Can you be like the gold medal mediator Hu Jianyun?

Since the broadcast of "Gold Medal Mediation" on Jiangxi Satellite TV, Zeng Yan Hui, the chief psychological consultant of Jianhe Psychological Counseling Center, was deeply moved by the personality charm of the mediator Mr. Hu Jianyun. Men have expressed their hope to learn from Mr. Hu Jianyun, and some netizens even asked Mr. Hu Jianyun to introduce some related books on the Internet, so that he can quickly become an excellent and attractive man. As a woman, I am glad to see this phenomenon of learning from Mr. Hu Jianyun in the society. I believe that one more man in the world who learns from Mr. Hu Jianyun will certainly add a happy woman. My husband is also an excellent psychological counselor. His personality is almost the same as that of Mr. Hu Jianyun, but I am still willing to think with men about how to become a top person like Mr. Hu Jianyun, a gold medal mediator. Some netizens thought of studying first, which is for sure. To be a knowledgeable and tasteful person, a certain level of education is necessary. I have read Mr Hu Jianyun's resume. He has a master's degree. Seeing this, maybe 80% of men will drum in their hearts and feel that this first one is not qualified. Personally, I don't think people below the master's degree should be discouraged. Diploma is not equal to level. It is said that Mr. Hua, a famous mathematician, has only a junior high school diploma, but he is still admired and loved by people all over the country. No matter whether you only have a junior college degree or you are unfortunate enough to drop out of primary school, as long as you can study hard in your spare time, you will make progress every day. There is no threshold in the temple of knowledge, and there is no limit to learning. As the saying goes, "there are poems and books in the belly"! As long as you read more books, your manners and temperament will naturally shine. The second thing I think is to know the law. I don't know if Mr. Hu Jianyun has studied law, but Mr. Hu Jianyun's analysis and judgment of the facts at the gold medal mediation scene is based on the law, which is fair and convincing. In modern society, some men don't study law and don't know how to use it to protect themselves and safeguard their rights. They only believe in their fists and think that violence can conquer everything. A man brandishes his fist in the family to create domestic violence, a group of men brandish knives and sticks in the streets and lanes to create social chaos, and a country or an army shoots to create war. Since ancient times, many men have paid blood and even precious lives for these struggles. Unfortunately, this world is not a natural battlefield, and this society is not a legendary underworld. Comrade Yao Jiaxin proved to us with personal experience that killing people requires paying for their lives, and those who don't know the law have no future. People who waved their fists paid a heavy price, but they didn't get the dignity and status they wanted. On the contrary, they are gentle people like Hu Jianyun, vaguely revealing a majestic and inviolable force. He used the weapon of law to help the weak protect their legitimate rights and interests and safeguard social fairness and justice. Such a man is truly powerful and deserves the respect of the whole society. The third is to learn ethics. Mr Hu Jianyun is a master of ethics. He always hits the nail on the head when analyzing family problems. Many problems in the family are caused by some people's ignorance of family ethics. When it comes to family ethics, many people will think of the ancient monarch and his son, as well as the husband who respected his wife and felt dismissive. There are many unreasonable and even inhuman aspects in the ethical code of feudal society in China, which makes us modern people have a headache when we think of the word ethical code, and think it is the dross of feudal society. Therefore, parents in modern families ignore moral education for their children. In fact, ethics is a profound and practical knowledge of real life. In the family, if the elders are orderly, respect the old and love the young, the father is kind to the son, and the husband and wife love each other, there will be no big problem in this family. On the contrary, if everyone in the family is selfish, parents don't help educate their children, the younger generation doesn't respect their elders, and husband and wife don't trust and care about each other, then the family will be in ruins. If a man can respect his parents, educate his children and love his wife, he will certainly be able to run a very happy and harmonious family, and he will also be sincerely respected and loved by his parents, wife and children. The fourth is to learn to speak. Speaking is an art, as the saying goes, "Good words are warm in three winters, and bad words are cold in June". Mr Hu Jianyun's mediation was very successful, because he made good use of the art of language. Friends who often watch Gold Medal Mediation know that Hu Jianyun successfully mediated the dispute, but Hu Jianyun never called names. I remember a husband wanted to keep his wife, because she was leaving him, so he kept threatening to hit her, trying to make her afraid to leave him again. I remember Mr. Hu Jianyun asked her husband, "You have been threatening your wife and beating her like this. You think you're doing this ... "At that time, I thought he would say," Are you doing the right thing? " Or "Is it legal for you to do this?" To my surprise, he asked, "Do you think this is effective?" This sentence suddenly shocked my husband. The husband always acts according to his intuition, and he never thinks whether what he does is beneficial or harmful to the goal he wants to achieve. From this sentence, the gentleman began to reflect on his way of dealing with problems, and he finally began to think that he might have done something wrong in many places. The genius of Mr Hu Jianyun is that he doesn't have to tell his husband what he did wrong, but let him think about his own problems. Instead of telling him directly: "It is wrong for you to hit a woman. Stop hitting her. " "If you hit her, you will break the law and you may be arrested for going to jail." Hu Jianyun's method is much more effective. Because, he does not look at this problem from the public's point of view, nor from the victim's point of view, but from the perpetrator's own point of view. He asked the abuser, "After you hit her, is she closer to you or farther away?" "Did you achieve your goal?" This makes the abuser see very clearly that what he did not only caused great harm to his wife, but also was very unfavorable to himself. Therefore, he quickly admitted his mistake and decided to win back his wife's heart in a new way. As ordinary people, we don't all need to be gold medal mediators, but we will inevitably encounter many problems in our lives, and we need to use the art of language to solve these problems. For example, the tension between the famous mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in China is believed to be something that every married man must face. It is a man's responsibility to be a gold medal mediator in the family and mediate his wife and mother into good friends and relatives, and it is also to create a good family environment for himself. Settle this family problem, men, and a happy life is near you! As a woman, this is my advice to those who want to be Hu Jianyun. Mr Hu Jianyun is a broad and profound living textbook. It takes a long time to become a person like Mr. Hu Jianyun. But I believe that as long as men experience with heart and practice constantly in life, they can become a smart, witty, humorous, responsible, popular and trusted man.