Avoidant attachment is a manifestation of loving a person deeply.

Avoidant attachment is the expression of loving a person deeply;

1, afraid that the other person doesn't really like himself.

People with avoidant attachment actually have a strong desire and extreme fear for intimacy. On the one hand, he secretly hopes that the person he likes can unswervingly confess to himself, but on the other hand, he will unconsciously doubt each other's love.

For example, if the other person can't find the right person, choose him. If there is a better choice, will he be left behind? When he is shrouded in this anxiety, he will take the initiative to stop the other person from approaching to protect himself from harm.

2. Pay special attention to negative information in feelings.

An avoidant attachment person will pay special attention to the negative information in feelings, and he will amplify the negative feedback he gets in feelings. For example, if a lover doesn't reply to his message in time, he may suspect that his lover doesn't love himself. If the lover doesn't find his negative emotions at the first time, he will feel that the lover doesn't care about him.

It is exclusive to express intimate relationship with lovers.

People with avoidant attachment will feel particularly uncomfortable emotionally. No matter how much he likes each other, it will be worse for you to make him say "I love you" than to kill him. In addition, he will not express his desire for lovers like ordinary people. For example, he doesn't make some intimate moves in front of his lover, and he doesn't hug or kiss his lover actively.

4. Very independent emotionally

The best emotional view of avoidant attachment is to remain independent and not bring pressure and burden to lovers. When he is in trouble, he will not take the initiative to ask for help and seek the care and support of his lover. Instead, he will solve the problem silently.

Avoidant attachment personality will be cured by the following types of people:

1, fully accept and tolerate his people.

Avoidant attachment rarely shows the need for his lover, but what he really needs is the sense of security and trust perceived from his lover. Research shows that although avoidant attachment people say they can live well without intimacy, their positive emotions and self-esteem will be improved when they find themselves well accepted by others.

Therefore, people who escape attachment are actually very proud types. He may seem cold to you, but in fact he is very happy with your closeness and firmness.

2. People who communicate sincerely

People with avoidant attachment sometimes refuse to respond and reveal their inner thoughts and feelings. At this time, if his other half is also an emotional person who avoids communication, their relationship will be easily alienated. A lover who knows nonviolent communication and sincere attitude can make him feel the needs and sincerity of his lover and make him more open.

3. Give him a safe space.

Avoidant attachment is like a hedgehog with thorns on its back. Only when he feels that his surroundings are safe enough will he tentatively stretch out his limbs and open his soft belly. A person who is emotionally stable, willing to accept and tolerate him unconditionally, and who can understand that his indifference is a defense way can let the avoidant attachment gradually put down his inner guard.