Tomb-Sweeping Day funny jokes.

Jokes are short in length, simple and ingenious in plot, often unexpected, and give people a wonderful feeling of laughing suddenly. Most of them reveal absurd phenomena in life, which are ironic and entertaining. There are different tastes. The following is Tomb-Sweeping Day's funny jokes I compiled for you, for reference only, hoping to help you. Tomb-Sweeping Day's funny joke 1

Joke 1:

Yesterday, my husband came home with a bundle of paper money, one meter high, ready to burn paper for his parents over there.

I asked, "Why buy so many?"

He said, "Now that prices are so high, there will be price increases there."

joke 2:

after someone returns from ancestor worship, he dreams of his ancestors crying every night. I couldn't bear it, so I found someone to help me.

The master pinched his finger and counted, and was shocked: "What a sin! You sacrificed your ancestors with dyed steamed bread and meat mixed with lean meat."

Joke 3:

Tomb-Sweeping Day, his girlfriend went out to visit the grave with her family.

I called her: "What are you doing?"

She replied, "Remittance!"

joke 4:

Tomb-Sweeping Day, a friend visited the grave and sighed, "Now the paper money is made just like the real thing. When it is burned, it really hurts a little. After a wry smile, his wife calls, and his wife says," Why didn't you bring the money I left on the table? Besides, where is the sixty thousand dollars I just withdrew today? "

This buddy cried at the grave several times ................................................................................................................................................................... Just ask: Aha! Apple mobile phone 6? Can ancestors use it?

The shopkeeper gave him a blank look and said, What do you care if Jobs went down to teach himself? He bought one and was about to turn around when the boss reminded him: buy a mobile phone case, it's quite humid below.

He said yes, and the boss went on to say: Buy another Bluetooth headset. Recently, new traffic regulations have been issued below, which makes it very strict to drive and make phone calls. He bought another earphone, and the boss continued to kindly remind him: the most important thing is to buy a charger. Don't forget to burn the charger. It's not good to ask your ancestors for it later. It's still a trivial matter to ask you to send it! He bought a charger again. Tomb-Sweeping Day's funny jokes 2

1. It rains in succession during the Qingming Festival, and beautiful people on the road want to find their souls.

where can I ask someone? The door god pointed to another village.

2. Brother G asked me: Does Tomb-Sweeping Day go home to worship his ancestors?

I don't understand the answer: no, I'll send it by express.

elder brother g said: how do you know that your grandparents can receive it?

I proudly returned: I used the loan to pay.

3. The boy has been unable to find the object. On this day in Tomb-Sweeping Day, he hoped to be blessed by his ancestors by worshipping their ancestors and sweeping their graves. So he wrote a letter and burned it to his ancestors. The letter said: incense is hard to continue, ancestors bless me, there are too few girls, and it is hard to find a partner. If you don't protect me, I will be big.

"Come down, here's something" came a voice from a distance. Scared the boy's hair stand on end.

4. A girl was praying while tearing up Mingbi, when suddenly a gust of wind blew. Mingbi flies everywhere. Her mother said, pick up the money quickly. The girl said: You see the ancestors were in a hurry, and they have all been taken away.

5. Tomb-Sweeping Day went out and happened to be next to the graveyard. He remembered that he had forgotten his wallet, so he called Baba and asked him to bring it to me. While I was waiting, I was wandering. It happened that an uncle next to me came up and asked me, What are you doing here, girl? I said: Wait for my family to send me money ... Grandpa left without saying anything, and then ran away ...

6. What is April Fool's Day confession? Tomb-Sweeping Day's confession is king. In case of rejection, it can be said that ... I was possessed by a ghost just now ...

7. My family and I went to visit the grave in Tomb-Sweeping Day, and my girlfriend called me and asked me: Why? I said: send money to my family

8. Colleagues said: Why do I give gifts to my leaders, and the leaders still find fault with me? I said, what gift did you give? When did you give it? Colleague said: Tomb-Sweeping Day, I sent several big gold ingots ...

9. I went to the grave with my wife today. Because I was in a hurry, I found that I didn't bring my money with me after I went there, so I asked my wife to buy it in a nearby supermarket. I had to sit there smoking alone when a couple came. They asked me: What are you doing sitting here alone? I said: I am waiting for my wife to send me money. Immediately, the frightened man ran away, leaving only the woman paralyzed on the ground, howling and crying ... I was just about to stand up and comfort myself, but I tripped over a stone on the ground, and the whole person jumped on her, at which time my wife came back ...

