef: Master, please give me a cup of steamed buns and two soy milk! It was the first time in two years that I heard my boss laugh so loudly.

81. Our company has a car to pick up and drop off work in the morning. Because the car is not big, once, after I got on the car, there was no seat. A male colleague sitting next to me stood up and greeted her enthusiastically. To: So-and-so, sit on my butt! I kept laughing until I got off the bus!

82. Xiao Zhang was going on a blind date, and his mother told him to go and rub your donkey face clean. After a long time without seeing anyone, he only heard the sound of vomiting, vomiting, vomiting, and his mother went to find him. It turned out that he was leading his own donkey, rubbing the donkey's face with tiles desperately, and the poor donkey's face was covered with blood

83. There is another one. When we were in junior high school, we used an electric bell to finish class. Zhong, once after class, the bell was ringing, and the teacher was still there. Suddenly, a boy who was sleeping in class suddenly jumped up from his seat, and yelled: Mom! Get up and cook! It's time for me to go to class!

84. During self-study, everyone was watching the review. GG said to MM: I just memorized the words, please help me write them down. MM doesn’t want to be silent, so GG begs her, please (touch) silence me, (touch) silence me! As a result, MM couldn't bear it anymore and shouted, "Teacher, look, I don't want to (touch) him silently, but he insists that I (touch) silently"

85. It's getting cold, so I want to buy myself some winter clothes. There are also shoes and socks. I went to a clothing store and saw that the style was good. I liked it. I wanted to ask what material it was made of, but then I asked, what are the properties of the clothes? Is it a body flash? I was shocked to realize that I had said something wrong and wanted to cover it up, so I immediately followed up with, "How much gold does it cost!" Then, he walked away in despair, which was so embarrassing.

86. On the factory bus at work, MM asked me: My computer is not working anymore and it keeps dying. I said: Then go back and check for viruses, and remember to upgrade your anti-virus software. Early the next morning, I saw MM again in the car, and I casually asked: Have you checked? how? Then MM said loudly: I was so angry that after checking for a long time, I was told that there was no syphilis. What do you think we should do? That cold feeling at that time is still fresh in my memory now.

87. In high school, I went home with my girlfriend after school. I saw a barbecue vendor at the school gate. My girlfriend said she wanted to eat beef offal because there were many people in front of the grill, and I was afraid that the boss wouldn’t hear. So I shouted loudly: Boss, five skewers of bullwhip! Then there was silence, and three seconds later everyone burst into laughter. The most embarrassing thing about my embarrassment was that my MM then asked me what a bullwhip was, and I had to answer MM very, very quietly: A bullwhip is a cow's tail! Funny quotes from host slips in 2020

"Jordan has handed the torch to a new generation of players, such as Bryant, such as Kobe..." (Note: Bryant is the surname, Kobe is the first name, It’s the same person

Sun Zhengping

Comments: With Han Qiaosheng accompanying him, Sun Zhengping is not alone either. It doesn’t matter. That’s wrong. We are at this level. Han Qiaosheng can still do the same.

The great Italian left back! He inherited the glorious tradition of Italy.

Facchetti Cabrini Maldini's soul is possessed at this moment! Grosso represents the long history and tradition of Italian football. At this moment he is not fighting alone, he is not alone

Huang Jianxiang

Comments Everyone knows that unity is strength. Behind a successful Grosso there must be millions of Italian players. He is not alone...what is he?

Lu Jian revealed himself in his blog: There was a live broadcast of the Qinghai-Tibet Railway. The director told me through the earphone that reporter Zhao Jing was waiting for connection at Golmud Station. I opened my mouth and said: "Hello, Golmud", and everyone in the studio laughed. , said I should add "I am Beijing, I am Beijing".

Lu Jian

The comments are easily reminiscent of "01 (moving unit), 01 (moving unit), I am 03 (moving three), I am 03 (moving three) , Please answer when you hear, please answer when you hear” is a classic clip from war movies in an era when communications were underdeveloped.

During the interactive period of a certain CCTV program, the host said with a smile: "Little users of China Mobile and China Unicom, please... (users of China Mobile and China Unicom's PHS)"

Liu Fangfei

Comments Nowadays, children all have mobile phones, and the host did not forget to remind the children to send text messages.

On the CCTV Happy Dictionary program, because the contestants rushed to answer the question in advance, the host said: "You snatched my 'beginning' before it came out."

Wang Xiaoya

Everything in the review is correct. The only mistake is that the last word of the show hosted by Xiaoya always comes out too slowly. Unfortunately, this time it is the turn of the word "beginning".

