I haven’t contacted my boyfriend for 9 days. Does he not love me anymore? There is someone who is very nice to me. Do you want to be with him?

Long-distance love, as the name suggests, is love between two places. With the development of the times, more and more people have to "leave their hometown" for various reasons such as study and further study, work and so on. Therefore, it is bound to cause the separation of lovers. Therefore, there is a new word: long-distance love.

Generally, long-distance relationships are relatively stable and deep relationships. Because maintaining a long-distance relationship requires more endurance, and of course, more gains.

Twelve words of long-distance love

Courage

Long-distance love first requires courage, the courage to challenge reality, the ability to bear The courage to take any risk, the courage to face failure calmly. We must understand that reality is a powerful and invisible force. We cannot predict what will happen, but we can use the courage to contend with this force, and we can also use the courage to accept the result of failure.

Loyalty

Being in a different place without the company of a lover can easily lead to a kind of psychological loneliness, and this loneliness will arouse inner longings and desires. Only absolute loyalty can resist the temptation from the colorful world. Loyalty is not "stupid", it is respect for feelings and self; loyalty is not "infatuation", it is the refinement of a noble personality; loyalty is not "dumb", it is a kind of morality and a kind of responsibility.

Trust

Long-distance relationships give the other person a space for daydreams, but at the same time, they also make the other person feel insecure and cause random suspicions about the other person. Love is often found in These suspicions were slowly dispelled. Therefore, trust is the embodiment of mutual respect and equality between lovers, and building a bridge of trust is the most effective way to consolidate a long-distance relationship. And love that lacks trust will only become vulnerable to mutual suspicion.

Understanding

Understanding is based on trust. Without trust, there is no way to understand. Don’t get angry because one party is busy at work or not contacted in time because of other things. You must know , The pressure of reality will not make life easy for everyone, so we should try our best to control our emotions, learn to understand each other, and be considerate of each other's hard work, and be each other's spiritual support. In this way, understanding will also become a regulator for the relationship between the two to heat up.

Communication

In addition to the distance brought by time and space in long-distance relationships, the psychological distance cannot be ignored. Communication is the best way to maintain feelings and shorten the distance. Improper communication can turn distance into an obstacle, while proper communication can turn distance into a motivation. Therefore, communication is both an art and a science.

Goal

Long-distance love should lock in a goal and should not fend for itself. In fact, the ultimate goal of long-distance love is to create conditions for the same life, because people who love each other cannot live in the same place. In two beautiful but far away environments, the lotuses growing side by side will eventually grow in the same soil. Since they love each other, they must stay together. No matter what, you should strive for it with all your strength.

Edit this paragraph on the principles and experiences of long-distance relationships

No.1 Long-distance relationships are not suitable for people who lack the necessary writing skills to express their passionate emotions.

No.2 Men who just want physical sensations are best not to get involved. Desire can more easily destroy long-distance relationships.

No.3 Long-distance relationships require more financial investment: long-distance phone and Internet charges, travel expenses when meeting, etc.

No.4 This is the most important thing: the man should have experience, be able to coax the woman, and use words to make her feel the loving love that surrounds her.

No.5 The conditions between each other should not be too different, otherwise there will not be enough communication to eliminate the feeling of instability.

No.6 Men must have confidence and women must be patient.

No.7 In a long-distance relationship, don’t talk about rights. Because you love her, you only have obligations to her; because you love her, you only have tolerance for him.

First of all, this code is only for men and women who take relationships seriously. For bold women and playboys, please give up your unrealistic fantasies.

General Principles:

Long-distance relationship means the pain of lovesickness, infinite concern and waiting, and also a great trust in her and belief in this love.

Therefore, people who do not believe in love should not choose, people who do not love deeply should not choose, people with weak will should not choose, people who have been liberated by the modern avant-garde on sexual issues should not choose, and the few remaining people who believe in love should not choose. He is very deep, traditional and strong-willed. Here are some suggestions for long-distance relationships:

The first one: Make good use of the short message function of your mobile phone without affecting his work. On the premise of studying with you, just send a message if you have nothing to do. Firstly, it means that you are thinking of him, and secondly, he can feel your presence immediately. Even if he has any thoughts or is doing something that may damage the relationship between you, he will restrain himself. And if you have ever had the experience of eating or taking a walk with a person but he keeps sending text messages, you can understand how uncomfortable this is for the other person, even if there is someone next to you who has evil intentions and intends to poach you, seeing this kind of How can the scene be so warm that it is temporarily gone. Of course, he may be on mute mode. If he doesn't reply after sending many messages, then make a direct call after confirming that he should be fine, and say what everyone knows. In short, mobile phones are a good thing.

