How to write the winning SMS?

1, I'm really sorry. I'm just chatting with you. It's definitely good to eat donkey meat hot pot in cold weather. I didn't expect you to yell at me angrily: How did my brother offend you? You have to put him in the hot pot cruelly. That's my own brother.

2. I am a lonely tree, standing on the side of the road for thousands of years, waiting alone, just because one day you pass by me, I will fall for you, and it is in vain not to smash you.

3. Forward this message twice, and you will be lucky; Forward it, you will go to the official; Forward it, and you will have good luck; Forward it, and it cost yuan!

One summer night, you got into my mosquito net lightly, touched my arm and kissed my face. You tickle me all over. Turn on the light, take your long legs, damn mosquitoes! I told you to go to hell!

I know you like me, but I really don't like you. Although you have my flesh and blood in your stomach, please stop harassing me, or I will be rude to you, you dead mosquito!

6. There is a tacit understanding, a feeling called wonderful, a longing called longing, and an idiot who will finish reading the message!

7. God knows that you are thirsty and created water; God knew you were hungry, so he created rice. God knows that you have no lovely friends, so he created me; However, God knows that there are no benzene eggs in this world, and he created you by the way.

8. I really miss you. I really want to see you and see you like this, but I really don't want to ... My heart is in a mess-every time I see you, my heart is pounding. The results of the mental hospital examination came out. You are such an idiot!

9. I really want to be with you. Did you sleep well? Are you full? Will it be cold at night? I know you can't take care of yourself. Every time I walk away, you jump out of the pigsty!

10, four little pigs were sitting on the ground, and suddenly one was missing. Piggy is there, looking at a short message.

1 1 Do you really want to know what I like about you? But I really dare not say it, and I have to say it. I just want you to stay away from me.

12, the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing gently, the willows are shaking their branches affectionately, the peach blossoms are smelling charming, and the stream is singing cheerful songs. What I want to say is … Work hard, the boss is coming!

13, what a strange thing? Just dialed your mobile phone, prompting to reply: the other party is streaking. I'm afraid I heard wrong! Dial again At this time, the prompt reply: Sorry, the dialed user has run out of the earth.

14, it's hard to forget the feeling of holding your palm, kissing you, and your unique taste. Let me smoke you harder-cigarettes.

15, I remember I really made up my mind and turned away. Behind me came your helpless crying and heartbreaking crying. Suddenly I feel how much I need you. I turned around and hugged you tightly: I really don't want to sell this pig!

16, I wish I could go to see the sea with you, but I didn't go; I wish I could go hiking with you, but I didn't go because I was at a loss; I wish I could hang out with you, but I met a policeman and he said, "Don't take dogs shopping!" "

17, I heard that you are good at dating. Many beautiful women are fascinated by your romance. Your method is a classic in biosca movies. If it is made into a movie, it is simply Beauty and the Beast!

18, the snow is dancing, the wind is roaring, and you are walking alone under the eaves. The pedestrian was shivering with cold, and suddenly he heard a cry, "Catch the thief, and accidentally missed it. Someone caught him and smashed his head." I hope I am full of energy, so that everyone who reads the information will become a puppy.

19, I've always wanted to say three words to you, but you know its weight. I'm afraid that once I say it, we won't even have to be friends. But I can't control my feelings and summon up courage to say to you: you are a pig.

20, summer weekend, hot summer, scorching sun, I miss you very much. I feel hot and dry when I think of you. I especially want to meet you when it is hot and dry. As soon as I saw you, I couldn't wait to jump into your arms … my dear swimming pool!

2 1, please touch your little red face first, and then touch your little belly! All right! This lecture on pig raising knowledge is over. See you tomorrow!

22. Learning Chinese means sending text messages; Learning mathematics is to count money; Learning English means pretending to be a foreign country; Studying physics is to build an atomic bomb; Learning art means that you can draw like you without looking at the photos of your second brother!

23. It was late at night, and I was walking alone in an alley. Suddenly I felt so lonely, lonely and scared. I miss you eagerly, miss you and look forward to you. If only you were by my side, I really need you-flashlight!

Since I first met you, I have been deeply attracted by you. Your behavior makes me want to look at you again. Now I can't hold it. I want to say to you: you are simply a puppy that can walk on two legs.

Recently, mice love rice, which reminds me of you. You are tender and boneless, and your fragile little body really makes me nervous: Damn Mi Chong! Don't hurt my rice!

26. The moonlight is really beautiful tonight. I really want to walk in the street with you. I really like the feeling of walking side by side with you ... but I'm afraid others will look at me differently. After all, it's easy to be noticed when taking pigs to the streets at night!

