Is online dating really unreliable?

Is online dating reliable? In most cases the answer is no. Why? We can analyze it from the following three angles.

1. In real life, some people will give up real love and choose online dating for various reasons. For example, there is no time and the circle of contacts is too small. For some married people, online dating is a convenient way for them to escape from an unhappy marriage or seek extramarital excitement. There are many people who use the Internet to defraud money and sex, but it is difficult for us to identify their intentions or real situations through the Internet itself. Some people with ulterior motives may even use your relationship to blackmail you. Therefore, online dating must be done with caution.

2. When there is no way to face each other, both parties will show their best sides to each other intentionally or unintentionally. Each other will use this kind of psychological hint to chin that the other person's imagination is perfect. People who are good at online chatting will sensitively capture each other's interests and preferences, and will continue to strengthen and cater to their preferences during the online dating process. This kind of wishful thinking to strengthen the advantages and ignore the shortcomings can be very dangerous when it cannot be verified by reality.

3. Online dating, as long as both parties have not entered reality. So based only on social software, you will not have a very comprehensive understanding of the other party. Once both parties step out of the virtual world and enter reality, the good image established in social software is likely to collapse. At this time, no matter the QQ message, WeChat message or even the mobile phone number he left for you, you will no longer be able to contact him. The damage caused by this will be difficult to avoid.

So, online dating is very romantic, so be careful!

Is online dating really unreliable? In the past, this objection was very strong, but in recent years, more and more friends around me have met male and female friends through the Internet, and some have even gotten married. Even if they cannot be together, they have become very good friends. It seems that there is no It's not as reliable as you think.

Netizens had a sense of mystery at first, and their curiosity about the other party would increase day by day during the communication and dialogue. They couldn't help but choose to meet each other. Some people were exposed to the light, and some felt that the other party was in line with their wishes. Some of them never contacted me again. In fact, online dating is not terrible, it just provides one more channel to meet more people.

Let’s take a look at the anonymous responses given by friends in their impressions.

There are many more answers that can be viewed in Friends’ Impressions. I believe you must have your own story. It may not necessarily be about online dating, but you must have met strangers online, chatted with them for a long time, or maybe you have never met them in person. Whether online dating is reliable or not, perhaps only those who have experienced it know only themselves. As long as that person is reliable and sincere, giving it a try may be completely different.

What do you think of online dating? You can leave a message below to discuss!

There have been more and more news about online dating recently, such as “A man was cheated on when he was having sex online, and his girlfriend turned out to be a 220-pound man.” “Post-90s online dating gave birth to a child who was unable to raise him and abandoned him.” “Female college student was sexually assaulted to death by netizens. After being brutally tortured, he was strangled and suffocated."

The word online dating began to be frequently associated with those born in the 1980s and 1990s.

In communication on the Internet, people can only rely on one-way text transmission most of the time. Of course, after the popularity of WeChat, voice can also help people in both places convey their feelings.

Friend A is a voice control. As long as a boy has a nice voice, he will get extra points in his heart. In the QQ chat era in high school before WeChat, I met a boy thousands of miles away in Hunan by chance.

In a world of hundreds of millions of people, this 9-digit number just happened to be added.

In this place where you can chat, you can dump all your worries and secrets on him that you can’t find anyone to talk to in real life. And he won't be annoyed, won't say that this is actually your problem, and will appear at any time. He seemed to fit all the molds of an ideal boyfriend. So even A, who has always been rational, fell into despair.

From the first step of chatting on QQ day and night, to sending each other photos, to making hours of phone calls every day, it seems that all the beautiful words of love were created for the two of them.

A likes to listen to him singing, saying that his voice is like the warmth of the winter sun, making people want to sleep. A prepared gifts for boys, wrote a whole diary, and stacked bottles of lucky stars. She was still dreaming about that dream day and night, in which the boy promised to come to her and take her away to give her the life she wanted.

As a result, I dreamed of Christmas that year, and it shattered all over the ground with a clang.