Article 2: Regardless of men or women, except for old lovers, accidents cannot happen during the day, but always at night. So remember to send a text message saying good night every day to make sure he slept where he should. If the management is more strict, you are not allowed to go out alone with the opposite sex at night. If you have something to say hello first, even if you go out, don’t forget to remind him to go back to the dormitory late. Be lenient when it is necessary, be strict when it is necessary, and it’s okay if you don’t listen. Make a fuss, tell him what he does, and you will do the same. Compare your feelings to each other, everyone has a conscience.

Article 3: If he is in the same city as his old lover, be more tolerant. Make sure that he can openly explain his normal interactions with his old lover in front of you. Even if you are angry, don't say it. This is a bit aggrieved, but if he doesn't say anything to you, the situation will only get worse. You must know that you are not with him after all, and if you try to pull this unbreakable thread inexplicably, it will only become more and more messy. In the end, you will hurt others and yourself. Instead, you will ruin your love and push him to his old lover. Generally speaking, not many people go back. Chatting with old lovers is just because of the past, so everyone can talk more openly and happily. Of course, there is a limit to everything. Once you have passed it, you still have to pull him back. Noisy is the best way to pull him back. I think everyone has some experience in making noise, but again, there is a limit to everything, and you can control it yourself. .

Article 4: Speak out your love. No matter how long we have been talking, love always remembers to say it. This is how the passion of an old couple is cultivated. No matter whether you are a man or a woman, no matter how many times you hear it, you will always be very happy when you hear the three words "I love you". You can't usually see long-distance relationships, let alone talk about it. How will he know that you love her if you don't talk about it.

Article 5: Be considerate of yourself in everything, and do what you want others to do first.

Article 6: Maintain a certain frequency of meetings, preferably once every few months. The pain of lovesickness also needs to be released. A few days of sweetness can make up for the lovesickness of the past few months.

Article 7: If two people are aboveboard, it is best to often take the initiative to tell each other what they are doing and where they are. In this way, both parties will have peace of mind. And if you form a habit in this way, the possibility of being poached will be greatly reduced.

Article 8: If you love him, you must trust him. After all, they are in a different place, so it is impossible to see his every word and action every day. Mo Ming's suspicion will ruin the sweetness between the two of them.

Article 9: In everything you do, you must first consider the bottom line to prevent yourself from being caught off guard when encountering sudden changes. Things must always be done in the right direction, but you must be prepared for the bad.

Article 12: Long-distance relationships are most afraid of anger and misunderstanding. If anger and misunderstanding last for a long time, poachers will take advantage of it. Make everything clear, be rational after being emotional, and admit your mistakes when it’s time to do so. Admit your mistake, of course, if no one is willing to bow down, boys please stop giving priority to women at this time, and we should take the initiative where we should.

1. There are indeed some unavoidable practical problems when living apart in two places:

1. The loneliness that cannot be relieved. No matter how fast the Internet speed is, how high the pixels are, and how cheap the phone bill is, it is only a feeling of seeing, hearing, and touching. At the critical moment, when he is not around, the sense of loss can only be felt by lonely people. Both partners have no one to rely on. They are usually busy at work and may not have time to take into account this feeling. However, on weekends and holidays, they often don't want to go home. If you are sick or frustrated at work, the feeling of helplessness will be even stronger.

And being on the road for a long time, placing your feelings on the phone and communicating, and having to face life alone when you need the other person, may make both parties physically and mentally exhausted, thereby aggravating this sense of loneliness.

2. Feelings fade over time, and there are fewer topics to talk about. Lili in Beijing feels more and more that her husband Gao Liang, who is far away in Dubai, is slowly fading out of her life circle. When they met once a year, Lili found that she rarely thought of Gao Liang. The topics she talked about on the phone day after day were nothing more than how her daughter was doing, what happened in the workplace, and the two of them were the same friends. That’s all. The lover becomes the most familiar stranger.

