The differences and connections between modern etiquette and ancient etiquette

Etiquette is etiquette and ceremony.

In ancient China, there was a saying of "Five Rituals". Sacrifice is an auspicious ceremony, wedding ceremony is a graceful ceremony, guest's affairs are a guest ceremony, military affairs are a military ceremony, and funeral affairs are an unlucky ceremony. The content of the Five Rites is quite extensive, ranging from sacrificial rituals that reflect the relationship between man and heaven, earth, ghosts and gods, to social rituals that reflect interpersonal relationships between family, relatives and friends, and between superiors and subordinates; from crowning, wedding, and funeral ceremonies that express the life process. , funeral rites, and the rites of celebration, condolences, condolences, and compensation expressed between people at celebrations, disasters, and funerals, can be said to be all-encompassing, and fully reflect the etiquette spirit of the ancient Chinese nation. Ji Li belongs to the Five Rites. It is mainly a sacrificial ceremony for gods, earth gods, humans and ghosts. Its main content can include three aspects. The first is to offer sacrifices to the gods, that is, to offer sacrifices to God Haotian; to offer sacrifices to the sun, moon and stars; to offer sacrifices to Sizhong, Siming, Wind Master, Rain Master, etc. The second is to offer sacrifices to the earth, that is, to offer sacrifices to Sheji, the Five Emperors, and the Five Mountains; to offer sacrifices to mountains, forests, rivers, and swamps; to offer sacrifices to all things in the four directions, etc. The third is to offer sacrifices to humans and ghosts, mainly for ancestors and kings in spring, summer, autumn and winter. The ominous ceremony is a ceremony of sympathy, condolences, and sorrow. Its main contents include: mourning death with funeral rites, mourning local rites with desert rites, mourning disasters with condolence rites, mourning defeat with juniper rites, and mourning banditry with sympathy rites. Among them, funeral rites are for the death of people with different relationships, expressing different degrees of northward journey through the prescribed time mourning process; famine rites are for the unfortunate experience of famine and epidemic in a certain region or country, and the king and his ministers They all take measures such as reducing meals and stopping entertainment to express sympathy; condolences are a kind of etiquette to express condolences to allies or close friends who have died or suffered fire or water disasters. These three kinds of etiquette can be performed by nobles of all levels. The cypress ceremony means that a country among the allies has been invaded by an enemy country and its urban and rural areas are ruined. The allied country should unite with other countries to raise goods and make up for its losses; the sympathizing ceremony means that when a country suffers from foreign aggression or civil strife, its neighboring countries should provide aid and support. Binli is the etiquette for receiving guests. It mainly includes eight items: court, ancestry, pilgrimage, encounter, meeting, togetherness, questioning, and viewing. Military salutes are the salutes for division and brigade drills and expeditions. Military salutes mainly include the salute of the master, the salute of Dajun, the salute of Datian, the salute of great battle, and the salute of great seal. The Master's Ceremony is a ceremony for military conquests; the Dajun Ceremony is a military review held by the king and princes when dividing land and collecting taxes to appease the people; the Datian Ceremony is the emperor's regular hunting to practice battle formations and review military horses; The ceremony of the Great Battle is a team review when large-scale civil engineering projects such as building cities, palaces, rivers, and embankments are built by the state; the ceremony of the Great Battle is a way of demarcating the boundaries between countries, private fiefs and fiefs, and erecting boundary monuments. Activity. Jiali is an etiquette related to interpersonal relationships, communication and emotional connection. The main contents of Jiali include food and drink etiquette, wedding crown etiquette, guest shooting etiquette, swallow ceremony etiquette, relief flags etiquette, and celebration etiquette.