The boy promised to give A a gift on the morning of Christmas Eve. At night, A held an Apple and mobile phone and silently said countless Merry Christmas, but he received a message from the boy at 12 o'clock in the morning. Breakup text message.

He actually cheated on me.

It turns out that Santa Claus not only packs Christmas gifts in socks, but also plays pranks out of boredom.

After the breakup, A did not seek comfort from any friends because she understood that this relationship was a joke in the eyes of everyone.

She couldn't get through the phone, couldn't contact anyone, and didn't even know any of the boy's friends. She was banging around like a headless fly, and her head was bruised and bloody. You can only send messages to a boy every day, but get no response. The most painful thing about online dating is this. He can completely disappear from your world unilaterally, leaving no trace.

Until one day a girl joined her, A didn’t know that the boy had already married and had children. Things like working as a doctor in a certain hospital, and things like not being able to meet someone you like because of emotional injuries were all fake. Even the photos were later found online.

A is angry, angry, crying in bed for several days, what's the use. All I can do is blame myself for not being deeply involved in the world and being blind.

In fact, online dating is just another channel for love, and it is essentially no different from real love. However, this kind of channel requires wild imagination and a progressive understanding like peeling off skin, in order to see the core part of a person's inner self.

You cannot judge the authenticity of his character and the authenticity of his story. Everything you know only comes from his unilateral input.

The other party will never know that you wanted to click on his dialog box a thousand times, but then took it back.

You never know if the other person only thinks of you after being bored for several days, and then flirts with you.

Are there any advantages to online dating? Of course there are. Dialectics tells us that everything has two sides.

The Internet can help expand your circle of friends. Everyone can get to know strangers in any corner of the world through the Internet. The Internet can also relieve loneliness and resolve worries. In some sense, it is a huge emotional recycling bin.

But I have always felt that online dating is unreliable for the following reasons:

1. The other party may be a liar.

I don’t think there is any need to elaborate on this point. There is so much news that I can’t see it.

Once I stayed up all night with my boyfriend at an Internet cafe, and a fat woman who weighed nearly 200 pounds sat next to me. While playing the game, YY called her husband in a sweet voice. In front of her was a table of instant noodles, snacks and Coke.

I don’t mean to discriminate against fat people at all, but you must be cautious when dating online, try to get to know each other as much as possible through various channels, and be even more cautious when it comes to money transactions. Your parents have worked hard to give The money you earn is given away to a stranger you have never met. Is it worthy of your own brain?

2. Intimacy is established too quickly.

In the current fast era of network information, people’s emotional communication has become extremely fast. “In the past, carriages and horses were very slow, and letters were far away, only enough to love one person in a lifetime.” Now, you can make an appointment to meet by shaking WeChat in one night.

A relationship established within an hour may fall apart within an hour of meeting. Intimacy requires various forms of interaction. Holding hands, kissing, and embracing these skin-to-skin kisses all have their value.

3. Idealize the other person.

If online dating wants to go to the end, you must meet in real life. Through early communication, you will more or less idealize the other person. Both the heart and the appearance seem to be highly consistent with your expectations. conform to.

But after meeting each other, I found that the other person was also a big person who could brag and fart, and my expectations instantly turned negative. This is a transitional process. No matter whether he is tone-deaf, has pimples on his face and is slovenly, or has no ability and can only eat soft food, you need to convince yourself to accept the shortcomings exposed by the other person.

The fact is that very few people can fully accept it.

4. No non-verbal clues (such as body language and daily behavior).

Just like the example of friend A I mentioned earlier, once the other party breaks up with her and deletes her contact information, she cannot even be found.

A person's non-verbal clues can reveal some of his core nature. For example, if his shirts are often wrinkled and his collar is stained, this person may be careless and unhygienic. Refusing to give up his seat to an old man on the bus or even swearing at him proves that he must not be a kind person. The personality of friends and family can reflect his values ??and upbringing. These things cannot be expressed through the Internet.

5. It is more difficult than real love.

Are there any online dating sites? Yes. I have met people who ended up getting married and having children because they met in a game.

