! ! Who can recommend some funny short messages to my new girlfriend?

Of course, the first thing to know is the girl's mobile phone number.

Secondly, you should be interested in her.

Send a short message: "I was very happy to chat with you last time." Can I invite you out to chat again? "

Note: If the girl agrees, the place she is looking for is a quiet bar, so don't go to the restaurant or D for the time being.

Lesson two:

Don't forget to send a short message when you get home from the date: nice talking to you and looking forward to seeing you again. Good night to you.

Let her know that you are a sweet person.

The next day, you can also send her an interesting message, such as:

1. The chimpanzee accidentally stepped on the stool pulled by the gibbon. After the gibbon cleaned it gently and carefully, they fell in love. When asked how they got together, the chimpanzee said with emotion: ape dung! It's all ape shit!

2. I am a bean. I fell down and was very discouraged. What can make me stand up again? The answer is-you. There is such a thing as "pig encouraging beans".

On the birthday of the giant panda, someone asked him what his wishes were. The giant panda said: I have two wishes in my life. One is to find a Chinese doctor to get rid of my dark circles, and the other is to take a color photo.

……

Let her know that you are a humorous person.

Note: Never send pornographic jokes.

Lesson three:

When you get up in the morning, send her a message:

Good morning! The early bird catches the worm. How many did it catch today?

I remember a MM answered me like this:

The early worm is eaten by birds, hehe, I am more like a worm.

Answer: la la la. The late bird catches the worm. I eat, I eat, I eat. Wow, what a big beauty bug! Just right, full. Stay for lunch.

Note: it is a beautiful woman. Girls are vain. Usually, you can send a message like this:

1, I think what you are wearing today is very special and cute.

2. Seeing your beautiful skirt today will make my eyes fall. ~! ~

……

Don't be stingy with your description of beauty, be as beautiful as you want.

Lesson four:

You'll get familiar with it after a while, and it's your turn to play tricks. In ancient times, Emperor Xuanzong of the Tang Dynasty tried his best to bring R litchi to Chang 'an for Bo Guifei's smile. Now use your text message to please the girl you like.

1, suggest playing tricks: If there is an afterlife, let's be mice, love each other silly, live silly, and simply snuggle together silly. When the mountain is closed by snow and ice, we will nest in the warm haystack, I will hold you and feed you rat poison.

2. It's not bad to send an English short message: Hey, what are you doing now? Close your eyes, I will be by your side and miss you day and night!

3. Warm greetings: Are you busy? Nothing, I just want to tell you that I miss you in a way that doesn't bother you. I hope that when you receive my message, you will have a smile on your lips and let your friends around you know that you are happy.

4, teasing, deepening the impression: I said: "You are a pig." You said, "I am a pig." From then on, I called you "pig monster", and finally one day you couldn't stand it and shouted at me in public: "I'm not a pig."

5, or the implied trick is effective: Listen, I want to chase you! I thought you were! It is you that I have been looking for! I will seize this opportunity! I must catch up with you! Dead fly, I'll shoot you! )

6. The advantage of texting is that you can say things that you usually dare not say in person. Even if you are so sour and spiteful, girls like sweet talk and care about others:

If one day, you feel tired, as long as you turn around, my blessing will be by your side, no matter how far away, no matter how many years, this blessing will turn into a blue star, flashing in the morning, flashing in the sunset, flashing in every inch of your life.

Know what I'm doing? Give you five choices: A: I miss you, B: I miss you very much, C: I miss you very much, D: I can't live without you, E: All of the above.

Lesson five:

This lesson is about the quantity and quality of texting:

1, the quantity is small. Girls shouldn't like boys who are full of mothers and fathers. Are you tired of chattering around all the time (catching up is another matter)?

2. Don't always send short messages copied online. Use your own thinking. Since you like her, use your brain and send text messages with your heart.

3, occasionally fishing for three days and drying the net for two days, so I am addicted to it. After repeated violent SMS attacks, I suddenly stopped texting for a day or two. When your message becomes a part of a girl's life, she will wonder why you didn't send me a message today. When she sends you a text message, no matter what she says, you're halfway there.

After giving you enough SMS care, the first message a girl sends you is often a complaint, such as "I'm bored to death" and "I'm about to collapse". Hey, hey, what are you waiting for? Girls are most likely to succeed when they need help most. Please encourage her quickly:

In fact, the sky is blue and the clouds will eventually disperse; In fact, the sea is not wide, and this shore is connected with the other; In fact, tears are sweet, when your heart has a wish; In fact, I hope you are happy every day.

You should stick to the direction of progress. No matter what happens, I will advance and retreat with you. I hope to see a strong me and a strong you! ! !

It is necessary to give her a call after sending a text message.

Lesson 6

Care about the weather, care about mm Send a weather forecast to your MM every day:

The lowest temperature tomorrow 1 degree, and the highest temperature 13 degree. Let me tell you that caring about the weather means caring about you. Don't forget to add an extra dress. (XX, it's yourself)

Do not type the contents in parentheses in a text message. Don't copy mechanically in online short messages. Turn other people's things into your own. That is the highest state!