Folklore circles believe that etiquette includes four life rites: birth, crown, marriage and funeral. In fact, etiquette can be divided into two major categories: politics and life. The political category includes sacrifices to heaven, earth, ancestral temples, sacrifices to ancestors and saints, local drinking ceremonies to honor teachers, meeting ceremonies, military ceremonies, etc. According to Xunzi, the origin of life etiquette has "three roots", namely "the foundation of heaven and earth", "the ancestors are the foundation of humankind", and "the king and teacher are the foundation of governance". Among the etiquettes, funerals were the earliest. For the deceased, the funeral ceremony is to appease their ghosts, while for the living, it is a ritual that distinguishes the elder and the younger, respects the inferior, fulfills filial piety and upholds human ethics. In the process of the establishment and implementation of etiquette, the Chinese patriarchal system was born (see Chinese Patriarchal Law). The essence of etiquette is the way to govern people and is a derivative of the belief in ghosts and gods. People believe that all things are controlled by invisible ghosts and gods, and performing rituals is to please the ghosts and gods for blessings. Therefore, etiquette originated from the belief in ghosts and gods, and is also a special manifestation of the belief in ghosts and gods. The emergence of the "Three Rites" ("Rites", "Book of Rites", and "Zhou Rites") marks the mature stage of the development of etiquette. During the Song Dynasty, etiquette was integrated with feudal ethics and moral teachings, that is, etiquette and etiquette were mixed, and became one of the effective tools for implementing etiquette. Etiquette serves the purpose of persuading virtue, and red tape is used to its fullest extent. It was not until modern times that etiquette was truly reformed. Both the etiquette of the country's political life and the etiquette of people's lives were changed into new content of atheism, thus becoming modern civilized etiquette.

Ancient political etiquette

1. Sacrifice to heaven. The heaven-sacrifice that began in the Zhou Dynasty is also called the Suburban Sacrifice. It is held on the southern outskirts of the capital on the day of the winter solstice. The ancients first paid attention to the worship of entities, and the worship of heaven was also reflected in the worship of the moon and the worship of the stars. All these concrete worships, after reaching a certain amount, were abstracted into the worship of heaven.

People in the Zhou Dynasty worshiped heaven, which developed from the worship of "emperors" in the Yin Dynasty. The supreme ruler was the emperor, and the power of the king was granted by God. Sacrifice to heaven served the supreme ruler. Therefore, the popularity of worshiping heaven did not end until the Qing Dynasty.

2. Sacrifice to the ground. The summer solstice is the day of worshiping the earth, and the etiquette is roughly the same as that of worshiping the sky. In the Han Dynasty, the God of Earth was called Earth Mother, saying that she was the goddess who blessed mankind and was also called the God of Society. The earliest sacrifice to the ground was a blood sacrifice. After the Han Dynasty, the belief in Feng Shui that it was inappropriate to break ground became prevalent. The etiquette of offering sacrifices to the land also includes offering sacrifices to mountains and rivers, to the gods of earth, to the gods of grains, to the gods of crops, and to other things.

3. Sacrifice in the ancestral temple. The ancestral temple system is the product of ancestor worship. The ancestral temple is the residence built by people for the souls of the dead in the mortal world. The emperor's ancestral temple system is seven temples for the emperor, five temples for the princes, three temples for the officials, and one temple for the scholars. Common people are not allowed to build temples. The location of the ancestral temple was that the emperor and the princes were located on the left side of the gate, while the officials slept on the left and right sides of the temple. For common people, there are ancestral shrines next to the kitchen hall in their dormitories. During the sacrifice, divination is also required to select the corpse. The corpse is usually played by the grandchildren. The main deity in the temple is a wooden rectangular parallelepiped, which is placed only for sacrifices. The sacrifices cannot be called by their names. Nine prayers are performed during the sacrifice: "Ji Shou", "Dun Shou", "Empty Shou", "Zhen Shou", "Ji Shou", "Obsession", "Qi Shou", "Praise Prayer" and "Supreme Prayer". Sacrifices in ancestral temples also include sacrifices to previous emperors. According to the "Book of Rites·Quli", all previous emperors who have contributed to the people such as Emperor Ku, Yao, Shun, Yu, Huangdi, King Wen, King Wu, etc. must be sacrificed. Since the Han Dynasty, cemeteries and temples have been built to worship ancestors. Taizu of the Ming Dynasty initiated the establishment of temples for emperors of all dynasties in Kyoto. During the Jiajing period, a temple for emperors of all dynasties was built in Fuchengmen, Beijing, to worship the thirty-six emperors of the past.