Dear viewers, the Mid-Autumn Festival has just passed, and I would like to wish you all a happy old age. ——Han Qiaosheng

Comments It seems that Teacher Han especially likes to celebrate the holidays. The festive atmosphere has extended to the Mid-Autumn Festival, and he did not forget to pay New Year greetings. It is really polite

"With lightning speed The power of hiding one's ears and stealing the bell..." (Asian Games

- Han Qiaosheng

Comments on this sentence later became a classic that went viral on the Internet, "thunder is not as fast as it is to cover one's ears" and "cover one's ears and steal the bell" from then on) A double and a double hit, creating a great story on the Internet.

Team ZG took a shot and was bravely saved by Ou Chuliang

——Han Qiaosheng

Comments on the goal. People are flying away, I am blind about the ball, who am I afraid of? I have the courage to look at the overall situation.

"Shooted the ball into the goal... Let's take a look at the slow motion." ....Oh,...it was pushed with the head."

——Han Qiaosheng

Comment: Maybe Teacher Han's eyesight was a little awkward at that time, but it turned out that kick was At one end, I suggest you use Runjie Eye Drops in the future

"AC Milan is like a computer with a large memory, as big as a Pentium II generation, but it doesn't run fast. It may be a virus. It seems that the coach is infected." You need an anti-virus hard drive.”

——Han Qiaosheng

Comments: Teacher Han always likes to be different from others and likes to come up with something new. Even metaphors must be unique. The analogy between a team and a computer is novel enough, but computers use "a hard drive" for anti-virus - this is quite rare

- Fans summed up a Han Qiaosheng law: Han Qiaosheng was explaining the game. , looking at player A, thinking of player B, saying player C, but actually referring to player D. Classic funny quote that shocked the audience - super embarrassing slip of the tongue

My college roommate, Brother Niu, is eating steamed buns. I want to eat them too: Brother Niu, give me a steamed bun!

The teacher criticized the classmate: Pick up the class Desk, stand behind the door! This poor classmate actually did it!

When I was in college, in the bridge construction class, the professor asked what kind of supports were needed to build a mountain bridge. The answer is T-string. A buddy volunteered to answer: T-string!

I just finished clicking on the equipment in the game and finally decided to go to the bar to celebrate.

I asked the waiter for a beer, and the waiter asked: Do you want it frozen? I nodded, I'd better order 10!

A friend’s sister looks like Gillian, and she brought her to play with us that day. A buddy went to try to please her and said: They say you look like Gillian, but you really do, especially Now this expression.

A buddy walked into the barber shop absent-mindedly after watching the AV. The barber asked: Sir, what kind of haircut are you going to get? The buddy said: Breast D!

When I was in junior high school, a classmate was playing the airplane in the GB machine in class, and his deskmate wanted to play for himself. The classmate was not upright. The classmate stood up, pointed at the classmate indignantly and said: Teacher , he takes a class to masturbate!

When I was in college, I saw a female teacher wearing a very beautiful skirt, and I wanted to flatter her. I wanted to say: Teacher, your skirt is so beautiful. I don’t know what I was thinking, so I said it. Teacher, your skirt is so slutty!

A hawker was buying watermelon and asked him: Is your watermelon red? The hawker replied: Very red, as red as watermelon!

After eating noodles, beef noodles, I called the boss: Why is there no flavor? The boss looked at the bowl and said: Why not? Is this smell bigger than chicken shit?

A friend was an artilleryman. One day, he met his comrade on the street and happily took him home. After returning home, he originally wanted to introduce to his wife: This is my former comrade-in-arms, but he didn't know which nerve was short-circuited, so he said to his wife: This is my former comrade-in-arms!

In the cafeteria. Several people talked about the fact that the steamed buns here only have skin but no meat. After the discussion, a buddy went to buy steamed buns. He was probably affected by what he just said, and said: Master, give me some foreskins!

I went to the business hall of China Unicom to inquire about the latest package. The customer service lady introduced the new Up force. At this time, she asked: How does your M-Zone charge?

After the tattoo was completed, Xiaoqiang rushed into the dormitory excitedly and announced to everyone: Look at my bra!

A man was in a karaoke bar. He ordered a beer and drooled at the beautiful woman. The waiter asked: Sir, do you want a big cup or a small cup? The man said: I want a D cup!

When I was in elementary school, a man was a bully and often bullied his classmates. On this day, he had a dispute with a classmate. He wanted to say arrogantly: Please, come and hit me! But I didn’t know which nerve I had picked up, and said: Please, come to me!

When ordering, my colleague originally wanted to order shrimp vermicelli stew, but, I don’t know what he was thinking, he ordered shrimp Durex!

