Why do some people dare not be willful, lose their temper and feel inferior?

Because they think of themselves as light as reeds in their hearts, they are not sure of their weight in others' hearts at all, and care too much about others' feelings and evaluations. Even if one thing has nothing to do with them, they will naturally wonder if they have done something wrong.

That's because they guess that they don't have willful "capital", and most of this source comes from families. The formation of children's character has a great relationship with family education. In fact, everyone's nature is natural and casual, but it will change with age. Scene simulation:

For example, A clamored for a toy, but his parents satisfied him and gave him a willfulness. He knew he was spoiled. In the long run, maybe he won't hide anything in his personality, because he will feel that others will also accommodate him. However, if B wants toys, his parents refuse to buy them on the grounds that he has no spare money and won't turn around, hoping that he will be obedient and sensible. In fact, this child will gradually become "someone else's child", dare not ask or hope, just ask for "praise" from his parents.

This is a problem that needs to be viewed in combination with reality. The hot topic once was why the younger generation is so free and easy, while the middle-aged people seem to be unable to take a step. A typical example is that if you are unhappy in a company, most young people will choose to leave, while more middle-aged people will choose to put up with it. Because they need to consider whether their current state can bear the consequences of venting their emotions. The other questions are the same. When we lose our temper, we always consider the object of anger. Is it anyone who can refute it? Similarly, if the real problems are ruled out, then such people who have reasonable space to vent their emotions choose to escape, which is probably caused by strict family education.

In fact, this inferiority complex will be discovered gradually after you have a certain ability to remember things. For example, when you were a child, someone else had a new toy box, but you didn't. At that time, you will only feel unhappy, but there are many such situations, piling up like mountains, and when you grow up, you will find that you have formed an inferiority complex. Because no one is perfect, even if someone is outstanding in appearance, his grades can't catch up with others, and vice versa. Therefore, inferiority is almost everyone's normal state, because no one is perfect, but just because they always compare their own shortcomings with the advantages of others, they naturally feel inferior.

It seems that the subject didn't quite understand this mentality when asking this question. In a sense, you are lucky. I was born to be useful. I hope everyone can overcome their inferiority complex and vent their emotions reasonably. Satisfied friends can give me a compliment or pay attention to me.

Dare not be willful, dare not lose your temper, not feel inferior, but be sensible.

Imagine, in a family, in a group, there will be willful desperation, whether it is worthwhile to lose your temper and feel that you are awesome, and others will let TA go.

And some people, never willful, will endure. They are definitely not inferior, nor are they temperamental, but sensible. It is not good for a person to know how to be willful and lose his temper. How can you say that not being willful and not losing your temper is inferiority?

This is exactly what makes a person valuable.

If everyone loses their temper willfully, imagine this home, or is it home? Can this society be stable?

It's not that I don't lose my temper, nor dare to be willful, nor is it inferiority, but the best virtue of this person.

People who dare not be willful, lose their temper or feel inferior are self-aware and know how heavy they are. People who have no power, potential or money can only bear it, and never lose their temper willfully. Otherwise, it will pay a huge price. People with power and wealth are not afraid of willfulness or losing their temper. Because they have strong backing. You can't keep up with the competition and conform to the environment, so you will be healthy and harmonious.

Because people are walking, they dare not be willful. There are fewer people who tolerate us. There are more people blaming us. No one is protecting us. Here comes our critics. We are becoming more and more mature. Therefore, we look down on many things in life, dare not be willful, afraid of losing, and afraid of losing our temper. I suggest you not be too patient. Usually, you can vent your bad emotions in time through sports chat and singing, and don't give yourself too much pressure. Also, inferiority mainly comes from your inner self-distrust. Maybe you have experienced some stressful things in your life, or some minor setbacks, which caused you to lose your courage and confidence. You should get in touch with others more, don't shut yourself in your room, you should take an active part in group activities.

Personally, I think it has something to do with my childhood living environment and family.

Let's talk about me first Parents of rural people in poor counties go to other places to work several times a year. Later, my parents couldn't bear to take our two brothers to the big city. Everything seemed very novel at that time. Instead of clamoring for parents to buy things, I feel very hard. It is difficult for every family to get out of the countryside for money, so parents quarrel constantly in life, which actually has a great influence on children. Some of them are introverted and self-abased, but others become rebellious. Both of them have one thing in common, leaving this home where they quarrel every day.

After graduating from junior high school, I went out to work with my parents. My first job was a long night shift. It's really hard. No socializing, no entertainment. I just went to work and went to bed after work one day, so this is also the main reason for my inferiority. Why is it the main reason for my inferiority complex? Later, I ended my first job and started a new one. I started to have an entertainment circle. Under the guidance of my friends, I realized that I thought I could actually afford expensive things. In the past, I didn't dare to go into a decorated shop whether I was eating or buying clothes. I've always been afraid of being humiliated when I go in. Now think about it, no matter how big the mall is, there are bargains you can afford.