3. It is difficult to get along physically and mentally, and one party may cheat. Sex life is also an integral part of a happy marriage. The long-term separation between husband and wife artificially blocks the satisfaction of instinctive desires, and the inner balance of marriage is broken. And when the lover is not around, once the moral restraint is relaxed, extramarital affairs are very likely to occur.

2. Run towards happiness

When the two places are separated, the difficulty is not the distance in space, but the distance in the heart. How to bring the soul closer to make up for the distance in space?

Don’t hesitate to invest, make frequent calls, and strive to create romance. Be familiar with using QQ and MSN, master the latest network knowledge, and actively share happiness, sweetness, sadness, and concern with your partner, so that the speed of technological development can keep up with changes in relationships. An unexpected love letter, a gift from thousands of choices on an anniversary, a sudden appearance without an agreement, appearing in front of the other person when he needs it most, can make love last forever.

Develop your own hobbies. For example, exercising, shopping, watching movies, traveling, and reading books can, firstly, distract the feelings of missing each other, and secondly, when two people meet, they can also have new topics to talk about.

Use your relatives and friends wisely. When you are in a bad mood, remember to call a friend to talk to you. When you need help, ask your family or neighbors for help. It is better than working alone.

Learn to think differently and have a grateful heart. Most long-distance lovers can bear the pain of missing each other - sometimes it's almost sweet. What they can't bear is the asymmetry in time and space. For example, if you call him in the rain, but no one answers, or you say "hello" and then say: "Call back tomorrow, I'm socializing now!" If you don't get an immediate response to an email, this means Suspicion arose on the side. At this time, you should think more about the other person: Is there something wrong with him? Maybe he is really busy with work. LUCY, who studied alone in Beijing for three years, has always been grateful for this time and has always thought about her husband's kindness. She said: "Except for your parents, no one in the world has a reason to be nice to you. Thinking about it like this, my husband has been so kind to me. , I kept it in my heart, and seeing how cute the other person was, the two people naturally got along much better."

Edit this section on the secret to a successful long-distance relationship

Key words to a long-distance relationship. What wins is not only the passion for the relationship between the two parties, but the most important thing is the belief in the heart, as well as the ability and peace of mind to deal with various situations.

1 Be sure to keep communication smooth with each other

The two people are most afraid of anger and misunderstanding when they are separated. Prolonged anger and misunderstanding will make the relationship between the two people indifferent, and there may even be conflicts. Let the poachers take advantage of the situation, make everything clear, be rational before being emotional, and admit your mistakes when you should. Of course, if no one is willing to bow their heads, boys please stop giving priority to women at this time.

When you get angry, you tell me what specific points he (she) did not do well, and you don’t like this approach. I think if he/she realizes it, he will definitely restrain himself next time, because this is his/her own fault. A woman's needs; but if you say that you no longer have confidence in the love between two people, or say, "I don't care about you, you don't care about me anymore", "I don't know if I will like others", "Who do you think you are?" How did I find you like this?” I think it’s really too much.

Once or twice, these words may still achieve your goal of making your boyfriend angry; but you must know that even if a man feels uncomfortable, even if he will be sad and shed tears, he is most likely suppressing his feelings. He has been disappointed for too many times, and when he turns this disappointment into despair, it really becomes a matter of one sentence whether to break up or not. ——Not his suddenness, but his outburst.

So I advise you who are in a long-distance relationship to know what angry words are and what words that destroy confidence are!

If two people are aboveboard, it is best to take the initiative to tell each other what they are doing and where they are.

In this way, both parties will have peace of mind. And if you form a habit in this way, the possibility of being poached will be greatly reduced.

2 You must trust each other and believe that you can be together.

Before you are separated, you must let your faith and belief support you. Constant confusion and lack of confidence in the future will shake your relationship. Arguments caused by minor conflicts may also become the trigger for breakup.

Love means trust. After all, they are in a different place, so it is impossible to see every word and deed every day. Mo Ming's suspicion will ruin the sweetness between the two of them.

In everything you do, you must first consider the bottom line to prevent yourself from being caught off guard when encountering sudden changes. Things must always be done in the right direction, but you must be prepared for the bad.

Temporary separation will inevitably require two people to wait, but waiting is not scary. The scary thing is not knowing what result you are waiting for.

