What if the mother-in-law always speaks ill of her daughter-in-law behind her back?

First, the mother-in-law said that the daughter-in-law was not good. 1. Speak ill of people behind their backs. Everyone must have a deep understanding. Maybe it's yourself, or a friend, there is always a time to discuss a person's bad. However, in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, this kind of behavior of speaking ill of others behind their backs may be that mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will be more. 2. It is not difficult to understand that the mother-in-law is not calling for women's self-improvement, and women should be an independent generation. More mothers-in-law take care of their husbands and children after marriage, do housework and form a short-term family with the women in the neighborhood. Even if her mother-in-law speaks ill of herself behind her back, she can hold back her complaints and do her own thing. Remembering this is more important than anything else. Compared with the mother-in-law who speaks ill everywhere, everyone can see her kindness. No one likes a person who speaks ill everywhere. Didn't you see the result? When mother-in-law speaks ill of herself everywhere, don't forgive her and don't speak ill of her. Doing your own thing with peace of mind will make everyone understand that what she said is nothing more than showing the heart of a villain and patting the belly of a gentleman. We don't have to care. 5. Do the etiquette you should do and the filial piety you can see. If mother-in-law still doesn't like herself, let her be angry. Everyone has a young age and an old age. The young are not filial to the old, and the old do not bully the young. After all, everything is going well at home. Second, the mother-in-law speaks ill of her daughter-in-law. 1. The contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually a secret competition between two women and a' collision' between two lifestyles. It is normal for a mother-in-law to speak ill of her daughter-in-law, and it is understandable for her to speak ill of her daughter-in-law. The root of the contradiction is actually two women fighting for a man. 2. A woman is unwilling to raise her child to another woman. Another woman hates her husband hiding her mother in her heart. Therefore, seeing each other is not pleasing to the eye. A stranger suddenly joined a family of his birth, and his lifestyle and habits were different. Then, just as water drops fall into the oil pan, oil will splash everywhere. 3. The mother-in-law speaks ill of her daughter-in-law behind her back, and the clever daughter-in-law pretends not to know. Then introspect, is it really like my mother-in-law said that she is not doing well? If you don't do well, you must change it. Correct according to the direction pointed out by her mother-in-law As we all know, the older generation is generally less educated, knowledgeable and narrow-minded than the young people today. Then they will look at things in different ways. And this is normal for young people. Therefore, you can only fight against the older generation. Tell your mother-in-law privately that you know this, and you feel uncomfortable. I hope she won't gossip about her parents outside in the future. If the mother-in-law accepts your suggestion, the problem will be solved. If the heart is really uncomfortable, communication is invalid. Then I said to myself: she is my husband's mother and my mother, and I want to accept it. This will make me feel much more comfortable. What if the mother-in-law always speaks ill of her daughter-in-law? 2 0 1 can the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law really be "as close as mother and daughter"? Papi sauce expresses her mother-in-law's point of view. Her mother-in-law can treat her daughter-in-law as a daughter, but her daughter-in-law can't treat her mother-in-law as a mother. During Choo Ja Hyun's marriage, her in-laws regarded her as their daughter, which caused jealousy. In real life, there is indeed a mother-in-law relationship as close as mother and daughter. But the root cause is that the son values his daughter-in-law more, and the mother cares about her daughter-in-law because she cares about her son's opinion and doesn't want to lose his love. Or the wife especially cares about her husband, doesn't want to lose his love, and has a strong will to have a good relationship with her mother-in-law. But the disadvantage of doing so is that it will strengthen the color of the third party in the relationship between husband and wife. In the long run, the three are the * * * relationship. So, can a daughter-in-law treat her mother-in-law as her own mother? When getting married, both parents often say "I have a son and a daughter", and the change of address will make people have the same illusion as their mother-in-law. In fact, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are always different. The problem with many mother-in-law relationships is that the daughter-in-law holds the expectation that "mother-in-law is her own mother", and under the premise of wrong positioning, she can't help comparing her mother-in-law with her mother-in-law, or comparing her mother-in-law's attitude towards her husband with her attitude towards herself. Finally, she was inevitably disappointed. Then how to correctly position in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? 1, recognize the role of daughter-in-law, the relationship between mother-in-law and mother-in-law, and the relationship between husband and wife is a subsystem of the whole family system. In the parent-child relationship, you are the mother, in the husband-wife relationship, you are the wife, and in the mother-in-law relationship, you are the daughter-in-law. Playing the role of a good daughter-in-law is the main theme of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Harmonious relationship needs management, and the premise of management is accurate positioning in the relationship. 