But those are only a minority after all. Don’t always take chances and think that you will be part of that minority, because whether it is online dating or long-distance love, it actually depends on the maturity and communication skills of the two people. The requirements for psychological quality and psychological quality are very high, and not everyone is suitable.

Many young students from different places break up, get jealous, cheat, have sex, etc. whenever they have a quarrel. I advise you that you are really not the material for long-distance relationships.

On the contrary, if you are comfortable with how two people get along, and as long as you can bear the pain and risk of the two possibly breaking up in the future, no one will stop you if you want to have an online or long-distance relationship.

There are a thousand Hamlets in the eyes of a thousand people. Maybe what I said here is very one-sided, or maybe you still won’t change after hearing a lot from me.

After all, the original intention of finding a lifelong partner cannot be changed.

The emphasis of the word online dating is "love". I just hope you don't rush, take your time, and don't let yourself be spoiled for choice and blinded.

It is the eternal truth of love to prefer lack to excess.

You may also like

Jane Zhang and her mother: It’s really hard to be born a woman

For the first time in ten years, thousands of people are floating books, this is yours Story

May we all be like Ma Sichun's July: If you really love it, you must pursue it

With the continuous development of society, we have now entered the comprehensive Internet era. The Internet has also given birth to many new things, which have brought great convenience to people's lives. Some of them have become an inseparable part of people's lives. Online dating has also become a love trend and has begun to become a common phenomenon. As a result, more and more people are addicted to online dating. So is online dating reliable?

First of all, online dating happens when you don’t know each other’s true situation. In most cases, contact can only be limited to social software. Once both parties meet, they will be hurt. Except for the so-called social software or the mobile phone number the other party disclosed to you, it is difficult to find the other party. Account numbers and mobile phone numbers can be changed at any time. Once contact is lost, the damage he has done to you cannot be undone.

In addition, when the two parties cannot communicate face to face, they will often use their own imagination to completely imagine a perfect object, and they can't extricate themselves from it. .

In real life, too many people go online for various reasons, such as lack of time and too small a circle. Or it may be due to loneliness, unsatisfactory marriage, fraud, etc., and people use their feelings to deceive each other online to achieve their goals. Because we have no way to understand each other's true situation through the Internet.

So we don’t know each other’s true appearance, age, and identity, so we only rely on daily QQ connections on the Internet and the computer to surf the Internet. Maybe even further, exchange phone numbers. His voice can be heard, but no one else can be seen. As the two of them develop over time, they may develop a good impression while chatting.

Maybe he is the kind of person who is good at talking, eloquent and well-spoken. The sweet words spoken on the phone make you feel happy and sweet, and feel that he is your destiny. Everything is perfect, but you must know that in real life, "the heart is still in the belly."

This requires that when you are in a sweet online relationship, you must not let down your guard. Before you meet a real person or enter the other person’s real social circle, you must not reveal your true information, such as your name and job. Location, home address, etc. At the same time, you cannot give all your feelings, just feel them appropriately.

In online dating, you will talk on the phone every day, chatting about everything, and it can always speak to your heart. I can tell jokes to make you laugh and coax you when you are unhappy. You feel that he or she is gentle and considerate, and you fall deeply into it. Here I would like to remind you to pay attention, since he (she) is so good and excellent. Can he or she not find a girlfriend (boyfriend) in real life? What are the chances that such an excellent resource will help you fall in love online? There are many people pretending to be fake on the Internet. They act flawlessly and often make you fall into an emotional trap.

So those who are dating online or want to have experience in online dating should not be overly greedy for the other person’s sweet words and indulge in the other person’s beautiful words online. You must understand that only by meeting each other, getting to know each other's friends, and entering each other's real life circle can we truly know each other and understand each other. Once you find anything wrong with the other party, you must immediately cut off contact.

Also if you don’t know much about his or her work, life, and situation. Every time the other party takes the initiative to contact you, and you hope to see him or her online every day and send you greetings. If it goes on for a long time, you will put yourself in a passive state, silent in your own fantasy, but in reality, you don't even know whether the other person is married. Long-term online dating is a complete waste of your time and energy.