4. Sacrifice to the ancestors. After the Han and Wei dynasties, Zhou Gong was regarded as the first sage and Confucius was the first teacher; in the Tang Dynasty, Confucius was regarded as the first sage and Yan Hui was the first teacher. After the Tang and Song Dynasties, the "Shidian" ceremony (a ritual of recommending food and drinks, with music but no corpse) has been used as a learning ceremony and as a ceremony to worship Confucius. During the Southern and Northern Dynasties, memorial ceremonies were held twice a year in the spring and autumn, and temples of Confucius and Yan were also set up in various counties and schools. In the Ming Dynasty, Confucius was called "the most holy teacher". In the Qing Dynasty, there was a Confucius Temple in Shengjing (Shenyang, Liaoning Province). After Beijing was established as the capital, a Confucian Temple was established with the Imperial Academy of the Capital as the Imperial Academy. Confucius called him "the most holy master of literature and propaganda in Dacheng". Qufu's temple system, sacrificial vessels, musical instruments and etiquette are based on Beijing Taixue. The rural drinking ceremony is the product of offering sacrifices to ancestors and saints.

5. Meeting ceremony. When subordinates pay respects to their superiors, they should bow before them. Officials should bow before each other. Dukes, marquises, and consorts should bow twice when meeting each other. The subordinates who live in the west bow first, and the superiors who live in the east respond. When common people meet each other, they salute according to their elders and younger ones. Do four bows when you are outside, and bow when you are near.

6. Military salute. Including conquest, taxation, hunting, construction, etc.

Ancient life etiquette ①Birth ceremony. From a woman's request for a child when she is not pregnant to the baby's first birthday, all rituals revolve around the theme of longevity. The sacrifice of Gaozi is the etiquette of begging for children. At this time, an altar was set up in the southern suburbs, and all the concubines and concubines participated. During the Han and Wei dynasties, there were sacrifices to Gaozi. During the Tang and Song dynasties, the etiquette for the sacrifice of Gaozi was formulated. In the Jin Dynasty, Gaozi was used to worship the Qing Emperor. A wooden square platform was built in the north of Yong'an Gate in the east of the imperial city, with a statue of Gaozi under the platform. . In the Qing Dynasty, there was no Gaoluo sacrifice, but there was a "rope-changing" ceremony with the same meaning. Birth ceremonies have tended to favor boys over girls since ancient times. Birth ceremonies also include "three dynasties", "full moon", "hundred days", "one year old", etc. "Three Chaos" means that a baby receives gifts from all aspects on the third day after his birth. "Full Moon" shaves the fetal hair when the baby is one month old. During the "hundred days", the uncle's recognition ceremony and naming ceremony are performed. The "Zhou Zhou Ceremony" is performed when the child is "one year old" to predict the child's life destiny and good or bad career. ②The coming-of-age ceremony, also called the crowning ceremony, is the crowning ceremony for men who enter the ranks of adults. The crown ceremony evolved from the initiation ceremony that young men and women participated in when they matured, which was popular in clan society. The Han Dynasty followed the Zhou Dynasty's crown ceremony system. During the Wei and Jin Dynasties, Jia Guan began to be accompanied by music. The crown ceremony was practiced in the Tang, Song, Yuan and Ming dynasties, but was abolished in the Qing Dynasty. Many ethnic minority areas in China still retain ancient rites of passage, such as tooth extraction, tooth dyeing, wearing skirts, pants, and hair buns. ③Eating etiquette of eating swallows. The banquet is held in the Imperial Ancestral Temple, where the guests are served with food. The emphasis is on ceremonial interactions rather than food and drink. Yan is a banquet, and the Yan ceremony is held in the palace, where the guests of honor can drink as much as they want. Yanli has a profound influence on the formation of Chinese food culture. Festival banquets form festival food etiquette in Chinese folk food customs. Yuanxiao is eaten on the fifteenth day of the first lunar month, cold rice and cold food are eaten on the Qingming Festival, rice dumplings and realgar wine are served on the Dragon Boat Festival in May, mooncakes on the Mid-Autumn Festival, Laba rice porridge, dumplings on New Year's Eve, etc. are all part of the festival rituals. Eating specific foods on specific festivals is also a dietary etiquette.