1.

Yesterday, after notifying the grave sweeping activities,

Student: Do you need a broom to sweep the grave?

teacher: no need to bring it.

student: how long does it take to sweep the grave? Are we going to live in the cemetery at night?

teacher: I dare not live, you live!

student: teacher, I made a small white flower, and I'll give it to you!

Teacher: Thank you, I'm not dead yet.

11.

Q: "What's the difference between Valentine's Day and Tomb-Sweeping Day now?"

A: "Valentine's Day is the same as Tomb-Sweeping Day. They both send flowers and food.

The difference is that Valentine's Day burns real money and tells people a bunch of nonsense;

Tomb-Sweeping Day burns fake money and tells a bunch of people stories to ghosts. "

12.

Tomb-Sweeping Day is coming soon. When Zhang San went to buy a sacrifice, he saw an Apple mobile phone with paper.

Some people disagreed: Ah, can the ancestors use it when burning an Apple mobile phone?

The shopkeeper gave him a white look and said, Why do you care if Jobs went down to teach himself? Zhang San thought it made sense, so he bought one.

boss reminds: buy a charger! Be careful when you come back and ask for it. If it's a small matter when you come back, it's troublesome to ask you to deliver it!

my colleague was afraid that his ancestors would ask him to send it, so he had to buy another charger. When paying, my colleague asked the boss for a business card, and my colleague said that I would burn it with the sacrifice to my ancestors. If there is something wrong with my mobile phone, I can directly ask you for warranty! The boss fainted on the spot ..

13. If you have a wish to hide in your heart, say it. If you have a dream to hide in your heart, say it, and they will all come true. As for when, God knows. Haha, happy Tomb-Sweeping Day.

At this time, the customer asked the boss for his business card, and the boss asked why he wanted it. He said that I burned it for my ancestors, so that I could let my ancestors come to you in case of quality problems! ! Tomb-Sweeping Day's funny joke joke 3

Tomb-Sweeping Day, a buddy visited the grave and lamented: Now the paper money is made just like the real thing, and it really hurts a little when it is burned.

After a wry smile, his wife called and said, "Didn't you go to the grave?" Why didn't you bring the paper money on the table? Besides, where is the 6 thousand yuan I just withdrew today?

After listening to this guy crying at the grave for several times, people passing by praised him. It's really filial.

It's rare to cry at the grave.

In the evening, his grandfather gave him a dream: Grandson, you hurt people. The police in Yin arrested me and said I used counterfeit money. Tomb-Sweeping Day jokes 4

A: Brother, is it your first time to watch the tomb?

B: yes, I really don't like this job.

A: it's hard to find a job these days.

B: yes, I'm still a little scared in this hellhole at night, but it's better during the day.

A: then I'll keep it for you at night.

B: aren't you afraid?

A: I'm not afraid at night, but I'm afraid to come out during the day ... Tomb-Sweeping Day's funny jokes 5

Last year, a group of old friends applied to the university for the aged on a whim, and then they went around and forgot all about it. It's estimated that they haven't been there for half a year.

At noon today, President Lao Tan called everyone to go to school one by one. After all the people arrived, a Taoist priest came out, and for a long time, everyone was trapped ... Ask the principal what this is for?

The headmaster put his hand behind his back and said seriously, "Parents, please." Tomb-Sweeping Day's funny joke 6

When a couple were sitting at the beach, the husband always looked at every beautiful girl in the past, and the wife scolded her husband and said,

"Show some respect, Robert, you are already married!"

"what's the matter? If I eat sick rice, it doesn't mean that I have no right to read the recipes of luxury hotels! " The husband retorted. Tomb-Sweeping Day jokes 7

In the moral class, the teacher said, "When President Washington was a child, he once cut down a cherry tree in a plantation. Because he bravely admitted his mistake, his father didn't punish him. "

Then, the teacher asked," Why didn't Washington, who made a mistake, get punished? Who can tell us the reason? "

A boy stood up and said, "It's easy, because Washington has an axe in his hand." Tomb-Sweeping Day jokes 8

Female colleagues scold male colleagues: "You are a pig!"

The male colleague was angry and retorted, "I am a pig! ！”

So, these days, the tone of female colleagues is very strange.

"No pig, I went to a meeting!"

"pigs are strange, are they in the toilet?"

"Pigs are strange. What's for lunch?"

The male colleague couldn't bear it, and shouted at the female colleague, "No wonder I'm not a pig!"