Joke Collection Website - News headlines - Do prisons and schools have anything in common?

Do prisons and schools have anything in common?

1. Purpose

Prison - come in to receive education, go to jail through compulsory means, and get leave if you perform well;

School - come in to receive education, compulsory education is also compulsory, although there is winter vacation Summer vacation, but it's usually a holiday.

2. Efficacy

Prison - I enter by stealing a wallet, but when I leave, I often learn all the bad things.

School - When you come in, people are basically good-natured, but when you go out, most of them can't find the north, let alone themselves, so everyone is asking: Who am I? Where to go?

3. Meals

Prison - three meals are free, at fixed times;

School - meals are at your own expense, and it is difficult to eat at the right time if not on time: breakfast is usually eaten while walking on the way to school, and lunch and dinner are also often eaten. Dinner was delayed due to procrastination.

4. Relieving yourself

Prisons - have independent toilets;

Schools - using public toilets between classes often lacks time and toilet seats, and girls have to wait in line.

5. Entering and exiting

Prison - a prison guard opens and closes the door for you;

School - you open and close the door yourself.

6. Restrictions

Prison - Relatives and friends are allowed to visit while serving sentence;

School - Relatives and friends are generally not allowed to disturb during classes.

7. Expenses

Prisons - all expenses are paid by taxpayers, and generally no overtime work is required;

Schools - compulsory education is free, non-compulsory education is charged at cost, and overtime and tutoring are usually required .

8. Treatment

Prison - the cell boss may bully you;

School - the teacher will not bully you, but will constantly ask you to practice questions over and over again.

9. Slogan

Prison - a common and eye-catching slogan outside the cell window is: Leniency for confession, strictness for resistance;

School - A common eye-catching slogan outside the classroom window is: Leave the college entrance examination (or high school entrance examination) ) 100 days left...

10. Space

Prison - most of the time you stay in a closed space with a few people - this space is called a cell;

School - most of the time you stay with dozens of people All stay in a closed space - this space is called a classroom.

11. Time

Prison - you have too much free time, you can use it to exercise and keep fit, or even write books like King Wen of Zhou;

School - you don't have With free time, there is basically no time for exercise. Physical education classes are the best way to relax, but they are often canceled. There is not much time for independent thinking, because just remembering the standard answers is enough to keep you busy, and you can have 6 hours a day. The above sleep is happy enough.

12. Management

Prisons - under the management of the judicial department. Your files will be filed with the Provincial Department of Justice, and police cars will be responsible for transporting you before your release;

Schools - under the education department Management, your student status files are filed with the Provincial Department of Education, and your parents are usually responsible for picking up and dropping off. If you are studying in a prestigious school, there may also be a school bus to pick you up.

13. Get out

Prison - you want to get out early, because getting out means freedom;

School - you also want to get out early, although the future is uncertain.

14. Leaving prison

Leaving from prison is divided into three situations: early release for good performance, release after completion of sentence for average performance, and prison escape for leaving quietly without permission;

School— -There are three situations of leaving: those who perform well are called outstanding graduates, those who perform averagely are called on-time graduates, and those who leave voluntarily are called voluntary dropouts, such as Bill Gates.

15. Parting

Prison - It is very touching when parting, usually with tears in my eyes, but I dare not say more, and rush out impatiently to breathe the free air outside;

School—— The scene of parting was very shocking, with people often tearing up books and throwing hats, yelling wildly, and rushing out to breathe the fresh air outside.

16. Ending

Prison - not long after leaving, they find that they can't do anything else. Many people have no choice but to go back to their old ways and continue to commit crimes, changing from first-time offenders to repeat offenders, from suspended death to immediate execution;

School - Not long after leaving, they find that they can't do anything. Many people have no choice but to become addicted to studying and continue to study for further studies, from bachelor's degree to master's degree, from master's degree to doctorate... Of course, some people feel that this process is too long, and sometimes some people climb up and look far away. He became a martyr in one leap. It is said that on the campus of a well-known university, Building A is generally responsible for awarding degrees to martyrs in the sciences, while Building B has become a monument to martyrs in the liberal arts.