20 17 a necessary political news

A joke can make a person feel relaxed when he is unhappy. . Below, I have carefully arranged some paragraphs that spit out the current political news, hoping to help you!

20 17 the most popular joke

At one time, US President Barack Obama and Japanese Shinzo Abe were both attacked by terrorists! A terrorist leader asked the Austrian zebra:+=? Ao Zebra replied: Then he asked Abe:+=? Abe answered. As a result, Shinzo Abe was killed. Before he died, Shinzo Abe asked: Why didn't you kill me? The terrorist replied: You know too much!

Model student: I failed the exam again! Student: Anyway, I will read a book tomorrow. Fashion store owner: It suits you very well. This is tailored for you. Principal: (morning meeting) May I say one more simple thing?

Photographer: You are the most beautiful bride I have ever seen.

"The so-called necessities: goods that your lover's eyes will stay for more than a minute.

The so-called luxury goods: a man earning 30 thousand a month gives it to a woman earning 300 thousand a month.

The so-called accounting: it is an act related to the account book or husband.

The so-called seriousness is an expression that men don't appear when they look at your clothes, but only when they look at your bills.

The so-called fashion: it is something that will upset women and make men crazy.

The so-called mink is the skin of an animal, which can squeeze people dry even after death.

The so-called wedding cake is a kind of food equal to the poisonous fruit that Snow White eats.

The so-called dream lover is a man who can let a woman live a dream life after marriage.

The so-called brain death means that a person is in love.

Eight don't understand: you don't drink the toast, the leader touches it first, the leader goes by car, the leader talks a long story, the leader talks nonsense, the leader takes a shower first, the leader turns over the table, and the leader listens to the cards and you touch it yourself.

The husband came home and found his wife and doctor lying in bed. Doctor: Don't get me wrong, I'm taking her temperature. Husband: If what you put into my wife's body has no scale, you are dead.

The general secretary said, good morning, manager.

A good secretary will say, manager, it's so early ~

A good secretary will say, good morning, manager ~ ~ ~ ~

Because the salesman is busy at work, he is not at home for five days a week, so he naturally apologizes to his wife and wants to make up for her with the whole weekend!

One Saturday, when they were making out in that creaking bed. Suddenly! !

The old lady next door knocked on the wall and shouted, are you finished? ! ! There are seven days in a week! Can't you take a day off?

My younger brother found that he had three testicles. I didn't know if it was normal or not, so I asked my younger brother, but I was still embarrassed.

Brother (shy): Brother, do you think our testicles add up to five normal?

Brother (stunned): Ah! You have four testicles. After talking to the passengers, the captain forgot to turn off the microphone.

Behind every successful website is a naked woman.

20 17 latest joke

Once my best friend drank too much and accidentally rushed into the men's room. In front of all the panicked faces, the goods pretended to be calm and shouted: What are you afraid of? I didn't bring my ruler ~ ~ ~?

Do you know that?/You know what? I really want to take you out to experience the charm of KTV! Do you know what KTV is? Then k stands for you, t stands for you, and finally I'll make a V gesture!

Paired human chromosomes. One day, the old man who taught biology asked slowly: Students, how many chromosomes are right? ? Some idiot in the corner loudly replied:? Yeah! ? The old man nodded calmly and seriously. So, now tell me, what's the purpose of your coming to earth?

? Eleven? A few days ago, I was surfing the Internet at home. My long-lost college classmate suddenly went online on qq WeChat and sent me a message of blessing. The first reaction was that this guy was getting married, so I made up an excuse to answer him decisively. Dude, me? Eleven? Engagement, will you come to my engagement party? Sure enough, he replied:? I'm sorry, me? Eleven? Married, it seems that you can't come either. ? ~ save the ocean.

There is a mother and son in the car. The child is still wearing open-backed pants. The child has been talking. Everyone is looking at him and thinks he is cute. The child suddenly asked his mother:? Why does my sister across the street keep staring at my penis? Then, I heard people around me laughing, and the girl opposite (about a teenager) blushed. Here comes GC, and his mother says: Sister didn't look at you. People have seen too much. ? Why do you embarrass a little girl and everyone around you is holding back internal injuries?

20 17 the hottest joke

I went to the school toilet yesterday, which is the kind of pit after pit with seats separated one by one. When I started to take off my pants, I lost a dime. I feel a little distressed and can't continue to take off my pants. Collapse? Lost another piece, heartbroken! Then there came a sentence from the pit behind:? Damn it, you think this is the wishing pool! ?

My buddy picked up a big dog on the road and took it home because he felt sorry for it? Dogs want to occupy the territory, always pee at home, and they don't change after repeated education. Finally, the friend couldn't bear it, took off his pants and sprinkled a bubble of urine where the dog had just peed, warning the dog that this was Lao Zi's territory. By the way, dogs don't pee at home anymore.

Dating my girlfriend, I bought a yellow plate under the bridge while waiting for my girlfriend, bargained with a middle-aged man and put it in my coat pocket. Go to my girlfriend's house for dinner at night. When I first met my future parents-in-law, I never dared to look up. My girlfriend makes fun of me. What happened? I've never seen you so shy before. ? I whispered: I didn't expect your father to sell CDs! ?

After the two mice got married, the mother mouse became more and more arrogant. One night, the male mouse wanted to scare her, so he went to the door to learn to meow. The wife is not only not afraid, but also speaks softly. Mao Ge, stop screaming. My husband hasn't gone on a business trip yet. ?

The father said sternly to his daughter's boyfriend. You only take my daughter to the movies every day, can't you do something else? The young man was surprised and happy: You mean what else can you do?