Problems and Countermeasures of Interpersonal Relations in University Dormitories: Interpersonal Relations in University Dormitories

Dormitory interpersonal relationship is an important part of college students' interpersonal relationship, and harmonious dormitory interpersonal relationship is conducive to the healthy development of college students' body and mind. However, in recent years, interpersonal problems frequently occur in university dormitories. The following are the articles on interpersonal problems and strategies in university dormitories that I collected for you.

Problems existing in interpersonal relationship in college students' dormitory

(A) dormitory conflicts caused by different living habits

Xiao Zhao, the head of the dormitory, said: Xiao Zhang's hygiene habits in our dormitory are very poor, and our patience with him has reached the limit. Xiao Zhang sweated his feet. He doesn't wash his feet before going to bed every night. His smelly socks were thrown everywhere, and the pungent smell filled the whole dormitory. Clothes don't wash for a long time, and they smell from time to time. I also like smoking and throwing cigarette butts. What makes people even more angry is that we arrange everyone to be on duty for one day to clean the dormitory, but when Xiao Zhang is on duty, he always prevaricates for various reasons. We advised him, sometimes he was silent, and sometimes he said loudly, will you leave me alone? . ? (Zhang, male, sophomore)

College students come from all over the country, with different family environments, different cultural backgrounds, and different living habits and lifestyles. It is inevitable that there will be various contradictions when getting along in the dormitory. If someone snores and talks in their sleep, while others sleep lightly. Some people like watching mobile phones and playing games after lights out, while others like going to bed early. Some people like smoking, drinking and playing cards in the dormitory, while others like quiet. Some people don't pay attention to personal hygiene, and their belongings are still in a mess. Some people like to be clean and orderly. These seemingly trivial things in life are often the fuse of contradictions.

(B) the dormitory contradiction caused by the gap between urban and rural areas

I come from a remote village, and my mother supports me to study alone. I have developed the habit of thrift since I was a child. I never spend money indiscriminately, as long as I can wear clothes and eat enough. I never thought about laptops and smartphones. Several other roommates in my dormitory have superior family conditions. Most of the topics they talked about in the dormitory were what brand of clothes to buy, what brand of cosmetics to buy and so on. I have almost no right to speak and often remain silent. Over time, they became a small group and I became a marginal person. I also want to join their group, but I feel that there is a repulsive force blocking me. Now I'd rather stay in the classroom for a while than go back to the dormitory, where I feel depressed. ? (Xiao Wang, female, freshman)

Family background has a deep influence on a person's character. The personality characteristics of college students with superior family background are often proud, selfish, conceited, possessive, spendthrift and pursuing famous brands. However, there is also a superior side Wei Tongru pointed out that students from cities have better social comprehensive quality than rural students because of their daily activities and extensive contacts [2]. The personality characteristics of college students from rural areas are prone to be suspicious, inferior, self-reliant, determined and stingy. Li's research believes that for some students with poor family conditions, because of their sense of inferiority, they are more negative in daily communication and are prone to loneliness [3]. As the saying goes, birds of a feather flock together, people are divided into groups, different family backgrounds and different values make it difficult for college students to form harmonious interpersonal relationships. Is it easy to form between dormitory members? Small group? Relationship.

(C) dormitory contradictions caused by trivial matters of life

My family condition is not good, my mother is weak and sick, and my father is honest and dull, and he lives by farming. My tuition is still borrowed from my relatives and I owe a lot of foreign debts. After coming to our school, with the help of the class teacher, I found a part-time job in the restaurant, which not only solved the problem of eating, but also earned some pocket money. But a part-time job requires getting up at 5 am and going to the restaurant to make breakfast. When I got up, it was still dark. A little carelessness will make a noise and affect the rest of other students. They were dissatisfied with me and asked me to move out of the dormitory many times. I don't know how to handle this contradiction. I'm depressed. I feel that the dormitory relationship is very cold and there is no warmth. ? (Xiao Li, male, freshman)

There are not a few cases in which interpersonal conflicts in dormitories are stimulated by trivial matters of life. From the murder of my roommate by Ma Jiajue of Yunnan University in 2003 to the poisoning incident of Fudan University in Shanghai on 20 13, similar tragic events occur in colleges and universities every year. In-depth analysis of the root causes of contradictions in college students' dormitories shows that there is no deep hatred between roommates, which all stems from trivial matters. Due to the popularity of computers and mobile phones, many college students have irregular schedules at present. Watching movies, e-books and playing games happen from time to time until midnight, which affects the rest of other students. Moreover, because there are more only children among college students, they have developed a self-centered character, are less concerned about other people's feelings, and lack tolerance and understanding with each other, which leads to dormitory conflicts.