The seating arrangements at the banquet, the order in which dishes are served, and the etiquette of inviting and toasting wine all also have requirements on men and women, superiority and inferiority, elder-younger relationships, and taboos in praying and praying in social customs. ④Guest service. It is mainly a courtesy to guests. There are hierarchical differences in gift-giving etiquette when interacting with guests. When a gentleman meets his guest, he will treat the host as a pheasant; when a lower-level official meets, he will treat a goose as a zhi; when an upper-level official meets a senior official, he will treat a lamb as a zhi. ⑤Five sacrifices. Refers to the sacrificial door, household, well, stove, and middle (middle room). In the Zhou Dynasty, households were worshiped in spring, stoves in summer, Zhongliu in June, doors in autumn, and wells in winter. During the Han and Wei dynasties, five sacrifices were performed according to the seasons. In the third month of Mengdong, there was a "La Wu Sacrifice", with a total of one sacrifice. In the Tang, Song and Yuan Dynasties, the theory of "seven sacrifices to the emperor" was adopted, including worshiping Si Ming (little god in the palace), Zhong, Guomen, Guoxing, Taili (wild ghost), Hu, and Zao. During the Ming and Qing dynasties, five sacrifices were still held. After the Kangxi period of the Qing Dynasty, the special sacrifices at the door, door, middle, and well were abandoned. The stove was only worshiped on December 23, in conjunction with the folk legend of the Kitchen God, who spoke to the sky on the 24th of the twelfth lunar month. According to the story, the national sacrificial ceremony adopts the folk form. ⑥ Nuo instrument. It originated in prehistory and became popular in the Shang and Zhou dynasties. The Nuo ritual of the Zhou Dynasty was to expel evil spirits and drive away epidemics throughout the four seasons. Zhou people believed that the movement of nature was closely connected with the good and bad luck of human affairs. The seasons change, cold and heat change, plagues spread, and ghosts take advantage of the situation to cause trouble, so it is necessary to perform Nuo at the right time to drive away evil. The main god in Nuo rituals is Fang Xiangshi. During the Han Dynasty, twelve beasts matching Fang Xiangshi appeared in Nuo rituals. The Wei, Jin, Southern and Northern Dynasties, Sui and Tang Dynasties followed the Han system, and entertainment elements were added to the Nuo rituals. The roles of Fang Xiangshi and the twelve mythical beasts were played by musicians. The Tujia Nuo ceremony in Guizhou that still remains is the most complete and typical.

Etiquette at the dinner table

Dong Wenshen

The culture at the dinner table is the popular name for "drinking culture". In old Beijing, different families or families formed their own unique dining table culture under the influence of society, economy, habits and environment. Many families have "family banquet", "guest banquet" and "convenience banquet" in terms of meals. "Banquet" - Family banquet refers to the banquet held by the family for festivals and various festive activities; guest banquet is a banquet for relatives and friends; casual banquet is a common meal at home. The various etiquettes at the dinner table in old Beijing are very particular. Over the long years, they gradually reflect the values ????of old Beijing. Consciously or unconsciously, they have constructed an etiquette with the contents of "propriety", "filial piety", "morality" and "teaching". Dinner table culture.

"Li" refers to the etiquette and etiquette of eating and drinking. It reflects the etiquette, rituals and personal courtesy requirements formed by the family's moral values ??and customs. Family banquets and casual banquets should be based on "elders" (parents and elders), and guest banquets should be based on "guests". Therefore, many rules have been formed to restrain the family, especially the children.

Etiquette includes formal etiquette and courtesy. Formal etiquette refers to the etiquette reflected in the form and atmosphere of etiquette, such as the choice of banquet venue, the grade of etiquette, the creation of the environment, and the preparation of utensils, all of which must reflect respect for the guests. The etiquette of hospitality refers to the etiquette of entertaining and serving guests. For example, the seating arrangement at a banquet is based on the principle of seniority first, teacher first, and distance first, that is, seating is arranged according to seniority. Tutors who come from afar should be seated first. Relatives and friends should be seated first, and special care should be taken of relatives and friends from poor families. The host should spend longer time communicating with them during the banquet, toast more often, and consciously introduce their "unique skills" such as chess skills to the guests. , calligraphy, and singing skills to gain the admiration and respect of everyone. At the same time, housekeepers and servants are strictly required not to treat these people lightly.

Although each banquet depends on the identity of the guests and the characteristics of etiquette and customs, and there are differences in the type of food, quality level, and choice of restaurant, but the guests must not be allowed to choose "not". Pay attention to etiquette during the whole process of making a toast, toasting, talking, eating, and saying farewell to the banquet.

