Jokes that make people laugh

Jokes that make people laugh

Jokes that make people laugh. Telling jokes seems to be a skill that each of us has, and many people in our lives can tell some humor. With just a few words, they can bring people happiness and a good mood. The following are jokes that make people laugh. Jokes that make people laugh 1

1. If you can’t close your eyes in class, can you still hold on to your face?

2. A student during the day and a beast at night; a professor during the day and a beast at night.

3. If life is about refreshing, copying and pasting, can everything be logged out, shut down and restarted?

4. If I learn electric welding, will it make your eyes shine?

5. The secret to staying young: lying about your age.

6. God created you, so there is a fool like you in the world.

7. Cheating is no longer popular now, but handing in blank papers is popular.

8. Although you are single, you are as fat as two people.

9. Others have a background, but I only have a back view.

10. When I was a child, I often liked to comb my hair like adults. Only when I grew up did I realize that adults don’t have any hair.

11. Why is the RMB so expensive? Because it is endorsed by Mao Zedong.

12. You get up early, I get up early, and we are together sooner or later.

13. Who blurred your eyes, even you dare not look down on me.

14. Except for my bad temper and gaining weight, everything else is fine.

15. Sleeping is my specialty, but the school does not offer this course.

16. Tokyo, Nanjing, and Beijing, but there is no Xijing! Do you know why? Because it was taken away by Tang Monk.

17. Falling in love is too difficult, please help me.

18. Only those who have wifi and no password are good Chinese citizens.

19. One thing is to study history carefully, maybe you will travel through time that day.

20. Outside the Qingshan Tower, outside the building, you and the mistress are going to jump off the building. I am shouting "Come on" from downstairs.

21. The computer seduced me, bye school, I no longer love you.

22. The weather today is very good, suitable for playing and hugging.

23. If the whole world doesn’t want you anymore, remember to come to me. I know several human traffickers.

24. Are you Qiugao? I am almost pissed off by you.

25. What defeats me is not naivety, but naive enthusiasm.

26. I smoke to continue the fragrance of our family.

27. You fall against the wall and rely on everyone to run. These days, you can’t even rely on yourself.

28. A woman who cannot cry is a monster, and a woman who can only cry is Feiwu.

29. Stop it, let that girl go, you bastards, let me go first.

30. Du Niang knows more than me, so if you have any questions, you are right to go to her.

31. If you can’t do anything, you will be poor and happy every day.

32. You don’t like me. This is a disease. It must be cured.

33. I always mean what I say, and I will pay you back whatever I owe you this time in my next life.

34. The speed at which I make money can never keep up with the speed at which I spend money.

35. Tang Monk rides a magical horse, Wukong rides floating clouds, Bajie loves Xiao Yueyue, and Sha Monk pretends to be a sharp brother.

36. The happiest thing about going to work is that the boss is not around.

37. The highest state of a woman is that of a monster, but you have become a monster.

38. I am a traditional man, so I have always supported the system of three wives and four concubines.

39. Three elements of success: 1. Persistence 2. Shamelessness 3. Persistence without shame.

40. Judging from your appearance, if you are thrown into a pile of monkeys, no one else can tell which one is you.

41. Why do successful people like to feed you chicken soup? Because they have finished eating the chicken.

42. Whiteness covers all ugliness, but one fatness destroys everything.

43. Confessing love is not necessarily a good thing, as it looks shady.

44. The wind was so strong that it messed up my hair and blew your wig off.

45. There are some things that do not need to be argued. Obey on the surface but resist behind the scenes.

46. If the head shape is not firm, love is uncertain; if the leather shoes are not shiny, you cannot find a partner.

47. When I look forward to a life that I can touch again and again, I always get deception.

48. In fact, you are quite useful sometimes, because I naturally lose weight just by looking at you.

49. Steamed buns are more expensive, while steamed buns are more expensive. If you have roasted pork ribs, you can throw away both.

50. Once upon a time, there was a girl who loved to stay up late. Later, when she tied her hair up, she looked like an elder brother.