(D) dormitory conflicts caused by different personalities

Han Xiao in our dormitory is the only daughter in the family. She has been spoiled since childhood and has developed a bossy, overbearing, self-centered and selfish nature. In the dormitory, you also have the upper hand everywhere. Everything is better than others. If you are slightly dissatisfied, you will lose your temper in the dormitory and lose your temper. Once she didn't get a scholarship, but her roommate got it, so she ironically said that she asked the class teacher for help. Roommates don't like her, and everyone is far away from her, which leads to disharmony in dormitory relations. (Han provided, female, sophomore)

Just as there are no two identical leaves in the world, there are no two identical people in the world. College students come from all over the country, and everyone's family background, educational experience, regional culture and economic conditions are different, which will inevitably have a certain impact on the interpersonal relationship in university dormitories. The fact shows that because girls are sensitive, delicate and like to talk, there are more exchanges and communication in the dormitory, and there are also many contradictions in the interpersonal relationship in the dormitory, which leads to more complicated interpersonal relationships in the dormitory. But boys are different. When they encounter problems in life or study, they like to bear it alone or hide it in their hearts for a long time, which is easy to break out.

Coping Strategies of Interpersonal Problems in College Students' Dormitories

(A) to improve the interpersonal skills of college students

Marx once said that human nature is not an abstract thing inherent in a single individual, but a reality, which is the sum total of all social relations? [4]。 In other words, as a kind of social existence, people can only become real people through communication with others in social life, and people can't live alone. Good interpersonal skills are a necessary condition for college students' survival and development, and an important guarantee for their study, life and physical and mental health. However, interpersonal skills are not innate and need to be acquired and exercised. By imparting knowledge of interpersonal communication and educating college students to master certain communicative knowledge and skills, it can promote the improvement of college students' interpersonal communication ability. The content of interpersonal communication can be regarded as a special topic in the course of ideological and moral cultivation and basic law. You can also offer elective courses such as interpersonal communication, psychology, communication and cooperation, invite relevant experts to hold lectures on interpersonal communication knowledge, and teach college students appropriate communication methods and skills in view of practical problems in interpersonal communication.

(two) to carry out cultural activities on a regular basis to enhance the cohesion of the dormitory.

Holding cultural activities in dormitory is one of the effective ways to improve the cohesion of dormitory and resolve interpersonal contradictions in dormitory, such as dormitory slogan contest, dormitory photo exhibition and dormitory culture festival. , so as to enhance the feelings and sense of unity and cooperation among dormitory members. These activities not only enrich students' after-school life, but also promote the adhesion between roommates to a greater extent, deepen the understanding between students and cultivate their acceptance and tolerance in the process of cooperation. For example, in the dormitory championship, the selection of topics, data collection, careful design and work display from the beginning all condensed the wisdom and hard work of all dormitory members, showing their intelligence and group advantages. In this process, there will inevitably be differences of opinion. After consultation, debate and brainstorming, we finally formed a view that everyone was satisfied with, which further enhanced the feelings between roommates and eliminated the previous barriers.

(C) to enhance the self-cultivation of college students

Practice has proved that it is easy to form a harmonious interpersonal relationship with people with high cultivation. Then improving college students' self-cultivation is conducive to resolving the contradiction of interpersonal relationship in dormitory and promoting the formation of good interpersonal relationship. One is to improve students' self-cultivation by offering a series of quality education courses in schools. In recent years, our school has made great efforts in quality education, formed a certain system and achieved good results, which is conducive to the improvement of college students' own literacy. The second is through a year's internship. After a year's internship in enterprises and institutions, junior students' self-cultivation will continue to improve and sublimate in the real environment and in communication with various people. Through learning, students should do the following: First, learn to look at the problem from the other side's perspective. If we can put ourselves in each other's shoes and analyze problems, many contradictions will be avoided. The second is to learn to respect others. Dormitory members should respect each other. Only by respecting others can we get their respect. Respecting others means respecting others' living habits, hobbies and lifestyles. The third is understanding and tolerance. Everyone's family background, education level and personality may lead to different results in dealing with problems. Therefore, when encountering differences, we should learn to be tolerant and understanding, don't impose our views on others, and learn to seek common ground while reserving differences. Through study, we can cultivate college students' qualities of respect, understanding, tolerance, trust and cooperation, and promote the establishment of harmonious and friendly dormitory interpersonal relationships.