Before the banquet, the host should introduce the important guests to everyone and give a concise and enthusiastic speech; when the banquet begins, the host should personally pour the wine and toast to the elders and guests in order, and cannot force it; take the initiative to replace the drunkenness. Drink and greet the guests; when serving dishes to the guests, pay attention to the guests' eating preferences, not too many times, and not in large quantities, otherwise it will embarrass the guests; the host should pay attention to the extensive exchanges between the guests, and do not overdo it. Leng Bi, if there is a female guest, you must pay more attention to the content of the conversation and respect for the female guest; the host cannot put down the bowls and chopsticks before the guest, and can not leave the banquet until the guest expresses that he has eaten; the host must accompany the guest of honor, rinse his mouth, and clean his hands Later, we went to another seat to drink tea.

When cooking in a wealthy family, the chef is required to avoid vegetable stains around the plate when serving. He should use both hands to hold the plate and bowl, and his fingers should not be dug into the edge of the plate or bowl; When pouring rice, soup, and tea, it should not be too full. When pouring wine, it should be full, but not overflowing. The movement of pouring tea should be standardized. Do not buckle the lid of the bowl on the table with the spout of the teapot facing the guests. After pouring the tea, take a step back. Turn around and leave; when serving cigarettes to guests, use a plate to serve them. Do not pass cigarettes with your hands. Do not use one match to light cigarettes for several people. Do not blow out matches with your mouth or throw away match stems in front of guests. Do not You are prohibited from sweeping the floor and dusting the table in front of guests, and especially you are not allowed to spill tea on the floor.

In addition, in front of guests, the host cannot reprimand his children or servants; if there is a dispute between the host and the guest's children, the host will take his own child away. No matter who is right or wrong, he must apologize to the other party. But you cannot teach your children in front of guests, otherwise the guests will feel uncomfortable.

Children are generally not allowed to attend banquets. I remember that during family dinners when I was a child, children were required to know the rules, respect others, be polite, and be well-educated. There were three no-nos: no noise, no clinking of bowls and chopsticks, and no hitting the table with chopsticks. Knocking on the bowl, chirping or showing disrespect is not allowed. The second grandmother said that hearing the sound of squeaking while eating was disgusting, and being disrespectful while eating was unbearable. Children who are choking and burping continuously are asked to take the initiative to get off the table. They are not allowed to drag chairs or stools to avoid making harsh noises. This is the requirement to not make any noise. Second, they are not allowed to "mouth". Children cannot move their chopsticks if their elders do not move. Those who pick up the food first are not allowed to fill their mouths full, are not allowed to gobble it up, and are not allowed to stand up to pick up the food. If you can't reach the food, you can signal to the elders to pick it up. You are not allowed to use chopsticks to pick and turn around in the dish. You are not allowed to stare at the dishes on the table while eating, you are not allowed to point at people with chopsticks, you are not allowed to throw or spit out things you don't like or spit them on the ground, you are not allowed to drop rice grains, or uncover the scalp and skin of steamed buns. The rice bowl should be cleaned with leftover rice. The most taboo thing is for children to stick their chopsticks straight into their rice bowls; third, children are absolutely not allowed to drink alcohol. At that time, the two grandmothers liked to have fun with their children, playing games at the dinner table. If they lost, they would have a show. After the meal, they would let the children compete with each other to see whose rice bowl and table were the cleanest. The warm atmosphere at the dinner was very strong. .

"Filial piety" During the family dinner, it is important to respect the elders and fulfill filial piety.

When I was a child, the eldest grandmother and the second grandmother sat at the top. Because the third grandmother was paralyzed, she could not participate, but she had to leave a seat to show her status in the family. When the eldest grandmother said "come and sit down", everyone sat down in order, and the younger children had to eat at another table. Several aunts and my mother could only stand behind the family serving dishes, pouring wine, pouring tea, and handing towels.