27. In my eyes, you have always been carefree, eating so sweetly and sleeping so comfortably. Sometimes I feel: I really envy your puppy life!

28. You are very creative. It is your courage to live. Ugliness is not your intention. God lost his temper and survived. Without you, who will set off the beauty of the world!

29. You and I walked quietly on the path in our hometown. You bowed your head shyly and said nothing. When the villagers saw me, they all said: Good boy, dressed neatly and beautifully, but it's a pity to come out to release pigs at such a young age!

30. The falling rain reminded me of my infinite thoughts. To put it bluntly, I miss you When the weather is fine, I will take you to the green grass, but I made an agreement with you in advance: only grazing is allowed, and no arching is allowed!

3 1. Today is your birthday. Your friend ordered a power train pawn for you. Please take your mobile phone and knock hard on the floor. All right, the song order is over.

32. It is said that you confessed to a woman a while ago and were scolded: Who are you? She's really ungrateful. Only I know that you are different from others. Because your ideal is to bloom chopped green onion first and then fake daffodils!

Starting from tomorrow, the municipal government has decided to eliminate all the mentally retarded young people who are ugly and detrimental to the city! Pack your things and go out for refuge. Don't say I informed you, remember! You're welcome.

I was a pink graffiti pig when I received this message. Delete this information is African Piglet. Reply to this message. It's a wild boar in the wild pig forest. No reply. This is a Rwandan pig. The storage is Ukrainian white pig. It was forwarded by a local tyrant and a stupid pig. Hey, hey, what do you do?

35. Friar Sand said: I changed eighteen times, Bajie said: I changed thirty-six times, and Wukong said: I changed seventy-two times. Tang Priest was furious: I didn't see you change your mobile phone on the way to the west. Look, the monster is still reading text messages on his mobile phone!

36. When you wake up tomorrow, there is a mosquito lying next to your pillow, and there is a suicide note: I struggled all night, but I failed to pierce your face. You are so thick-skinned, I have no face to live in the world, Lord! Please forgive him, I killed myself!

37. God saw that people were thirsty, so he created water and saw the darkness of the world, so he created fire. God knows I need a friend, so you showed up, and God lost a bucket of rice!

There will be a meteor shower tonight. It is said that a pig will fly from the sky. Too bad I want to sleep. You're gonna be okay. So many people watch you fly!

39. Are your ears itchy? Does that mean I miss you and my eyes itch? Does this mean that I want to see you? Does your mouth itch? That means I want to kiss you. Does it itch? That means ... stop joking. You have lice. Take a bath!

40. One day I said to you: You are a pig! But you said to me: I am a pig! From now on, I will call you a pig! That day you couldn't help shouting at everyone: I'm not a pig!

4 1. During the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, you commanded the three armies, wearing a pot cover, carrying a sack, carrying a plastic bag around your waist, holding an egg yolk pie in your hand and carrying two cabbages on your feet. You are called Dong Fangbubai, and you rush to the front and shout: Who has garbage to sell?

42. This message has three main purposes: first, to contact feelings; The second is to pass the time; Third, I tell you responsibly: when summer comes, I send a very technical sentence: remember to wear open-backed pants when the weather is hot.

43. You and I have been playing together since childhood. I can sing 200 songs and you can dance 200 dances. We often perform together, so people call me Brother 200 and ask you to dance 200!

Attention, everyone, quiz: the contestants are elephants, pigs and you. The results of the competition have come out: first, elephants are better than pigs, and you are better than elephants. The final ranking is: you are like a pig. Ok, tell me!

45. After having you, I believe in fate. After having you, I believe that fate is doomed; Maybe all this is pulling you and me in the dark. I really want to say angrily: how much I owe you in my last life!

46, you are so cute-poor, no one loves; You look so good-it's really not your fault that you look like this; You are a genius-a born fool; You are very emotional-stingy and neurotic.

47. It's raining lightly in the sky, which seems to laugh at my delusion. Why are you so selfish and cruel that I miss you? Who knows, I only see pig heads and idiots staring at this poem on their mobile phones.

48. Without the company of flowers, spring will be lonely; If there were no changes in the four seasons, life would be dull; If I hadn't stopped you, you would have been raw; If you weren't beautiful, I would be a vegetarian! Happy holidays, piggy!

49. Do you know? I'm anxious to find you everywhere. I have amazing good news to tell you: your mother asked me to save several hundred million for you, and I'll bring it to you myself! I came to you with money that day and saw you sleeping soundly. I really don't have the heart to wake you up! A litter of pigs is your most beautiful! Ha! Happy holidays, piggy!

50. There are four words I want to say to you when the New Year is coming. Although I am a little embarrassed, this is not the time to be shy. If I don't say it, I will regret it, so I sincerely say to you, bring the red envelope!