This is the duty of belief and confidence: think about your woman from time to time to express this confidence and belief, and let her know that although you are not together now, you have been working hard and trying to achieve yourself; Work hard for your happy life in the future.

Only two people who firmly believe in their love can be qualified to talk about anything right or wrong.

So, at any time, no matter who the two people are, they must have this understanding clearly.

When you no longer have any longing for your love, and even have a wait-and-see attitude, it can only be said to be your sorrow.

Of course, if you still think this way now, then stop reading my posts. I despise people with this attitude.

3 Use text messages, phone calls, and the Internet to maintain the most timely contact

Losing contact and being unable to communicate in time will make the other party feel strange, and the timely arrival of text messages, phone calls, and the Internet will make the other party stranger. Virtually experience the feeling of having your lover by your side.

Maintain a certain frequency of meetings, preferably once every few months. The pain of lovesickness also needs to be released. A few days of sweetness can make up for the lovesickness of the past few months.

If you want to call her (or send a text message), then do it. Send her your thoughts in time, which will make your love sweeter; but remember: if you even If you call twice and she doesn’t answer the phone (or just hang up) or the text message goes unanswered, you must have turned from sweet to anxious (even a little angry), but no matter how anxious (angry) you are, don’t call (send) again. Just do your thing with peace of mind (try your best), and she will call you naturally when she sees the phone.

But on the other hand, if your girlfriend calls you (or sends a text message), no matter how inconvenient it is, as long as the phone is by your side, try to at least give her a text message so as not to make her anxious. Don't ask why, because we are men and because we love our girlfriends.

It must be admitted that when anyone wants to call (send text messages) with their lover, they want to get an immediate response; but in a long-distance relationship, you cannot see each other, so you can only treat this invisible barriers are replaced with trust. If she doesn't return your call, it must be inconvenient for her. You have to get used to this idea.

4 Even though the two places are separated, the same passion remains

A short separation is better than a new marriage. The brief reunion after the separation will definitely make the two places have a long love for each other. In addition to the first time, there are also many new things now. Toys can also increase the quality of a long-distance relationship.

In your spare time, do whatever you want to surprise your baby.

This surprise is not all expressed in money, because there are many people like me whose hearts are richer than money.

For example, send a small card online; give her a romantic game to play if you have nothing to do...etc.

Don’t think that these are superfluous and insignificant. You must know that your baby is in a different place. It is inevitable that you will be in love with a man and a woman in front of you. You can’t accompany her at this moment. Do you want to save even these trivial love signals? Have you gone?

Perhaps these things may seem like small actions at the time, but when a person recalls it in the future, its aftertaste is far greater than itself.

Resolutely avoid "Hey, what are you doing? Have you eaten? Is there anything wrong? What, it's okay, then I'll hang up if it's okay...", dizzy, we are two places apart, we can't hold hands, Can't hug, can't solve any practical problems, okay, then let's let our emotions soothe each other, maybe it's a lot of nonsense, but it is these nonsense that make the two of them think about each other, understanding, tolerance, and deep love are all caused by Here it comes!

If either party thinks that they are very busy, do not have much time, and do not have so many topics, then the long-term pain is worse than the short-term pain, so let’s break up!

With twenty-four hours a day, can’t you spare even one hour to spend time with the person you love and who loves you back? I will miss her and think of my heart full of sweetness, I will miss him and think of being in a daze, no need to care about what to say, what matters is the listening, the whispering...

I have always believed that long-distance love is possible Boys and girls are both brave and brave: but in the eyes of family members or pragmatic friends, one is silly and bold, and the other is daydreaming, haha!

But if this world were all pragmatic people, there wouldn’t be so many deep-seated lovesickness, so many lingering pathos, and so many unforgettable stories like water! Liu Yonghui looked at each other with tears in his hands, and Li Qingzhao went up to the west building alone without words!

We are the scenery of love at the station, we are the lovers who cannot be reached on both sides of the phone, we are the protagonists in many stories who can see from afar, we stubbornly hold on to the innocence in our hearts...

Hate is like a chain, love is like running water, we need to contact each other, every day! The only thing that matters is the unknown. This is our biggest enemy!

If you don’t like it, don’t force it. Find someone you love and someone who loves you. This is what long-distance relationships have to be like. You must endure all kinds of pain, but at least you are happy!