2. Establish an appropriate psychological boundary. You are an independent individual with independent abilities and thoughts. Everyone has a corresponding ranking and positioning in your life. If you can't love each other, you can at least maintain respect, care and due responsibility and obligation for each other at a suitable distance. What role should men play in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? Many people have mentioned that the man is the most important in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and his handling method directly determines the direction of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Some people say that the husband has "Oedipus complex", which leads to the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Psychologically, Oedipus complex refers to a man who is alienated from his mother. In the serious conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, this man does not have Oedipus complex, but hates his mother. In the process of growing up, my mother's strength suppressed many inner emotions, so that I subconsciously alienated my mother. Therefore, I can't help but find a woman who can suppress my mother and complete the previous "confrontation desire". However, because children naturally love their mothers, they love and hate them. Some husbands will let their wives be kind to their mothers, but they are alienated from their mothers. This is because of the contradiction between love and hate in their hearts. In fact, Oedipus complex or hate mother complex is the result of spiritual entanglement and incomplete separation from mother. Therefore, when choosing a partner, try to choose an independent and complete man as a partner, which can avoid many conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Then, if you are married, the husband must understand that the relationship between husband and wife is the core relationship in the family. This refers not only to the husband-wife relationship between daughter-in-law and son, but also to the husband-wife relationship between father-in-law and mother-in-law. Therefore, we should put the relationship between husband and wife first and form an alliance with our wife. Maybe at the beginning, my mother-in-law will be disappointed and feel that she has lost her son, but in the long run, it is beneficial to health, because her partner is a father-in-law, and only when she has a harmonious relationship with her partner can she be truly happy, instead of pinning her feelings on her son. The so-called fish begins to stink at the head, only at the source, the relationship between husband and wife is harmonious and happy, and the relationship between husband and wife in a small family will be happier. Do you want to live with your in-laws after marriage? To operate a healthy relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the daughter-in-law should correctly position herself, get rid of unreasonable expectations, establish appropriate psychological boundaries, and the husband should psychologically "wean", put the relationship between husband and wife first, and establish an alliance relationship with his wife. So, do you want to live with your in-laws after you get married? Quite a few contradictions arise from living with in-laws. Because people of different ages have certain differences in lifestyle, eating and sleeping habits. The building of quadrangles is actually very scientific. Every family is an independent individual, but at the same time it is a whole, which not only preserves private space, but also facilitates mutual care. In modern times, you can also refer to this model, try to keep the private space of a small family and keep a proper distance from your parents. For example, they all live in the same community with a certain distance, but it is convenient to take care of each other. Under special circumstances, after giving birth, my in-laws will take care of my daughter-in-law and help with the children. At this time, often on the basis of cohabitation, coupled with children's education problems, leading to many conflicts. Young couples will think their education is more scientific, while old people will think they are more experienced. This requires both husband and wife to patiently synthesize the suggestions of all parties, rather than listening to any party, and try to seek common ground while reserving differences through communication and coordination. To put it simply, if you can, keep a proper distance. If you live together, you must integrate different needs in many aspects. Family relationship needs the management and efforts of parents-in-law, wife and husband. Everyone can find his own position and determine the order of relations, so that the family can maintain a harmonious state. Instead of continuing to let the question "I fell into the water with your mother at the same time, who will you save first" be passed down from generation to generation. What if the mother-in-law always speaks ill of her daughter-in-law? How to resolve the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Many women always think that the man who marries them is their own, just as a man becomes a man after marrying himself. So men are not allowed to be too kind to their parents. If a man is good to his parents, he will be bad to himself. Fighting for love with her mother-in-law everywhere can easily cause her jealousy. Although the mother-in-law also wants her son and daughter-in-law to be kind and loving, it is unacceptable for any mother if her daughter-in-law takes away her son and her feelings. 2. A woman who is particularly critical of men. Any man is the work of his mother. A mother can say that her son is not good, but if others say it, especially her daughter-in-law, the mother will generally not accept it. Some women look docile and virtuous before they get married. However, after marriage, I seem to be a different person. I find fault with men and feel that men are everywhere, which makes men very uncomfortable. Such a woman will certainly attract strong opposition from her mother-in-law. First, my mother-in-law thinks that her daughter-in-law is fake, and she has changed too much before and after marriage, which seems to be a little derailed. Second, she thinks that her daughter-in-law doesn't love her son at all, and even dotes on her son. This is an emotional defense war. Generally speaking, the daughter-in-law is the loser in this defense war, because for men, there is only one mother, and the daughter-in-law can marry at will. 3. Women who don't like housework. Some women don't like housework by nature, so men become domestic servants. Men not only have to run for their families, but also have to do laundry and cook when they get home. Such a woman can easily attract the opposition of her mother-in-law. There is not a mother who doesn't care about her son. If the son lives like a servant after marriage, the mother will definitely not agree. 4. Women who bully men. Some women are born with a bad temper and lose their temper easily, as if men were their punching bag. Marriage itself is equality and love between men and women. If there is inequality in marriage, especially if your son is bullied by his daughter-in-law, the mother must take care of it. There is no doubt that a daughter-in-law bullying her son is like digging her mother's heart, and no mother can stand it. 5. A woman with a great contrast with her mother-in-law. Before marriage, in order to marry a daughter-in-law, her mother-in-law often tolerated her daughter-in-law's temper or personality. However, once a woman becomes a daughter-in-law, some mother-in-law will not tolerate her shortcomings. In particular, some mother-in-law have a strong personality, and they can never tolerate the wrong performance of their daughter-in-law, and even severely reprimand them. Coupled with their young daughter-in-law and big temper, it is easy to reflect the fierce contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.