5 1, you procrastinate, you procrastinate, the most likely thing is that when others don't exist, they will just bask in the sun all day, not afraid to scare others. Don't think you are handsome, but you are just Marshal Tian Peng!

52. Frankly, I like you very much. Your eyes, the way you walk, the way you are happy, your lovely coquetry and even the way you sleep fascinate me! But what annoys me most is that you don't catch mice, and you always lose your hair.

You are a genius-a born fool, graduated from Harvard-Harbin Buddhist College, and you look good-it's really not your fault that you look like this.

I thought there was something better, but I found it again and again. The best is around, just like you. I didn't think so at first, but as time went on, I realized that you were the best … bully!

55. In the morning, you approached my bed gently and kissed my face affectionately. Your deep eyes have been staring at me, and I really can't refuse you-be a good dog and take you for a walk.

56. I remember that night, you dreamed that you had a pair of wings that you dreamed of flying. I flapped my wings gently, then came to you gently-then kicked you and said, Stop dreaming, idiot!

57, a kind of like plus a kind of infatuation, merged into my fiery love for you; Every bit of life is trivial, and I will rely on you closely; No matter the wind and rain, I will be fearless with you all my life. Really need you, money!

58. You always say that I am worthless. You can't make two farts or shit with a stick because the earth has no gravity, which makes you dissatisfied, but I'm also interested. Come on, put on the ring-K pure iron! ! !

I heard that you have changed recently. You quit smoking, drinking, gambling, sex, greed, boredom, work and love, so everyone calls you Bajie.

60. I have been worried about you every day since I lost contact with you, looking for your whereabouts everywhere. Maybe you don't know how anxious I am, but I won't give up, because-pork prices have gone up, and you have appreciated!

6 1. I was shocked to see that the model of your mobile phone was extremely radioactive on the Internet yesterday. I was just about to inform you that I was relieved to see that people with IQ below didn't work. Don't worry, keep using it.

62. The toad chased the swan, and the swan said disdainfully, if I were like this, I would have died long ago! Toad refused: Is the pig still alive? Hearing this, the pig felt wronged: I provoked whoever I recruited, I was just reading the text message!

63. There is a yearning, a love, a beauty, an agreement and a greeting.

64. I am determined to do a great thing for the people of the whole country: build an elevator for Mount Everest, put up the Great Wall and reverse the plane; Do a little thing: put gloves on flies, put a mask on mosquitoes and feed you some pig feed.

65. Without wind, clouds will not move; Fish can't swim without water; If there is no sun, the moon will have no light; If it weren't for you ... stupid people wouldn't exist.

66. You are as hardworking as a bee, as beautiful as a butterfly, as loyal as a puppy, as smart as a kitten, as simple and honest as an old cow and as fierce as a tiger. No wonder people call you ... an animal!

67. My friend thought a lot last night, and I also thought about it. Only you are the coolest. In my dream, I searched for you for thousands of Baidu. Looking back, you were really thrown in the depths of someone else's donkey shed and tied up, cruel! Cruel! Calm down after reading the information!

68. Is your Mandarin standard? Please repeat after me: look at it, look at it, forget it, look at it. All right, dog, stop barking and eat bones, okay? !

69. The monotonous and busy life day after day sometimes makes people forget their existence. It's easy to find a hammer on your thumb at this time.

70. You are unsmiling, but you love to show off; Although your mouth is not sweet, it is pleasing; You are diligent, but not disgusting; You were born with the ability to watch the door. Look at your wide eyes. This bone is for you.

7 1, the night is already deep. I woke up from a dream. On the grass in the suburbs, when you approached me slowly, my heart was pounding. It all came so suddenly that I shouted at a loss ... Mouse!

72. Guo Hua has been developed into a tourist area, and Tang Priest and his disciples have also married Bai. I sold my golden hoop, because there was no money to eat, and everything was happening. I really miss the days when we studied the classics together, second younger brother. Are you okay?

73. You have a kind heart, and you will selflessly help everyone in the world who needs help. Everyone says that you are an angel from heaven to help others. Unfortunately, your face landed first!

74. One day, a mantis showed off to an ant and said, Look how handsome I am with two knives. The ant was about to speak when a chicken came and ate the mantis in one bite. The ant saw it, shook his head and said, I wonder if it is hitting now? How dare you run around the street with a knife?

75. Do you think I can't find you if you hide? It's no use. No matter where you are, there is always an aura that attracts others' attention. You are not ignorant. It will smell good if you don't take a shower for so long!

