Chasing funny messages from girls.

1, don't be crazy with me, my eldest brother Qin Shihuang! Don't pretend with me, the Central Committee of the Communist Party of China is behind me. If you don't believe me, bin Laden is my uncle. Bomb first, then poison. If you refuse to obey again, the registered policeman is my aunt. Change your account to a pig!

2. How much I love you, but you turn a blind eye; I * * * discharged to you, and you * * * pretended not to see it; I * * * am going to jump off a building, and you * * * will turn back; You * * * come to their senses, and I * * * just landed!

3. When a meteor falls in love with the earth, it will fall without hesitation, just for that moment; When the cloud falls in love with flowing water, it will fall without hesitation, just to solve the pain of acacia; As soon as I think of you, I will not hesitate to pay a dime to tell you in advance: Happy June 1st, little P-boy!

You drag a pig shopping, and you look very happy. I passed by and said sympathetically, "Look at a person's grade and who he is with." Before I finished, I saw the pig abandon you with disdain.

One day I asked you if you were a pig, and you answered no, being beaten-dishonest! The next day, I asked you if you were a pig, and your answer was, beaten-not modest! On the third day, I asked you if you were a pig, but you didn't say a word and were beaten wildly-even if you were a pig, you still dragged on! ! !

6. It's the end of the month. If you still have something to say, please read this tongue twister after me: level 1 difficulty: nonsense, waving phone bills. Level 2 difficulty: the phone bill will evaporate. Level 3 difficulty: playing nonsense and volatilizing phone bills!

7. College students = eat+sleep+fall in love with pigs = eat+sleep, so college students = pigs+fall in love with more college students-fall in love = pigs, that is, college students don't fall in love with pigs.

8, affectionate days, affectionate places, affectionate I am waiting for you. I miss you with a lonely pillow: I love you+miss you+hope you+miss you+wait for you = I can't live without you, I love you-Xizhilang cici jelly!

9. God bless me. Bless those who forget me, don't contact me, don't call, don't send text messages, don't miss me, don't miss me, and my mobile phone falls into the toilet. Amen! By the way, let the water flush!

10, it rains in every city, just like I miss you everywhere. Missing is a kind of fruit, sweet and sour, full of memories in the dark. I miss you and want to crush you with uncertainty ~ ~ ~

1 1. What happened? I just called your cell phone. After the bell rings, the user is eating grass, please don't disturb! I can't believe it. Call again and say: the subscriber you dialed has been sent to the slaughterhouse. Please share it later! Are you okay? !

12, days without you/blue days without you/upset/life without you/it's really hard/when can I really have you/my dearest ... not beauty, not you, but money!

13, if the ear itches, it proves that someone misses you; If your eyes itch, it proves that someone wants to see you; If your lips itch, it proves that someone wants to kiss you; If your body itches ... stop dreaming and take a shower! ! !

14, I saw you that day. You are very uncomfortable sitting in the sun. I asked you what you were doing, and you smiled mysteriously: "Keep your voice down, no one will call me an idiot after tanning!" " "

15, the legend of Cupid: one arrow through the heart represents love at first sight, two arrows through the heart represent wishful thinking, and three arrows represent three lucky lives. I'm shooting at you ... just wait to become a hedgehog!

16, I am an onion, standing in the wind and rain. Who dares to dip me in the sauce? His ancestor K walked across the south and across the north. I drink water behind the toilet, run over my legs on the train tracks and kiss pigs. what are you reading? Kiss you!

17, one day you won the lottery and traveled by plane for free. Sadness: The plane crashed. Hi: There are parachutes. Sadness: I can't open it. Hi: There are haystacks on the ground. Sadness: There is an iron fork on it. Hi: I didn't fall on the fork. Sadness: I didn't fall on the haystack either. . .

18, hey! I dreamed that you were swimming in the water last night. I looked worried, so I called you to come up quickly. I didn't expect you to ignore me and look up at me: what are you yelling at? Haven't you heard that dead mice are not afraid of cold?

18 melatonin said that if you don't go to cut class today, you will skip professional courses. Hui Renbao said he fled, and I also fled. Dabao said you escaped today? Hao Di said that everyone's escape is the real escape. Colgate said that our goal is that no one will attend classes!

19, the three most popular words during the Iraq war: peace, war and discovery. Connect these three words and read them aloud for three times, and a historical unsolved case will be solved.

20. If autumn leaves, I will wait for you in the snow. If the world dies, I will love you in heaven. If you leave, I will miss you with tears. . . If I leave, . . . . The feed is in the trough, don't starve yourself!