The custom of Chaoshan people getting married

The wedding custom in Chaoshan is almost as effective as the six ancient rites: Chaoshan is commonly known as Nacai's proposal, marriage requisition or matching eight characters, Naji's engagement or engagement, which is called sending an engagement and choosing an auspicious day for an invitation party.

Propose marriage

Propose, also known as propose. That is, the matchmaker proposes to the man, or the matchmaker introduces the woman to the man first, and then proposes to the woman after the man approves.

Hexagram

Traditional marriage has two links. After the two sides propose marriage, the matchmaker writes the woman's name, date of birth, place of origin and ancestors into three generations and sends them to the man. If nothing unexpected or unlucky happens in the man's house within three days, such as breaking bowls and pots, it is called "three days". With this good sign, the man agrees to exchange Geng posts. Please get married separately after changing the Geng post to make sure that both men and women are born together or contain each other. If we contain each other, the marriage will have to be ruined.

Contemporary people advocate free love. Although young men and women have long got rid of the marriage custom of "parents' orders and matchmakers' words" and the old custom of exchanging Geng posts has been abandoned, many people still keep the link of "matching eight characters"

be engaged in

After choosing an auspicious day according to the eight characters, you enter the engagement stage, that is, the man prepares a gift for the woman to get engaged, which is also called "fixing". Gifts are generally gold and silver jewelry such as gold earrings, gold rings and gold necklaces, as well as tokens of love such as sugar and noodles. This woman deserves a gift in return. Both men and women should distribute candy and cakes to relatives and neighbors to inform them that their marriage is fixed.

Send job information

After the engagement, you have to pay the bride price. Hire, also known as rent. In the past, the bride price of rich people was gold and silver, colored satin, pigs and sheep, wine and fruit; The poor are betel nuts and chicken wine. Chaozhou people regards betel nut as a symbol of good luck and a distinctive employment gift.

Contemporary bride price includes physical objects and cash, and there must be more than four kinds of physical objects: sugar, noodles, Daji (Chaozhou orange), gold and silver jewelry, clothes and cloth, cakes and foods, etc. , but they cannot be odd numbers, but must be even numbers. Cash, also called bride price money, is divided into one, two and four, but they are all multiples. During the engagement, the woman should return the cake and food during the engagement, and give back mandarin ducks, bananas, oranges, pig hearts and so on. Yuanyang and banana are coexisting bananas, symbolizing centenary, and also meaning to make money into treasure; The orange homonym "Ji" symbolizes good luck; The pig's heart (half left in the woman's body) symbolizes concentricity. At this time, the two sides will also solemnly distribute the cakes and food in each other's gifts to relatives and friends to report good news, and relatives and friends will also return gifts to congratulate them. Giving a gift to the bride is called "sending pollen".

Choose an auspicious day

Pick another day. After the engagement ceremony, the man should choose the wedding date and tell the woman, including telling her when to cut the wedding dress, when to "pull her face" (that is, twist the hair off her face with a thread), when to take a shower and when to get married. Most of the time chosen by chaozhou people is in the middle of the night, and it is an ancient legacy for hipsters to keep the custom of getting married late at night. In ancient times, weddings always ended in fainting, so wedding ceremonies must be held after dusk or even late at night.

Pick up the bride (in a sedan chair) for the wedding.

The wedding ceremony is the ceremony for the groom to marry the bride at the woman's house, and it is also the most important procedure in the wedding. There are two kinds of old-fashioned weddings: one is the groom's wedding, and the other is that the man invites a "lucky dog" to meet him. In modern times, most of them are the groom himself. During the whole process before and after the wedding, both the woman and the man will hold some custom activities, including the following aspects:

Flower washing water

Before marriage, the bride should bathe in water with twelve kinds of flowers and plants, such as Cao Xian and pomegranate, and put on a "five elements" coat after bathing, also known as a "sedan chair shirt", which symbolizes the perfection of Five Blessingg. In some places, the bride should sit in the bathtub and eat two boiled eggs after taking a bath, praying for a smooth birth after marriage. Moreover, the clothes worn by the bride can't be sewn inside and outside, which is intended not to take away the luck of their parents.