When I was in elementary school, my class teacher’s surname was Wang. Because of his tough personality, he was called Tiger King. On this day, I met him on the street and said hello: Hello Tiger Wang! Wang Laohu actually smiled and nodded! Classic slip of the tongue (not original)

1. While queuing up in the cafeteria, I heard a boy next to me say: Master, a bowl of cauliflower soup! (Seaweed and Egg Drop Soup) Haha, I laughed so much that I sprayed soup.

2. One day I was eating very slowly and very hungry at a rice noodle shop. Finally, I couldn't hold it back anymore and I slapped the table and roared. I originally wanted to say that if the rice noodles were not served, I would flip the table over!

The result was: Boss!!!! If you don’t serve rice noodles, I will eat the table!!!!

The whole store was silent for 3 seconds and then burst into laughter under the table, which was embarrassing

3. I once went to buy mutton skewers and held out 4 fingers to the boss to ask for 3 mutton skewers

How many of them did the boss have?

I stretched out 3 fingers again and said 4

4. Our general manager’s surname is Zhou. One time he called me while I was driving. When I was nervous, I opened my mouth and said: Zhou. Prime Minister

5. My surname is Zhu, and I manage the computer room of my unit. Someone once called me on my cell phone: Chief Chicken, are you in the pig room? At that time, I cursed the guy wildly

6. The unit’s congratulations, a leader said: I wish everyone good health. Hold it in, I’m out of words.

7. My parents were arguing, and my dad angrily said, "Get out of here!"

8. When I was playing basketball in high school, A got the ball and passed it to B selflessly. B scored easily. After a while, B got the ball, and A shouted to pass the ball to him. But B throws the ball himself. As a result, A shouted angrily. I was really blinded just now

10. In my impression, the squad leader in elementary school was extremely serious. During a self-study class, the classroom was full of people. After the squad leader maintained order several times, Finally, I couldn't bear it anymore, I stood up and slammed the table and roared: Whoever keeps arguing, cut his mouth off!!! The whole class was silent

11. I just went to college and was in military training. The company commander didn't know where the accent was. Yell the command and drill to the left! Drill right!

13. A colleague asked me yesterday. How to write the festival section? I answered: Add a festival stanza under the prefix "草" and remove the prefix "草"! Everyone burst into laughter! I didn’t react for a while!

14. During lunch, my mother gave me a pot of carrots. Go ahead and cut the carrots into diced meat!

15. When I was looking for a job, the examiner asked me which year I graduated. I originally wanted to say the year 2000, but then I got excited and said, "Two thousand years ago." What was even more shocking was that the examiner actually said "Oh," and said, "A student of Confucius."

17. The physics teacher talks about waves. This is a thick spring. I push it from both ends to see if it becomes dense (constipated)?

18. While drinking with the leader and others, he raised his glass and loudly said: Let us die together! My brain was too hot at the time...

19. Boss, are you there? Toilet paper to satisfy hunger?

21. Once I went to the market to buy vegetables and prepare for a dinner party. A Korean friend bought lettuce for 2.4 yuan. He gave all the change he had to the vendor and was still short of a dime, so he The hawker said--

I gave all my hair to you, so there is no more hair.

The hawker was silent for a long time, and then replied -

I don’t want your hair anymore.

22. The manager usually tells smokers in meetings: Smoking will be strangled to death!!

24. At noon one day, my mother asked my brother to move the dining table to the side. My brother didn't move for a long time, and my mother said this in a hurry. Do you hear me? !Tell you to move the table two kilometers to the side

25. Once I helped my boss book a hotel and wanted to ask if they had any services such as free Internet access, but I couldn’t figure out how to say it. So I asked the other party: Excuse me, do you have any special services here? The other party: What? Special services: We are a regular hotel!

26. The fourth person in the dormitory got out of bed and looked for slippers for a long time. He didn’t find any slippers. I want to ask everyone, why are my slippers gone?

27. While shopping, my friend suddenly exclaimed: Wow. **bookstore! I was shocked, and when I looked up, I saw a plaque with four big characters on it: Foreign Languages ??Bookstore!

28. When I was in college, I heard a girl ordering food. Master, stir-fry a plate of hot and sour potato shreds, without the potatoes!

29. Just over 10 minutes into class, my deskmate raised his hand and said, "Teacher, I want to use the toilet."

The English teacher said unhappily: How old are you to still go to the toilet?

30. After the union chairman gave an impassioned speech, the last sentence reached a climax. Comrades, let us do better work this year than next year! Everyone fell down.

31. Dinner with a group of friends

One of them was probably betrayed by his brother. He was so depressed that he drank a lot of beer, then stood up with a red face and yelled. A shout

Brother! Not for sale!

I guess I wanted to say that brothers are not for betrayal

At that time, there were more than a dozen people at our table and they all fell down