As for willfulness, I think it is either rich or heartless. If you have money, your inferiority complex may have nothing to do with you. Why do you say you are cruel and heartless? You dare to be willful. If you are a stranger, you will definitely slap. For the parents around you, you have repeatedly asked to wipe your ass after you finish. Don't you think it's cruel? Besides, people who dare not lose their temper have no money, no money or no money [tears]

In the final analysis, in today's society, if you have enough money, you can be willful and lose your temper without feeling inferior [cool] [cool].

Hello, I'm Lao Yang.

People can keep a low profile, but they cannot feel inferior.

Low-key represents our principle of doing things, avoiding its sharpness, seeking advantages and avoiding disadvantages.

Inferiority is not low-key, but self-contempt, which is an emotional experience produced by comparing with others.

Life is a complete process, and now I can't live without my former self.

I often feel inferior now. When I was a child, my mother often asked me to compare with others:

Before going to school: let me be more sensible than the children who live next door;

Going to school: let me compare with the top students in my class;

Graduation: Let me compare with other people's work and career.

Now that she is old, she doesn't care much about me. However, I am getting more and more tired, more tired than others, more tired than work, more tired than wealth, more tired than cars and more tired than houses. For example, when Mount Tai topped the list, I only saw people who were better than myself.

I still remember when I was at school, I even chose to submit to humiliation. I say it's good to put up with it, and it's timid to say it's ugly.

There are two kinds of people who can bear it. One is to have great wisdom, and the other is to be careless if you can't bear it. The rest is cowardice.

Fortunately, I learned to write and read in my thirties, and now I have enough knowledge to analyze my former self. Now I am more and more confident and sunny.

Adler's classic book "Inferiority and Transcendence" says that if you want to get rid of inferiority, you must learn to find superiority and improve yourself. Observe the world around you, always look at it from another angle, and you will gradually find confidence.

Because of sharing, it is stronger.

Maybe you come into contact with someone, and at first you think he is very polite and considerate of others. Gradually, you feel like something is wrong. It seems that this person will always have a good temper, nothing will happen, and he will always smile. Sometimes, it is clear that one's rights and interests have been violated. People say he is a good man and always suffers indignities. You think so, too. Later, you think he is not unhappy, but afraid of being angry and being denied by others. Why do some people dare not be willful, lose their temper and feel inferior? Li Wei, a psychological counselor, came to talk to you.

Is it necessary for a person to feel inferior if he dare not be willful or lose his temper? Conversely, if a person dares to be willful and lose his temper, must he be confident? Not exactly.

Suppose there is such a person, in the process of contact and communication with others, who is not happy at all and begins to lose his temper. "I just said, no, no, didn't you hear me?" Even willfully asked everyone to do according to their own ideas, "I just want to do this, and no one can control it!" "How do you feel about such a person? I believe that none of you will have a good impression, nor will you think that this person must be very confident, or even think that this person is selfish, self-centered and does not know how to think of others.

What is the heart of such a person? There are several possibilities.

First, he may be a spoiled little emperor or princess, and the whole family revolves around him. He said "one" and "two", and no one taught him to be modest, considerate and sharing. As a result, he grew into a "giant baby" who only thought about himself, just like someone who came back during the epidemic, without isolation and cooperation, "I want to run! I don't run, who will take care of me if I am sick! " Such people are often called "baiwenhang" by us. In their world, there is no gratitude and sharing. Everything has become a habit for them. So he is willful and loses his temper, but he is not self-confident, but narcissism, an all-round narcissism from the original fantasy of a baby, thinking that he can do anything and get what he wants as long as he cries.

Second, he may have been criticized and neglected since he was a child, and he has his own inferiority and anxiety. In this way, some people may be surprised. Being criticized and ignored at an early age should make them feel inferior. People who feel inferior dare not lose their temper. Well, some people with low self-esteem may be afraid of losing their temper, but some people are just the opposite. These people have lived in an uncertain environment since childhood. At first, he thought that as long as they worked hard, won and did well enough, their parents would love themselves and be sure of themselves. However, with the passage of time, he gradually found that no matter how well he did, he could not get the recognition he wanted. So, he changed and began to protect his self-esteem. Whenever others have a little objection, he feels unsafe and challenges himself. This is what we often call "strength". Are strong people confident? No, it seems a little narcissistic to ordinary people, but it is the antonym of inferiority to psychology. Because of serious insecurity, you need to cover up your inferiority with conceit and narcissism.

So, a wayward and irritable person, do you like to associate with him? Do you think he doesn't feel inferior? Obviously, if it is purely from the personality characteristics, being willful and not losing your temper has nothing to do with inferiority, and it has nothing to do with it.

A person's inferiority complex is partly due to family environment, but there are also other factors.