76. You always wanted to go back to ancient times and be an emperor. Finally, an expert cast a spell to help you cross back. You are so happy. Look in the mirror. Mom, the expert spell is too powerful. Back in primitive times!

77. I didn't know what love was until I read the story of the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl. I didn't know what it means to be a brother until I read the story of Taoyuan Sanjieyi. I didn't know what a perfect match is until I saw a picture of you and an orangutan!

78. Seeing so many people like you, I secretly encourage myself. I must try to pursue you. When I approached you, I smelled my body, and I finally couldn't help vomiting … stinky tofu!

79. Special news: In the mobile phone endurance contest, the switch will automatically start the timer from the moment, and report the weather forecast continuously. The user who keeps the phone on for the longest time will get free talk time minutes.

80. Dear user, because you confirmed this short message, you are infected with April Fool's Day bacteria. Please look at your palm carefully. If there are black spots, it means that you have been infected by bacteria, and you need to wash them with gasoline to kill them. Remember, remember!

8 1, the wind lifts your long hair, and you look more chic! The waves beat your feet, and you look more innocent! You face the morning glow in the east, just like a spray! It's hard to see that you are a fool if you are not an acquaintance!

82. I can't eat in the morning because I miss you. I can't eat at noon because I miss you more. I can't eat at night because I miss you crazily. I can't sleep at night because I am hungry.

83. It is a gust of wind, but it is so eternal; This is a dream, but it is so real; You bowed your head and said nothing, but I couldn't calm down. Finally, I can't help but say to you: fart first!

84. Without wind, clouds will not move; Fish can't swim without water; If there is no sun, the moon will have no light; If it weren't for you ... stupid people wouldn't exist.

It is said that cats sleep ten hours a day, play by themselves for four hours, stay in a daze for four hours, be teased for four hours, eat and drink for one hour, and read text messages for the last hour. Don't believe it? Look, the cat is reading the short message again.

86. A man told me that you can't eat anything. I gave him a good beating and slandered you like this. I don't know the rest. Don't you and I know? Besides eating, you can at least sleep, run and grind your teeth!

You are like many fish in my heart. You know, I like many fish best. Not only delicious, but also because of you-it's really superfluous! Ha, I'm kidding. I miss you. Call me back!

I seem to see you jump on me happily and stick your head in my arms ... really! I'm so happy. I was just about to give you a birthday cake! Are you so happy? Yeah, I yelled and wagged my tail.

89. Looking at the cloudless sky in Wan Li, listening to the sound of flowing streams, the grass around me swayed gently with the wind. How beautiful nature is! It's a pity that the air is polluted by a fart you just farted!

90. Looking at your thin body day by day, I feel so uncomfortable that I can't eat and sleep. I beg you, don't lose weight again. If you keep losing weight like this, people will think I'm … I'm feeding you lean meat!

9 1, buddy, I went to the show yesterday and found an actor who looks exactly like you, so I asked the staff: Who is the actor who looks like my buddy? The staff said: That's an orangutan bought from Africa.

92. Pig search notice: A purebred white pig has been lost. Features: smart, considerate, holding a mobile phone to read short messages, loving pigs, and returning the information to the owner quickly after reading it! Master misses you now!

93. I've wanted to say three words to you for a long time, but as an ordinary friend, I'm afraid I can't even do it, but I can't help it. I still want to say: borrow some money!

Thank you for accompanying me to see flowers in spring, sunsets in summer, fallen leaves in autumn and snow in winter. Without you, no matter how beautiful the scenery is, I really thank you … glasses!

95. Your figure is always so slim, your skill is always so agile, your life is always very leisurely, you play in the mountains of Mingchuan all day, and the food you eat is pure natural and pollution-free green food. Alas, it's good to be a monkey!

96. You are the sun in my heart, but it is raining. You are the moon in my dream, but it is covered by clouds; You are the most beautiful flower in my heart, but it has already bloomed; You are the Chang 'e in the sky, but your face landed first!

97. When you participated in the ball game that day, you only scored a volley ball. Before the goalkeeper could react, the goal was scored! We all applaud and cheer for you. You get up and pat your ass and say, damn, the ground is too slippery!

98. On your way to xishuangbanna tourism, Yunnan, you were besieged by a group of wild boars. All the passengers took out food and money, but the wild boar was unmoved. You took out your only ID card, and the pigs knelt down and cried: Boss, we found you!

99. You are a playboy and often have fun. There can't be hundreds of millions of money at home. You have been abandoned and looking for prey. You need to ask more questions, but you don't change your mind. You are definitely not a good person.

100, are you working again? I have told you more than once not to work so hard and pay attention to your health. But you always say meaningfully: If you don't roll a few dung balls when it's hot, what will you eat in winter? ;