Fenfenmi

Before the wedding, the bride wants to "divide the rice", that is, give a lot of rice mixed with coins to her brothers and sisters at home, indicating that she will share her wealth with everyone. In Haishan Town, Raoping, the custom of dividing rice is that the mother puts the rice in a dustpan or bamboo sieve, shakes the dustpan vigorously and says, "After the dustpan is round, the children and grandchildren will make a fortune; Even, hold a male grandson next year. " Then give the money and rice to the bride's brother and one to the bride. The bride took it and put it in a special Chinese-style belly pocket, and put the money and rice in her husband's rice jar.

Eat half a bowl of rice

In the morning before the bride goes out, the bride's family will cook a four-course or nine-course breakfast for the bride to enjoy. Among them, there must be four ordinary dishes, such as boiled fat intestines, pork bellies, stewed dishes and good dishes. The bride should eat enough rice, but the bride can only eat one side (that is, half a bowl), which means that she should leave money for her family after marriage.

Anchuang

Before the wedding ceremony, the groom should hold a solemn ceremony of "fixing the bed" when decorating the new house. To choose an auspicious day to make a bed, the orientation of the head of the bed is also particular. After putting the bed on the bed, put a note on the bed saying "Good luck in bed" and "Here comes Kirin", and then ask a boy to lie in bed for a while, indicating that he wants to have a baby early.

Pick up the bride

On the wedding day, the groom goes to the bride's house and picks her up by bike, motorcycle or car. The bridesmaid and uncle (the bride's brother) accompanied her. Aunt is going to take a gift to the man's house. In addition to the male hen, this gift also needs a bottle of lamp oil, which means that the man "adds rdquo". Now, some people use makeup oil instead of lamp oil. Brother-in-law will be warmly received when he visits his in-laws' home.

When getting married, the bride should bring a dowry. There should be lamps, clogs, needle and thread, mirror, comb, ruler, rice tube, grass-headed Chinese-style chest covering (there are two grass-headed incense, that is, sedge) in the dowry. There are toys and stationery for children and socks for relatives and friends. Among them, clogs mean "grow old together" or "imitate"; Wearing a comb symbolizes that the bride combs her hair in an orderly way. Now some children use small quilts to fold into a Chinese-style corset, and grass heads are sandwiched in the quilt to form a Chinese-style corset with grass heads.

Eat "five bowls of bread" and "a round house"

After entering the bridal chamber, the bride should eat "five bowls": saury, pork liver boiled onion, leek fried pork, meatballs, sweet bowls-glutinous rice or taro paste. Put four sweet cups on the four corners of the table, put brown sugar in the cups, and stick a little brown sugar on each dish, which is sweet from beginning to end. The dragon swordfish symbolizes competence, the boiled pork liver with green onion symbolizes being an official, intelligent and reasonable, the leek symbolizes long life and quick hair, the meatballs symbolize reunion, and the sweet bowl takes the sweetness of life, all of which are good wishes for good luck. The bride and groom should sit at the two ends of the bed and eat the "closed door", that is, eat glutinous rice balls and exchange the rest after eating half.

Jingtiancha

At noon on the wedding day, the man feted relatives and friends. After the luncheon, the mother-in-law or groom will take the bride out and offer sweet tea or betel nut to relatives and friends. Tea should be served in strict accordance with the order of generations, and the mother-in-law or groom should teach the bride one by one: Who is this and what is it called? When an elder drinks a cup of happy tea, he will give back a red envelope, commonly known as "face money" and some words of blessing.

On the wedding day, the neighbors talked and laughed, came to eat candy and came to see the bride. The bride wants to send the toy back to Cuo.

On the third day of marriage, the bride and groom will hold a "return gift", that is, go back to their parents' home. The ceremony of returning the door was held three times in a row, commonly known as "returning the door for the first time", "returning the door for the second time" and "returning the door for the third time". The first two times, the bride and groom need to have lunch at their parents' home, but they have to return before cooking dinner. Only for the third time can you spend the night at your mother's house. In some places, a "return ceremony" is held after four months of marriage.