1. Family education

Generally speaking, a person's inferiority complex has a lot to do with family education.

(1) is often ignored.

A child who is often neglected has a very poor sense of security. This is very common in families that prefer sons to daughters, or the eldest brother, eldest brother or children caught in the middle in some families. Many times, they often think that they are not good enough, so they can't get the attention of their parents. In fact, sometimes it is because parents are too busy to put a bowl of water flat, but children are not aware of this problem and need the correct guidance of their parents. If not, children may deny themselves and have low self-evaluation, and develop into a flattering personality, or develop in the opposite direction and become a strong personality.

(2) It is often denied.

Some parents may prefer boys to girls, or they may think that they are "aggressive" in education and never give their children affirmation. Even in our textbooks, there was a content that never praised their children, but only compared them with other children. This is actually a kind of harm to children. He may feel incompetent or the whole world may be full of malice. Therefore, he either becomes a cautious inferiority complex, or a strong man who strives for truth, or becomes a paranoid.

(3) Moral kidnapping

Moral kidnapping is the most common in many families in China. "You are big, let it be small." Actually, it depends on the situation. When a young man can speak, he can already read. He is not as ignorant or naive as most people think. On the contrary, jealousy is human nature, which was first reflected in children's rivalry for favor. Therefore, if the small one is unreasonable, it is not recommended to ask the big one to make way for the small one, but to let the small one know what he wants and what he doesn't want. If children are not taught to distinguish boundaries and defend their rights and interests from childhood, when they are adults, children are accustomed to being kidnapped by morality and will show the appearance of "sensible", but such people often suffer from "internal injuries" and are more likely to get depression than the average person.

2. Physical defects

There is no denying that physical defects will bring people primitive inferiority. Especially when one finds that everyone around him is healthy, but he is different from others. On the other hand, children are not necessarily innocent. Some children will laugh at others when they are young, compare with others, be violent ... when a person has physical defects (such as leg disease, slurred speech, deafness, etc. ), there are often some unfriendly voices around. Under the influence of this kind of voice, even if parents have a strong education, they will still feel more or less inferior, but relatively speaking, it is not that serious; However, if parents don't know how to comfort their children's injured hearts and don't know how to encourage them, inferiority will become a deformity that will accompany their children all their lives.

3. Growing environment

Why a person grows up is caused by many factors, family education is the primary factor, and other aspects are also inseparable.

(1) Poverty

Poverty will bring people a certain degree of inferiority, especially when poverty cannot meet the basic needs of life. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory, food, clothing, housing and transportation are people's basic needs, but if a person grows up in an area where even the basic needs can't be met, he may have serious inferiority or anger inside. Especially when he saw the outside world, there was a strong contrast in his heart.

(2) Campus environment and social factors

If you have experienced those unfriendly neighborhood relationships as a child, you will know how much influence society has on a child's growth, because there are always some adults who regard children as the source of their happiness. They deeply believe that "children don't care" and "children don't know anything" ... It is this concept that makes some so-called neighbors, relatives and friends unbridled with their children, making some harmful jokes and even making fun of them, which has a psychological shadow on their growth.

The campus environment is no exception. For example, in recent years, campus bullying has a good reputation. On the one hand, what can bully people at school may be bullying people at home. Such people are generally rich and powerful and have been protected by the school. On the other hand, it may be that the school thinks that it is normal for children to fight with each other and does not pay enough attention to it, thus leaving an indelible shadow on their growth and even leading to tragedy.

Why do some people dare not be willful and lose their temper? Maybe it's because he has no willful capital. For example, we often say "rich, willful!" If you want to be willful, you have to have willful capital. But sometimes money may not be willful, if it is often run on.

On the other hand, if "willful temper tantrums" means adhering to principles, sticking to the bottom line and daring to defend their rights and interests, then those who dare not "willfully temper tantrums" do have the possibility of inferiority.

However, if "willfulness and losing temper" refers to a person's personality characteristics, then those who dare not "willfulness and losing temper" are not necessarily "afraid", but may be "unwilling" to blindly "willfulness and losing temper", which is an internal cultivation. In this case, "willful temper tantrum" is a manifestation of selfishness.

People can keep a low profile, but they don't have to feel inferior; People should know how to safeguard their own rights and interests, but don't cross the line and infringe on others.

That's my answer. If you have any other questions, please leave a message in the comments section below and discuss with us!

That depends on when, where and under what circumstances.

Besides, is losing your temper and willfulness a sign of pride? It is foolish to lose your temper and be willful regardless of the occasion, person or place.

This kind of person doesn't even have the ability to control his temper. How can he go out alone? At home, because your family may tolerate you and accommodate you. It's not necessarily true outside.

Going out, even going abroad, is so arbitrary. What are the consequences? Can you and your family afford it ... think about it, otherwise it will only bring shame to this nation and country.

Suggestion: Listen to this song more, my people, my motherland.