How to deal with classmates who failed to confess their feelings Zhihu

How to deal with a classmate who failed to confess, let’s learn from the classmate below.

My classmate in college has failed to confess his love for nearly a year. Last night I saw him talking about being single. For a moment, I felt angry and my heart beat faster. Then I gradually calmed down and even felt like laughing. .

It was very embarrassing at first when my confession failed. I couldn’t see each other in class. We were good friends before. Before I confessed, I was always worried that we wouldn’t be good friends after the failure. But when he said that, I forgot about it. After the incident, when we were still good friends, I was very courageous and thought that I don’t need you as a friend. At first, I was unwilling to talk to him or have contact with him, and acted very arrogant, but I knew how much I felt in my heart. How uncomfortable it is to have low self-esteem.

Later, I gradually couldn’t help but chat with him on my mobile phone and ask him some common questions, such as what homework the teacher left today, whether he had the answer, etc. Sometimes I would be very happy if he took the initiative to talk to me, but if he answered me coldly, I would be very angry. Several times I swore that I would be a fool if I tried to find him again, but every time he took the initiative to find me again, I couldn't help but chat with him. After all, I still liked him very much~

This is how I remained better than a stranger. We had a better relationship, until one day he overwhelmed the last bit of my dignity, and I made up my mind not to have any contact with him (thinking about it now, it’s still because I couldn’t let go), and used a mobile phone app to record how many days I didn’t talk to him. When I saw him, I didn’t even say hello, I walked past him very coldly, and so on for a while...

Until recently, I To Our Simple Little Beauty aired, Chen Xiaoxi’s Minglang Girl’s Courtship I was deeply moved. I thought about whether I was not trying too hard to not chase him after he was rejected. At least I have to pursue him for a while. I also thought about whether I should look for him again and try harder. But within a few days, I saw what he had posted. The picture showed his two hands holding a girl’s hand, and I felt as I said at the beginning.

Today, my good friends accompanied me to play video games, sing, play billiards, and eat. From their mouths, I learned that he was indeed single, and how he met this girl and ended up with her. together. He said that the girl looked very ordinary and he didn't know why he liked her, but he just liked her very much. I felt particularly uncomfortable when I heard it, because I knew he had told others before that he didn't want to be with anyone in college. After the confession failed, I kept using this reason to comfort myself, thinking that it didn't matter if he didn't like me, as long as he didn't like other people either. Now my last hope is gone.

I still felt sad when I was alone. Suddenly I didn’t know what I was going to do, what I was going to do in the future, and I couldn’t get interested in anything. Then I started browsing Zhihu to seek help. When I saw this question, I wanted to record my feelings.

Maybe my answer is a little off-topic, so I’ll bring it back now. I have seen a warning before: "Don't like your classmates, it will be very embarrassing if you fail to express your feelings." Now that I think about it, this is really the case, but I still don’t regret it. I feel that I am very brave. Now that this situation has been sent, you can choose to speak normally, although you are very abnormal in your heart, and maintain a fake friendship; you can also choose to ignore it and never interact with each other until death. Just like this, day by day slowly passes, and either you find someone or he finds someone, or, even better, you two are together.

This is the first time I write such a long answer on Zhihu, and it may not be of much help to everyone. I always feel that no one will teach us how to forget or how to get out of love after falling out of love. Only we ourselves cry at night. Then continue to persevere the next day. I hope we can all become better people~

(PS: Today is the 124th day of no contact with him)