51. The weather forecast says there will be no wind today. It seems that I will be hungry again.

52. Cows fly in the sky because you blow on the ground.

53. I am an angel. The reason why I cannot go back to heaven is because of my weight.

54. What are you doing with nothing to do? Go out and bask in the sun so that photosynthesis can run.

55. Learning is endless, so I have never graduated.

56. I like talking to people, so you, who are not human, please step aside.

57. Hello, I am a country bumpkin who is a friend of a rich man.

58. My bestie is a Chinese-American. I am a Chinese-American.

59. When I paid the mobile phone bill, I realized that my words could be worth astronomical prices.

60. You are fascinated by beautiful women. No wonder others call you a pervert. Jokes that make people laugh 2

1. You don’t have to pretend to be like me, he is also crazy.

2. Be a temperamental boy and pick up classy ladies.

3. You let me know what hell is like.

4. Driving is not difficult, except for the newcomers!

5. Falling in love at first sight will fade again and again, and it will be exhausted after three.

6. An apology is not enough to be forgiven.

7. Women are nothing, but brothers are king.

8. I want to express that I want to torture the school to death!

9. Don’t blame others for stepping on you if you have a shoe-pad face.

10. If you get angry for one minute, you will lose 60 seconds of happiness.

11. Come on, drag me out, slice and fry the green peppers!

12. Don’t compare yourself to me, I’m too lazy to compare with you.

13. You get what you pay for, and you won’t feel hungry after eating porridge.

14. I just want to turn around gracefully, but unexpectedly I hit the wall beautifully.

15. Rain is born, not genius!

16. Our goal: focus on money and make big profits.

17. Even though I know it’s just a drama, I still want to continue acting with you.

18. The hooligans are not scary, but the hooligans are educated.

19. How can I protect myself if I don’t become a tomboy?

20. Even if you didn’t give me something, does she also have a share?

21. Don’t ask for high scores and get money, just want to celebrate the New Year at 60.

22. Missing someone after a breakup is not called yearning, it’s called being mean.

23. I just want to be by your side, even if I don’t speak.

24. Stay away from me, I have no partner, I have a husband.

25. No matter how good the relationship is, don’t violate a person’s taboos.

26. When your hair grows to your waist, I will give you a pair of scissors.

27. I regard you as the only one, please don’t regard me as one of you.

28. In the morning I went to the vegetable market to buy vegetables, and I asked the vendor:

29. I can’t tell you what’s good about you, I just want to see you.

30. If what you give me is the same as what you give to others, then I won’t want it. The aunt in the cafeteria swung the big spoon:

31. An apple a day can drive the doctor away. What's even more powerful is that one head of garlic a day can drive everyone away.

32. There is no fire in the simulated fire, and there is no earthquake in the simulated earthquake. So why is there an exam in the simulated exam? It's not scientific.

33. I still remember that my niece asked me a very profound question. She said, uncle, why does your beard grow on your legs?

34. If a boy’s mobile phone wallpaper It’s you, all the social passwords tell you, so just take his money and go.

35. Every time I post a selfie, I find that my appearance fluctuates. Sometimes I am beautiful, and sometimes I am more beautiful. It is really boring.

36. When they are passionately in love, couples often lament what virtues they have accumulated in their previous lives; after getting married, couples often wonder what sins they have committed in their previous lives. Jokes that make people laugh 3

1. You can’t get many things just by saying you like them, like me.

2. Some people ask why your attitude changes after you catch up. Let me ask you: Do you still read after the exam?

3. I found that I was paralyzed. I tried to tell myself that I had to go to work today, but my body just didn't respond.

4. Give me the little bear in your arms. If you can’t bear to part with it, give it to me too.

5. I don’t know much about music, so I am sometimes unreliable and sometimes out of tune.

6. By the time you show up, the cucumbers and vegetables will be cold.

7. After taking the English listening test, I realized that some words should only be spoken to those who understand.

8. When the weather is cold and the quilt catches a cold, I always feel that I have to stay in bed to take care of it.

9. If I hit you, I will hit you. Do you still have to choose a day?

10. I originally planned to sell the house to support you, but the landlord refused.

11. Most things that good-looking people can do by acting coquettishly, I have to rely on threats.

12. I am a very approachable person. If you don’t believe me, try kissing me.

13. You have to eat well and go to bed early. Don’t stay up late just because you are ugly.

14. Try to understand those people you hate, you will find that the more you look at them, the more you hate them!

15. It’s really too hot today. I want to find someone to have a cold war with for a few days.

16. Playing with people who can play is called playing. Playing with people who can’t play feels like working overtime!

17. Some women wear stockings to look in good shape. There are also some women who wear stockings, which shows that the stockings are of good quality.

18. Yesterday, someone asked me if I was alone on Chinese Valentine’s Day. Nonsense, it’s not a person. Could it be a dog? Now that I think about it, it's true.

19. Don’t go too far when posting selfies on WeChat Moments. We have all met before.

20. Even if you fail ninety-nine times, you must try again to make up the whole number.

21. Research shows that drinking a cup of hot milk one hour before going to bed every night will cost you a few dollars more than people who don’t drink milk.

22. After being single for many years, the most difficult thing is not being lonely, but dealing with seven aunts, eight aunts, and the neighbor’s Uncle Wang!

23. You are irreplaceable, and no one is as ugly as you.

24. Yue Lao! Could you please stop using the fake red string to marry me? It breaks every now and then!

25. Summer vacation is so long, you must find someone who can pick watermelons together.

26. My three strongest heartbeats occurred when I was called on by the teacher in class, when I missed my footing when going down the stairs, and when you looked back at me and smiled.

27. I want to push on my nose to reach my face. But your nose bridge is too high and I can’t push on it.

28. Today, all my energy is not used to love others, but to tear up express delivery.

29. When I am in a bad mood, I make harassing phone calls to others in the middle of the night, waking them up, and then I go to sleep.

30. Ask yourself, if you were someone else, would you be willing to have a relationship with yourself? I dare not even think about how such a blessing could be possible.

31. Before marriage, get closer; after marriage, stay away.

32. I don’t want to be single anymore. I really want to have someone who will grab food for me when I eat, grab my computer from me during the day, grab my quilt from me at night, and grab my razor from me in the morning.

33. I have always had the courage to admit my mistakes and never correct them.

34. God, please don’t let me lose my hair again! I'll trade these ex-parties for you!

35. Chatting with the person I like is like talking to God. You say it, but they never respond.

36. Money is not everything, sometimes a credit card is needed.

37. Someone told me that there is nothing more complicated than love in the world, and I threw a math book in his face.

38. True love is when you clearly think that the other person is a pig, but you are still afraid of being snatched away by others.

39. The only thing I can hold but cannot put down now is chopsticks, and the only thing I can’t get out of is my bed.

40. As long as I have no morals, you can't kidnap me.

41. I am actually not complicated. If you get to know me carefully, you will find that I am nothing but beautiful.

42. I knew you wouldn’t follow me if I stretched out my hand, so I stretched out my leg and tripped you. Sure enough, you stood up and ran after me. So I have to admit: Since ancient times, deep love has never been retained, and it has always been a trick to win people's hearts.