The two grandmothers would order their favorite dishes for their daughters-in-law at every family banquet to reward them for their hard work. They called them "reward dishes" at the family banquet. Grandma is both kind and majestic. At the dinner table, everyone should observe the emotions of the two old ladies. When you are in a bad mood, you must act according to the rules. You must make a toast or say a flattering word. You must use words in a proper order, and you must not favor one thing over another, so everyone is very cautious. When they are in a good mood, the two elders also talk and laugh happily, and Lala often praises each other's children. At this time, the eldest grandmother will say: "We are just having fun together, why are we so polite?" Then everyone will relax, the atmosphere will be harmonious and happy, and the adults will lead their children to the main table to say hello to the elderly. The elder sister would please the old man by taking out a few peanuts or candy cubes from her pocket and stuffing them into the old man's hands. The two elders were so happy that they couldn't help but praise their granddaughter. The second grandmother is more casual. She will go to the children's table to tease the children, and even let the children put some food into her mouth. The children are also very happy. Everyone is enjoying family happiness in a lively and harmonious atmosphere.

This kind of "filial piety" is not only the respect and respect of the younger generation for the elders, but also reflects the care and concern of the elders for the younger generation. Therefore, the younger generation respects and is more filial to their elders, creating a sincere filial piety in everyone's heart.

"Virtue" is a kind of conduct, and there are requirements of "concession, moderation and frugality" in the family's food and drinks.

"Give" means to ask everyone to be humble to each other, not to rush to eat the delicious food, but to let others eat first. Even if they are all eaten, there should be no resentment, and to give first; "degree" It is required to drink and eat in moderation and not to overeat, let alone to encourage people to drink excessively and make people drunk. "Frugality" means being frugal and not wasting food, especially children. The two grandmothers often told them not to be extravagant or extravagant when hosting banquets.

After the banquet is over, untouched chopsticks and unserved dishes must be taken home.

"Teaching" refers to family education in food and drink. Through oral and personal teachings, the old rules and customs in the family have been inherited subtly. When dining with the family teacher ***, my grandmother always asked several teachers to "teach the children" and made suggestions to the children according to social fashion. New requirements, when you see bad things, give them some pointers, let the children know what to do and what not to do, and educate them through eating.

Under the influence of etiquette, filial piety, morality, and education, children have developed better eating habits, and then formed a dining table culture that emphasizes etiquette on form, filial piety on psychology, morality on behavior, and education on inheritance. , and these are also a microcosm of old Beijing culture.

Campus Etiquette

When it comes to caring for public property, some people may think that this is a cliché, because it is similar to "It is glorious to protect public property, and it is shameful to destroy public property" and "Everyone has the responsibility to protect public property." "I'm afraid even kindergarten children can say a few slogans like this.

But what do we do in real life? If you observe carefully, you will find that vandalism of public property abounds on campus: some students trample on the lawn in order to take a shortcut; they accidentally break the doors and windows of the classroom while playing football; they damage the public buildings on campus during outdoor sports. **Tables, chairs, railings and trash cans; all kinds of graffiti are often seen on desks and chairs... Have you ever thought that, whether intentionally or unintentionally, these behaviors cause damage to public property and also cause damage to other students? It brings unnecessary trouble to students' study and life, and also increases the school's maintenance costs for public properties, which is a big expense.

Yes, what these people lack is "public morality". They do not pay attention to social ethics and do not abide by rules and disciplines. They have never realized that they are also the "owners" of these public properties. They do not know that public properties are shared by everyone and everyone has the obligation to care for them.

"If a person has no virtue, he will not be established, and if a country has no virtue, he will not prosper." The quality of citizens' morality reflects the mental state of a nation and affects the rise and fall of a nation's cause. A person's words and deeds often reflect the level of personal quality, which in turn affects the overall quality of the entire group. Whether a citizen cares about public facilities or not can reflect the level of a person's moral quality and the quality of a school's school spirit from a small perspective; it also reflects the level of a country's civilization and national quality from a large perspective. The "Implementation Outline for the Construction of Citizen Morality" promulgated by our country proposes social ethics with the main content of "being civilized and polite, helping others, caring for public property, protecting the environment, and abiding by laws and regulations." As citizens of the People's Republic of China, we should all regulate our behavior according to this requirement.

The ancients said: "Don't do good deeds because they are small, and do not do evil because they are small." In fact, it is very simple to protect public property. As long as you have a heart of public morality and abide by the school's rules everywhere These rules and regulations can ensure the integrity and normal use of public facilities