When you encounter a situation where you are completely passive and not taken seriously, being remembered when needed and forgotten when not needed, you must be on guard and be prepared to evacuate at any time. Never Be obsessed with each other.

Although you have been chatting for a long time and finally decided to meet, remember to make preparations in advance, especially those who are students or have just entered society. Because they need psychological support to relieve the pressure of school performance and social hardships, these people are the most easily deceived. When chatting, the other party’s conversation and thoughts are used to determine whether it is really worth meeting.

If you want to meet, you must choose a crowded place, such as shopping malls, parks, and other crowded places. Bring a companion with you when necessary, and never go to a meeting alone. Keep your phone with you at all times and call for help in case of danger. The intimate behavior between two people must not start for the first time, otherwise they will meet a scumbag or a bad person.

Tens of thousands of people date online every year, and many people relieve loneliness and boredom by chatting online. There are also people who met through the Internet and actually got together in real life. Whether online dating is reliable or not, you need to look at it with a normal mind!

As the saying goes, love means living together in the end. Online dating only changes the way of knowing each other, but it does not change the way of falling in love. In the past, we were introduced through friends, and now we know each other through the Internet. It's just that the way of knowing has changed. People can know a person's basic information and personal situation through the Internet. Therefore, online dating is also a new channel for understanding.

Since falling in love requires giving feelings, the feelings mentioned here are not just for fun, but don’t be addicted and don’t be infatuated. After all, they are two people separated by vast distances at both ends of the Internet. Please don't believe that the Internet can really make you fall in love without meeting each other. You must correctly realize that the Internet can only let you know. If you want to fall in love, you must be in reality, and you must have a thorough understanding and development before falling in love. Only in this way will it be safer and more reliable.

No matter what level you talk about online, you must always be vigilant to keep a clear mind. Be wary of the person on the other end of the internet, because you don’t know if what (she) he says is true. Always keep a smart heart and a clear mind so that you don't get stuck in the mud.

In short, it depends on how you treat online dating. Because no kind of love is absolutely reliable, both reality and online dating may hurt people, so there is no need to be too extreme about online dating. It does not rule out that the network is too virtual and mixed, making it easier for people to doubt its reliability. Everyone wants to show their best side, but their shortcomings are easily hidden and undetected due to virtuality. So at least you need to know each other for a long time. If online dating has already formed, then you need to get into reality as soon as possible. Real meeting is the guarantee of gaining complete trust. It’s not that online dating is untrustworthy, but just like reality, it requires caution and true understanding. Although it is difficult, it is necessary. No matter what form of love it is, it requires sincerity. Only two real people with unchanging faith in love can collide with the feeling that they must be together and be together. Although the Internet is virtual, there are still many people who fall in love because of the Internet, and along the way, they get a good relationship with each other.

The main difference between online love and reality is that there are few material things. By participating, you won’t feel the pressure of life, and you will be communicating more through language. Of course, online dating also has the basis for success if both parties are single, sincere to each other, and do not cheat or destroy other people's families. There is no perfect love in reality. There is only the process of unremitting pursuit of love. In imagination, perfection will eventually return to a kind of indifference.

The attitude towards online dating should be: don’t take it too seriously, and don’t take it too extreme. In fact, there is no so-called perfect love in real life. There is only the process of pursuing perfect love with both partners using their own sense of responsibility. Those imaginary romance and perfection will become indifferent as the days go by. True love is based on mutual trust, mutual responsibility, and mutual compromise. It can entertain each other in happy times, and support each other in painful days. Only by treating love in this way can a sense of mutual responsibility be lasting. This is true in reality, and even more so in online dating. . . .

Falling is beautiful and happy. It is not wrong to say that online dating is reliable. After all, the other person is a real person. When we exchange feelings with each other, if you say that he is unreliable, you have to rely on your own eyes. , and still have the brain to distinguish authenticity, otherwise tragedy will easily happen.