Super funny jokes collection

Collection of Super Funny Jokes

1. The cat was forced to sit in the Tuberose hair salon owned by the fox because of the night life. One day, the mouse came to the salon and asked the cat to stay overnight. The cat refused to die. From then on, the mouse said angrily: "I was chased to death at first, but now I'm so serious about sending him to my door!"

2. The doctor asked the patient how he broke the bone. The patient said, I felt there was sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes by holding on to the telephone pole. **A bastard passed by and thought I had been electrocuted, so he picked up the shoe. The wooden stick gave me two sticks!

3. In the biology class, the teacher asked: How can we correctly distinguish the hands and feet of an octopus? Student answer: Let it smell the fart. The one who will cover the nose is the hand, and the others are the feet. The whole class fell down.

4. One person always farts loudly at work, and his colleagues can’t help but say: Can you not make any noise? Then I saw him sitting there shaking. A colleague asked him what he was doing, and he replied: I have set it to vibration now!

5. Someone was riding a bicycle and heard passers-by yelling: go, go, go... I thought, damn, I can also sing: Olai, Olai... before he finished speaking, he fell into the ditch. , a passerby cursed: Damn it! I told you that you are still riding in Gougougou! You deserve to fall to death.

6. Carp and Turtle went to get their marriage certificate. The clerk asked the turtle how old it was, and the turtle said: 100.

The clerk said regretfully: I'm sorry, according to your family's rules, you are not yet a minor and are not allowed to get married.

7. A couple came to a wishing well. The husband bent down and made a wish and then threw a coin into the well. The wife also wanted to make a wish, but when she bent over she accidentally fell into the well. The husband was stunned, then smiled and said to himself: "What a genius!"

8. A couple was fishing by the river. The wife kept quarreling, and after a while the fish was hooked. The lady said: This fish is really pitiful. The husband said: Yes, as long as you shut up, won't it be fine?

9. The science teacher asked: "Why is the body cold after death?" No one answered. The teacher asked again: "Does no one know?" At this time, someone from the back of the classroom said: "That's because the mind is naturally cool when you are calm."

10. The spider loved the ant deeply, but when he expressed his love, he was rejected. Rejected, the spider yelled: "Why? Why is all this happening?" The ant said timidly: "My mother said, those who stay on the Internet all day long are not good people!"

11. Xiaoguang is a A diligent student, he used his winter vacation to work part-time to earn tuition. During the day, he helped a butcher cut meat, and at night he worked as an intern at the hospital. One night, an old woman needed surgery due to emergency, and Xiaoguang pushed her into the operating room. The old woman shouted in panic: "Oh my god! You are the pig killer, where are you going to push me!

12. The men's and women's toilets in the school are connected. A girl forgot to bring toilet paper when she went to the toilet. When I was embarrassed, toilet paper came from the men's room next door. The girl turned pale and asked "Who" loudly. The boy next door replied in a low and powerful voice: "Lei Feng." ”

13. A person wanted to vomit when he first got on the plane. The stewardess took an empty bag, and when it was almost full, she went to get another bag and told “don’t vomit”. When he came back, he saw it all over the place. When he asked why, He replied: "I saw it was almost full, so I took another sip, and everyone around me vomited..."

14. When a woman is 8 years old, you have to make up stories to coax her to sleep. When she is 18, you have to make up stories. Use stories to trick her into sleeping with you. At 28, she will sleep with you without telling you. At 38, she will make up stories to trick you into sleeping with her. At 48, you have to make up stories not to sleep with her.

15. Tiger Reading. After arriving in the Three Kingdoms, I went to catch wild boars. I saw no pigs in the pig nest. I touched my beard and said: Empty City Trick! I turned around and saw a dead pig in the animal trap. I was shocked: Bitter Meat Trick! Suddenly I saw you again. I was overjoyed: Oh, there is also a beauty trap. ?! "I'm not a prince, why do girls always think they should be a princess when they meet me!" 16. One day when Lao Wang was wandering in the city, he suddenly felt a little urgent to urinate. After searching for a long time, he couldn't find a public toilet. He couldn't hold it in anymore and had to find an alley to relieve himself on the spot, but he still had to urinate. The two city management officials came over and asked, "How come you are still defecating in the open even though you are an adult?" Do you have any moral integrity? Fine 50. Lao Wang thought, 50 yuan is enough for me to eat for a month, how can I give it to him? In desperation, Lao Wang said: If someone defecates in the open, it is against the law to take out my own things and look at them.